Issues in Text Game Escalation: Seeking Advice

[HoneyNuts]

Hey everyone,

I'm currently dealing with some challenges in escalating via text, and I wanted to get some advice from this community. The goal is to escalate as much as possible through text to get the girl into a sexual mindset about me even before we meet. I'm wondering, is this even worthwhile?

The main problem is that escalation by text seems to be an extremely precise art. It feels like it's very easy to get ghosted if I overstep some imaginary line. On the other hand, if I escalate too little, the conversation gets boring for both parties. The conversations I have are trough mobile apps to girls I've never met in person.

For context, most of the girls I've been texting with are East Asian, but I've encountered the same issues with Western women. Here's a recent example to illustrate my point (We've already talked about meeting up sometime before; she is coming to visit my city):

Her: I want to go sightseeing, visit the market, and so on...
Me: Good idea, just don't get lost
Me: Since you love animals, I think you would love the local Aquarium. I recommend it.
Her: Let's go to the Aquarium
Her: Be careful not to get lost
Me: It's a date.
Me: Good girl.
Her: It's a date (wide eyes emoji)
Her: Please guide me in the City
Me: Yep. And some drinks after.
Me: Are you looking forward to it?
Her: radio silence...

As you can see, things seemed to be going well, and then suddenly, silence. This is a pattern I've noticed, and it's quite frustrating. I'm like 85% sure this one is salvageable but I still think I'm doing something wrong.

So, my questions are:

1. Is escalating via text to get a girl into a sexual mindset before meeting even worthwhile?
2. What are some effective strategies for escalation without crossing that imaginary line that leads to being ghosted?
3. How do you keep the conversation exciting without overstepping?
4. Any advice for a comeback with the girl in my example after shunning her for like a week?

Any insights or advice would be greatly appreciated!

Thanks in advance!


Regards, Honey Nuts

 

[Higher]

Me: It's a date.

Me: Yep. And some drinks after.

Id not have texted these as it sounds like u wanna set a very specific vibe that might have expectations tied to it. That might make girls uncomfortable.

She basically closed u for an encounter where the vibe is adventurous/spontaneous. That was very good. Just keep it that way. Improvise, then lead and escalate in person.

 

[Licker]

Me: Are you looking forward to it?

You overgamed her here on text. Being too clever is also a pitfall.

Remember she doesn't want to seem needy or an easy hoe.

Just text, "Awesome . There is [insert venue]. Let's meet at 8 on Friday". This is assuming you already have asked her when she's free.
If not ask her what her schedule looks like first.

Also, I wouldn't use the term "date". Just "lets catch up" or "let meet over for drinks/food/coffee".

Although it does seem like she was excited and then she thought did I make myself too easy? This guy is playing with me. Omg what to do?

 

[Skills]

A common mistake seducers make (Overreaching) - The Skills Method

Overreaching dictionary definition: To defeat (oneself) by overdoing matters, often by excessive eagerness or cunning: In trying to promote disunity he had overreached himself. Over gaming is when you have … Continue Reading →

www.theskillsmethod.com

 

[HoneyNuts]

Thank you for the responses, elders.

Seems like I overplayed my cards there. Any ideas what to say to recover the situation?

In general, is it even worth it trying to pre-escalate by text, or should I just close the date and do all the work there?

Is it bad practice to try to extract flirting/cute reactions from girls by text?
I do it sometimes just for the kicks, but its risky. The time invested/payoff ratio is poor from this kind of text game.

 

[Skills]

Thank you for the responses, elders.

Seems like I overplayed my cards there. Any ideas what to say to recover the situation?

In general, is it even worth it trying to pre-escalate by text, or should I just close the date and do all the work there?

Is it bad practice to try to extract flirting/cute reactions from girls by text?
I do it sometimes just for the kicks, but its risky. The time invested/payoff ratio is poor from this kind of text game.

@POB has a post saying in this type of situation don't forget to tell me what you think about the idea?

Next time don't over reach the drink text and the other ones after was Overkill..and it happens you get too excited and in the moment you think you have her closed and the eagerness and greed causes small mistakes and is ok part of learning..

I have not field tested cause have not had this situation lately but it seems another dude tried and it worked...

Another option is the eyes emoji and if she text back start from 0 or the morning with sun emoji ping and star from 0.

 

[HoneyNuts]

@POB has a post saying in this type of situation

Does anyone have a rundown of this or the particular thread? I Wasn't able to find it, he has more than a thousand posts.

 

[Skills]

Does anyone have a rundown of this ogr the particular thread? I Wasn't able to find it, he has more than a thousand posts.

Gonna post later different post to help you when i get home too much time has passed to pitch that you may need to ping and start from 0 when I get home i will link you some stuff...

 

[HoneyNuts]

Gonna post later different post to help you when i get home too much time has passed to pitch that you may need to ping and start from 0 when I get home i will link you some stuff...

Appreciate it. I'm fine with starting from 0, just need to get her to reply to my next message.

