nice guy to bad boy - Lushie's journal

[Lushie]

It's time to let go of the past thoughts and beliefs and start being bolder.. and riskier.

I've been inactive from cold approaching for awhile, unfortunately I haven't completed the newbie assignment. Stopped at the sitting down approach, but I've been doing few approaches here and there. So far I've done around 30 approaches, gotten 5 numbers, and landed one date. Very rookie numbers, but looking at the future assignments from the newbie task. I dare say I'm at the level the newbie assignment wanted me to be. So I decided it's time to end the tutorial and start my real journey.

So far I'm testing out direct game more than indirect game. I like talking to people and sometimes being bold and challenging their social skills so I figured maybe direct game is better for me? Plus I enjoy watching girls who appear all Goddess-y/cool suddenly turn shy and into a little girl after a direct opener. I know how some articles and discussions talked about indirect game being the preferred method with many veterans. So perhaps I'll change my mind, I'm still very early in my stage so I'll see what happens.

Today I went out to my go-to mall and told myself that because I've only done two approach from the past two weeks. I needed to get at least 5 approaches before I go home. Started off with trying to build social momentum, saw a well put together old lady. Complimented her shirt, received a warm "oh thank you!". Walked into the store with my mask on, noticed a guy walking by without his mask. Initiated and asked him about mask mandates and if it's required. Apparently he didn't know for sure but saw some people doing it. So why not. Alright starting to warm up, I noticed I'm in need of a restroom but told myself "no, I'm not going to excuse myself to use the restroom instead of approaching. Imma hold onto this pee until I get my first approach". Started walking around, eventually there was this lady at this skincare booth who looked in her mid 30s but attractive. She opened me about a moisturizer sample she had, fortunately for her I've been trying to get into skincare so I was intrigued. She then started chatting with me, I took the chances to warm up my banter skills. Made her guess my age, did over dramatic reactions when she guessed wrong, teased her for thinking I don't know anything about skincare, teased her again for acting all high and mighty whenever she reminds me shes a "professional skincare expert", getting her intrigued about where I'm from which led me to return the question. To which she replied Israel, so I responded with "are all the women from Israel as pretty as you?". She looked away and gave me an "oh stoppp it". She also had an intern who was within my target age range and she was gorgeous. I've noticed her looking at me every now and then, and when I catch her looking I just smiled back. We'll call her HBPink (since she makes another subtle appearance later in the journal where I probably screwed up a little. idk) and she had on a very a cute pink dress that was very obvious and sticking out. Funny enough, this isn't the first time I've seen her and I doubt this is the first time she had seen me. I've been cold approaching at this mall a number of times and passed her before. Anyway the "professional skincare expert" is trying to convince me to buy the product but eventually I told her I'll think about it and we went off.

At this point one of my friend was calling me and while I was on the phone I noticed a cute blonde girl, we'll call her HBBake, and thought to myself "shit I totally feel like approaching her but I'm on the phone with my friend." Honestly it's a weak excuse, I could've just told him to wait and put him on hold. But I didn't, and ended up not approaching her but the PUA Gods blessed me with another opportunity later. But as promised, despite needing to pee I kept it holding until I made my first approach and shortly after I finally did. -- Noticed another cute blonde girl who I've seen earlier but haven't approached. And again, the PUA Gods blessed me with another chance. She was walking towards me and when she was about 7ft away we made eye-contact and I just pre-opened with a wave lol.

Approach #1

Me: hi, can I ask you a question? *smiling warmly*
Her: *a bit puzzled* ok?
Me: you're very cute, what's your name?
Her: Oh heh HBFluff *she was still shaken by my open*
Me: I'm Lushie nice to meet you. *reached out my hand and we shaked*
Her: *still a bit taken back about this approach so I pointed that out*
Me: I'm sorry is this awkward to you?
Her: No I'm just surprised
Me: Okay let me try again.
*literally took a step back, turned around, and turned back towards her and re-opened*
Me: Hi, how are you? I'm Lushie : ) *reached out my hand for another handshake*
Her: *looking a lot brighter and giggling. She took my hand and oh man we held it until the very last minute of this interaction* Hi haha.
Me: What you up to? I see you're shopping, buying some clothes to impress your boyfriend or something?
Her: Haha yeah something like that.
Me: (I'm dumb because I used this line to screen if she was single but then realized I didn't have a backup plan if she wasn't. Came unprepared fk me.) Oh nice, btw can I ask you something, another question.
Her: sure?
Me: Where have you been all my life? (I wanted to test out this line because I like how flirty and ballsy it is)
Her: Haha I mean Idk, in [insert city that's 20mins away]
Me: oh you're from ______
Her: yeah well I mean ----- (totally forgot what she said here)

(At this point, I'm so out of touch and at lost to what to say. Maybe I should've made a comment or some teasing assumption about her and people from that city to spike her emotions. Anyway I decided to prematurely close because when I'm at lost that's my default move. I suggested a coffee date and ofc she gave the bf rejection despite me knowing that ahhhhh. But she still held my hand warmly during the whole time and kept strong eye-contact with me. So that made me feel good, afterwards I told her no worries, take the compliment and it was nice meeting you.)

Alright, fun stuff, now time for the restroom!

Unfortunately around this time, one of my friend cancelled a plan to go to a local fair this evening. I was looking forward to go because I knew it would be a good chance to see a bunch of cute girls. So I was really disappointed and I knew I couldn't approach with this negative mood. So I stepped out the mall and walked until I found an empty bench and just tried to breath slowly and calm myself. What a shame because while I was going to my bench there was a cute girl trailing behind me and I lost the oomph to open her in my mood.

Anyway I regained my composure and went back in pick up mode. Saw a girl walking towards me in a nice black formal dress with grey accent. I opened:

Approach #2

Me: I love your outfit! : D
Her: Oh thank you.
Me: What's your name?
Her: I'm HBTimid (she was pretty shy and timid during the whole interaction lmao)
Me: (I noticed she was started to shift her hands as if she knew we were about to shake hands so I reached out my hand and we shook.) I'm Lushie nice to meet you.

Fuck idr word for word what happened from here but anyway I noticed how timid she was so I tried to pace her emotions. Saying "hey am I making you nervous? I'm sorry" and she felt warmer and started to smile more afterwards. Again I was at lost for what to say so I prematurely closed with a coffee date. She was like thinking hard about it and said "I don't think it's a good time currently with covid". It was a weak objection I think, but I didn't try to bypass it. Eventually she started shifting her body away and mentioned she had to get going or something and I was about to eject until she returned my compliment and said "and I love your outfit too, it looks nice as well" and then mentioned how she was just finishing a job interview. I took this as a sign to continue the conversation. So I stopped myself from leaving and asked her:

Me: oh interview for what?
Her: oh just as a server
Me: ah I see, you know I always admire people who do serving. It takes a lot of patience and I respect that.
Her: oh I mean I just do it cause I need the job. (I tried to qualify her but I guess that was a poor attempt)
Me: (taken aback by her response) ah yeah I see, it is something. But hey it's good that you have something to work on and grind off...
Her: yeah but it was nice meeting you. uhh and sorry
Me: Hey don't worry, I think you look really great and I wanted to share that compliment with you : ) Hope you have a good day.
Her: you too and thanks : )

Anyway continued my path forward, complimented some people's outfit and dress to keep my social momentum. Eventually I posted up at this wall and noticed HBBake walking past me. I hate chasing to approach girls, idk I just never have good experiences but I said fuck it. Jogged lightly behind her and open her from the side, I reminded myself to stop when I do this so the girl would feel incentivized to stop too.

Approach #3

Me: Hey you're real cute and I had to come and say hello
Her: Oh hi
Me: hey what's your name?
Her: HBBake
Me: I'm Lushie *reach out and handshook*
Her: nice to meet you *and slowly she starts to walk away*
I pointed out that she seemed busy and asked if she was in a hurry and she said she had something to do quickly, idr what exactly, so I just let her go and shared that I wanted to give her my compliment.

Anyway more walking around, more missing out on some chances because I wasn't ready. Also I rarely ever turn back to chase a girl from behind, I just feel uncomfortable about that. But hey a good seducer likes challenges so next time I need to challenge myself to turn around and jog after them. So at one point this sales associate at this skincare store saw me walking and we made eye-contact and I just warmly smiled and waved. She opened about the moisturizer sample that I also got from the "Professional skincare expert" lady. So we again talked about the product and she kept asking me and acted all dumbfounded that I wasn't amazed by their peeling gel product that costed over $200. I played along and bantered. In the back I didn't realize but that gorgeous HBPink was there listening to us and looking at me. At some point I was telling the sales associate how another lady was giving me the same sample and said "I mean that girl over there *pointing to HBPink* she knows too she saw me". HBPink looked up and smiled at me and I just look back, smiled and waved. Then I felt ballsy and just said "hey btw you're very beautiful" and she returned a "thank you". So yeah.. I think I messed up here. You know sometimes I think being direct works from my past experiences but it definitely needs to be calibrated which I'm obviously not at the stage where I know when to. Hopefully I'm starting to pick up on it. Up to this point we've only exchanged smiles and eye-contact. So me qualifying her right away especially when I wasn't chatting with her was probably a bad move. And later on, she had her back facing me the whole time. No more peeking at me and making eye-contact like she was doing before. So yeah fuck.

Later on the mall was starting to close down and I couldn't get myself to do two more approaches, so I drove out and went to my favorite downtown. On the drive over I noticed a two set and one of the girl was hot. They were just standing on the sidewalk thinking about something so I told myself I need to approach them when I get out. I got out and started walking back to where they were and luckily they were. But guess what? I didn't approach : ) The girls were at the atm machine and the hotter girl was running the machine. There was another guy in line waiting for them. So all of that in my head told me, fuck this isn't a good time to approach. I decided to walk away. I thought about finding a nearby spot to post up and see if they'll come towards my way but then I thought. Why post up and wait for them when I could go out and find other opportunities? Anyway, fk me because while I was contemplating that, a pretty well dressed girl came around the corner and my mind wasn't made up and so I missed that chance. And as you know, I hate turning around and chasing from the back so I didn't approach.

Anyway eventually I walked around more and from wayyyys away I noticed a lone girl from the back wearing a crop top and short shorts. She looked.... I mean.. the words I want to use will get me locked up because later on I found out she's a minor LOL. Anyways we'll call her HBCourtcase, as I was walking ways behind her I noticed she looked back and saw me. I took my phone out and pretend I was occupied and then I looked up and noticed how much SLOWER she suddenly was walking. I took this as her telling me to hurry my slow ass up. So I got up and welp.. I did what I hated doing but it wasn't so bad. I jogged up behind her, tapped her on her lower back and open her from the side. AND oh... she she's not as cute as I thought, whatever, practice.

