Need some help with low sex drive issues

[Mr.Rob]

This has really been a damper on my spirits lately.

I'm about to turn 22 and my sex drive is really low in the past year. Whereas about a year ago or more if I hadn't busted a nut in a day or two I could hardly concentrate on working without wanting to go rub one out.

These days I can go about a week straight without rubbing one out and it hardly crosses my mind. I only wake up with morning wood like once every 10-12 days.

This surprises me quite a bit because my diet has only improved, I workout regularly, and I would say I have relatively low stress levels (at least they haven't increased any in recent times when I used to have a higher sex drive).

-The only thing I've stopped is instead of working out 5-6 days a week I now workout 3-4 days a week and in shorter, but more intense, workout sessions.

-My diet is almost all raw foods, with an abundance of fruits, veggies, nuts, beans, whole grain brown rice, and no gluten products. Plus omega-3's from salmon.

-I drink adequate water a day (about a gallon).

-I get 8 hours of sleep unless I'm going hard in which case I might only get 4-6 hours of sleep for a few days straight but then go back to my regular sleep schedule.

-I DO sit down a lot to work, but I wouldn't think this would be a huge factor on sex drive.

-I eat small portions and generally refrain from overeating

-I eat nothing 2 hours before going to bed

-I do not watch porn nor have I ever had a porn addiction

Do any of you guys have any research, personal experience, or ideas to help me solve this low sex drive problem? I feel like even my game is effected in that I'm good and aggressive but I think it's mostly learned behavior as opposed to full on sex aggression which is what I would prefer.

Any ideas guys??

I'm going to start researching this topic more in depth and try and self fix it. If I cannot then I'm going to start seeing doctors/specialists in this area that might be able to help.

-Rob

 

[Rage]

Hey rob,

I can only at best speculate but will give any ideas I have.

I remember you told me you were working 6 days a week dude; perhaps that has an effect. Again I'm speculating; but from my own experience I found work where you sit around and do busy work and shit for hours and hours on end has a crippling effect on my sex drive. Saw that with sitting in class for too long or having too many classes to too much hw too.

If I had work of my own or work I was passionate about I would have just about no effect on sex drive; but busy work and shit work you have to do can kind of drain you a bit I find. I have to work an internship for a while and the rule I set for myself was to take as little responsibility and busy work and obligation as possible without getting in trouble for it, so that my mind is healthiest and I am least influenced by my work (to as best as I can while still being there). In addition to this I made sure not to talk to regular people any more than need to cause that influencee too (just being around them too much influences you really).

If I were doing the work I do 2 days a week now, instead 5 days a week, it would have the same fucking effect on my test levels. I kind of wonder how guys on the board who work 9 to 5 manage but they have their ways I suppose. That's one thing that comes to mind possibly but might be a lot of other things, if say try and test different things and see what you find.

I'll write more if anything else comes to mind bro good luck

Gem

 

[Mr.Rob]

from my own experience I found work where you sit around and do busy work and shit for hours and hours on end has a crippling effect on my sex drive. Saw that with sitting in class for too long or having too many classes to too much hw too.

Haha I see this as being like a self fulfilling prophecy for you. You go explain to your boss "Look boss man I'd really love to get these reports to you but it's taking a toll on my sex drive. I tell you what I'm going to go lift some weights and fuck this Spanish broad and I'll get back to you. Really can't risk doing some busy work and having it take a toll on the amount of orgasms I have per day, I'm sure you can understand."

Jokes aside a good friend of mine tells me how the reproductive area of your body (your balls) is where a lot of your creativity comes and his theory (similar to yours) is that doing meaningless brain dulling busywork could potentially kill the creative part of your brain and thus sex drive. It sounds far out there but perhaps engaging in more creative activities/games wouldn't hurt my overall vitality.

Thank you Gem for you input as usual my man.

Sex drive fluctuates. I used to worry about mine as well. If you're healthy you're healthy and it's out of you're control.

Good to know, however I'd like to think there is a corresponding reason for my/our sex drives fluctuating that is controllable.

For me, more masturbation actually increases horniness if I'm going through a low sex drive period. Just make yourself masturbate everyday, and check out a little porn without masturbation before going out or going on a date. I find this usually gets me really eager to find a new girl and ready to go. Also, visualize the women in your life naked and think about fucking them all the time. Focus your mind on sex for a while.

Cool I will definitely give this a go. Do you ejaculate everytime as well or just get yourself aroused to the point of ejaculating and hold back (extremely hard thing to do haha).

heathy 22 yr old who spent the first half of this year driving 30 min to go through great lengths to pick up sexy random strangers who he had previously never met, get them turned on as fuck and then drive them 30 min back to his lair for a night kinky sex. No that doesn't really sound like a guy with hormonal or sex drive issues to me. Quite the opposite actually.