 

[Skills]

Appreciate it. I'm fine with starting from 0, just need to get her to reply to my next message.

Clarification on how i discover the text morning and the why it works as a ping

Ok guys so sometimes i see post on good interactions follow by no responses, or good interactions by an statement that causes radio silence from the women, or lose of momentum in a texting convo, or good interactions but for logistics not contact for days or weeks till meet.... So when i...

www.skilledseducer.com

Calls & Texts - How to properly hard close (set up logistics for meet up)

A hard close is defined as finding out when the girl is available for you 2 to meet and arranging the meeting (logistics).... I specifically advice this after you get high investment and properly soft closing a girl. A basic structure is to ask "how does your schedule looks like?" or "how...

www.skilledseducer.com

i have not field tested, had no need to, but some other member tried:

Calls & Texts - Text game: A very simple ping for when you try to seed the date and is left on read

For context, please read this first (and the comments): https://www.skilledseducer.com/threads/text-game-how-to-ping-without-putting-her-to-sleep.27916/ Let's say you are texting her back and forth using a proven structure. (Like: get the number, ping, banther, soft close, hard close > date)...

www.skilledseducer.com

 

[HoneyNuts]

Clarification on how i discover the text morning and the why it works as a ping

Ok guys so sometimes i see post on good interactions follow by no responses, or good interactions by an statement that causes radio silence from the women, or lose of momentum in a texting convo, or good interactions but for logistics not contact for days or weeks till meet.... So when i...

www.skilledseducer.com

Calls & Texts - How to properly hard close (set up logistics for meet up)

A hard close is defined as finding out when the girl is available for you 2 to meet and arranging the meeting (logistics).... I specifically advice this after you get high investment and properly soft closing a girl. A basic structure is to ask "how does your schedule looks like?" or "how...

www.skilledseducer.com

i have not field tested, had no need to, but some other member tried:

Calls & Texts - Text game: A very simple ping for when you try to seed the date and is left on read

For context, please read this first (and the comments): https://www.skilledseducer.com/threads/text-game-how-to-ping-without-putting-her-to-sleep.27916/ Let's say you are texting her back and forth using a proven structure. (Like: get the number, ping, banther, soft close, hard close > date)...

www.skilledseducer.com

Thanks for the informative articles.

I went with the good morning ping to no response. I guess that's it for this one. Kind of cold to ghost someone you've been chatting with for weeks over a "let's get drinks" message. It is what it is. Going to work on other leads with a slightly more cynical opinion on women from now on...

Regards, Honey Nuts

 

[gameboy]

No need to be cynical, just save the game playing until you have her out in person.

Did you notice the "wide eyes emoji" ? Looks like you scared her off saying it"s a date.

 

[Higher]

with a slightly more cynical opinion on women from now on.

Man, i know it sucks, but dont get cynical about this.

Try approaching this as piano practice, or sport practice, or whatever other hobbies u might have. Its cool to be able to pull off that crazy chord progression or that steps sequence that scores u a point in a way ud never have scored before. We all want to score and be successful, especially when we invest a lotta time in what we do.

By all means, try to be successful. Its a great goal to have.

But dont get too attached to the result. Again, its just practice.

In this game sometimes u win big, many times u "lose" small. Thats how it works.

Ghosting happens to everybody and it sucks, but being cynical about it will only hurt u. Its not gonna hurt anybody else.

U can only realize, maybe something came up on her side and she cant text me right now.

Or hey, maybe shes no longer that interested now, is she? Guess those texts were not optimal after all, good thing i know now what to work on. Next time ill do better.

No big deal. Keep working on urself and increase ur value. Grind thru it if necessary.

Some time in the near future ull look back to this and think, damn is this how i used to text? I really made good progress didnt i?

 

[alexlaguma]

Man, i know it sucks, but dont get cynical about this.

Try approaching this as piano practice, or sport practice, or whatever other hobbies u might have. Its cool to be able to pull off that crazy chord progression or that steps sequence that scores u a point in a way ud never have scored before. We all want to score and be successful, especially when we invest a lotta time in what we do.

By all means, try to be successful. Its a great goal to have.

But dont get too attached to the result. Again, its just practice.

In this game sometimes u win big, many times u "lose" small. Thats how it works.

Ghosting happens to everybody and it sucks, but being cynical about it will only hurt u. Its not gonna hurt anybody else.

U can only realize, maybe something came up on her side and she cant text me right now.

Or hey, maybe shes no longer that interested now, is she? Guess those texts were not optimal after all, good thing i know now what to work on. Next time ill do better.

No big deal. Keep working on urself and increase ur value. Grind thru it if necessary.

Some time in the near future ull look back to this and think, damn is this how i used to text? I really made good progress didnt i?

Exactly this!!

Don't get cynical bro. This is a journey / process - enjoy it as you watch yourself get better and work things out.

