- Joined
- Feb 18, 2024
- Messages
- 78
This one was a success and a failure. Success because I cold approached a girl in a foreign country and she journeyed across the city to meet me, and then came back to my place and got physical. Failure because it was getting hot and heavy and then she quickly left. I try to focus on the positive, but it really does suck when things fall apart at the last minute like this.
So a few days ago I am walking around a massive outdoor shopping area in Medellin, low key in a state of awe because of all the attractive well proportioned Latinas all over the place. I see a short curvy girl walking with a bike up ahead, and I do a little jog to catch up with her. I start talking to her in garbage Spanish, not really caring about my words but focusing on my vibe. She seems kind of aloof but then gestures for my phone, which I give her. She starts writing into google translate and I am surprised to see a phone number. She says to text her if I want to meet up.
First number close in a foreign country--nice!
We meet up last night at a park near my airbnb, and she buys me a beer from a little mini mart, thus kicking things off with some investment (in addition to the fact that she has travelled across the city to my turf). Good start. She is smiley and flirty and I feel like she is into me without me really trying. In my experience, this is also a good sign. She is an artistic free spirit artsy type. Her English is decent. She also reveals to me later that she has never wanted kids and got the necessary surgery to prevent this years ago. She is 28 and is close with her family. Funny enough, we run into her ex early in the date, who she goes up to and hugs.
After the first beer we go play pool and drink more beers (one potential problem emerging is that we are drinking a fair amount--I think we're 3 deep at this point, and she is small). I have her give me her arms one at a time and I physically inspect her arm tats. Touching here and there, teasing about this and that. Things seem good. We leave the pool hall and I ask if she wants to grab a few more beers and go back to mine. She says yes to beers, no to my place. I roll with it and say ok lets drink another at the park, which we do. At the park I feel like we really start vibing, but we are also kind of sauced at this point.
She notices I'm physically uncomfortable sitting on the park bench and suggests we go somewhere more comfortable. "Um OK, how about my place?" I suggest for the 2nd time. This time, she agrees, but insists we get more beer. OK, I am officially getting plastered with this girl. Whatever, I'm on vacation.
Back at the place, I lounge on my couch while she stays standing. She starts quizzing me on some note cards I have for an upcoming test. I play along and she starts getting closer to me, eventually settling on the couch while I'm touching her on and off and continuing to banter and flirt. She is quite literally testing me, and apparently I'm passing because she's rewarding me by getting closer. This seems like it's going to end well. (However, this process takes longer than 10 minutes, so I do not observe the 10 minute kiss rule in this case. I allow her to soften up at her own pace. Is this a mistake? Should I have commanded her to come sit sooner?)
Once she's joined me on the couch and her body languages seems open, I go for the kiss. Unfortunately, she resists. I am unfazed and continue bantering (it's so much easier to be unfazed when intoxicated; obvious but this was a strong reminder). I back off far a while and continue bantering, possibly for too long. I want to give her time to get comfortable and not come across as pushy. She starts grilling me on why I approached her, how weird it was that I did that in that shopping center. I answer jokingly, treating it as one big test not to be taken seriously. At a certain point I try for the kiss again and she rebuffs again. Possibly a man handle kiss would have been appropriate here...? I really don't know.
While I'm navigating these treacherous waters in search of a kiss, I play with the idea of accusing her of being scared to kiss me. Then I see she has the uber app open on her phone. Uh oh! So I let it fly: "Hey...are you scared to kiss me? Seems like you are." This has an excellent impact on her. She playfully acts insulted and then starts kissing me passionately. We've probably been at my spot for an hour at this point. She then fully mounts me. I start running my hands up and down her body. I lift her shirt up to reveal her breast. I go for a suck but she resists. I back off and keep kissing/touching.
And then...
She swiftly gets up, calls the uber, and starts to leave!
I tell her not to go but with flat affect, and don't move from my position on the couch at all. I think I come across as pretty unreactive. I communicate that I don't want her to go but seem like I don't particularly care if she does. She has trouble unlocking the door, so I get up and unlock it for her.
As she's leaving she says we can do it again and that I have her number. I don't respond verbally but just stand at the door holding up the peace sign. She doesn't look back to see it. End of story.