Haha thanks man. Yeah I guess your right about that one!

If I find any more interesting research or leads that help me out I'll shoot them over to you as well.

Thanks for the input gents!

-Rob

 

[ProblemSolving]

How much sleep do you usually get? Sleep is probably the biggest lifestyle factor affecting testosterone and sex drive. Try to aim for 7 or more hours of sleep a night. People love to brag about how little sleep they need to function, but we're not trying to just function, we're try to be at our sexual peak, so rest up.

Next, how much free time do you have? The more free time you have, the more you'll think about sex. The less free time you have, the less you'll think about sex, this is true for both males and females. The old saying, "Idle hands are the devil's play thing", is very true.

Lastly, from what you're describing, your diet could be a problem. Raw food diets are almost always low fat and very low calorie, which shuts down testosterone production. I'd start consuming more fats to get hormone production humming again.

 

[ray_zorse]

Subscribed to this thread. I too am interested in any suggestions that come up. The suggestion re. the raw food diet harming testosterone sounds like it might be on the money, although that's not the issue in my case.

I have the feeling it could be mostly mental. Well, if pickup has become a bit of a routine and you're pulling girls home that you aren't totally deadset on, then you could just think "meh" about the whole thing... it could spill over into attitudes like "should I go out tonight?"... Also, if you're very involved with your life mission and you also don't see girls as a scarce resource then maybe you just don't think about them as much. Or, as in my case, being in r/ship and having a lot of sex with the same girl could put a bit of a damper on things, even if you are really into each other. To combat these kinds of issues I would suggest higher risk, higher reward strategies to get a bit more dopamine pumping. Like trying for anal sex, public sex, threesomes... I suppose it might be a bit of a chicken and egg situation, the original complaint seems to be that this isn't happening organically... hmm.

My issue is I don't get fully hard that often and I'm often thinking about other things during sex, but I don't know if this is due to low sex drive or poor mental hygiene. I reckon my sex drive is higher when I'm not tired, but sadly that isn't something I have under good control. I do remember being aggressively horny after 1-2 weeks of regular gym and nofap when I didn't have a girlfriend though. This was a fabulous feeling I'd like to get back.

Ray

 

[Lotus]

low fat and very low calorie, which shuts down testosterone production

This occurred to me as well. Good fats are still important and just from your list it looks like nuts are your main source of fat.

For me, more masturbation actually increases horniness

Same here, if I have sex a lot during the weekend I've been finding I need to masturbate after the fact. This weekend I had more then I ever had in 48 hours and I'm ridiculously horny right now.

 

[TheChased]

For me, more masturbation actually increases horniness

Same here, if I have sex a lot during the weekend I've been finding I need to masturbate after the fact. This weekend I had more then I ever had in 48 hours and I'm ridiculously horny right now.

Seems like we all have found out the same thing! I have never been as horny as I was with my last girlfriend, we had sex almost everyday for 2 years. My thoughts were on sex all the fucking time. Now? Not that much. But the more often I jack off or lay girls, the hornier I get.

And yeah, the more free time I have, the hornier I get too.

 

[Rage]

Hey Rob,

Thought I’d chime back in this one a tiny bit. I’m totally with what the last couple guys above me say. I think they kinda hit the nail on the head bro, and quite possibly your problem is a “don’t use it you lose it” sort of deal.

I wouldn’t have considered this that much before, but after I wrote my earlier reply I spent like 5 days in texas with family, and I didn’t jack off for 5 days.

I have an above average to high sex drive I think but I don’t think its stupidly insane. Usually I’ll do the deed every 2-3 days, and almost never more than once a day. I don’t look at porn often but if I do it is always something vanilla. I never quit the shit cold turkey because I never felt any need to.

Honestly a lot of the time when I do masturbate it’s in large part just to help my sinuses open up before bed as fucking stupid and ridiculous as that sounds hahahaha. I really don’t get much out of it and don’t enjoy wankign or porn much. And several months back when I had a girl to see more regularly I wouldn’t do it at all cause I could just have sex every other day or so.

….

Anyways though, to get back from my tangent: in texas I went like 5 whole days, and usually at home I can’t sleep if I don’t orgasm after 3 or 4 days. My poor balls swelled up to the size of a small cantaloupe hahaha.

I got home from my flight, and the very first thing I did was come home and try and rub one out, and I was astonished to see that my sex drive went away quite a bit.