Approach #4

Me: Hey, I was just walking back there and I noticed you and thought you were cute. So I had to come and say hello, what's your name? (yeah the most cliche opener but fk it)
Her: oh hey, I'm HBCourtcase
Me: Oh is that spelled with the letters ph or f?
Her: ph
Me: ahh (idr what I said here but eventually she said how she's not as old as I thought she was)
Me: Wait how old are you?
Her: I'm 16
FUUUCCCCCKKKKKKKK uhhhhh okay calm down, let's just keep rolling the tape... wait... maybe not that.... but keep it going PRACTICE PRACTICE.
Me: oh and how old do you think I am?
Her: uhh too old
Me: haha guess (tbh at this point I'm not asking girls out of banter reasons but out of curiosity because I keep getting young numbers)
Her: uhh 22
Me: Wow... you're actually the only one who got it very close. I'm 21
Her: ahh hah... *yeah you're going to jail buddy*
Me: well anyway, I just wanted to share this compliment with you. It was nice meet you tho.
Her: yeahh nice meeting you too
Me: hug?
We both hugged and said our good-byes. That's legal right?

soooooooooo yeah. I need one more approach til I hit my mark, and guess what? I'm still missing out on opportunities and my mind just keeps screwing me over from every position. Okay whatever, last approach is coming up.. and don't get your hopes up because I did and it went down quick. I was waiting at this crosswalk. I looked to my right and from a distance, on the same side of the street as me, there was this beautiful petite brunette walking towards my direction. So I pretended like I was looking around and trying to decided whether I wanted to cross the street or not and pivot my direction and started walking towards her. Here's where I fucked up. As I did this, I was facing my eyes and head towards her general direction and even though I wasn't looking directly at her. She probably assumed I was and at that point she started acting disinterested. I tried to recover but looking to the side and shit. As we got closer about 8ft, I looked up, she quickly looked at me and looked back forward. I opened:

Approach #5

Me: hi *smiling warmly*
Her: (walks away) "sorry"
the end.

Welp.. there's that. Some things I should improve on next time:

- Turning around to chase a girl I missed
- Not qualifying too easily
- Build rapport and not rely only on banters
- Inducing AI

 

[Lushie]

Yesterday was somewhat eventful. First off, I went to a museum with some friends and did one cold approach with this lone girl sitting at a bench. I was sitting with my friends on some stair steps and I was like "okay i gotta do one approach while i'm out here".

Approach #1

Me: hey why you out here by yourself?
Her: (looks up at me then suddenly looks away) No
Me: Your friends ditched you?
Her: no i'm waiting for my parents
Me: oh they left you behind huh
Her: well.. they're right there (points behind me)
Me: (I see her parents coming out and her dad looks like he could be in a a gang. Lmao time to abort! I looked back at her) Ah okay, i had to come and say you're real cute tho, but cya!
Her: (smiles and nods)

Okay pretty lame but whatever. I didn't do any more day game approaches but practiced building social momentum by waving and smiling at people while compliment their outfits. I got some smiles back, some weird looks, and got some where i was straight up ignored. Haha but at the end of the day, it was just self amusement to me. Also saw some cute girls but I didn't approach any because honestly my outfit wasn't all that good. I know i shouldn't worry too much and just approach but I've been putting a lot of emphasis on my appearance and that seems to be dictating my mindset too much when i'm out trying to game.

Okay fast forward to the night. Went out to my local downtown to see if there's any cuties to approach but honestly not really. Just bunch of later 20s early 30s and up hanging out and some kids skate boarding. So moved to my local college town.

I had my skin peeled a little on my finger so I randomly just thought "huh lemme use this as an opener" lmao. some shit like "hey you got a bandage?". It's stupid but i thought fk it why not, i need some social momentum anyway. As i got to the town, boom! there was shit loads of hot girls and they were just walking in and out to the only bar open that night. I was starting to get anxiety and ended up having to maintain composure in my car before i stepped out. I tried doing mediations but idk, i think just going out and feeling the vibe and just pull the trigger tends to get me rolling. so i noticed this cute lone girl who seems to be looking for her friend. she happened to be walking in the same path as me so i was right behind her. Eventually she found her friend, they hugged, act all happily and as i got closer i opened with the bandage opener.

Approach #2

me: hey you got a bandage?
her: huh?
me: i was wondering if you got a bandage
her: oh nah i'm sorry : )
me: alright thanks

i guess it's good enough for social momentum but it's so fucking lame. I should've just gone indirect-direct. but chase mentioned something about making the indirect opener comedic if possible. so idk if i can just go from that lame indirect opener to straight up "btw you're very cute what's your name?". Maybe i should test it.

alright i continued walking around but because of my anxiety to approach ppl in the main pathway with everyone walking. i decided to loop around the town and just go for the quieter path.

I walked around and i noticed a good looking blonde by herself carrying her white bag. she was walking towards the crosswalk stop i was at. but i hesitated and just walked across. as i was walking i thought shit i could've just opened with a "please tell me you got a bandage in that big bag of yours". and transitioned to some light banter if she said no. something like "damn girl you got all that space but no bandage? get rid of all that [insert generic item girls normally keep]" fuck me oh well.

Approach #3
i started walking behind some campus buildings and noticed a girl by herself sitting on some steps. I shouted across with the silly bandage opener and she said she had one in the dorm room that she could get. but honestly i didn't wanna wait for all that especially since she wasn't even cute or good looking, so i declined her request.

me: thank you but that's okay, have a good one
her: okay you too, good luck with your bandage hunt.

but here i decided hmm, i like how receptive she was and let's see if i could make a friend who can link me to possibly parties here on campus cause i have ZERO connections here. so i turned around and asked her if she's bored and wanted to be friends LMAO. she was super chill and cool about it. also i've never smoked before and thought well why not give it a try. so she taught me lol and from there we just chatted. she asked me what i was doing here so i kinda panicked and gave some bs reason about how i had a friend who lived around here and i was waiting for him but he's been taking forever to answer so now i'm just walking around to kill time. she bite but i told myself i needed to redirect this conversation topic quick. so i started deep diving her about her major and being a psychology student. honestly didn't really flirt with her, she wasn't attractive so i didn't feel the desire to. but whenever she brought up SOT like how she's into learning about sexuality and being ukrainian. I would play along and call her naughty and shit, and she took it very well. i made comments about how she's probably hot because she's Ukrainian and asked her shit about how to flirt in Russian since she knows how to speak it too.

anyway some hot girl walked by in her basic t-shirt and shorts outfit that basic white girls walk around in. and i opened her with the bandage thing.

Approach #4

me: excuse me, you got a bandage?
her: no sorry
me: ah that's okay
her: but i probably could use one too, look at this (she pointed at her thighs and there was like some cut on it)
me: (i like how receptive she was so i tried to see if i could get her to keep talking) oh shit what happened?
her: (but she started walking while saying) oh you know----im just like that--haha

hmm.. i wonder if she would've stayed if i wasn't sitting with my new friend here. Anyway the girl i was talking to, I realized i don't have a name for her to be addressed. Let's call her Smoky, she then offered to go back to her dorm and get the bandage. this time i accepted, also funny thing apparently she just moved in that day. so when she walked in the first dorm, she thought she had the right room and realize it was someone else's. lmao so she dipped out and went to the correct dorm. interestingly enough, she also offered me to come inside, but I respectfully declined. WTF why? idk at this point why but i guess my initial instinct was "average girl, nothing impressive > no point in going in". Anyway Smoky came back and we chatted a few more. she talked about frat parties and shit and i told her to invite when she can and she was totally down to do that. we exchanged instagrams earlier so i have a way to connect. anyway i decided it's time to dip so i said my byes and gave her a goodbye hug.

Approach #5
walked back to the streets and noticed two girls near by the side. they're kinda hot, and i tried to induce AI by pretending i'm typing on my phone and looking at my finger that got bruised. as i got closer i noticed the hotter one glanced at me and back away. so as i got closer I opened with the bandage opener and they were like nah sorry. later on i realized one of the chick had a purse so i should've just gone with the light banter about how she got a purse but no bandage. anyways went back to my car and fuck. so many lone girls at this time on the main streets. but too many people and my anxiety is kicking in. but i went home anyway.

things I could've done better:
- going indirect-direct if using an indirect opener
- having a banter line to add to spike emotion
- being more adventurous (shouldve just taken the offer to go into Smoky's dorm)

 

[Lushie]

Sep 1

Back on campus and it's bustling with beautiful girls left and right. i'm attending what's known as the best party school in my state with roughly 20k students. however i'm a commuter and i don't live on campus, so unfortunately i can't take advantage of the beauties 24/7 especially since my home and work is an hour drive away.

anyway, in of my class there's this gorgeous hb9 that sits next to me, we'll call her HBPurdy. We gave small exchanges like the usual "hey what's your name" "are you a ____ student? or just taking this class for something else". after class, she was the first one to leave but held the door for whoever was going to come next but no one went thru the door until i decided to, so i just laughed and took that chance to re-engage once we stepped out. (idk if this is relevant, but i notice how she tends to make some exaggerated sighs or noises. sounds that i catch myself sometimes making when i want someone to talk to me. so i took that as a hint)

me: hey hbpurdy
hbpurdy: hey!
me: so what is it that you do? in terms of filming?
(at this point she stopped and faced towards me, so i took this opportunity to lock-in or at least i think i did it right, hopefully. by going around her to the wall and leaning up against it on my side. while she was standing in open space talking to me)
hbpurdy: *she talks about how she chose this major and whatnot*
honestly idr what was said between her and i but shortly after i noticed her shifting her body slightly to go downstairs and begin leaving. i should've tried to get us to chat a little longer but instead i moved and led her downstairs too.
hbpurdy: so where are you from?
me: where do you think?
hbpurdy: from [the state im in] i suppose? but like which part?
me: i'm from [my city] you know where that is?
*again don't remember much but it was very dry and i really haven't been flirting or getting my vibe right. but i was steady and kept my voice deep. at some point i told her she still hasn't answered my initial question about what she does in filming, like her role. i think i gave off an "authoritative" vibe and she quickly apologize and said she wasn't sure yet and threw the question back at me. i took this chance to tease her by saying "wow i mentioned it in class and you already forgot damn". and she quickly tried to apologize lol. anyway it was pouring outside and i told her i'm gonna wait inside the building hoping she would do the same. but she said she was gonna head out and we said our byes. damn maybe i should've screen her to see if she had time to chat. but i knew since this is a classmate, i was gonna see her again. but i kinda wanna be more direct next time but i keep doubting myself that maybe it won't work. especially since i wasn't in the mood.

i was thinking maybe a good transition line to make a conversation flirtatious is doing a sudden pause in a middle of a conversation. look at the girl and give a random compliment about their style, eyes, hair, or whatever. i was also thinking maybe saying "hmm there's something attractive about you but i can't figure it out." she could respond whatever and i could maybe do a chase frame afterwards and say "maybe it's your perfume (or eyes), is this what you do to attract guys? gosh i need to stay away from you". idk something like that.

