ITT: Cities you would avoid because of the women and dating culture, why?

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

Ever since I have moved to Seattle I have been happy with my results in terms of women. Being a korean american guy who has a thing for white girls, I have seen more than enough asian men (south, east, and southeast) + white women couples in the city. Right now I am visiting my family in the Dixie but I go back to Seattle in a few days. I already had my fundamentals down but being in the south meant that I had an uphill battle to get the kind of women I wanted (attractive white girls). Even if I was to get those women, going out of your own race for relationships is largely frowned upon throughout the region. For me, location has made the world of a difference and doesn't talked about enough. Here I am in the US and just two different sides of the country differ so much.

For me, there are some cities which based on experience, what I have heard, and talked about that I would not want to step foot in.

1. San Francisco and any city in the Bay Area - When I was in the south, relationships that involved men of minority groups with white girls in general were frowned upon. In San Francisco, from my own experience staying there during my adolescence and recently as well, there seems to be some kind of a special hatred towards all Asian men. When I went there I noticed the large amounts of white males with asian females but almost no asian males with white females. I have had friends and family members there that in San Francisco there is a special kind of stigma attached to dating an Asian male whether he is good looking or not. It seems like the worst city in America to be an Asian male, particularly if you want to go for white women. The women are nothing to brag about either. That and the 49ers suck

2. Atlanta - Its not that I have anything against any race of people but I am just not attracted to black women and will not date one. Atlanta is mostly black women along with some white southern girls which means they usually won't go for foreign looking guys (asian guys) even if they are of quality. That and having stayed in Atlanta I found that it was very cliquish in the areas that did have white girls (old southern crowds, etc.).

3. Toronto - Same reason as San Francisco and most Bay Area cities, I feel like there is a social stigma in those cities which limits Asian men from having success with women of other races (in my case white women who I have a thing for). I noticed tons of Asian women + White men couples but hardly any couples the other way around (don't even recall even meeting or seeing one in Toronto). Guess I am weird for noticing this kind of stuff but seeing other Asian men do well kinda lifts my spirits.

The one thing I have noticed about Toronto and San Francisco from staying and even reading about those cities is that there seems to be very cliquish kind of culture there. Like there are a lot more elitists and status hungry people to the point where the parts of those cities which aren't immigrant strongholds (aka the parts with white people in them) seem to full of women that are a lot more concerned about what kind of guys they are seen with. Could be reflected on the cost of living there but I would do my best to avoid those cities.

 

[Stewie]

Honesty man, I use to have this mentality, but it really does you no good. Who cares what the social stigma is in San Fran? If you are a strong, dominant, and great guy, regardless of you color or background women will be dying to be with you Asian or non Asian. Secondly, I have never bee a fan of "I never really found x race attractive" because frankly you probably have not been around x race long enough to appreciate their beauty. Plus not all black women are ghetto and loud .

I just think you may need to tweak your perceptions a bit. Just my 2 cents

R4l

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

Honesty man, I use to have this mentality, but it really does you no good. Who cares what the social stigma is in San Fran? If you are a strong, dominant, and great guy, regardless of you color or background women will be dying to be with you Asian or non Asian. Secondly, I have never bee a fan of "I never really found x race attractive" because frankly you probably have not been around x race long enough to appreciate their beauty. Plus not all black women are ghetto and loud .

I just think you may need to tweak your perceptions a bit. Just my 2 cents

R4l

1. I spent a lot of my adolescence in the south (particularly Louisiana) where black people are almost the majority so yes I have had years of experience telling me that I just don't dig black girls. Ghetto or not, I am just not into girls with african features and don't even find a lot of black female celebs attractive (in b4 lots of pics of black female celebs and posters saying I am gay because I am not into them), take that as you may. I don't get this shit about telling a guy to be open minded and change his preferences, fuck that shit, I like what I like and there is no point in telling me differently.

2. You can be a dominant, strong, and great guy in San Francisco but if you are an asian chasing after white women there then it just won't happen because of the social perceptions that exist in that city. White girls in san fran just don't like asian men (any kind of asian men) because of the social racism that exists towards men of asian backgrounds. A black guy in San francisco will have no problems but an asian guy pursuing white girls there has a tough time ahead of him. Judging by my experiences in the city, I would say it is almost next to impossible if you are a quality asian male chasing after a anne hathaway or kate upton (hot white girl) there.

 

[Stewie]

I never said to change your preferences, just to be sure that there is a logical reason why you don't like x, which I was not getting from your original post. Of course everyone has their preferences, no one is denying that, but to swear off a particular thing, which I took it you were saying, is a whole different thing. At least in my opinion. Anyway keep doing you and getting white girls . Cheers

R4l

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

My friend, preferences are never logical, male or female. It isn't about the stereotypes the mind makes up, it is about how a woman's appearance gets your hormones going and gives you that erection when you see her and just wanna get her into bed.

