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Tramp

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
May 12, 2013
Messages
62
Went to the local Jamba Juice and shopping mall today with the sister, and approached/talked to 5 new girls.


I’ll go through each of them.


Girl 1:

My sister and I were standing in line at the Jamba Juice and oddly, the place started filling with cute girls (definitely need to go back here more). I turned around and saw a cute girl, and then turned back to face forward to consider talking to her. I then mentally said, “Fuck it” and turned around to talk to her:

Me: I like your sweatshirt, really cool graphic on it.
Her: (smiles) Oh, thanks!
Me: Oh, and you have braces! Even better! [since I have braces too]

That was it. Nothing special. I’m just getting used to approaching, so in my mind, I was sexy as hell with this.



Girl 2:

My sister and I were in a store at the mall. There were really no girls in this store, but my sister was looking for a particular item in there, so we browsed. I saw the back of a blonde girl and just went up to talk to her. I just picked up some random thing and asked if it’d be a good present for my sister, and she just said yes. I saw that she was much older than me (she looked about 26), so I didn’t bother with the interaction. I just did my piece and left. Turns out, she was in an employee at the store shopping on her off day. I counted the interaction anyway since I approached her under the thought that she was just a normal girl.


Girl 3:

I saw a cute girl walking the same direction as me, but couldn’t tell if the woman/child combo behind her was her mom or not. Once I saw them separate while walking, I assumed they weren’t together. I walked up to her and started talking. I just used a standard direct opener (“I saw you walking here, and I just thought you were cute”) and she seemed pretty receptive, but ultimately I didn’t push for anything beyond that. I pretty much said my piece, and then walked off (she wasn’t as cute up close as I thought).


Girl 4:

While my sister and I were walking in the halls of the mall, we passed by a really sexy yoga-pants girl. Literally, all I could say was “hi.” That was it. Pretty sweet improvement over not talking to her anyways. She looked at me like I was crazy, so that was entertaining.


Girl 5:

Ended the outing with a bang. My sister and I walked into a store and while we walked on, this cute girl glanced at me, held her gaze and smiled. She had one of those sexy hourglass bodies, with special attention in the ass area. She didn’t work there, because after we passed her she went to the cashier to purchase some things. I pretended to look through the sunglasses rack, which was next to the cashier, and after she made her purchase, I turned and opened her from the side:

Me: Hey, I saw you standing there, and I had to ask, do we know each other? [she honestly looked familiar]
Her: I don’t know. We might?
Me: You just look like someone I used to know, honestly. What’s your name?
Her: [name]
Me: Hi [name], I’m Tramp. (shakes hands) Maybe we know each other from school. Which one do you go to?
Her: [school]
Me: Well I used to go there. We may have run into each other. What year are you?
Her: [Year]
Me: Oh, probably not then haha.
Her: (laughs and smiles)
Me: For what it’s worth though, you are incredibly cute. You have a very unique sense of style.
Her: (smiling) Well, thank you!
Me: What are you up to today?
Her: Well, I’m just shopping with my friend. What about you?
Me: Dealing with my sister all day (I look towards my sister, who is at the end of the store)
Her: (laughs) Oh, dealing with her?
Me: Yeah, I think that’s the proper word to describe the situation (said in a joking voice)
Her: (laughs)
Me: So I’ll just cut right to it, are you single?
Her: Well, um… I’m kind of talking to someone.
Me: Shh, shh, shh… He doesn’t need to know about us.
Her: (laughs)
Me: How about this… How about I take you out to coffee and we can just chat, and… I don’t know if you don’t like me by the end of it, you can slap me or something for asking you out, although I know it won’t come to that.
Her: Well… I can’t go to coffee today, but…
Me: Well, I won’t be able to make it today either, I still got my sister to handle haha, but how about I take down your number and we can schedule it up later?
Her: (laughs) Sure!
Me: Okay, here [hand her phone]
Her: [puts number in phone]
Me: Cool. It was nice meeting you.
Her: It was cool meeting you too!

Not my best interaction, but I still tried. I noticed I asked too many questions in the first part of the interaction, and that “you can slap me or something” part sounds childish. But I still persisted, and she did have a hot body, so I’ll take it.



So this part 1 of my newbie assignment/hybrid assignment I made myself.


What I learned:

1. Girls seem to respond better when I’m in a relaxed vibe, rather than a jumpy one.
2. Honesty and believing in what I am saying works better than canned lines. In my conversation with Girl 5, I didn’t mention what my body language was. I was staring at her in the eyes (at least, until I asked her out. I chickened out of eye contact when I did that) almost the entire time, my voice wasn’t rushed or excited but calm and controlled, and I was tapping into my real attraction for her and was unafraid to express that.
3. A lot of interactions are going to feel weird. Just accept this fact, and forgot about it. It’s going to happen.
 

Mr.Rob

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Jun 16, 2013
Messages
1,897
Tramp cool that you're getting out there and getting it.

You pretty much pointed out all the places you went wrong that I saw skimming through this.

Sounds like you have a good handle on A.A. as well so keep it up dude, you'll start seeing results soon enough.

-Rob
 

Hector Papi Castillo

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Dec 2, 2013
Messages
2,592
Tramp said:
Me: So I’ll just cut right to it, are you single?
Her: Well, um… I’m kind of talking to someone.
Me: Shh, shh, shh… He doesn’t need to know about us.
Her: (laughs)
Me: How about this… How about I take you out to coffee and we can just chat, and… I don’t know if you don’t like me by the end of it, you can slap me or something for asking you out, although I know it won’t come to that.
Her: Well… I can’t go to coffee today, but…
Me: Well, I won’t be able to make it today either, I still got my sister to handle haha, but how about I take down your number and we can schedule it up later?
Her: (laughs) Sure!
Me: Okay, here [hand her phone]
Her: [puts number in phone]
Me: Cool. It was nice meeting you.
Her: It was cool meeting you too!