i stayed back in the building and did my homework. as i was heading out i noticed this decent looking blonde, we'll call her HBChill lol idk. when we were walking towards each other she made eye contact with me and held it for a bit until i heard a familiar voice. i didn't realize but one of my friend was walking with her, we'll call my friend Rainbow. "they're" a queer and non-binary, but biologically a female. Rainbow is super chill and cool, i talk about girls and chasing them with her/them.

rainbow: hey it's you
me: oh what are you doing here?
rainbow: i have class here
me: *looking at hbchill* so who's your friend here?
hbchill: oh hi i'm hbchill
me: hey i'm lushie *went for a fist bump lol* what were you guys doing out in the rain? y'all had fun taking a showering?
both: oh yeah totally, it was great
anyway we chatted a bit more and i had the random idea of joining their class cause the class was taking a break since it's 3 hours long. so i asked hbchill which seat she sat and i sat right in front of her. as we got more settled in i went for the kill on her.

me: hey i have to say, you're very cute
hbchill: what? (class was loud i guess)
me: *repeated myself*
hbchill: oh thank you (in a nuetral tone)
me: you single?
hbchill: nah unfortunately i have a boyfriend
me: *i did an exaggerated act like my heart was broken. copied it from taysocials*
hbchill: *giggles*
me: okay, well if you guys ever break up, just let me know
hbchill: *laughs* okay (this time she sounded more receptive)

anyway i moved and sat behind rainbow and chatted with another girl behind me. nothing to write about but bantered with her a bit. then randomly asked the professor if i can enrolled in this class and everyone started giggling. unfortunately i was denied but hey it's fun asking silly questions. as i was leaving i wave goodbye to rainbow and i noticed hbchill looking at me, so i wave goodbye to her too.

whatever it is, i need to get back out and approaching again. because i can definitely feel my vibe not being as flirtatious when i'm cold approaching. i read hectors college series and i think the style that suits me is bmoc. since i like being chatty and walking to random people and befriending them. but i need to take that energy and use it for seduction too. i miss so many chances to approach girls while on campus and i can't do that. since i know my time is limited.

 

[Lushie]

Haven't been doing much cold approaching. i have chatted with girls in my class especially HBPurdy and even befriend this super hot 9 who was down to grab lunch and even told me where she worked (at a bar btw) and told me to call her whenever i'm there. but i fucked up when i texted her. did the stupid soft close in the icebreaker. i should make it a priority to always read Skill's posts before i text a new girl or some shit lmao. anyway despite not actively cold approaching, i've been doing some troubleshooting on my openers and reading Mystery Method.

I've heard about the book being mentioned here and there, so i decided it was time to read it. honestly i felt like i was learning a lot and was getting ready to try the techniques. but i couldn't help and notice some conflicting beliefs when contrasted with what i've been taught on girlschase. so i read some articles from girlschase in regards to mystery method and i can see where the two beliefs collide. so in the end, i didn't really finish the book since i've lost motivation to. however i did learn something valuable that i keep hearing in this community. and that's the importance of dhv.

i understand why it's important and how it's suppose to function but i guess i never really prioritize it. one of the ways Mystery suggested that you could dhv was through storytelling. i think that's something i could still learn and work on so i'll need to come up with one or two small stories that i could dhv.

but then i wonder if there's ways i could dhv from the opener. and honestly, i kinda realize how dumb ive been from not using it. if i were to compliment a girls outfit i could be dhv'ing within that same opening line. perhaps something like "hey as an artist and someone who loves fashion, i have to compliment your style, im lushie whats your name?". it draws meaning and depth in my character/background if i were to mention my interest. instead of flat out saying "hey i like your style". in addition it can bait girls into questioning me about what kind of art i make or my fashion taste too.

or maybe if she's not wearing something particularly worth praising but she's cute. i could say "hey as a hopeless romantic i can't help but want to meet a cute girl when i see one. what's your name?" <- i feel like this opener could work since it's direct/ballsy but yet self-deprecating.

anyway less theorizing and more approaching. i need to get that straight.

 

[Lushie]

It's been a really long time since I have ever posted anything on this journal. Last year, school and family emergencies have occurred and had put a lot of my gaming journey on pause. Even tho, I try to get into the field every now and then it hasn't been as fruitful, it's probably because my drive was gone. I hope to restart this journal in hopes to regain that drive and continue where I had left off.

Last winter since it was too cold to do day game, I started to venture into club gaming. It's a very different world to me and tbh was pretty nerve wracking (and still is haha). Although I will say I had some good experiences that also taught me a couple of good lessons. I've gotten a few numbers and girls dancing with me, which for me is a huge first step. Unfortunately, nothing really more tangible than that but at least I made some connections with some bouncers who give me and my wing a free ride.

April 15, 2023

Last night, I went out with a decently big group. It was 7 of us, mainly guys and one girl. Four of us guys were straight, two were gay, and the girl was straight. But the two gay guys and the girl had never been clubbing before and wanted me to show them around. I think in situations where I'm "tested" or pushed to prove myself, I definitely become more bold and I think this night was better for me because of that. Also, side note, I've been inspired by @Beck Bass journals and reports that I started getting some pointers from him. He's been a great help, I gain a lot of insight and knowledge from him. Unfortunately I haven't been disciplined enough to constantly apply those pointers but I wanted to be more intentional tonight. The worst thing I want to do is ask for advice and never take them. Taking one step at at time, the first thing I wanted to focus on is properly positioning my body when I open. I noticed I generally open with my whole body facing forward towards the girl which can be a bit jarring, so I'm trying to open only from the side.

Moving to the field report, we all parked and started walking to the first club, as we're walking there's a FFF 3 set (black ladies but were dressed up and looked fine). Personally they weren't my type but I knew they could be a good catch for my wing who was with me. I gave him a heads up that I was going to open them but when I turned and open the nearest girl. I said "hey" paused waited for her to notice me, "what do you think of my buddy here" and turned to look at my wing who then started looking away and pretending he didn't notice us. LOL okay. I turned back and try to salvage the approach and said "you girls look good have a good night." My wing told me how he doesn't want to me to lob him any girls so I was like okay, that's fair. Tbh its fine because I was using that as a warmup but lets move on.

We walked up across the street and I noticed two girls that had a pretty dress on, I was starting to get a little nervous because they were cute and my type but I went for it. I walked up and opened one of the girl from the side by touching her upper arm. Waited til she looked:

Me: hey I gotta say, I like your style : )
Her: (puzzled look at first but when she finally sucked in what I was saying she lightened up and smiled) oh thank you so much!
Me: (smiled) of course, have a good night.
Her: still looking back at me and smiling.

Tbh... I was treating this as a warmup too but I had a feeling I should've stayed in set and tried to talk to her a bit more. Anyway, we moved into this upper floor small room with a bar and a dance floor. We started dancing around and feeling the vibe. My wing and another one of his guy started to separate from us so I was with the two gay guys, one girl, and one other dude who I'll name Jac. Now Jac surprised me because I actually met him at a bday party before we went out that night. At first he didn't seem like he could pull since he's kinda tall but weak looking and was wearing some regular nike blue t-shirt and jeans. But I love this guy cause he was trying to dance with every girl he saw. He started dancing and positioning himself near three girls, who weren't that attractive but he began to dance with the chubby blonde girl and I noticed one of her friend (although not my type but had nice earrings) I opened her from the side and complimented her earrings which she smiled and was receptive. I didn't try to push any further but went back to my friends. Later on I noticed she stopped dancing and invited her to join us to dance with us which she happily complied. I was trying to use every opportunity I can to engage with people to I build a strong social momentum. Eventually I was dancing and vibing with her and the chubby blonde, who suddenly started getting up on my face asking me a bunch of questions. Tbh I was kinda disgusted but tried to keep a friendly composure, eventually I left her and danced with my friends.

As I was dancing, I noticed other girls glancing at my group and I was glancing at them every now and then. I kept holding myself back because a couple of them would dance near me. I need to be like Jac and just unapologetically dance near them and not be afraid to reach for their hands. A part of me was unconfident because I didn't know how to dance salsa with the girls like Jac (even tho his salsa was very basic). I know that's not always necessary to get a girl interested but I was clouding my judgement with that thought. This was really evident when I noticed one Latina girl (totally my type) started hovering towards me and Jac. She definitely was looking right at me but Jac took her hand and although she looked at him and shake her head no, Jac continued to pull her in and she complied as they began dancing together. Tbh this was a huge eye-opening experience, it made me gain further respect for Jac. I continued standing there and just enjoying them dancing but I definitely noticed her looking at me while she was dancing. My gut was telling me "go grab her hand" but I didn't and just stood. Eventually she pulled away from us. Fuck me. I wonder if girls will dance with your friend even if she doesn't like him in order to encourage you to approach her?

Later on the place started to die down and my friends went to chill at the bar. They noticed that same Latina girl sitting by herself and encouraged me to talked to her. I was hesitant but then said "fuck it, I need to face my fears". So I started to walk up to her. I noticed she looked up and at me and then back down towards her phone. I open next to her on the bar:

Me: hey are you bored or something?
Her: Started speaking in Spanish. But using her gestures and using my limited Spanish skills. I understood that she was waiting for her friends.
Me: No hablas ingles? (I don't think she heard me properly) - queries bailer conmigo?
Her: she continued speaking in Spanish but was clear that she wanted to stay and wait for her friends.
Me: Ah okay no problem. Te ves linda (did a air hand kiss goodbye)

Eventually we left the club and walked over to the next club. We start walking up to different floors and just experiencing the music and vibes. During this time I start to die down a bit, I think moving to different clubs force me to reset and lose a bit of my momentum. Either way as we're dancing I'm just inspired by Jac and seeing how he's approaching and dancing with so many gorgeous girls despite how he looks. This helped me pushed myself too.

We walked around and started dancing at this one main floor. I also had a friend who I met at the gym who texted me that he was going to join me. We'll call him Gymie (just cause I met him at a gym lol, I'm bad at nicknames) Great guy, an Asian guy who lived in England but recently moved to the states. He knew a lot of people in the city and paid me for some drinks. Also this guy loves to dance and I'm realizing that I need more guys like Jac and Gymie since my current wing (we'll call him Ball). His game is different, I wouldn't say it's awful since it works for him. Ball is a tall 6'4 light skin guy with good facial features. Girls literally walk up to him and grab him and would dance with him. All he has to do is just stand still and smile. The problem for me is that's not how I want to spend my night, just standing around with him. So it's a bit troublesome to wing with him and I'm looking to find better wings.