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

Most guys I have talked to are not crazy for black girls either and I am in the same boat, for me it is a mixture of physical appearance and my own experiences interacting with young black women. I won't go into it more than that since we don't need any racism on this great site.

As for the thread, I have thought about moving to Canada but everyone is telling me how bad Toronto is as a city for most young men. I am in a relationship right now so I won't be chasing tail there anyways but I have heard a lot of bad things about Toronto. The pickup scene there is so bad these days that you cannot go anywhere with your girlfriend without having at least a few guys run cold approaches on her. Then I have read about the elitist and cliquish culture there too.

For me, I would avoid Atlanta because the dating culture there sucks. It seems more like a city where you would settle down after you have a wife and kids rather than one where you would want to meet women. I did not find a lot of young attractive women in the city compared to other places, would take other cities like Charleston or Miami over Atlanta anyday.

Another city I want to put on the list is San Jose, they call it Man Jose for a reason because the sex ratios there are so skewed to favor women. I will disagree with OP on San Francisco, lots of European tourists seem to go to the city and like other guys I do love European women.

All in all though, it helps to know whether a city is more of a place for young professionals or one for people who are just looking to settle down and start families. Any world class city like LA or NYC is fairgame.

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

Places like Toronto and San Francisco that are very liberal when it comes to politics but what I notice is that there is a lot of behind the doors kind of racism in these areas. It isn't in the form of people calling you racial slurs or anything people openly discriminating against you but it is more subtle and deeply hidden. People will be nice and act kind to your face if you are an asian male but the second they see you with a heather graham or an anne hathaway lookalke their true colors will show. Now since it isn't wrong in a liberal society to be racist towards an asian or arabic person at all I could see racist comments flying and even opposition to such interracial couples.

It just makes me a bit sad that on most forums on the internet you cannot even talk about this topic without there being some heavy animosity towards a certain race yet I am grateful that this forum somewhat allows that talk. For me, changing locations meant everything. Lousiana just didn't have a lot of hot girls and the very few it did have were closed off to going interracial. The good thing is that the racism there was obvious and open but most of all it didn't target one particular ethnic group, if you didn't look white but wanted to date a white woman then there would be problems.

In San Francisco and Toronto, the racism is more on a social level and specifically targets asian males especially in the dating market. The girls there risk lowering their status by a lot if they hook up with an asian male and that hurts even the asian men that are of quality because of the herd mentality a lot of the women have.

Which makes me ask the question, just what it is about Seattle that stops it from being such a way? I see attractive white women here with all races of men and no one really cares, it is somewhat common.

 

[BarryS1]

Another city I want to put on the list is San Jose, they call it Man Jose for a reason because the sex ratios there are so skewed to favor women. I will disagree with OP on San Francisco, lots of European tourists seem to go to the city and like other guys I do love European women.

I live in San Jose In my experience, there's a lot of married immigrants coming to the South Bay Area to settle down. So girls growing up in the suburbs usually leave after turning 18 to attend school in SoCal or move north to SF or Berkeley. It is possible to have success here, but 70% of my cold approaches have been on women 28+ years old. All of my male friends living in the South Bay Area who aren't in a 4+ yr. LTR w/ their high school gfs are having a difficult time dating.


The one weekend I visited San Francisco for pickup was the best weekend I've ever had. I could throw a rock and hit a hot girl! I had the same experience running into European women on Easter weekend - amazing!

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

I like Northern California when it comes to living and just how peaceful it is but the problem for me personally are race relations there and very low perception of Asian men whether it is Daniel Henney, Bi Rain, Jackie Chan, Sanjay Gupta, Sendhil Ramamurthy, or Godfrey Gao. For some reason the perception is not as bad in Seattle and I have no idea why.

Now I don't doubt that San Francisco has some dime pieces but if you are an Asian male it is not even worth a visit, especially if you are like me and have an attraction for White women.

Toronto and Northern California are two places which I would advise all Asians (indian or chinese) to stay far far away from because the dating culture there specifically targets and discriminates against those men. Though that discrimination might happen nationwide and throughout the west, in those two areas specifically it is terrible and targets Asian men in particular. Not to mention that it is under the carpet too.

The one thing I hated about San Francisco is that a lot of the hot white girls there were out of reach and well covered in the sense that you needed to be in their circles to have a chance with them. Compare that to a city like San Diego where you find a hot blonde on the beach and can just talk to her.

I think Toronto and Bay Area are probably good areas to raise a family in but for a young male bachelor, especially if he is asian or looks asian, they should be avoided at all costs. No matter how high quality of an asian you are, you will never get white girls there.

 

[BarryS1]

I think Toronto and Bay Area are probably good areas to raise a family in but for a young male bachelor, especially if he is asian or looks asian, they should be avoided at all costs. No matter how high quality of an asian you are, you will never get white girls there.