I'm actually a big fan of this part. You probably could have cut out "I don't know if you don't," and just said "And if I'm a horrible date, you can slap me!"

The next step up is "And if WE don't like each other, we can just go our separate ways into the sunset."

And then, once you get comfortable doing some REALLY direct shit, you could say

- "And if we don't click, we can just have some really hot, steamy, one night stand and then never talk to each other again"

- "And if you turn out to be a stage 5 clinger, I promise I'll let you down easy ;)"

The first is ultra-sexual, obviously. Your fundamentals have to be fucking SOLID when you say this though, or you'll look creepy. But I'm actually a big fan of randomly interjecting super direct sexual comments into conversation now. I have a lot of fun with it. It's about polarizing results, but that's fine - you waste less time.

As for the second one, you chase frame - she has to prove to YOU not to be a clinger (i.e., subtextually, you're awesome enough for her to get attached). Again, if your fundamentals aren't solid here, it's going to sound canned and gamey.

You're doing just fine, but I suggest you let go of the "didn't take it as far as I could because X, Y, Z" excuse. I know you're just starting out, but I'm very big on trial by fire and pushing yourself WAY past your limits. IOnce you get to the intermediate/advanced stages, THEN you can make an excuse because of logistics or social circle, since you KNOW that the risk vs reward on pushing a particular interaction is very imbalanced.


Keep on striving, Tramp!

Anatman
 
the right date makes getting her back home a piece of cake

Tramp

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
May 12, 2013
Messages
62
@Mr.Rob Thanks man. It's cool to get some positive feedback, I appreciate it!


@Anatman Cool to get a response from you man, you're one badass guy. Couldn't get enough of your LR: 15 minute lay post.

Glad you digged the "slap me" part, I was just running my mouth without thinking, and I thought that part came across odd.


And then, once you get comfortable doing some REALLY direct shit, you could say

- "And if we don't click, we can just have some really hot, steamy, one night stand and then never talk to each other again"

- "And if you turn out to be a stage 5 clinger, I promise I'll let you down easy ;)"

THESE for sure. I gotta start saying direct shit like that. I feel I have my fundamentals down pretty good, so I don't think I'll come off as creepy unless my body language is incongruent with the crazy sexual words I'm saying.


As for the second one, you chase frame - she has to prove to YOU not to be a clinger (i.e., subtextually, you're awesome enough for her to get attached). Again, if your fundamentals aren't solid here, it's going to sound canned and gamey.

Shit, I forgot that part of the interaction. I did say (before she gave me her number): "You're not going to text me a 1000 times a night, right?"

Let me know if that's what you're talking about.


You're doing just fine, but I suggest you let go of the "didn't take it as far as I could because X, Y, Z" excuse. I know you're just starting out, but I'm very big on trial by fire and pushing yourself WAY past your limits. Once you get to the intermediate/advanced stages, THEN you can make an excuse because of logistics or social circle, since you KNOW that the risk vs reward on pushing a particular interaction is very imbalanced.

Thanks Anatman, you're words rang in my ears while at my college today. I'll definitely make sure to get rid of my limiting mindset of "didn't take it as far as I could because of X."
 

Hector Papi Castillo

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Dec 2, 2013
Messages
2,592
Tramp said:
And then, once you get comfortable doing some REALLY direct shit, you could say

- "And if we don't click, we can just have some really hot, steamy, one night stand and then never talk to each other again"

- "And if you turn out to be a stage 5 clinger, I promise I'll let you down easy ;)"

THESE for sure. I gotta start saying direct shit like that. I feel I have my fundamentals down pretty good, so I don't think I'll come off as creepy unless my body language is incongruent with the crazy sexual words I'm saying.

Direct is the most fun, especially at my age. Yeah, it somewhat kills "mystery" and "intrigue," but it's so satisfying to lay your cards on the table and have her hook HARD.

Tramp said:
As for the second one, you chase frame - she has to prove to YOU not to be a clinger (i.e., subtextually, you're awesome enough for her to get attached). Again, if your fundamentals aren't solid here, it's going to sound canned and gamey.

Shit, I forgot that part of the interaction. I did say (before she gave me her number): "You're not going to text me a 1000 times a night, right?"

Let me know if that's what you're talking about.

Yep, that's chase framing.

Tramp said:
You're doing just fine, but I suggest you let go of the "didn't take it as far as I could because X, Y, Z" excuse. I know you're just starting out, but I'm very big on trial by fire and pushing yourself WAY past your limits. Once you get to the intermediate/advanced stages, THEN you can make an excuse because of logistics or social circle, since you KNOW that the risk vs reward on pushing a particular interaction is very imbalanced.

Thanks Anatman, you're words rang in my ears while at my college today. I'll definitely make sure to get rid of my limiting mindset of "didn't take it as far as I could because of X."
[/quote]

Good shit, man! And since you're new, I'll tell you what I have to still tell myself every day. Don't worry about fucking up; you will do it A LOT. I straight up suck during many of my interactions. Hell, I didn't cold approach a girl on campus today, despite her giving me VERY obvious approach invitations, because I was with a friend and was trying to consider reputation (people I knew near her), sound (there was a lawn mower next to her), and leaving my friend behind - the first two are semi-valid, but, really, I pussed out.

Don't. Hesitate
. Ball out!

Have fun with this shit, man, you're gonna love it.

Anatman
 
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