Anyway, back to the field report. As we're dancing I noticed a group of girls maybe like 5 ladies. One of them was a cute asian girl in a white dress wearing some pink ribbon. I caught her glancing at me a couple of times but didn't make a move. Finally I saw her dancing on her own and I took the opportunity to approach her. I didn't do a side approach and went directly facing towards her. I tap her upper arm:

Me: hey, is it your birthday or something? (referencing her outfit)
Her: Oh no, I just like this outfit haha
Me: Oh I see well you look nice, I like the style.
Her: (brings up her ring) Actually I'm celebrating my engagement.
Me: Oh really? wow congratulations! (gave her a high five then I pull her in and gave her a spin)
She was pretty receptive to that but eventually I said my bye.

Idk if I should continued that kind of set but it's good that I got that experience anyway. She had her friends around so I'm sure they probably would've cocked block me if she was actually engaged. That being said, one of her friend was smoking hot and I saw her dancing on her own but I keep holding myself. Eventually I would see guys walk up and dance with her and I start to think "damn that could've been me".

So eventually the club was closing, we all had a great time. We started walking down the stairs holding onto our shoulders and shouting "choo-choo" lol. We were being silly but one blonde girl who was behind actually opened me.

Her: (idk properly but she said something like "hey don't walk too slow I might trip)
Me: oh yeah? did you have too much to drink?
Her: oh no not really
Me: oh well I did so I'm a little intoxicated haha (I stop midway on the steps just to mess with her)
Her: hey!! no don't do that haha
Me: laughed along

We finally made it to the bottom and left the club. I turned around to get a better look at her and I noticed she was one of the tall blonde girls that was decently hot but I never approached cause I feared our height difference would turn her off (She looked 6' and I'm 5'8). But man, seeing how receptive she was kinda made me want to kick myself.

The night ended and we all went out separate ways. Truthfully this was a unsuccessful yet successful night. I had a lot of fun and make a decent amount of attempts to approach. I learned a lot from Jac by just being unapologetic when it comes to approaching girls and dancing with them. I'm going to take these lessons and apply them the next outing. Hopefully I can double the experience I had tonight.

Things I did well:
- Approached 5-6 girls
- Practiced approaching from the side and doing pre-open taps.

Things to improve:
- Not chickening out on dancing with girls/approaching the ones looking at me.
- Staying longer for sets with good reception.

 

[Beck Bass]

I made some connections with some bouncers who give me and my wing a free ride.

Ohh nice, good to see you're putting in the work and that you're back posting. Can't quite read all right now but I'll come back to your post later!

 

[Lushie]

Ohh nice, good to see you're putting in the work and that you're back posting. Can't quite read all right now but I'll come back to your post later!

Yeah no problem! Feel free to critique me about anything, would love to hear any feedback and things I could've pushed myself to do.
Idk if the list of things I need to improve on are hitting the mark or if there's anything I'm missing specifically.

 

[Beck Bass]

I was treating this as a warmup too but I had a feeling I should've stayed in set and tried to talk to her a bit more

Yeah, sometimes warmups just turn into something more and you gotta stay on set a bit a least and see what happens... It's tough because you wanna be social and get momentum by talking to as much people as possible (specially attractive girls), and only hanging to those girls you feel have potential, but, when it happens that early, it can be surprising and catch you off guard. Try to always be prepared to talk a bit more and always assume attraction from the girls.

I wonder if girls will dance with your friend even if she doesn't like him in order to encourage you to approach her?

Girls do random weird things, just like us, they are just, on average, more socially skilled than guys. I think it was just an excuse to keep herself close to you, in case you wanna approach her (always assume girls hovering wanna be approached, even if that sounds a bit cocky, it's better to approach a girl that "doesn't wanna be approached" than to miss out on a girl that really wants you to take the lead and make her night

So it's a bit troublesome to wing with him and I'm looking to find better wings.

Yeah, wings are a bit of a double edged sword. They deff can help you, specially with momentum and just having the will to go out, but also can take away from your actual "gaming experience". I know some of mine, like Ace, that also refuses to approach girls, enfuriate me a little bit lol, I rather go out with at least another guy, so he doesn't get lonely when I lave him to approach some chicks

Overall I think you're doing good work, you just need more experience. Try assuming attraction a bit more and staying more on set and see what results you get, but the most important is to keep on going out, rolling the dice and getting exp. Hoping to read more from you soon!

 

[Lushie]

Friday 4/21/23

This night I want to focus on two things:

- approaching/not chickening out
- assuming attraction

Headed out with my usual wing, Ball, and one of his former basketball teammate (who we pushed to come out with us but he had just sweats and crocs on). Before we head out, we had a couple rounds of wine which got me pretty tipsy.

As we're walking I noticed one of the smaller bars we usually stop at had some pretty girls, I told the guys let's go up there first. I'm trying to work on assuming attraction and putting myself in a position of authority (being able to pick and choose girls instead of feeling as if I need approval). I walked in and positioned my guys in the center of the dance floor then they decided to move and sit in the corner, haha.. Whatever. I gotta learn how to move on my on without needing wings. I joined and sat down with them just to vibe and scope the area a bit. I see three different sets. A two FF set right next to us but are too occupied on their phone. the cuter girl looks like she was tryna take a pic of the streets. I was tryna think of a situation opener for this but my mind ran blank. Another two FF set were dancing in the middle, tall tight dressed girls who seem to be moving but haven't quite reach full excitement. (wonder if they were feeling the area to see if any guy would approach). I get out of the seat and try to dance near them and near others to feel the area. Eventually I walk back to the guys and Ball tells me "hey let's go approach those two". And i'm like alright, I get up and start walking/dancing towards them and i turn around just to see Ball hesitant and smiling as if he was half serious and now isn't anymore. Then I noticed the two girls turn around and smiled at me before they both walk off. Bummer, tbh I feel like I would've approach them myself if it wasn't for the height difference. For ref, im 5'8 and they were like 6'0. I think I get frozen feet when it comes to taller girls. I need to work on that.

Anyway, the third set is where my first approach begins. Mixed group of 5. MMFFF, the hottest one is this slim blondie wearing a very skimpy outfit, totally my type. I waited to see what the dynamic is between the group and I noticed the other two girls seems to be taken by the guys. I take this as a hint that my target may be single.

Approach #1

I start dancing near them and then open blondie from the side while still dancing. Tapped her on the shoulder. She turned.

Me: Hey you guys seem cool let me dance with you guys.
Her: (she responded but my memory is hazy i don't remember.
Me: my friends are being boring so i'll dance with you.

I start dancing with her and then reach out my hands, she was saying no at first but I persisted and eventually she took them.

Her: I'm not good at dancing haha
Me: that's okay, neither am I.
Her: What's your name?
Me: Lushie

I gave her a twirl and then tried a bolder move where I pull both her arms around my neck and grab her waist. We begin grooving side to side. She saids something like wow you're good, but i'm not lol I'm just trying to push the kino.

Me: what's your name?
Her: (answered but idr lol)
Me: Are you from the area?
Her: yeah I'm a professor
Me: Professor? Woah what are you teaching?

Now during this moment, I noticed her friend watching us in disapproval. Her friend is avoiding eye contact with me and just looking at my girl. What was funny was it looked like she wanted to wait for her to stop dancing with me instead of butting in. Eventually my girl notice and slowly pulls away.

Her: I gotta go but it was good meeting you.
Me: no problem, take care.

Approach #2

We walk out of the smaller bar and I'm starting to feel good momentum that I began opening some decently attractive girl with a nice outfit.

Open from the side and tapped her shoulder.

Me: Hey I like your style.
Her: what was that?
Me: I gotta say, you got the best style I've seen all night.
Her: Oh thank you (idr her response)

I asked her what she was up to and said she and her friend was just waiting for another friend. They were tryna figure out what to do next. Side note: I never addressed her friend but she just watched and didn't butt in, how nice of her. I told her yeah I'm just going to stand here and figure out what we're doing too and pointed to my guy friends.

Me: have you been to (club down the street)?
Her: no I haven't
Me: oh it's a nice club, muy divertido. (idk why i started speaking spanish but w/e lol)
Her: are you speaking spanish? haha do you know i'm mexican?
Me: really? como te llamas
Her: (name but i forgot )
Me: are you from the area?
Her: yeah i work for the ______

here we're talking about her job and asking if she's passionate about it. I then I said how i'm also passionate about my work as a filmmaker/videographer. She asked me where i work, i told her about a company that isn't that interesting. I should've maybe said freelancing since that's a little safer/interesting.

Eventually I'm feeling the interaction losing interest. If i could transition to something like dancing with her, I would've tried that here but we were standing out on the street. I tell her hey my friends are waiting for me so I gotta get going. But let me get your number. She told me to do IG since her number isn't working or some shit about having a mexican number. I didn't believe her but I told her ah I see, you're just trying to make sure I'm not some weirdo alright fine i'll play your game. She starts laughing. Anyway got her IG and gently touched her arm while i said goodbye. Im emphasizing that last part just because I want to practice applying more kino in my interactions and just feel comfortable with them.

I'm on great momentum. My guys then start telling me I should get a shorter hair style with a fade. I currently have a korean style bowl cut with bangs and I love it cause it's versatile and looks well with glasses, which I wear most of the time. Sometimes I feel like short hair doesn't work well with glasses and it doesn't give me more flexibility to style it.

Approach #3

Anyway, we're in line for a club and I used this as an opportunity to open a 4 set FFFF infront of us. Now i'm behind the girl and I tapped her shoulder (normally i wouldn't do this because people advise not to approach from behind. But i think tapping helps give them some awareness of you).

Me: hey question, do you think I would look good with a fade?
Her: hm i don't know, maybe.

Suddenly all her friends turn around and started chiming in.

Me: what do you guys think?
Girl 2: Hm nah
Girl 3: Nah I don't think so
Girl 4: Yeah!! I think you'll great!
Me: ayy! there we go we got one approval.

I then turn back to my friends and continued chatting with them. I don't think I wanted to actually push the interaction with any of the girls since they were all okay looking.

Eventually Ball showed me a pic of a style and
he told me to ask the girls again. I'm hesitant cause i don't really think it's worth re-engaging just over a picture. But i try it anyway because i don't want to chicken out. I re-engage the same girl with a tap and showed her the pic. I asked if this would look good on me and she just gave me a cold "i don't know." and turned around. I looked at Ball and he's giving me this look like "c'mon man". Lol Im thinking I shouldn't listen to him anymore but it was worth testing anyway.

Approach #4

We get into the club and we're just tryna vibe. My boys move to the corner of the club and are just standing there not dancing. I'm moving around tryna dance and vibe but it's tough when you're on your own. I try to move closer to the crowd and I see two girls walking to the bathroom. One of them had a nice dress.

Me: hey I love your style
Her: (walking away) thank you (politely)

Approach #5

I moved to the bar and I see a girl by herself with a pretty outfit. Walk up from the side

Me: Hey
Her: (turns and smiles gleefully)
Me: I gotta say you got the coolest style in this whole club.

