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LR  MILF, Invited Home for Tea

Grand Pooba

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Dec 6, 2012
Messages
1,458
Met this woman at a meditational/sensuality meet up group in the city. She's 31, divorced, and has a five year old child and lives at home with her parents, but works as a middle school teacher at an all girls Catholic school. 5'7", brunette with gray eyes, a warm smile and appearance, talkative and friendly, really cute face and her body is pretty average by my standards. Not super skinny, not overweight, fair boobs, just pretty average all around.

A few weeks ago I saw her and introduced myself, talking to her just in a very friendly way, but it turned out that she actually lives only twenty minutes away from me in the suburbs. Logistics are a huge issue for me, as I live about an hour from the main city (where I meet most women), and so usually I end up going over to a girl's place (if they're okay with it) and they rarely want to come visit me. At the time of meeting her I actually didn't intend to pursue her as an intimate partner; I was legitimately more interested in our meditational practice (which is partnered) and thought it could be fun with her since she's so close by and allows it to be a better routine.

I met her on January 27. Sent the usual introductory save my number text and all that, got a great response. I tried to meet up with her twice in the last two weeks, and both times she wanted to come over and meditate but our plans were messed up by snowstorms. On February 9 (last Sunday) she planned to come over at 9pm to meditate (at this time I'd already given her my address), but the moment she left her house it began to snow. She called me and basically said she's turning around and won't be able to make it, is too scared to be stranded. I told her that it's fine, I completely understand and wouldn't want her to get stuck here, and that we can reschedule for another time. I also briefly remarked on this conference I did that weekend (below).

*Side note: I took this conference last weekend Feb 7-9 on teaching men to connect, interact, and succeed with women on a deep, empathetic level. The point of it was to interact with women based on feel and not formula, how to relate to them, and it really boiled down to ego destruction and partaking in games/activities that put you outside of your comfort zone and status quo. This conference, coupled with GirlsChase philosophy (the ideas presented in both were surprisingly similar), has done amazing things for me in the past week.*

About fifteen minutes after her cancellation call I get a ring from a different woman who is in this meet up and is also a casual lover of mine, and she wanted to hang out. She lives further away than the MILF but still wanted to come see me and spend the night. So I sent the MILF this text exchange:

ME 2130: I am looking forward to meditating with you. My conference just finished and I really wanted to meditate with someone after that, but I think I have someone else coming now so it's ok. <I think a part of me wanted to make MILF jealous with this text>
HER 2133: Wow, good for you, that's great!
HER 2134: Would love to hear a little bit about your conference at some point
ME 2143: Happy to share
HER 2144: :)
ME 2144: Damn snow
HER 2317: So did she end up coming over? <Success!>
<next day, Monday>
ME 1716: Yeah

Last Week:

So Monday evening is when our meet up happens, and guess who was there? MILF! Before it started, I sat down with her on a couch and chatted a little bit (5min or so), and told her that since this conference I've been feeling pretty messed up but in a good way, and it's like my life has turned backwards. I've been far more sensitive and have been behaving like a delicate flower, and she could empathize. She apologized for not being able to make it, I told her that I completely understand and that it's okay since someone else came over and we practiced (*AHEM*), so I'm really glad that she made it home safely.

My fundamentals were spot on during this time. I could say anything and she was eating it up. We chatted pretty friendly more or less, I told her a little more about activities we did in the conference, and also told her that since Sunday afternoon I've been getting a crazy amount of attention from women, and have been brutally honest with everything I am feeling. This is actually a truth, it's like my Mojo was out on full display Sunday afternoon and even at the meetup that evening I was getting tons of attention from women. GirlsChase has taught me what to look for when girls show interest, and I could see them everywhere. I felt very calm and collected, and a subtle smile was constantly on my lips.

At the end of the session I decided to take a risk. She was hanging out with another guy (who had his arm around her), and while he was talking to a third person I approach MILF. Our conversation went something like this:

ME: Hey, I think I'm heading out, but I just wanted to say bye before I go.
HER: Yeah, it was great to see you!
ME: Definitely, so you'd still like to come over sometime?
HER: Yeah, I'm down, that would be nice.
ME: Well, I have to tell you something. I'm trying out this brutal honesty thing and so far it's working out really well. I think I want more with you than to just hang out and meditate. In fact, you're very pretty and I'm attracted to you.
HER: Oh. <she said this with lots of intrigue>
ME: Are you single?
HER: Umm...yeah, I am. <I looked briefly at the guy she's with, and then back at her, then paused for two seconds as I held my gaze>
ME: Cool, well, I'd like to get to know you better in that way. So maybe we can get together for tea then?
HER: Sure! You have my number, just reach out.
ME: Yup, I'm not sure about my schedule yet but I'll definitely do that. See you then.
HER: Good night!

