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Make sure you touch her

Tony D

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Jul 26, 2018
Messages
434
Touch

When men first get into pickup, their #1 concern is “What to say.” They focus nearly 100% of their energy on verbal game. And this is understandable, because if they were super duper beautiful they could just toss a few pics up on Tinder and score all the nines, right? (I jest).

But after they pass through newbie land and gain some confidence in their verbals, they hit a plateau. Now they can talk, but they can’t seem to bust past this platonic conversation zone. Or they’re able to ramp up some sexual tension, build rapport and trust, but they’re not escalating past this quickly enough, and losing their opportunities.

This is where TOUCH comes in.

When I first discovered the power of kino, it was from this old pua who called himself Mehow. He was this goofy looking dork who liked to go “Woo hoo!” but I liked his infield videos. They were some of the first on the Internet. In one video, he demonstrated this move where he put his hands palms up, and would interlock fingers with girls. It was part of some routine which I don’t remember. But that night I went out to try this move, and fucked the first girl I tried it on. I totally forgot the routine, but the girl was super into just holding hands.

After that I gained confidence. I became much more “huggy” and “touchy”. I would grab girls by the wrist, touch their legs, stomaches, shoulders, and to my surprise, 99% of them didn’t mind at all, and actually seemed to like it. Now if I go to a party, I usually have a girl sitting on my lap within a few minutes of a good hook. It’s just natural to be very physical.

You can also be physical in daygame. Most guys don’t know this because they’ve never tried. It’s always “But what if she doesn’t like it?” Well… what if she does? You can escalate from a handshake, to a high five, a hug, a spin, a dance in the street, a piggy back ride, and a full makeout. I’ve done all of the above during daygame.

This isn’t a comprehensive guide on all things touch, just a reminder that if you’re neglecting this, it should be your main focus for at least a month of solid exploration, experimentation, and then make it part of your regular repertoire. You won’t get very far without it.
 

niger9dm

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Aug 9, 2019
Messages
11
Once I was talking to a girl in a bar. She was invited by one of my friends so the talk we had was Ok.
After a few minutes we left to an apartment for the afterparty and she sat next to me in the van, the I tried to touch her knee but she rejected me two times.
I acted aloof and tried to keep talking as if notheing has happened but that killed the vibe and she autorejected (sort of).
Any advice for situations like these?
 

Seppuku

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Aug 25, 2014
Messages
1,149
Most probably your touch wasn't calibrated, and came out of the blue. You need to get there progressively. How to proceed:

  1. "Incidental" touch. Where you touch her sort of "accidentally". Example, you are speaking, and on a high point of your conversation, you briefly touch her forearm, or the back of her hand, as if to highlight what you are saying.
  2. "Deliberate" touch. Example. You too are walking, and when you guys cross the road, you lead her with your hand on the small of her back.
  3. "More intimate" touch. Like touching her leg, or her belly, or running your hand in her hair.
Step 4 would be "sexual touch". That's when you sexually escalate her after you isolated her.

It seems to me that you jumped straight to 3. You should go through 1, then 2, then 3. With experience, you will know when you can shortcut the sequence. When done properly, it is incredible what you can get away with.

In your situation, the way to handle the off vibe, would have been to take a big step back, act as if nothing happened, and just proceed from step 1 again. It may, or may not work. The best way is always not to fuck up in the first place :).

EDIT. Acting aloof was probably not a good idea.
 

niger9dm

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Aug 9, 2019
Messages
11
Most probably your touch wasn't calibrated, and came out of the blue. You need to get there progressively. How to proceed:

  1. "Incidental" touch. Where you touch her sort of "accidentally". Example, you are speaking, and on a high point of your conversation, you briefly touch her forearm, or the back of her hand, as if to highlight what you are saying.
  2. "Deliberate" touch. Example. You too are walking, and when you guys cross the road, you lead her with your hand on the small of her back.
  3. "More intimate" touch. Like touching her leg, or her belly, or running your hand in her hair.
Step 4 would be "sexual touch". That's when you sexually escalate her after you isolated her.

It seems to me that you jumped straight to 3. You should go through 1, then 2, then 3. With experience, you will know when you can shortcut the sequence. When done properly, it is incredible what you can get away with.

In your situation, the way to handle the off vibe, would have been to take a big step back, act as if nothing happened, and just proceed from step 1 again. It may, or may not work. The best way is always not to fuck up in the first place :).

EDIT. Acting aloof was probably not a good idea.

Thanks man, I'll keep this in mind next time.
 

Tony D

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Jul 26, 2018
Messages
434
Seppuku is right. In MOST cases you need to ramp up to something like putting your hand on her knee. But even for me I recently had the same situation, where I touched a girl's legs and left my hand there. She said "don't just touch my legs" or something. An hour later we were making out. You just have to stay cool and don't apologize for it. Try again later. Of course, that's assuming she's attracted to you at all, which with experience you'll be able to tell.
 
a good date brings a smile to your lips... and hers
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