Before she could respond, some guy comes in and saids something to her. I think he was one of the staffs/promoter. And she walks away.

Bummer, oh well.

I gotta say, something I notice about my openers is my default go-to when i'm blank is "hey I like your style" or something about that. Tbh i don't think it's the best opener or anything but it's the one that I tends to have the best success for me.

I do want to eventually experiment with curiosity baits. Like "hey do you know who you look like?" > "You look like someone who's pretty artistic/creative" > "are you an artist or something?" > and see where it goes from there.

Anyway our third guy, the one wearing sweats and crocs decided that he wants to just chill in the car. I took this chance to say let's just leave because I have to wake up early the next morning anyway. So that ends the night. Some notes to take but I also want to reconsider drinking when going out. I don't want to use alcohol as a crutch.

Things I did well:

• dancing approached a girl that was totally my type not a 10 but definitely a 9.
• applied stronger kino
• stayed longer in interactions
• didn't hesitate too long when thinking about an approach except for the first two FF sets.

Things I need to improve on.

• I still chickened out on the two girls dancing in the middle. The height difference is affecting me psychologically even tho I can recall times where taller girls have liked me.
• Dancing on my own or moving solo around the dance floor.
• Approach more, there's not enough samples to work with for stronger results.

 

[Lushie]

Saturday 4/23/23

One thing I wanted to focus on this night:
- Approach, Approach, Approach

And that's exactly what happened and it turned into one of my best nights thus far. I was approaching as much as I can to the point where I lost count. So I'll highlight the approaches that I think are worth noting.

Before we headed out, I started with some visualization and meditation. I got this advice from listening to the girls chase podcast on one of Alek's episodes. Riding from yesterday's momentum I had a lingering feeling that tonight was going to be special, not by chance but by the sheer desire to improve and improve.

We went up to our usual warm up bar (the one I mentioned from my previous journal on the first approach) we'll call it SaH for now. I noticed there was a lot more people compared to the previous night, so I was scoping the area. My wing, Ball, said he wanted to use the rest room and the line was LOOONG AF but we got in line anyway. I didn't wanna go solo onto the dance floor yet.

Approach #1

As we're waiting in the line, there was a girl that walked up and asked if we were in line, I told her yes and then took this opportunity to open her.

Me: Hey, are you from around here?
Her: Oh no
Me: Ah okay, I was gonna ask if you know any good clubs here.
Her: Oh yeah no sorry, I'm from Kentucky.
Me: Kentucky?! Woah what are you doing all the way here (we're in the east coast)?
Her: Haha I'm here for my friends bachelors party. Where are you from??

From here I'm telling here I'm from around the area and I was teasing her saying she didn't seem much of a clubbing type and she was eating it up while bouncing back the same question towards me. I asked her which ones are her friends and she showed me some videos of her friends on her phone, it was a mixed group but relatively large. I used this as an opportunity to try and join their group once we're out of the line. As she's explaining one of her guy friends came across, harmless looking fella but I had a feeling he was trying to rescue her, but she disarmed him. So he walked past smiled and I dapped him up before he left. Afterwards, I asked if she's going to be dancing and she replied yeah, said I'll join her later. She smiled and she left.

While I was talking to her I noticed some girls around looking at me and catching their glances. Pre-selection was taking into effect.

Approach #2

While we were in line, I noticed this one girl by herself occasionally glancing back at me and my wing. So once I found a good opportunity, I tapped her shoulder.

Me: Hey how long have you been waiting?
Her: For fucking years (angrily)

Woah, she seemed pretty animated. So I just lay back and was ready to eject. I think she noticed this and said something like she's been waiting for a some time. So I re-opened using the "are you from around here?" She said she was and she bounced the question back at me. We had some back and fourth convo and then she asked me how old I thought she looked. I tap my wing and we begin trying to guess her age. Then she said 27 (she honestly looked like mid 30s but I'll play along) and then she asked me how old we were. I told her to guess and she guessed 27 (LOOL that's the oldest I've ever heard so at this point I think she's faking) I told her close and said I was 25 (I'm 23 but I wanted to make it some what close to her but not too young). Then she guessed my wing to be 27 too, lol this lady. Eventually the convo died down or nothing interesting was said afterwards.

Approach #3

Again we're still in line and I turned to see this asian girl, bookworm type, just dancing and trying to vibe. Suddenly there was this other girl that came up and was dancing with her. So I took this opportunity to tap the other girl and started dancing together with them. We started talking and tbh I have no fking idea what I said in the beginning and eventually I asked what her name was:

Me: what's your name?
HBWashedRus: _______ (sounded very unique)
Me: woah, what is that from??
HBWashedRus: It's Russian!
Me: wait what you're Russian?
HBWashedRus: haha yeah but I don't speak any at all. What about you? Where are you from? Are you Chinese?!

She starts guessing and I used this to tease her a bit saying she's racist for thinking all of that. I bounced it back to her and we're just bantering about what race we look like. At this point I noticed she's a bit tipsy. I see her drink and take it from her and start drinking it. She's looking at me in shock and starts laughing. Eventually she pulled me and the other asian girl together and said something random like:

HBWashedRus: hey lets do a role play here, (looking at the asian girl) you're gonna pretend like he's (pointing at me) is your husband and we're here just partying.
Me: (tbh I didn't here shit but was like yeah! and start dancing)

We go back to chatting and dancing, but at some point the other girl left and I didn't realize this. I pointed this out to her saying her friend left and she was like:

HBWashedRus: oh that's not my friend! I don't know her.
Me: Oh really?
HBWashedRus: You should know cause that's your wife!
Me: lol so you came in and took me away. Did you just caused an affair?
HBWashedRus: hahah yeah!! You're my husband now!!

Something I forgot to mention but every time we talk, her face is always close to mine. I felt the tension a bit despite us just giggling and bantering. I feel like I could've kissed her and I was debating it. Tbh she's not super hot but not ugly either but I decide against it since she seemed a bit drunk. Here's something funny tho, eventually I asked her where her friends and she mentioned she came with a guy but he's weird. I'm like oh where is he? I'm fking looking around in the back of the room to find him and she's like "he's right here". I look down and see this guy standing right by us THE WHOLE TIME LOLL. Like bro, say something don't just stand there. Eventually he introduced himself. And I told her hey lemme get your number and she types it in. Then said sweet if you're dancing I'll come and join you later.

Approach #4

So while we're STILL IN LINE LOL, I noticed a 3 set MFF, where one of the girl was just dancing on her own. Asian petite girl, we'll call her HBKorean, she's alright looking but I wanted to take this opportunity to warm up. So I step to her side and reached out my hand. She took it and I have her a twirl and then we started dancing together. I opened her asking if she's Chinese and then guessed Korean later. When I found out she's Korean I said hello to her in Korean with a bow and she was eating it up. Eventually I see her other friend kinda looking suspicious and pulled her back a bit. So I took this chance to disengage. After awhile when I see them break up and she's dancing alone I come over and dance with her again. I saw her drink and took a sip at it, she's looking at me kinda upset but laughed about it. AGAIN her friend came in and I said "hey I'm sorry for taking your friend, I just think she's cute". And she's like "yeah she's really cute!" so now she seems more accepting of me. So I dance a bit with them before I disengaged. Again she wasn't my type but I wanted to warm up anyway.

Approach #5

At this point you can guess what the first sentence is.... Again while in line.. I see two girls cut infront of us but I ignored it. Then I caught one of them turning back stealing a glance at me. We'll call her HBDenim, so I waited and tapped her on the shoulder.

Me: hey, I love your style
HBDenim: *lights up and smile* oh thank you
Me: yeah you got this sort of artist vibe, you do anything creative?
HBDenim: yeah! I like filming!
Me: *NOW I LIGHT UP* WHAT! I love filming too! I'm a videographer / film student.

So we talk back and forth about our passion and she's lighting up like a bulb. While I'm talking to her I'm grabbing both of her hands while saying stuff like "that's crazy you gotta continue that project" blah blah. She's telling me she has a bunch of projects but never completes them. I hold her hands again and say listen you gotta finish them and complete your dream and other shit like that. And she's just eating it all up. She told me she likes to make film projects about relationships.

Me: wait don't tell me you're one of those types that gives all the relationship advice but is single.
HBDenim: hahah yeah that's exactly me!
Me: woah lmao! listen if you're single how about you and I get together. What's your number?
HBDenim: oh I would love to but I'm not from here. I'm just visiting

She said she was from south Caroline and I told her I was flying up to North Carolina for work and that she could come meet me. She laughed and said something but I forgot. Anyway I asked her about her friends and she was showing me the girl next to her, which honestly was cuter, but I hesitated to open idk why. I told her hey if you're going to be dancing I'll come and see you guys. And disengaged.

So eventually after 100 years, we finally got to the bathroom and it's a single toilet. So once we got our rest, my wing is like lets go to a different club. And I'm like bro, I just seeded like 3 different groups to join so lets just go check them out. He was hesitant saying stuff like "but are they high quality tho, I don't wanna dance with mids" and I'm just rolling my eyes. I told him okay you can stay here and I'll go dance on my own. But eventually he gave in. While we're taking HBDenim comes over to the bar with her friends and she takes the chair that I was standing next too. Then she jolts out of her seat and loooks at the chair.

Me: Woah is this how you say hello again?
HBDenim: haha wait what is that? (pointing at a wet spot on the chair. It just looked like alcohol spill)
Me: Oh no did you pee yourself?!

Her friend at the bar started talking to her and HBDenim turned away from me. I don't think she heard me but it's whatever, we moved to the dance floor.

Here I'm trying to find the other girls I said hello to but I couldn't. So now I'm getting a bit of lost cause I was hoping to join one, so I try to start vibing with my guy on the dance floor. Then I see HBKorean with her friend start dancing in the center. I took this chance to start dancing with HBKorean but then her friend walks away and ushers her to follow. Wow bummer. Anyway I turned to Ball and said yeah lets get out of here.

For a warmup bar, Sah was great. Had five approaches down. And there were a good handful of girls that would walk up to me asking me if bathroom questions and if we were in line. I take these as IOIs and I should've grabbed onto one of them because some of the girls were hot but Idk how to reframe/open from those general questions. Also there were other hot girls that were near us in line that I should've opened but they were usually with a guy and I didn't wanna mess with mixed groups unless I feel like the guy is some loser.

We walked over to the next club and started waiting in line. While in line some group of girls gather behind my wing.

Approach #6

I turned and asked the girl directly behind us, she looked young, somewhere like 18 but was kinda cute.

Me: hey are you from around here?
HBAlt: yeah how about you?
Me: yeah I'm a local too, but do you know what club that is? (pointing to some club across the street)
HBAlt: No I have no idea.
Me: Ah but have you been to this one? (the one we're going too?)
HBAlt yeah

honestly it was a weak interaction, I just said "this club is nice with good music". LOL what a terrible convo. Anyway, I disengaged.

while we're waiting some group of black girls came over and started warning us how awful the club was and that it was crowded, too many young people, and blah blah.