Fundamentals were critical to this exchange. The conversation was very polite and friendly but there was an intensity in my eyes and face that was projecting a very different message. I don't know what I was doing, for me it was very natural.

Fast forward to this past Thursday, during a snowstorm. Text exchange:

ME 1216: Hey <MILF>, hope you're staying safe in this weather. What do you think about getting together for tea sometime in the next few days?
HER 1222: If my son's school is open tomorrow I'm free tomorrow late morning (my school is closed)
HER 1223: Or I could ask my mom to watch him for a couple of hours on Saturday
ME 1223: I imagine you can't travel today? <It was snowing hard>
HER 1225: Def don't feel like venturing out in this
ME 1242: Haha I know ;-) good that you're staying home. 10-16" expected; not sure how tomorrow is going to be, but can we stay in touch and perhaps play by ear when to get together?
HER 1248: Sounds like a great plan
ME 1316: Ok :)

Inviting Her Home for Tea:

I've been busy since Thursday with other women, so Sunday afternoon (yesterday) I realized my evening would be free. I texted again.

ME 1410: Hi <MILF>, how was your weekend? Would you like to get together for tea tonight or Tuesday evening?
HER 1452: Tonight works
HER 1452: 8:30?
ME 1503: I think that should work for me.
HER 1529: Great. I'll call you at 8
HER1530: Tea at your place or you want to go to a coffee shop?
ME 1603: I think places will be closed at 8:30pm, since its Sunday? But I am open to it. My place?
HER 1604: You're place is good :)
HER 1604: Your place
HER 1605: Excuse my misuse of you're!
HER 1605: At the circus. Distracted.
ME 1605: Hahahaha ok, talk to you later then. Have fun!
HER 1915: Planning on leaving here 8ish. Should take me 20min or so.
ME 1915: I should be home at 8:30
HER 1917: :)
ME 1958: 8:35
HER 1959: Cool

At Home, Yesterday:

She came over at 8:35 last night; we exchanged pleasantries and I told her I'm glad to see her and it's great we were finally able to connect. The temperature in most of my house is 55F, so very cold; only my bedroom is a warm 70F.

I grabbed us tea and we sat on the couch. She was sitting on one side of it cross legged facing me (like an Indian meditational pose). I sat on the other side and faced her, my left leg crossed with my right heel touching the floor. We began to talk about how our week has been, and I used this opportunity to deep dive her. I found out about her career and how she got to where she is, how she got to be in this point in her life. She shared lots of details, and everything cleared up: she used to be very depressed after her divorce five years ago and has come a long, long way since that time in her life. She has been partaking in a lot of healing, has quit alcohol and substances, and is generally working hard to turn her life around. She reveals that generally she's done healing in women's only groups, but made one exception about this meditational meetup. I tell her I've noticed amazing things only happen when you cross your comfort zone, and I get agreement.

I told her that maybe we can meditate while she's here, but right after that I brought up a bigger issue: the reason I wanted to hang out with her isn't just to get to know her and be friendly, but because I also find myself attracted to her and I want something more. I asked her how she felt about that. She said that she really appreciates my honesty, because she got that feeling from me before. These days though, she's trying out seeing people simultaneously and isn't used to this feeling, and is getting a little bit stressed out by the thought of managing seeing more than one person at a time. She reveals that she's been a serial monogamist for most of her life (exclusive relationships), and only in September she broke off an engagement to a man and decided not to remarry. I probed a little deeper into it, and she revealed to me that she actually likes sex a lot, but hasn't found suitable matches in either of her serious engagements. Her ex-husband wanted to fuck her far too many times in a day, while the ex-fiance had a very low sex drive and didn't know how to please her. She mentioned that it took him about three months before really figuring out how and what pleases her, and she's found that her current two partners have figured out everything immediately.

