- Joined
- Jan 17, 2014
- Messages
- 83
Hello gents,
Well I had an interesting night talking to probably the most narcissistic girl I've ever met.
So anyway, my school had an end-of-the-year party for all the graduate students. Turns out the vice president of the Grad Student Org., Mike, is a friend of mine who I also went with to undergrad (Mike was also an RA in my building.) I see him there, and his friend, lets call her Christine, comes up to him, they exchange niceties, and he introduces me to her. So for the rest of the night (2.5 hours) I was talking to her. The conversation was obviously too long to list here, but I am going to share some points in the conversation I remember distinctly for the reasons that I did something right, or did something wrong, and where I could have improved.
[Biggest player, Could have done better]:
At one point, she asked which one of the RA's in the building was the biggest "player." I answered not him (Mike), but responded with the same question when she was an RA at her undergrad. I feel like I should have made some comment like, "I feel like you're not the type to do relationships, you probably have no time with all your work," as a way to bring up the topic of her relationships and the implication that she may like to move fast with guys. (I said "you probably dont have the time" because she previously made it painfully aware to me that she worked over 65+ hours a week, not including being a full time student, and how she was able to manage it all so well)
[Bragging, I liked how I handled it, teased her a bit]:
Later, she was going on about how she had 4 bachelors degrees, and was valedictorian all 4 years, and RA of the year for 3 years in a row, and that she's so good at anything she does, that as a she is literally qualified for any possible position in a school setting, I ain't making this shit up) So I was a little fed up with the bragging and started to tease her about it. I said lightheartedly, "you really like to brag, huh?" She smiled and laughed, but really started defending herself by saying that it's not bragging and that she always excels at everything she always does, always (literally, I'm not joking, thats the jist of what she was saying). After she stopped talking, I started shaking my head and chuckling. She smiled and said what, I said "the more you say, the more you realize you're just proving my point." (this comment may not have been good, but sometimes I cant resist a good retort.)
[Bragging again later, she wouldn't shut the fuck up about how amazing she was, I wasn't sure how to handle this one]:
She said something about her previous incompetent boss (she of course mentioned that now she's higher up the chain than him, and manages 4 departments and how those departments are all running so much better and how the events they planned have a much much higher turnout than ever before.) She had said that her boss had asked her to remove all the awards that she had on her wall, because he thought she was gunning for his job. I said jokingly "Well, you should definitely forget about your job in Texas, and take over his department!" (Oh yeah, shes got a job lined up as a school advisor/psychologist as soon as she graduates in a few weeks, because again, shes so amazing at everything she does). She laughed at the comment, and I followed it up with a few more witty responses, but being mindful not to increase her value.
[Continuing with the bragging, I was getting annoyed at this point]:
So guess what? She also owns her own corporation! Did I forget to mention that earlier? As she was talking herself up, I think she could see how I thought she was bragging, so she actually interrupted herself at one point to say that she wasn't bragging. I laughed and said "I think you and I have different definitions of the word 'bragging' ." She again responded by saying that it's not bragging if you actually have the qualifications and have put in the work to do it. Whatever, I wasn't about to open that can of worms, so I tried to end all talk about stuff she's accomplished, even though she would always unnaturally bring it up, I'd try to steer the conversation away from it, back into my control.
[Where she lives, not asking how I did in this situation, just looking for your take on the situation]:
At one point she mentioned something about her apartment. I asked where her apartment was. Now any normal person would have assumed this means, "where is the general area you live in." But she seemed to take it very awkwardly and was like "why do you want to know where my apartment is, like do you wanna know what my room number is or something?" I was very confused and said "I was just curious where the general location was, like I live in the Plaza apartments, other people live in the apartments off campus." She said "Oh, I live in the downtown apartments." I don't get it, was her awkward reaction like an auto defense mechanism because she thought I was gonna ask her back to her back to my place? Because bringing up "do you wanna know my room number" is an oddly specific thing to assume that I'm asking for.
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So, after reading this post, and then re-reading the title of the post, you might ask yourself "Randy, what the fuck are you smoking? You were never even close to getting her if this is what your conversation was like." The entire conversation wasn't like this, the conversation was actually pretty smooth, and I was witty and generally doing a good job, these parts just served as awkward detours that stood out that I felt impeded the flow.
Another part I feel I needed a lot of improvement on was moving fast, the conversation lasted too long in my opinion, and meandered a bit in certain places. If I focused my efforts, I could pare down the length of time, and increase my returns.
During the conversation, she mentioned that she had to get up really early to go help some engineers fix some problem at the place where her corporation is. I thought, "oh whatever, maybe she'll be more inclined to come back if I suggest we have a drink at my place" But nope, can't do that. Why, you ask? Well she's got a liver problem, where if she drinks alcohol, her white blood cells eat away at her liver, so she doesn't drink. She explained this to me in excruciating scientific detail to demonstrate how much she knew about Biology, one of her four Bachelors degrees. So I had little to work with, considering I still don't have flirting or body language down, so I didn't muster up the courage to ask her back to my place.
Now I know I can't blame this on her, girls are girls, and it's up to us guys to lead them, but how do you deal with people like this? And how were my responses to some of the things she said?