I opened one of the girl and asked about the music and we just started vibing. We're chatting with one girl and the other girls were chatting with the others behind us. My wing later warns me saying all those girls behind were 18. Tbh it doesn't really bother me if they are.

While we're waiting my wing said lets go check if our bouncer friend is there to let us in so I went over to check and he was gone. Then when I came back, HBAlt just came over and wrapped her arms around my wing and I and asked:

HBAlt: Okay guys serious question, is this club good?
Me: Nah it's terrible (jokingly but serious)
HBAlt: (pulls back) alright thanks
Me: but yeah it's okay

and we just disengaged.

Approach #7

There was a mixed group infant of us MFFFF, also a young looking group. One of the girl was my type so I just tap her.

Me: hey how long have you guys been waiting in line?
Her: uhhh turns to her friend
Her friend: mumbling some shit I do not understand.
Me: So a long time..

Then her and her friend just turned around and I'm like.... uh okay weird.

We get inside the club and it's somewhat jam packed. The music isn't my type, very EDM pop but then it turned into hiphop and started getting better.

Approach #8

While I'm standing I noticed a young blonde walk over and looked at me before she positioned by a pillar. She starts going on her phone and running through snapchat. I'm like "there's no way she's waiting for someone". So I took went over and tap her shoulder.

Me: hey I like your style
Her: what?
Me: Lean closer to repeat but so did she and we both hit our head a bit. *facepalm* embarrassing. I said I like your style.
Her: oh thank you

then walks away to her friends.

UGHH I think I fucked that up with our head bump thing.

Anyway, we're just checking the area out and spotting potential targets but I'm kinda lost cause people weren't dancing like one-on-one type stuff it was more like jumping up and down, college party type of dance. I don't know how to calibrate to that, honestly maybe I'm just overthinking myself. But we just stood around until. I said yeah let's just go.

We moved to another club and as we're walking up the stairs I noticed a young girls with PERFECT BODY, like literally nice big ass and perky tits with a cute artsy outfit. I already knew what the opening was going to be. But I didn't want to approach on the stair or while we're walking. So I waited to see if she would stop before I dance with her. Eventually I lost her in the crowd and then saw her again walking back down with her friend. We'll call her HBArtsy because I made a mental note to find her and from her vibe I got a feeling I knew which floor she would be on.

So we start scouting the area to find other targets and I noticed this beautiful babe. She was in a mixed MMFF group but the guy next to her gave off "friend" vibes. He wasn't dancing with her, he wasn't touching her, he wasn't being intimate, he wasn't talking to her, and he didn't seem loose. I wanted to try and approach her and take a gamble that they're not together but she was on the opposite side of the club and there were too many people dancing in-between. I decided to give up and just wait for another opportunity.

Eventually my wing and I decided to try the other floors, I told him hey let's go to the floor I think HBArtsy would be. Lo and behold there she was with her friend dancing. As I walk in I'm just trying to be natural and walk but I caught her and her friend looking at me.

Approach #9 - The Best One.

I slowly walked up to the set, I was debating whether to go straight up or try to dance near them. But the space wasn't too crowded to blend in so I decided to just walk up to them.

Me: Hey I like your style
HBArtsy: Oh thank you : )
Me: You have this artistic vibe about you, do you do something creative?
HBArtsy: Yeah! I actually do ____ (totally forgot)
Me: Oh yeah? That's awesome! I'm an artist myself
HBArtsy: Oh yeah? Do you have anything to show?
Me: Yeah I have some photos

I pull out my phone and while doing this I open her friend.

Me: Hey sorry I don't mean to ignore you but what's your name?
Friend: Oh no that's okay! I'm ____ (i swear i need to remember girls names cuz i keep forgetting)
Me: Oh sweet Im Lushie (turn to HBArtsy) What's your name?
HBArtsy: HBArtsy
Me: Here's some drawings I made (showed her my IG art page)
HBArtsy: omg these are so good blah blah blah are you studying art?

So she deep dives me here about what I do and I told her I'm a filmmaker and she lit up. Also, while I'm talking to her I'm constantly palming the small area of her back just to apply kino. She asked me what kind of projects I like to do and I said I wanted to create work that encourages people. I don't want to make something for the sake of entertainment and blah blah. She is nodding and listening to it all attentively. Eventually we began dancing and I take her hand to twirl her. I also twirl her friend so I don't leave her out. I go back to my girl and we're just holding hands while dancing. NOW here is where I'm kinda unconfident. Like I can confidently dance in an island but while holding hands with a girl, it's uncharted territory for me. I twirl her around with her back infront of me, and I can just feel her grinding on me and it's amazing but we're not perfectly in tune. We keep going at it until she begins moving around. And she's moving around gracefully and I'm just in awe of her figure and the way she's in tune to the music. I made some comments saying wow you're so good, I'm awful at dancing. She's like oh no youre doing fine. So we're just dancing and twirling each other just trying to have fun.

Eventually we're doing this for minutes on end and I'm trying to think what's my next move. Then I realized.. wait I don't really have a way to pull her since I don't live on my own, or close enough. I also have to drive my wing back home so the only move left was to get her number and head off. So I did just that, saying that I should prob head out since my wing is waiting for me (he's just cooling on his own standing there). She's understanding of this and I grabbed her number then left.

Though there's something I'm confused about and want to hear opinions. I wanted to force stronger kino while we were dancing. So I would pull her in and wrapped her arms around my neck while I grabbed her waist. But she would always pull back after a few seconds and just return to a safer distance. I've tried this three times and the same thing happens. I'm thinking, okay she likes me enough to dance with me forever but not enough to get really close. Though we've gotten pretty close when we're not holding hands but idk much moves to make stronger kino without grabbing her. Anyway, I take this as a hint that she's not fully committed to me or not turned on enough. I wonder if it's because I'm not savvy enough with my dancing. Curious to hear your thoughts on this @Beck Bass or even @Skills.

Anyway, we head down to look for more girls. We walked down another floor and spot some sets. There's a young group of 4 FFFF set dancing and two older FF set by the bar talking to each other. I decided to go for the two FF set.

Approach #10

Walk up to the girls, whole body facing them (I didn't do any side approaches probably because I'm just feeling so good that I wanna just walk up directly). I open them but they were in the middle of laughing hysterically so I kinda had to stand there until they got their composure.

Me: hey, I gotta say you guys got the most stylish look in the whole club.
Them: Oh thank you
Me: (Turning to the girl on the left, who seemed more receptive, they look hispanic) Where are you from?
Girl 1: I'm from Miami ; )
Me: Oh really? What brings you all the way here?
Girl 1: I'm here to visit my sister
Me: (pointing to the other girl) Oh her? That's sweet. (turning back to girl 1) Como te llamas?
Girl 1: ______ (name here) and she's _______

Now here's whats interesting, Girl 2 kinda looks away when I turn to her. So I sensed she was not really feeling me. Her sister is more receptive but I'm kinda thinking okay I guess I'll have to disengage.

Me: well it was good seeing you guys have a good night : )

Even though that interaction was barely fruitful, it felt good to just get the approach. Those girls seem like in their late 20s so it was fun and interesting being a younger guy approaching them while all the other older men just turned and watched me.

Anyway so the night ends here and this is where I bring up my texting. I honestly feel dissatisfied when I have to resort to getting numbers because they never respond to my first responses. And this happened when I texted HBWashedRus and HBArtsy.

For HBWashedRus I texted: "hey it's Lushie ; )"
For HBArtsy: hey it's Lushie, gotta say you got the best moves I've seen all night.

I know it's possible to get numbers and actually create some lead from them but I'm at lost as to how. I've read other journals and reports where most guys just avoid getting digits and look for the laid. But for me to do that I need a quick pull logistic that doesn't involve my house. I have my car but then I'll need to find a discreet location first.

Anyway here are my takeaway notes.

Things I did well on:

- Approaching a lot. The most approaches I've done thus far
- Tested the "you seem artistic, do you do something creative?" line and it worked wonders. The girls were engaged.
- Danced with 4-5 girls
- Tried applying stronger kino during dances. May not have been successful but at least I've attempted it.
- Approached a hottie, even made a mental note to find her later, and successfully did.
- Got 2 numbers (could've gotten 3 but HBDenim was from out of town)

Things I think I need to improve on:

- being more confident with my dancing, maybe practicing being more in tune.
- using stronger sexual tension. I feel like a lot of my approaches the girls were hooked enough to chat but they weren't turned on.
- opening girls who ask "indirect questions", I need to find a way to jump on those chances.
- working on logistics for ways to pull so I don't have to resort on number closing.

 

[Skills]

About the dance scenario, she was not comfortable with you to let her micro escalate the pull back was a rejection to your escalation

 

[Beck Bass]

using stronger sexual tension. I feel like a lot of my approaches the girls were hooked enough to chat but they weren't turned on.

Yeah, I feel it's mostly down to this... Honestly it's very tough getting reliable numbers from night game, most girls just won't feel it afterwards, they have this bullshit disconnect that the guys from the night aren't "boyfriend quality" (much like many men have towards women lol), plus they might be drunk and whatnot, so they rarely answer, and if they do, it mostly doesn't turn into much.

Logistics need to be addressed, but in the meantime, you can try and escalate as far as you can go on the club itself, maybe even try some bathroom sex... Though err on the side of safety, if you like the club. I've heard stories of people that got banned from places for going too far.
You can also just try pulling her out of the club and seeing where it goes, maybe you find some dark alley or come up with some love hotel nearby or something... Try to do some research if you're going to the same places reliably, to have some sort of plan.

I think you're doing great progress, sometimes those night you go out on a row can really build your momentum and lead to a great improvement on your results.

I wonder if it's because I'm not savvy enough with my dancing.

It could be many things. If she's resisting lightly, just pull back a bit and try again later, rinse and repeat. If it's a bigger "no", just stop all together. Overall I would just try and keep strong eye contact and be kinda like "I really wanna bang you, but, you know, there's other hot girls here... let's see if you can handle it" kinda of vibe.
Don't get too attached on escalating kino linearly and literally, the most important part is for you and her be confortable physically with each other, that's the basic prerequisite to get intimate, and then the rest is you turning her on. So if you have some basic level of touch established, you can just really amp up the eye contact and the teasing and sensual dancing or whatever lol, different girls respond to different things

 

[Lushie]

Friday - April 28, 2023

After reading some feedbacks thanks to Skills and Beck Bass and articles relating to dance floor seduction. I did some thinking and here are the list of things I want to focus on tonight.