This was an excellent opportunity to relate to her. I told her again that I'm trying out this new thing of being brutally honest, and though usually I don't kiss and tell, ever, I am actually seeing three people myself (truth) and have been getting a great deal of interest from women lately. I am not sure what it is, but it's also a little unsettling because now managing all these people is starting to become a challenge and I don't want anyone to get hurt in the process, while I figure out what I want. I told her I understand exactly where she's coming from. She agreed with me 100% and her face lit up with excitement when I was sharing this. I made sure to thank her for her honesty, and told her that in practicing our meditation I feel far more sensitive to women and in relating to them. It's coming across to me in a strange way, because it's been manifesting itself in being very sensitive and brutally honest. I then admitted to her that I sent her a text when she cancelled on me because I wanted to make her jealous. She didn't comment much on it.

ME: Well, cool, so maybe we can make out a little bit later.
HER: Hahaha, you know I was actually thinking about that on the way here. I'm down, but maybe not just yet?
ME: Yeah, that's cool. So where were we...oh yeah, you were telling me about your life healing?
Our conversation carried on. It ebbed and flowed from topics now of aspirations (where do you want to live?) to healing and how failure in life brings new revelations, to sexuality based conversations. I shared a lot of deep vulnerabilities. What stuck out most is when I brought up sexual repression in American society. I told her that it seems to me that women are inherently very sexual creatures, wanting sex more than men, but society has led them to believe it's shameful to express that side and be free. Her eyes lit up and she nodded in agreement, and told me that most of her life she's been ashamed of wanting sex, and only recently is trying something new and embracing it. She said she likes having sex daily. We continued to talk on the subject of sex and how people can figure out what the other likes. I ask if she is attracted to women because she's been in so many all women's groups, and she says no, that she still is very much attracted to guys. We talk a bit about her partners and I shared about mine, and she was very content and happy with the honesty.

I moved up closer to her, looking her deeply in her eyes. She was in the same position, but my hand right hand was now on her left kneecap and my left arm to the side, and we were still talking about platonic things. I am now in her intimate zone, and she hasn't budged. The conversation has flowed naturally.

About five minutes later I went for the kiss. I moved in very quickly while I brushed her hair with my left hand, and instantly I saw her eyes turn into bedroom eyes. We repositioned on the couch and I was now straddling her while she's on her back. I took off my sweater, and she remarked: "I want to take off clothes but it's really cold." Okay, I said, we can just go downstairs, it's warm there.

The time? Around 9:15 or 9:30.

She eagerly led the way and I showed her my room. Without any prompting she got on the bed and waited for me to get on. She didn't notice that it wasn't made, or that I hadn't changed the sheets from a different girl who was in it with me a little over twelve hours before. Thirty minutes later we're completely naked and going at it. Zero LMR.

At 11:30pm, after some post coital cuddling and a long massage I gave her, she left to go home. We kissed goodbye and agreed to potentially hang out Tuesday. She send this:

HER 0003: Made it home. Thank you for a great evening. Really enjoyed being with you tonight.
ME 0005: Great! Thank you for coming over, I really enjoyed your company.
HER 0006: :)
I am one lucky motherfucker. There have been four women in my bed in the last seven days (I will post another LR soon) and I can't believe this is happening. This has been one of the best weeks of my life, guys. Thank you for reading. Stay focused and keep learning and breaking your boundaries.
 

thedude

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 9, 2012
Messages
288
Haha Ozzo this is pretty damn cool man.


Also, my father actually told me once that people who work hard tend to be luckier than others. You my friend have been working hard :D
 

maximus6004

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Jan 28, 2014
Messages
367
You my friend are in a beast mode moment, not that your methods aren't working. However i'd like to quote hitch

She agreed to go on a date with you, your in, all you have to do is not screw it up...... or something along those lines

The conversation parts are awesome, however telling her you want to make out with her and just doing it is the difference between attraction and greater attraction. try putting that as on of your improvements. It's harder and takes you out of your comfort zone but is just that much greater in attraction.

On the other hand i do like how you mention the juggling the woman as that is something that i am working on talking to woman about. Thanks for sharing your interaction for me to learn from!!!

All the best!

Maxmilion
 
you miss 100% of the shots you don't take

Grand Pooba

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Dec 6, 2012
Messages
1,458
maximus6004 said:
The conversation parts are awesome, however telling her you want to make out with her and just doing it is the difference between attraction and greater attraction. try putting that as on of your improvements. It's harder and takes you out of your comfort zone but is just that much greater in attraction.