What I've started to do (inspired by some others on here) is keep meticulous records on things. I've never been a numbers / data guy, but I'm starting to really see the value in it. Specifically I'm tracking -

# of approaches p/ week
# of phone numbers taken
# of no responses to text messages (this is VERY low for me, like 1 no response from 20+ numbers over the past month
# of dates from phone numbers (again this is LOW for me ... not good enough)
# of flakes on dates

What this is helping me do is see the PATTERNS of where I am good and where I am bad, and that is allowing me to take action.

So for example - its clear to me I have a 1 in 3 ratio of approaches to phone numbers. For every 3 girls I approach I get a phone number. Bearing in mind I am only approaching v hot girls this is pretty good. I'd say 80% of the 'nos' have been "i'm v flattered but I have a bf" no's, and 20% have been just not comfortable with being approached.

What is also clear is I am TRASH at converting numbers to dates. I've messed it up many times. So I am now investing energy into -
A) Seeding the date on the actual approach so there is less to mess up , and ...
B) Actually studying my text game and seeing what I'm doing wrong, and FIELD TESTING stuff from this site and seeing if it works for me.

This shift in seeing this as a game with patterns is really helping me remove the emotion from everything. I'm literally just field testing stuff to see what works ... keeping the stuff that does and dropping the stuff that doesn't.

 

[Skills]

Thanks for the informative articles.

I went with the good morning ping to no response. I guess that's it for this one. Kind of cold to ghost someone you've been chatting with for weeks over a "let's get drinks" message. It is what it is. Going to work on other leads with a slightly more cynical opinion on women from now on...

Regards, Honey Nuts

Wait another day and send eyes emoji...if that doesn't work don't delete number and just ping next holiday comming up.. Halloween (happy Halloween)i guess, but yes maybe dead...

@HoneyNuts if the eyes ping doesn't work, wait a day and send a hail Mary aka ball in your court text...

 

[HoneyNuts]

You guys are right about not letting it get to you! Just a momentary lapse fueled by frustration. The research will continue.

This shift in seeing this as a game with patterns is really helping me remove the emotion from everything. I'm literally just field testing stuff to see what works ... keeping the stuff that does and dropping the stuff that doesn't.

This is great advice and I will heed it the best I can.

It's interesting though, that when you have a setback, it's like the other girls you are texting sense it too somehow? You get shorter or no responses at all and have to work harder to keep any kind of conversation going. Girls you see on the street also seem more disagreeable. It must be an inner game problem deriving from anxiety.

Mastering text game seems to be harder than I thought. You either escalate too little and the conversation gets boring, or escalate too much and they will think you a creep. The difficulty keeping the girls attention is fully correlated with her attractiveness. It's a raw game, with a lot of competition. Maybe grinding enough so you can categorize the girls with reasonable precision and use preset tactics will bear fruit.

Wait another day and send eyes emoji...if that doesn't work don't delete number and just ping next holiday comming up.. Halloween (happy Halloween)i guess, but yes maybe dead...

I'll give this a try.


Regards, Honey Nuts.

 

[Skills]

You guys are right about not letting it get to you! Just a momentary lapse fueled by frustration. The research will continue.


This is great advice and I will heed it the best I can.

It's interesting though, that when you have a setback, it's like the other girls you are texting sense it too somehow? You get shorter or no responses at all and have to work harder to keep any kind of conversation going. Girls you see on the street also seem more disagreeable. It must be an inner game problem deriving from anxiety.

Mastering text game seems to be harder than I thought. You either escalate too little and the conversation gets boring, or escalate too much and they will think you a creep. The difficulty keeping the girls attention is fully correlated with her attractiveness. It's a raw game, with a lot of competition. Maybe grinding enough so you can categorize the girls with reasonable precision and use preset tactics will bear fruit.


I'll give this a try.


Regards, Honey Nuts.

Okay you did not see my edit..if the eyes emoji doesn't work you can wait a day or two and send a ball in your court text, nothing to lose, hail Mary text and example is on what the dealing with reds on my post:

Simple/basic texting guide

There are 2 types of texting most guys use: 1.- long texting setting sexual frames.- This is hard to do, but is possible to do with experience. I had to rely in this style for 2 reasons: a.-) I relied a lot on physical game, no talking dance floor game and i had a heavy latin accent. b.-) By...

www.skilledseducer.com

 

[HoneyNuts]

Okay you did not see my edit..if the eyes emoji doesn't work you can wait a day or two and send a ball in your court text, nothing to lose, hail Mary text and example is on what the dealing with reds on my post:

Simple/basic texting guide

There are 2 types of texting most guys use: 1.- long texting setting sexual frames.- This is hard to do, but is possible to do with experience. I had to rely in this style for 2 reasons: a.-) I relied a lot on physical game, no talking dance floor game and i had a heavy latin accent. b.-) By...

www.skilledseducer.com

Holy shit the eyes emoji worked. It's back on! I guess persistence has it's place too!

Thank you, Skills.