- Finding discreet locations to pull to near the club. I have a car so I'll see what are some good spots to park too.
- Being comfortable with going solo/dancing solo on the dance floor to create attraction.
- Building strong sexual tension using eye-contact. I need to hold eye-contact until the girl looks away while being emotionless.
- Being more confident/leading when dancing with girls

This may be too much to think on one night, so I'll pick these to prioritize: The first one is going solo, I don't want to keep relying on a friend to join me and I also want to be self sufficient whenever my wing isn't winging ( lol ). After reading the article: Dance Floor Seduction I want to build the comfort to dance solo and create that aura that will lure girls into me. The second: finding proper logistics, sneaky alley ways or other discreet locations. I also have a car and will try to look for parking spots that seem discreet too.

So I head out to my first usual spot SaH and park by the bar. I'm positioning myself at the end of the room just gauging the vibe and seeing what's room like. A lot of people are present but not that many attractive girls. I later found out these were a bunch of geeks just partying. Being alone is pretty tough, the anxiety starts kicking in but I'm constantly telling myself "they're nothing wrong with being yourself. OWN IT". So I start walking towards the dance floor with this large group of people dancing. I spot one guy just chilling outside of the circle and I asked him if there's some kind of bachelors partying going on. Turns out he's not part of the group and came out alone. He was invited to dance with them but he wanted to just chill for a bit. So I'm like cool, I'll chill/dance with him while I try to build that solo dance floor aura.

I was just tryna dance and build attraction but he keeps stopping me to ask me questions and tell me random stuff, he claim he's a player lol. I mean it's chill and all but I'm not here to game a guy I'm here to game girls. Anyway, at some point there was a mixed set FFFM that started dancing and merging near a spot that opened up next to me. I noticed a HB7 tried to sneak a look at me before I caught her and she looked away. We'll call her HBSwirly, eventually when the guy came over he kinda started making dancing gestures and we started vibing together. I told him I came alone and asked if I could join his group. He was totally cool and make room for me. I started dancing with the girls and introduced myself to the closet one who was some fat chick but gotta merge myself somehow.

Approach #1

Eventually they settled down and HBSwirly appeared next to me so I tapped her and reached out my hand. She smiled and took it, I twirl her first and then twirl myself and started dancing with her. I asked her if she's good at dancing and she said he practiced it for 13 years but she's not very good, okay then lets see how I do. I want to focus on being in tune with a girl while we're dancing but this one kept doing funky hip movements and being out of tune with me. So I slowed down my movement and kinda signaled her to take it slower. She eventually lined up with me and then we lost sync again. I try to mix it up by twirling her again and then pulling her hands onto my shoulder to micro escalate. She was somewhat compliant with the escalation, her body kinda felt like it wasn't familiar/ready yet. I'm trying to twirl her and again we're not perfectly in tune. So eventually, one of her friend interrupted her and then she had to step out. I started dancing on my own but still positioned next to her, she noticed and looked back apologizing for leaving me behind but kept talking to her friend. Eventually I felt like a loser just standing here waiting for her. So I moved to the bar to get a drink.

Something I learned here is when the girl stops dancing with me to talk to her friend, I probably shouldn't stay there and just move on. Perhaps I can engage them later. So I'll experiment with this.

So I grab my water and started scanning the area more. I moved on to dance on my own and definitely noticed some girls looking at me. I saw a cute girl with blonde bangs but she had this tall guy next to her. I assumed that's her boyfriend but eventually I saw her talking to some other guy. Damn I should've opened her sooner. Anyway, I spot HBSwirly again and did a hip bump onto her. I reached out my hand to dance with her, she smiled but was a bit hesitant but eventually complied. But while we're dancing I tried to twirl her and I almost got her knocked into some random guy and after she had disengaged. Fuck me, I need to be more aware of the space before I tried to do twirls or certain dance moves. It definitely kills the vibe.

Approach #2

Anyway, I walk off to dance and I spot an empty space but then two girls came over and shared the spot with me. I know they were eyeing it before me so this wasn't a approach invitation. But I noticed the shorter girl starting to dance on her own and I turn and reached out my hand. She was kinda uncertain but shrugged and said "yeah sure why not". And we started dancing, I twirled her and twirled myself. I think I like this combo really nice and I get good reception. She started asking me questions about myself and if I was part of the college group that they were with and blah blah. Nothing interesting, this girl wasn't my type but it was just a warm up. I tried to micro escalate with pulling her arms on my shoulders but she was too short to reach me lol. She was like 4'8in. Anyway, she excused herself to get water and I exited.

Approach #3

So I'm sitting by myself just grooving to the music and I spot three girls just talking to each other and dancing. One of them was this Latina, we'll call her HBMexiFilipina, she had an above average face but a sexy body, as to be expected from Latinas ; ) I remember seeing her eyeing me a couple of times but I wasn't able to make a move because there were other dudes near her. So finally she was here with just her girl friends. Though I kinda hesitated at first because I was tryna to decide whether they were having a serious discussion or not. I read to avoid approaching girls that looked really engaged in a conversation. But when I saw them starting to just dance, I was like fuck it lets go.

I reached out my hand, she grabbed it and I gave her a twirl follow by me twirling. I noticed she was holding her jacket on her other hand, so I grabbed it and set it apart and took both her hands. We started dancing again, I twirled her again. Then she told me she's not very good at dancing with others. I told her its okay neither am I. She asked me if I was from around the area and other get-to-know-you questions. I found out she's part Mexican and Filipina so I started speaking some Spanish to her while we're dancing. I turned her around and start letting her grind on me while I placed my hands her on hips. She had such a great body jeeeeez. And unlike my previous attempt with HBArtsy, I was able to be in tune with HBMexiFilipina and our body was working well together. But as things were getting juicy one her friend interrupted me and said "hey I'm sorry but could we borrow our friend". lol I kinda didn't respond but just looked at her. Her friend kinda pulled HBMexiFilipina to their group and it was delightful to see my girl kinda resisting her friend. Her body was shifting to her friends but her hands were still wrapped around me. But eventually she gave in. Learning from the first approach, I decided to just step out and not stand there.

So this was my first time going out solo and I had this mental flaw where once I feel like I've accomplished my task, I have a huge urge to just go home and that's how I felt tonight. Although I reminded myself I still need to scout for some locations where I can pull girls to. I walked around for a bit longer and found three different alley ways. Two of them were large enough for me to park my car in. Though these alleys were very bare so there weren't that many structures where you could just hid in the corner without passerby being able to see you. I'll probably need to do further research. Also there are rats lol, I feel like that'll be a huge turn off.

Things I think I did well on:

- did some scouting, not very fruitful but some decent looking spots.
- went out solo for the first time and approached solo.
- danced solo on the dance floor and created some decent attraction, HBMexiFilipina noticed before I approached her and even complimented me for my dancing.

Things I think I need to improve on:

- approaching more when out solo, need to negate this "oh I did my job now I can finally go home" mentality.
- creating stronger sexual tension. Girls are still hooked during the interaction but they're not turned on again. I think I'm coming off as guy that is confident enough to dance with a girl but not mysterious/sexy/or smooth enough to turn her on.

 

[Beck Bass]

Well done on going solo for the first time! It's normal to want to get out of there if things aren't super going your way, but you did a decent job staying for a while, it seems. Try to find something to keep you entertained at the venue, maybe the music, or just watching other people's behaviours lol

For the sexual tension, try getting your fundies as high as they'll go, specially eye contact and body language... Posture is big, though you must have decent, since you're dancing with all those girls. But try moving slower and talking slower, it can have a really powerful vibe to it if you do it right. Also eyefuck those girls like, really hard... And work on your voice, talk, again, slow, but deep and powerful, and if you can, try to add that purr to it, it's hard to teach, I myself don't have that much, but if you can add it, it's awesome

 

[Lushie]

Friday - May 7, 2023

Don't you love it when you catch a virus and you can't go out for a couple of weeks? I totally love it! : ) Thankfully I've been feeling better and I can finally hit the field again. But it's going to be challenging because I lost my momentum and my senses.

So I'm suppose to be hanging my friends, Ball and Jac. But tonight Ball's girl was joining us and she was bringing two girls with her. Jac and I ended up arriving earlier than the group so we decided to hit up SaH to warm up.

At this point it's like 10:45pm. There were a few groups of girls that were dancing and attractive enough but they seemed really enthralled in their group that i didn't want to disrupt. Especially since it's still early in the night so girls aren't ready to let go. Jac and I hit the dance floor and he started pointing me towards two black girls that were twerking together. But I declined. Now Jac's way of approaching girls dancing is honestly questionable to me. He likes to hover and start dancing behind them and hope that they're receptive. Base on reading articles here and getting advices, I know that approaching from behind is the worst.

Approach #1

As I was dancing I noticed a mixed set FFFM and one of the girl was eyeing me, a cute latina with freaky moves. Im disappointed in myself that I didn't maintain eye contact. I lost that dominant intent but I wanted to approach. I was waiting for an opening but then I lost her. There were still two other girls dancing. So I decided to just approach one of them since they were attractive enough. But ofc being the rusty guy I was, I approached by tapping the girls arm from BEHIND. She turned and I offered my hand to take hers but she just turned back away.

Bummer, finally Ball and his girl arrived and we met up with them and vibe at a different club, we'll call it 2A2. The two girls that my friend brought were cute and cool but seemed crazy in a bad way lol.

Anyway, Im dancing around and I noticed so many cute girls dancing so I'm just waiting.. waiting.. waiting... but then i thought wtf am I waiting for? AI? Eye-contact? Their body's facing me? All the signals that the girl is open to me? This is what happens when I'm starting from the bottom. I rely so much on hints and reassurance that the girl will be receptive but end up waiting and not approaching. I need to have the stoic mentality of approaching and not expecting anything. Being unashamed to show intent while being unfazed of negative responses. I need to not lift these girls in a high position by approaching as if i'm seeking their approval.

Approach #2

But unfortunately I didn't fulfill that. As I was dancing two girls walked by one of them was this cute asian blonde with all white dress. I can see her friend suddenly stopping next to me as if she was tryna to get us together. I took this cue and waited before tapping the asian girl on the arm. But as I did so she started dancing and turning around. I ejected and they walked away.

I turned around and I see Jac dancing and kissing some other girl. So now I need to get a move on but I'm hesitating. I'm relying on AIs to make a move and it ends up wasting my time.

Approach #3

But then a FFM (gay guy) set came in and Jac pointed me towards them, we moved and started dancing near them. I see a blonde she looks older but still fuckable. Im dancing behind her and waiting for a good moment then when the music starts to settle down and she's settling down I open from the side.

me: hey i gotta say your friends are so fun
her: yeah i know right! something blah blah

Reached out my hand for her to take and she smiled but said no. I persist again.

me: oh c' mon
her: i cant I have a boyfriend, i'm sorry
me; gotcha no problem, i still think you look beautiful.
her: what no YOU look beautiful
me: oh thank you haha
her: my friends are also cute aren't they!?
me: yeah for sure they are! (not really)

so i just continued dancing and she's joining me. we're not grinding on each other but we're going shoulder against shoulder and just vibing. Eventually I ejected since I wasn't seeing any progress. Also I never addressed her friends but i wonder if that would've convinced her further to dance with me.