You're right; for me I am trying to get better at feeling this out with a woman before going for it. I do agree an unexpected kiss is generally far more powerful.
 

Mr.Rob

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Jun 16, 2013
Messages
1,897
*Side note: I took this conference last weekend Feb 7-9 on teaching men to connect, interact, and succeed with women on a deep, empathetic level. The point of it was to interact with women based on feel and not formula, how to relate to them, and it really boiled down to ego destruction and partaking in games/activities that put you outside of your comfort zone and status quo. This conference, coupled with GirlsChase philosophy (the ideas presented in both were surprisingly similar), has done amazing things for me in the past week.*

This first off this caught my attention. Sounds like a cool class that apparently opened your mind and comfort zone a little bit by the sounds of it. Tell me about the ego destruction and partaking games/activities that put you outside your comfort zone. Sounds deadly close to social freedom which I think is critically important to success in the social arts and life in general. Basically how most people let the thoughts of other people they don't know control their actions and keep them in their comfort zones.
I'm very curious as to what you learned and what stuff you did to destroy your ego more.

I find it interesting how candid you were when talking to her about how you felt about her. I'm not going to lie based on how you wrote your report it sounded like you were saying it in an almost nice guy way (though for all I know you may have been straight James Bond fundamentals, just based on how you wrote it is all) but I think the fact you did it in a way that was bold she ate it up.

ME: Well, cool, so maybe we can make out a little bit later.
HER: Hahaha, you know I was actually thinking about that on the way here. I'm down, but maybe not just yet?
ME: Yeah, that's cool. So where were we...oh yeah, you were telling me about your life healing?
Lol I found this interesting. I can't believe you actually suggested that so directly, definitely not status quo here.

I hate to say it but the conversation seemed to be mostly platonic, though I assume you must have had some sort of sexy vibe going on because she was definitely DTF. Also the fact you made it known you don't kiss and tell, view sex as something awesome and beautiful, and were overall non judgemental probably went pretty far. Though I have a ton of trouble going from platonic conversation to sexual conversation. It's like whenever I need to do transition I scramble trying to find a way to sexual convo and once I get there I'm thinking "how the fuck did I get here again?"

Anyway sounds like you've hit a good run of success lately. Inspiring for me to go do one more approach, touch her a little sooner into the interaction, get a little more sexual/explicit.

Don't get lazy ;) !

But yeah I'd love to hear about what you gained from your conference. Keep up the reports mane.

-Rob
 

Grand Pooba

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Dec 6, 2012
Messages
1,458
Mr.Rob said:
This first off this caught my attention. Sounds like a cool class that apparently opened your mind and comfort zone a little bit by the sounds of it. Tell me about the ego destruction and partaking games/activities that put you outside your comfort zone. Sounds deadly close to social freedom which I think is critically important to success in the social arts and life in general. Basically how most people let the thoughts of other people they don't know control their actions and keep them in their comfort zones.
I'm very curious as to what you learned and what stuff you did to destroy your ego more.

While there were numerous different games and activities that we did, there were two activities that they had us do that really fucked me up.

The first one involved writing down a list of five women you'd make amends to if you had the chance. Then we ranked them in order of importance. Then we were paired up with other individuals and we were to coach our partner/have our partner couch us on which women were the most important. We were then to call these women on the spot and make amends, either by speaking to them or leaving a voicemail. This fucked me up because I was calling women with whom I had messed things up with earlier in the past year and setting our relationship straight, so to speak. It felt to me like I was reigniting fires with women whom I'd long extinguished things with and who'd forgotten about me/who I'd forgotten about, but things were left on a sour note at the time of our separation. The idea of calling them made me extremely uncomfortable. After doing it, I felt more fearless, because doing it didn't kill me or hurt me.

The second game was to write two lists: ten vulnerabilities about yourself that you'd never share with a woman, and ten deep desires that you'd never share with a woman about what you'd want to do to or with them. Out of these lists, the staff picked three out of each. We then went to the main train station in our city and approached attractive women to simply share our top three desires and vulnerabilities with no purpose and to assess/feel their reactions. The goal was not to get dates or numbers, only to share our side. I approached ten women in this game in the span of an hour and a half. It was a lot of fun and I surprisingly got some great reactions (and phone numbers) from some girls. It also took me outside of my comfort zone, as I was being very direct and sexual to complete strangers with whom I'd only been talking for about 30 seconds typically.