I think you go into sexual dormancy if you're not doing it at all. And not releasing at least like once or couple times a week (probably more than that the higher your drive is). I did it a couple times and am back to normal now.

Personally I’m for balance in most things and am a bit skeptical of extremes nofap included (just my opinion at least).  

But yeah, still sort of all speculation from me but maybe that’s contributing to your problem dude.

To quote matt mcconaughey from wolf of wall st.

“You jerk off? How many times a day? Those are rookie numbers you gotta pump those numbers up!”



Gem 

 

[Mr.Rob]

Hey guys thanks for the reponses!

I did do a bit of masturbating recently and it did help, however I got sick and that put everything to a halt, however I getting better so I'm going to start touching myself more!! hahaha

Also I will play around with adding some testosterone inducing fats to my diet and note a change.

@ Gem

“You jerk off? How many times a day? Those are rookie numbers you gotta pump those numbers up!”

LOL

Go beast or go home right??

Thanks guys I'll keep yall updated as I learn more and improve.

-Rob

 

[TheChased]

Hey Rob,
I have an above average to high sex drive I think but I don’t think its stupidly insane. Usually I’ll do the deed every 2-3 days, and almost never more than once a day. I don’t look at porn often but if I do it is always something vanilla. I never quit the shit cold turkey because I never felt any need to. 

Fuck, I do it like every day, and maybe more... But I have a project where I'm cutting off porn all together, so I get my sexual imagination back on track as it has diminished. I always thought I had a high sex drive, but you kinda confirmed it.. Just had to say it, because it was a bit interesting for me.

Anyhow, not gonna hijack the post. I hope you find out about this Rob, I'd like to see what your results will be!

-TC

 

[Rage]

Hey Rob,
I have an above average to high sex drive I think but I don’t think its stupidly insane. Usually I’ll do the deed every 2-3 days, and almost never more than once a day. I don’t look at porn often but if I do it is always something vanilla. I never quit the shit cold turkey because I never felt any need to.

Fuck, I do it like every day, and maybe more... But I have a project where I'm cutting off porn all together, so I get my sexual imagination back on track as it has diminished. I always thought I had a high sex drive, but you kinda confirmed it.. Just had to say it, because it was a bit interesting for me.

Anyhow, not gonna hijack the post. I hope you find out about this Rob, I'd like to see what your results will be!

-TC

I think I did it every day often couple times a day for a long time (from 13-20 years old). The last year-ywar and a half was much less, even though my sex drive has gotten higher, because I got to have sex a lot more, and I got a lot more busy with my writing my lifting and other passions/obsessions. Those really are fueled by testosterone, and your sexy energy goes Into that work.

So overall I just was expending more of it (still am) and have good outlets for it, and naturally grew out of and got bored of wanking it all the time. I'll do yet just enough to not go crazy never more than that. If I wanted I could jack off 5 times in a day maybe even more; but now I'll even have days where I'm home alone all day and I won't jack off at all or even think about it at all.

Cause I've gotten used to doing other things with my time that healthily expend my testosterone; once Ina. While just to not go crazy is good enough for me. I'd say finding some good outlets sports or hobbies is perhaps a good move forward to balance and grow out of teenage chronic masturbator phase.

That's my theory on it at least lol

 

[TheChased]

Yeah, I do workout, so I get my testosterone out there too. And I do have sex with girls, but it seems like it's something I just do before I go to sleep. It's not a problem or anything, so I'm not worried, hahah. I have yet to find a girl with the same amount of sexual drive as I have, so yeah!

 

[Lotus]

Just ran into this article today thought I'd link it. It was already mentioned about eating more fats, but that I thought was really interesting were the other vitamins and minerals that are correlated to increased T, and then the squatting.

Just going to pretend I didn't read point number 1 about buying his product.

http://www.returnofkings.com/70824/5-te ... r-sex-life

 

[Mr.Rob]

Noted thanks Lotus

 

[Mr.Rob]

So my question is, are you doing anything else with Creative/Sexual energy, or just find of demotivated in general?

I wouldn't say I find myself too demotivated I work about 12 hours a day and actively meet girls throughout my days.

My work I'm doing is not necessarily super creative but definitely requires technical thinking and strategizing (organizing a charity event in my city + Business School Work).

I have been starting to not like certain parts of myself from not meeting the standards I set for myself which has caused quite a bit of internal conflict and drain on my energy. (mostly letting fear control me more than I would like to admit)

I have drafted a plan and am taking action to fix this situation and get back in line with my personal standards to keep me from beating myself up so much.

I believe this will also curb my sex drive issues on an energetic level.