FiELD REPORT
I think the reason why we are afraid to approach women -- at least in my case -- is intention and motivation deep down inside.
I approached two women today at the same lounge as the last post. This is a description of the place -- A garden type lounge (big trees, 80s music playing in the background) which was extremely popular with the older generation although it is going through a rebrand to attract a younger clientele. These kinds of places are popular in the African country that I live in. The reason why I describe it is to give you an idea of where I am approaching women. Alot of women do not hang out here but it's convenient, cheap and near my home.
Today, I sat at my usual spot with a beautiful young woman sitting and working on the couch besides me. She was wearing a green form fitting shirt and green camouflage pants with simple sandals. She was dark-skinned with braided hair. Not very curvaceous but not petite either. Tall. A go-getter -- She was aggressively calling and looking for clients.
In my last post, I noticed that I failed to talk to a woman who was also working at the same lounge. She was in Sales while I work in Advertising and Marketing which should have given us common ground. I decided this time not to make the same mistake.
I said hallo and started asking her about her work - she explained in detail what she does. I talked about my own work and we went back and forth on how we can work together. She gave me her business card.
The conversation did not go beyond that but when she was leaving and I said goodbye -- She smiled and gave me that feminine 'bye'. It was nice.
I know it's not seduction per se but I noticed that I wasn't nervous at all with her. We talked about her work (which interests me), I was able to find something about her that genuinely intrigued me, and I wasn't trying to get something from her. (Of course, I was trying to get her number but I was focused more on what I can give her -- opportunities for business).
In contrast, Lady #2, was a short petite woman on her phone sitting at the bar, probably waiting for someone (All of this was during the day). She was wearing a simple traditional dress with an African pattern. I wasn't intentional as I was with the first lady.
I asked her about her dress (it intrigued me because I had worked with a woman who made products with the same African material) but honestly, I had nothing to offer her so the conversation fizzled out. When I said goodbye, she smiled. (Probably because she was glad I wasn't going to bother her anymore hahaha).
This is what I have learnt when it comes to approaching --
1. Be intentional about everything.
2. Find something that genuinely interests you about the woman.
3. Know what you want, but also know what you are offering her.
Those are just my thoughts.