My top three vulnerabilities:
- I have panic attacks with new women in the moment right before intimacy and lose my erection because of fear.
- I don't trust women.
- Sometimes I really deeply hate who I am.

My top three desires:
- I want to take you home tonight and rip you apart one layer at a time.
- I know you're a nymphomaniac and I know exactly what to do to bring it out.
- I want a threesome.

These two games I'd say destroyed my ego (because I was forced to partake in an uncomfortable situation), and really made me fearless about being my authentic, true self (hence nice guy tendencies) with complete strangers.

Mr.Rob said:
I find it interesting how candid you were when talking to her about how you felt about her. I'm not going to lie based on how you wrote your report it sounded like you were saying it in an almost nice guy way (though for all I know you may have been straight James Bond fundamentals, just based on how you wrote it is all) but I think the fact you did it in a way that was bold she ate it up.

ME: Well, cool, so maybe we can make out a little bit later.
HER: Hahaha, you know I was actually thinking about that on the way here. I'm down, but maybe not just yet?
ME: Yeah, that's cool. So where were we...oh yeah, you were telling me about your life healing?


Lol I found this interesting. I can't believe you actually suggested that so directly, definitely not status quo here.

I hate to say it but the conversation seemed to be mostly platonic, though I assume you must have had some sort of sexy vibe going on because she was definitely DTF. Also the fact you made it known you don't kiss and tell, view sex as something awesome and beautiful, and were overall non judgemental probably went pretty far. Though I have a ton of trouble going from platonic conversation to sexual conversation. It's like whenever I need to do transition I scramble trying to find a way to sexual convo and once I get there I'm thinking "how the fuck did I get here again?"

I'm going to say that this report is a bit odd as far as my history in seduction is probably going to go. I think fundamentals and, more importantly, my vibe were absolutely critical in how this whole thing ended up happening. You're absolutely right to point out that what I was saying was extremely platonic and like a nice guy, and honestly I feel that it was when viewed from that perspective. I was being pretty freakin' nice and I wasn't trying to be sexual or seductive intentionally. What's missing here and what I can't really showcase in this report is that my inner sense of calmness and most notably confidence was spot on in this exchange with her. I'd just had the best week of my life with various women and had had plenty of sex in that week, and I think my mojo was on full display. I was not nervous IN ANY WAY. I It didn't really matter what I said, because I didn't give a fuck at that time whether or not I'd actually fuck her; it was simply that my attitude and the way I conveyed it was masculine, confident, self-assured, and relaxed. Sharing frames about sexuality and being non-judgmental were definitely huge in showcasing how I'm okay with the arrangement, but not as great as were the fundamentals presented through my body language.

It also helped that she was pretty direct and clear herself about what she wanted and where she is. That's why I could get away with being as direct as I was when I told her I wanted to kiss her.

Mr.Rob said:
Don't get lazy ;) !

I have to write an update in my journal; I have just gotten reemployed, and so will be approaching and practicing GC material once again. Looking forward to your next report, Rob!
 

Marty

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Jul 17, 2013
Messages
1,525
Ozzo:

This is tremendous. I only just got to your report, I was away for a week or so and had a lot of catching-up to do with work and such.

Your ability to isolate a woman in private is something I very much admire and wish to learn from.

ozzo said:
There have been four women in my bed in the last seven days
—shows that you are meeting the objective of participating in this process. Well done!

ozzo said:
HER 2317: So did she end up coming over? <Success!>
There's something very subtle about this... on your part, not on hers. You simply said you were having a visitor—for all she knew, it could have been a family of four invited over for dinner. But she correctly intuited it was a lady, and in contrast to your own subtlety, she blatantly gave the game away.

ozzo said:
I think I want more with you than to just hang out and meditate. In fact, you're very pretty and I'm attracted to you.
I like this. I'm usually pretty straight too, and women seem to appreciate it.

ozzo said:
HER 1530: Tea at your place or you want to go to a coffee shop?
How did you get her to actually suggest this? Any idea?

ozzo said:
Her ex-husband wanted to fuck her far too many times in a day
Something odd about this, don't you think? Usually men get bored with their womenfolk after a few years and need some "fresh material"; this guy sounds as if he managed to keep the excitement there, to her eventual exhaustion. I wonder how.

ozzo said:
I want to take off clothes
Sounds as if you somehow landed yourself a very amenable lady, Ozzo! :)

-Marty
 
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