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The fuck is going on here? This type of shit is actually pretty common for me. My guess is that I am almost succeeding at being "the lover" but falling just short.
Any insight would be appreciated. Thanks for reading gents.
So a few days ago I am walking around a massive outdoor shopping area in Medellin, low key in a state of awe because of all the attractive well proportioned Latinas all over the place. I see a short curvy girl walking with a bike up ahead, and I do a little jog to catch up with her. I start talking to her in garbage Spanish, not really caring about my words but focusing on my vibe. She seems kind of aloof but then gestures for my phone, which I give her. She starts writing into google translate and I am surprised to see a phone number. She says to text her if I want to meet up.
First number close in a foreign country--nice!
We meet up last night at a park near my airbnb, and she buys me a beer from a little mini mart, thus kicking things off with some investment (in addition to the fact that she has travelled across the city to my turf). Good start. She is smiley and flirty and I feel like she is into me without me really trying. In my experience, this is also a good sign. She is an artistic free spirit artsy type. Her English is decent. She also reveals to me later that she has never wanted kids and got the necessary surgery to prevent this years ago. She is 28 and is close with her family. Funny enough, we run into her ex early in the date, who she goes up to and hugs.
After the first beer we go play pool and drink more beers (one potential problem emerging is that we are drinking a fair amount--I think we're 3 deep at this point, and she is small). I have her give me her arms one at a time and I physically inspect her arm tats. Touching here and there, teasing about this and that. Things seem good. We leave the pool hall and I ask if she wants to grab a few more beers and go back to mine. She says yes to beers, no to my place. I roll with it and say ok lets drink another at the park, which we do. At the park I feel like we really start vibing, but we are also kind of sauced at this point.
She notices I'm physically uncomfortable sitting on the park bench and suggests we go somewhere more comfortable. "Um OK, how about my place?" I suggest for the 2nd time. This time, she agrees, but insists we get more beer. OK, I am officially getting plastered with this girl. Whatever, I'm on vacation.
Back at the place, I lounge on my couch while she stays standing. She starts quizzing me on some note cards I have for an upcoming test. I play along and she starts getting closer to me, eventually settling on the couch while I'm touching her on and off and continuing to banter and flirt. She is quite literally testing me, and apparently I'm passing because she's rewarding me by getting closer. This seems like it's going to end well. (However, this process takes longer than 10 minutes, so I do not observe the 10 minute kiss rule in this case. I allow her to soften up at her own pace. Is this a mistake? Should I have commanded her to come sit sooner?)
Once she's joined me on the couch and her body languages seems open, I go for the kiss. Unfortunately, she resists. I am unfazed and continue bantering (it's so much easier to be unfazed when intoxicated; obvious but this was a strong reminder). I back off far a while and continue bantering, possibly for too long. I want to give her time to get comfortable and not come across as pushy. She starts grilling me on why I approached her, how weird it was that I did that in that shopping center. I answer jokingly, treating it as one big test not to be taken seriously. At a certain point I try for the kiss again and she rebuffs again. Possibly a man handle kiss would have been appropriate here...? I really don't know.
While I'm navigating these treacherous waters in search of a kiss, I play with the idea of accusing her of being scared to kiss me. Then I see she has the uber app open on her phone. Uh oh! So I let it fly: "Hey...are you scared to kiss me? Seems like you are." This has an excellent impact on her. She playfully acts insulted and then starts kissing me passionately. We've probably been at my spot for an hour at this point. She then fully mounts me. I start running my hands up and down her body. I lift her shirt up to reveal her breast. I go for a suck but she resists. I back off and keep kissing/touching.
And then...
She swiftly gets up, calls the uber, and starts to leave!
I tell her not to go but with flat affect, and don't move from my position on the couch at all. I think I come across as pretty unreactive. I communicate that I don't want her to go but seem like I don't particularly care if she does. She has trouble unlocking the door, so I get up and unlock it for her.
As she's leaving she says we can do it again and that I have her number. I don't respond verbally but just stand at the door holding up the peace sign. She doesn't look back to see it. End of story.
----------
The fuck is going on here? This type of shit is actually pretty common for me. My guess is that I am almost succeeding at being "the lover" but falling just short.
Any insight would be appreciated. Thanks for reading gents.