Anyway i'm still dancing and i see another FFM set dancing near us. One of the girl is my type but I saw her kissing some other guy before so I was hesitant to make a move. Eventually they left and i saw her turned and smiled at me. Fuck me man. I keep doubting myself.

Approach #4

We then moved to a different club and I see two older girls like late twenties dancing. One girl was totally my type but I waited too long to make a move. One guy started dancing with them so i moved away to find better crowd. While I was moving one of the girl looked at me and smiled, I smiled back but continued forward. I came back to my friends and those girls were still there so I positioned myself and as I was walking away that same girl smiled and I opened. I reached out my hand but then her face changed and she turned away. Fuck me. I think she may have sensed that I was hesitating too much and wasn't showing confidence and a sort of stoic personality. She was able to sniff that out.

Approach #5

Saw a girl vining with her friends with a bottle. I opened using that. Step up from the side.

Me: hey are you gonna drink all that?
Her: Yeah i am

Tried to get her to dance but she deflected.

So appearance alone i can get girls to give me AI but when I approach it all goes down. There's something wrong with my opens. My non-verbals must be lacking intent, sexual drive, non-neediness, and others. I think a big chunk of it stems from my mindset/inner game that hasn't been fully polished up.

Things I need to improve on:

- EVERYTHING

Things I did well:

- Despite poor results, at least I persisted and tried to approach

 

[Lushie]

A Critical Self Examination​

Before I go further I want to take some time to reflect and think about my inner game or just my overall progress. I want to figure out where I am and try to get a better idea of where to go.

I recently submitted a question regarding sexual state and got some great feedback as well as some good articles recommended by Chase. After reading the article sexiness: what it is & how to have it I want to try and get the most accurate portray of myself in each of the three categories of sexiness. Obviously, I'm not well experienced so my marks may be off but I'm still gonna try. I want to identify where I am and what areas to focus using a scale of 1-10. 1 is someone with absolute no experience/knoweldge/understanding and will 99% fail. A 5 is someone who can do it but it's by chance and its decent. 10 is a skilled seducer.

Sexual Intent - 4/10

Looking at my general interactions with women and even outside of the clubs, I tend to be dismissive about the possibility of a sexual encounter. Unless they're fucking hot with very skimpy clothes. When I look at the best seducers, they have a different perspective of women and see them completely different from an average man. I cannot say I'm anywhere near but I'm aware of the missing hole. But if I were to go back to the scenarios where I'm dancing with girls, I think I come across more.. a bold but harmless guy that knows how to lead a girl and get her intimate with me. However, when I'm dancing with a girl I will look at her but I don't consciously think about wanting to fuck her brains out. Reading the article Women as Sex Object: Supercharge Your Game should help me progress in those areas.

Sexual Confidence - 3/10

Sexual confidence is tough here, frankly speaking I haven't fucked in a couple of years. Not that I don't get opportunities but rather they're not from women I find hot. That being said, it does affect my sexual confidence. But if I were to evaulate myself from the materials and experiences I had, knowing that the average guy isn't going out and studying the game and studying women. I'm confident I can read a women to a certain degree and understand what she needs. The question is will my body react accordingly? I don't think so. Regardless, I value myself as guy that's better than your average guy. But the experience is missing.

Sex Appeal - 5/10

A main chunk of this stems from fundamentals. I would say my fundamentals aren't terrible but not amazing obviously. I can talk slowly if I'm in the right mood/comfortable/familiar with the scenario after repeating it. My fashion is good enough basing this on the amount of compliments I get from girls. I consciously try to act/be relax and slower my movements so I'm not always jittering around, but sometimes I forget. Also, I would say my facial structure/beauty is pretty good considering I have a good history of attracting hot girls in the past. However, eye-contact isn't the best, I tend to break them more often than I would like, unless I'm riding off of good momentum. Facial expressions also aren't the best, sometimes I would break into a goofy smile or a needy smile when I open girls. I've been trying to practice a sexy smirk but I haven't made it ingrain in my behavior naturally yet.

Another article I read that I want to delve further on is Picture the Conquest, when I think of my ideal type I think of a blonde white girl or a wavy-hair Latina with a sense of maturity/composure/non-judgemental but full of sexual confidence and free flowing. But when I see those types in clubs I can't help but freeze up. It seems like my mental state hasn't fully accepted the possibility of being with a women of those caliber. I've definitely had histories of engaging/interacting with those types and them being initially attracted to me but I haven't bed much. I would say my ex was almost exactly that type, she was a sexually confident, mature and non judgmental blonde white girl. She just lacked self-confidence and had crippling anxiety. So a part of me knows I can bag those types but I haven't fully nourish it. I believe doing a lot of visualization and ingraining those thoughts will be a start to altering my mindset.

In conclusion... I'm far from ideal and I can see how women can sniff this out from me. However, it's not terrible there's some good aspects thanks to the progress I've made from gaming. I'm constantly learning more and more, the next steps is to take these notes and consciously make an effort to improve them.

So where do I go from here? What areas to focus on? I think when looking at the three categories of sexiness, each of those areas will slowly improve just from constantly gaming and learning/tweaking mistakes here and there. Experiences triumph anything else and I need more. But if there's one thing I want to focus on is showing strong sexual intent and desire. I want women to see me as a sexual man and not some cute platonic boy. Especially if I'm looking for those beautiful young but mature ladies.

 

[Lushie]

Saturday May 27, 2023

After the previous night's field report, I had to go out again and make up for the poor performance.

So Ball texted me and we went out just the two of us. We wanted to go back to 2A2 but while in line I realized I made the worst rookie mistake... I FORGOT MY WALLET. FUCK. So without my ID our options of where to go was very limited. However, we did have one club we knew the bouncers very well and it was free. Thankfully as soon as those guys saw us, they let us in immediately. So now I gotta make the most out of one club for tonight.

Approach #1 (warm approach)

As we walked in and were vibing, I saw a Brazilian girl smiling and looking at us in surprise and it took me a few moment to realized it was the same Brazilian girl we had approached months ago. So I went up to her and gave her a hug saying it's been a while and blah blah. She brought her roommate who was this blonde Brazilian and I reached out my hand to get a handshake. She smiled and greet me back and then I pull her in and gave her a twirl. She was really receptive, but then after wards I just settled down. I don't know why I didn't continued probably because it was too soon to dance since we were still shocked that we just ran into each other. Anyway, both the Brazilian girls started talking to Ball and I just stood there vibing. Eventually Ball asked if I wanted to get some drinks so we ejected from them. Tbh they were in their 30s so I didn't want to push forward that interaction but I know they were into Ball but he wasn't into them.

After we got our drink we started just vibing and it started to get really awkward. There were a couple of group of girls and the club wasn't too packed so everyone was noticeable. Especially us two, who were just standing around doing nothing. I wanted to dance and perhaps try to join a group but Ball isnt much of a dancer, he's more of a wall flower where girls just come to him. So I wasted a lot of time hesitating and grooving despite seeing some opportunities.

Approach #2

Eventually, 3 girls stop in-front of me and Ball and started dancing with each other. I had a good feeling about this group because unlike the other girls they weren't circling themselves too tight so there were room for my squeeze in if I wanted. Also, one of the blonde girl (the cuter one) was looking at me a couple of times. So I waited for a good opportunity to open. Suddenly that blonde girl acted a little goofy and her friend was like "are you okay" so I stepped in and opened her friend next to her saying "is your friend okay lol?" and the blonde girl leaned in closer to me and I introduced myself and reached out for a handshake. She gladly took it and I pulled her in and gave her a twirl. I then started dancing with her and her friends were LOVING It, they were cheering and were impressed. Everyone else around us was looking at me dancing with the girl too so it was a great feeling. Eventually, I thought I want to add the other friends in too, so I let go of my girl and twirl another blondie and she was receptive and I started dancing with her too. Eventually I let go and I was just dancing with the 3 girls but then it started to die down and here's where I fucked up. I didn't know what else to do since I was sensing the magic started to die. I open the original cute blonde girl and asked some stupid question like "so how you guys know each other" and she kinda was like *uhh wtf kinda of lame question* and just said "uh idk just school and from work". At that point I was like yeah I fucked up, so I disengaged and went back to Ball.

Approach #3

We moved around to the other side of the club and I spot a cute wavy hair brunette with nice curves. I noticed her making eye-contact with me a couple of times but I would break them before her. So when I saw her dancing on her own I came by and did a hip bump and she turned and smiled at me. I looked at her and smiled but then after a few moment she just turned away. Well fuck me, I should've asked her name or something.

Approach #4

I saw a group of girls sitting at a VIP seat and they were just dancing in their seats. So I was like why the fuck are they dancing while sitting. One of those was a hot petite Latina with a full white dress so I walked up direct to her and reached out my hand. She looked at me and smiled but shaked her head no. I made some gestures saying "aw alright whatever no problem" and walked away.

Approach #5

Moved back to the other side of the club and spot three Indian girls. One of them I remember was eyeing me but I liked her friend more, a cute petite girl with a full on white dress. So I danced a bit away from then and jumped right between them and started dancing. One of the girl looked surprised at first and then they all started going along and hyping me up. I looked at my target leaned over and said I liked her style. I reached out my hand and gave her a twirl and we began dancing together. The girls were loving it. But here I tried to get a little more sexual, I lift both her hands up and ran my hands down across her body and shifted behind to let her grind on me. She was complying for a bit until one her friend stop me and was like "oh no no, she's not doing that with you" and so I just raised my arms up and was like "oh my bad" and danced a bit before ejecting from them. LOL that's interesting, never had that happened before.

At that point, Ball and I decided to go home. So that concludes the end of this report. Overall, it was a shaky night but a good one. I say shaky because the first 30 minutes or so, we kinda just stood around in the dance floor just looking for prey and I felt really uncomfortable doing that. My wing likes that sort of thing idk why, it works for him I guess but definitely not for me. After making the first group approach, I definitely felt the momentum going and I need to force myself to approach sooner so I can get that initial slump out of the way. Also, I'm not happy with the way I transitioned with the first set, from now on, if I don't have anything good to say I'm not going to say anything and just walk away. And when I'm dancing, instead of trying to twirl girls and then giving myself a twirl which is something I like to do as a follow-up move (because I get a lot of good reactions), I'm going to just test twirling a girl and bringing her in closer and just eye-fucking her. I want to try and see if this could help create a bubble between us.

Things I need to Improve on:
- Approaching ASAP
- Disengaging smoothly

Things I did well on:
- Approaching groups of girls
- Dancing with multiple
- Making side-bumps / barely used this but I need to because it's pretty effective