Well I had an interesting night talking to probably the most narcissistic girl I've ever met.
So anyway, my school had an end-of-the-year party for all the graduate students. Turns out the vice president of the Grad Student Org., Mike, is a friend of mine who I also went with to undergrad (Mike was also an RA in my building.) I see him there, and his friend, lets call her Christine, comes up to him, they exchange niceties, and he introduces me to her. So for the rest of the night (2.5 hours) I was talking to her. The conversation was obviously too long to list here, but I am going to share some points in the conversation I remember distinctly for the reasons that I did something right, or did something wrong, and where I could have improved.
[Biggest player, Could have done better]:
At one point, she asked which one of the RA's in the building was the biggest "player." I answered not him (Mike), but responded with the same question when she was an RA at her undergrad. I feel like I should have made some comment like, "I feel like you're not the type to do relationships, you probably have no time with all your work," as a way to bring up the topic of her relationships and the implication that she may like to move fast with guys. (I said "you probably dont have the time" because she previously made it painfully aware to me that she worked over 65+ hours a week, not including being a full time student, and how she was able to manage it all so well)
[Bragging, I liked how I handled it, teased her a bit]:
Later, she was going on about how she had 4 bachelors degrees, and was valedictorian all 4 years, and RA of the year for 3 years in a row, and that she's so good at anything she does, that as a she is literally qualified for any possible position in a school setting, I ain't making this shit up) So I was a little fed up with the bragging and started to tease her about it. I said lightheartedly, "you really like to brag, huh?" She smiled and laughed, but really started defending herself by saying that it's not bragging and that she always excels at everything she always does, always (literally, I'm not joking, thats the jist of what she was saying). After she stopped talking, I started shaking my head and chuckling. She smiled and said what, I said "the more you say, the more you realize you're just proving my point." (this comment may not have been good, but sometimes I cant resist a good retort.)
[Bragging again later, she wouldn't shut the fuck up about how amazing she was, I wasn't sure how to handle this one]:
She said something about her previous incompetent boss (she of course mentioned that now she's higher up the chain than him, and manages 4 departments and how those departments are all running so much better and how the events they planned have a much much higher turnout than ever before.) She had said that her boss had asked her to remove all the awards that she had on her wall, because he thought she was gunning for his job. I said jokingly "Well, you should definitely forget about your job in Texas, and take over his department!" (Oh yeah, shes got a job lined up as a school advisor/psychologist as soon as she graduates in a few weeks, because again, shes so amazing at everything she does). She laughed at the comment, and I followed it up with a few more witty responses, but being mindful not to increase her value.
[Continuing with the bragging, I was getting annoyed at this point]:
So guess what? She also owns her own corporation! Did I forget to mention that earlier? As she was talking herself up, I think she could see how I thought she was bragging, so she actually interrupted herself at one point to say that she wasn't bragging. I laughed and said "I think you and I have different definitions of the word 'bragging' ." She again responded by saying that it's not bragging if you actually have the qualifications and have put in the work to do it. Whatever, I wasn't about to open that can of worms, so I tried to end all talk about stuff she's accomplished, even though she would always unnaturally bring it up, I'd try to steer the conversation away from it, back into my control.
[Where she lives, not asking how I did in this situation, just looking for your take on the situation]:
At one point she mentioned something about her apartment. I asked where her apartment was. Now any normal person would have assumed this means, "where is the general area you live in." But she seemed to take it very awkwardly and was like "why do you want to know where my apartment is, like do you wanna know what my room number is or something?" I was very confused and said "I was just curious where the general location was, like I live in the Plaza apartments, other people live in the apartments off campus." She said "Oh, I live in the downtown apartments." I don't get it, was her awkward reaction like an auto defense mechanism because she thought I was gonna ask her back to her back to my place? Because bringing up "do you wanna know my room number" is an oddly specific thing to assume that I'm asking for.
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So, after reading this post, and then re-reading the title of the post, you might ask yourself "Randy, what the fuck are you smoking? You were never even close to getting her if this is what your conversation was like." The entire conversation wasn't like this, the conversation was actually pretty smooth, and I was witty and generally doing a good job, these parts just served as awkward detours that stood out that I felt impeded the flow.
Another part I feel I needed a lot of improvement on was moving fast, the conversation lasted too long in my opinion, and meandered a bit in certain places. If I focused my efforts, I could pare down the length of time, and increase my returns.
During the conversation, she mentioned that she had to get up really early to go help some engineers fix some problem at the place where her corporation is. I thought, "oh whatever, maybe she'll be more inclined to come back if I suggest we have a drink at my place" But nope, can't do that. Why, you ask? Well she's got a liver problem, where if she drinks alcohol, her white blood cells eat away at her liver, so she doesn't drink. She explained this to me in excruciating scientific detail to demonstrate how much she knew about Biology, one of her four Bachelors degrees. So I had little to work with, considering I still don't have flirting or body language down, so I didn't muster up the courage to ask her back to my place.
Now I know I can't blame this on her, girls are girls, and it's up to us guys to lead them, but how do you deal with people like this? And how were my responses to some of the things she said?