I think we can extended the hardships for a bachelor in the dating scene to all suburban areas. Young people seem to flock towards heavy urban areas.

In terms of racism, I can't compare because I have not traveled around the U.S. besides short overnight visits. So you think despite being in a diverse area, Asian were the #1 pick-on group for racism? I haven't given ranking racism that much thought until now.

EDIT:

If it helps I can tell you about the Asian guys I knew who dated white girls in the Bay Area. I noticed a pattern among the niches:

-Mixed Martial Arts (MMA) studios
-Lifted truck group
-Surfing groups
-Well dressed luxury retail employee/manager
-Raver that goes to Electronic Dance Music (EDM) festivals
-Marathon runner (This one is huge, people get in groups to train together. I've meet a couple white female/asian male couple there).

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

I think Toronto and Bay Area are probably good areas to raise a family in but for a young male bachelor, especially if he is asian or looks asian, they should be avoided at all costs. No matter how high quality of an asian you are, you will never get white girls there.

I think we can extended the hardships for a bachelor in the dating scene to all suburban areas. Young people seem to flock towards heavy urban areas.

In terms of racism, I can't compare because I have not traveled around the U.S. besides short overnight visits. So you think despite being in a diverse area, Asian were the #1 pick-on group for racism? I haven't given ranking racism that much thought until now.

I won't say "racism" since no one is shouting racial slurs at you and there is not much systematic racism in the city but more so prejudice and a social stigma attached to dating of one particular race and gender. San Francisco and Northern California might be great for a black guy as there is no racism against black people there but I would say that along with Toronto, San Francisco is probably the worst city in North America to be an Asian male who has his shit together. I would say it is even worse than the south because at least there Asian men who were of quality (had their shit together, great fundamentals, etc.) had a chance to date attractive asian girls but in San Francisco most of the attractive asian girls are going for white guys (same as with Toronto) and most of the attractive white girls will not even look at you if you look foreign (asian or indian) regardless of how handsome and charming you are.

The reason is that couples in San Francisco which involve attractive white women with asian men (they are very rare in the city) face a lot of prejudice and often have their status lowered in society. People like neighbors, coworkers, and even strangers are openly rude to the couple and are in shock as to how such a couple even happened. They will slowly hint and let you know that you two shouldn't be together and she should be with a black or white man.

Now all of this being the case makes the dating game in San Francisco very difficult for a man who is asian even if he has good looks, great fundamentals, and is a cool guy.

So no, San Francisco is not racist in the Jim Crow sense but it has a different kind of racism. The system and society there is set up to prevent relationships between decent looking white women and asian men from happening.

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

I spent a lot of my adolescence in the Bay Area. Managed to do alright for myself, got with an Indian girl, some latin girls, and would have some great sex with this Russian blonde at my high school who was older than me, we dated too. Still have to say that it is a terrible area to be in if you are any kind of an Asian male who is looking to go after white girls. When I was with the Russian blonde (who was attractive btw) I would get open racism from time to time because people could not believe a beautiful blonde would date some south asian gentleman. In the past I have posted threads on how I went back to the Bay to visit my parents and got into a confrontation because I was with my girlfriend (an attractive blonde). So happy to have left the Bay Area when I did.

As an Asian male who wants to chase after white girls (and even asian girls that aren't FOB), everything in the Bay Area is stacked against you:

1. Obviously the stereotypes about asian men are much worse in the bay area than anywhere else in the country. From my own experience people will often call you out and pick try to get under your skin if you happen to date an attractive white woman. There IS a special kind of racism on a social level that is

2. Not that many attractive white girls to go around anyways outside of the few European tourists and some of the Russian girls there, your average "white" (anglo) girl does not even care for her appearance. The few attractive ones that are there, the competition is very intense for them and they run in tight social circles which would be tough for an outsider to penetrate.

3. Because of 2, the few attractive white girls that are there have massive egos and won't even look at you if you don't have the looks, money, and the status. I have known quality asian guys who have struggled with white and asian women in the bay area, it is a tough place to be.

I am happy to have left that place and other than visiting family I won't go back there. It slowly crushes your mind and your self-esteem just being there. What you will find a lot of there are white liberals who swear they are not racist but will do the most racist things and say the most racist things to you if you are an Asian or Indian male. There is a lot of animosity between minority groups in the bay area too. Not to mention that it is one of the most expensive places in the USA to live in.

Some parts of the Bay Area may be excellent if you are trying to raise kids and give them a nice environment to live in but overall the Bay Area is terrible for meeting women and dating. If you are an asian or indian dude, I would avoid the bay area unless you already have a family started.

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

I knew San Francisco was bad but the one thing I would give people there credit for is tolerance, sorry you guys had to go through what you had to go through.