FR New Years

[Estate]

Hey guys,
So I went to a Black Tie Ball for New Years. I was going with some friends who are taken/not into chatting to girls and had decided I'd go with the flow, it was more about seeing my friends than approaching like a machine.

Anyway, I did a few easy approaches. I say easy because in one way since I didn't feel I was there to "game" anyone, I ended up just grabbing some girls attention if they were nearby and just saying Hi. And it went really well.

So I've been practicing the "being sexy" stuff Chase wrote about. I've been working on my walk my stance, my smile, my voice (I something speak too fast), etc... and I feel like it does a lot for you.
I teased the first girl I met a little but really there was nothing to what I was saying. But after about 2 minutes she seemed really into me. Definitely more to do with body language than anything else.
Weirdly, when the venue is very loud, I find it helps to ask politely get her to repeat herself but remain where you are. It forces her to lean into you to talk but also it gives you a slight power shift.
Anyway, we chatted for about 10 minutes. I was just having fun, she wasn't really anything I would be into but I was glad I felt some of the things I was working on, was improving, she only left as my friend got blown out by her other friends so they wanted her to leave.

There were a few more, if girls gave me a look or a smile or just brushed too close, I'd stop her and say Hi, then ask her name... it worked so well.

But towards the end, I met this other girls. She had actually sat near us earlier in the night but we hadn't spoken then. She and her friend came by us so I stopped and got her name. I hate using ratings but she was definitely 10 to me, totally my type and I'd usually be so shy and nervous around aproaching a girl like that.
Anway, something clicked. I managed to keep my body language strong, made her laugh, led her to the dance floor and back again and I could just see this going so so well. I won't write every last detail but I was happy on pulling so many of Chase's ideas together without tripping over myself. She was into it.

Finally I took her aside and told her to key in her number, we were getting a drink that week... and then she dropped the bomb. "I have a boyfriend".
I didn't really believe her so I stuck in there and felt I'd made progress again. Apparently her friend had told my friends the same, and the BF lives away which is why he wasn't there on NYE.
So anyway, rather than spoil an otherwise good night, we just kept chatting for a while and I let her go. No big deal...

But the things bothering me are this...
Is there any significance to her not telling me she had a boyfriend until the last second when she felt she had to... a lot of times, girls will drop this is 2 mins into a conversation.
Also, friends tend to be protective and I was being fairly dominant in leading this girl around, yet her friend told my friends at some point about the BF but at no point did she try to split us up, or even come near us, which is what I would usually see.

So my takeaways are....
Proud of myself for working on my body language, I could see the difference it made in the interaction.
I was more laid back which made it easier to introduce myself and get talking.
I'm really proud of myself that I felt I approached and, at least, almost, seduced a girl who would be a 10 for me.... a girl I'd shy away from approaching before.
I'm a little iffy on "boyfriend destroyers"... while yes, they might be something to work on here... I'm not entirely sure it's worth it to me, there are plenty of single girls without the drama of that. We'll see.

 

[A Life Loquacious]

Thinking outside the box a little, you might have been on for a same-night seduction somewhere discreet, she just didn't want to date because of said boyfriend? Sometimes they want random sex from some hot guy but not to upset a good provider relationship that they are in.

 

[Estate]

Honestly, I think you may actually be right.
To be honest for logistics reasons a same night lay wasn't on the cards for me, mainly the reason I hadn't intended picking anyone up and just chilling with my friends.

She was cute though so I wanted to go for a number instead but yeah, you might be right, a one night new year thing may have been on the cards had I pushed more for that.

I'm not really experienced with pushing for the same night lay, I probably need to keep this more in mind.

 

[A Life Loquacious]

Yeah it can be a tough one especially if you're out socialising with friends rather than specifically going out to pull. The only time I've managed to get SNLs is at music festivals with camping and I have a tent - mobile logistics, haha.

 

[Chase]

Thinking outside the box a little, you might have been on for a same-night seduction somewhere discreet, she just didn't want to date because of said boyfriend? Sometimes they want random sex from some hot guy but not to upset a good provider relationship that they are in.

Concur - that may have been the case.

Estate, it sounds like she probably saw you talking with the other girl and things going well with her. Preselection is a major attraction switch. The fact that the boyfriend wasn't with her but she was out partying (even if it was NYE) is another clue that makes her more likely to be down for something happening then and there.

She may have been disappointed you went for the number, and not for the pull, and that's why the boyfriend came out then.

It's also well within the realms of possibility that she really was very loyal, and felt that flirting was fine, but once things started getting serious she had to put her walls up, and you would've gotten this same objection had you tried pulling her instead of grabbing her number. Either one is possible.

Chase

 

[Estate]

Thanks Chase,
Yes, I think you are all correct.

2 possibilities were:
- She was ok with flirting but it would eventually come up.
- Or, She was down for something happening right then but not a follow up.

In the moment I went for the number since I didn't have anywhere to take her, I was back home for the holidays. So I went for the number to see if I could see her that week.

It doesn't really matter, it's all experience. I'll know better in future and now that I'm back in the city if I had the same oppertunity I'd be better able to go for the pull.

Many thanks!
E.