Alright so this is my first post on here. Before i head into my question/dilemma i figured whoever would help me might want to know a little about my experience if it would help. I'm 22 and have been with tens of women. I'm pretty confident that on any given night i can pick up women from bars(sometimes i get struck down, we all do) and one thing i'm always good at is making the attraction spark. Now there's a girl who has changed my mentality of what i want completely, from player mentality to being the bf mentality.
So around christmas time i met this girl. She was a dime, and also a good girl, and we instantly hit it off and she was always the one chasing. We dated for about 2 and half months until about a week into March. A couple months in one night before sex she questioned me on where i stood relationship wise. Because she was so damn into me and also chasing me i was actually kinda bored with her so i told her i needed more time and after that i became distant with her. She would keep texting me but sometimes i just never responded so she finally got the picture and moved on. I was cool with it.
About a week before her birthday which was mid may i thought about her and texted telling her we should meet up for drinks that night.. she said alright. I went out with my friends anyway and ran into her at the popular college bar. She saw me and was all over me that night. After that i was reminded how great she really is and how i screwed up. Anyways so we planned to hang out, she flaked. No problem, rescheduled and flaked again. played it cool and we hung out a few days later. We hit it off but there was no sex cause she had a friend with her who basically dragged her out before i could close.
Heres the problem...I realized after that night i was the one chasing. Roles flipped. Realizing i need to get a hold of my balls back, I didn't talk to her for a few days. Then i told her i was going to one of the college bars with a friend and she should join. She said alright and she would see me there. She showed up around 1230 with a friend and when i went to go say hi she acted like she barely knew me. This was all new to me so I said fuck it i'll just go talk to other girls if she wasn't feelin it. She left like 30 minutes after she got there and started messaging me that she was sorry and that she "didn't like hanging out when i've been drinking" and i said "right back at ya" cause this is second time she's acted distant at a bar. She sent 2 long messages basically cause she was mad and i just didn't respond. Thinking she was gone and pissed (didn't really show it) cause she was either trying to play games with me or mind fuck me, I picked up a girl from the bar and took her home. SHE SHOWED UP randomly again literally as i was walking out the door with a girl so i blow by her out the door like i didn't see her and acted like i wasn't with the girl either(girl i picked up follows behind me).
Next day i read her messages and told her to call me so we could talk about what she wants cause i didn't want more games. I basically told her i liked her and wanted to be with her and that i knew i screwed up first time around. She tells me she likes me and everything about me but she isn't ready for a relationship....WHAT I SHOULD HAVE DONE IS SAID LETS KEEP IT CASUAL THEN and acted cool. But i just said alright and stopped talking to her, but also didn't act mad, just that i was moving on.
What should i do to get her back... or better yet... how should i flip the roles back so that if i do have a chance with her, i've got the power. Being the chaser is no bueno and what i'm against. But she is great so....
Thanks ahead of time and sorry for the long post.
So around christmas time i met this girl. She was a dime, and also a good girl, and we instantly hit it off and she was always the one chasing. We dated for about 2 and half months until about a week into March. A couple months in one night before sex she questioned me on where i stood relationship wise. Because she was so damn into me and also chasing me i was actually kinda bored with her so i told her i needed more time and after that i became distant with her. She would keep texting me but sometimes i just never responded so she finally got the picture and moved on. I was cool with it.
About a week before her birthday which was mid may i thought about her and texted telling her we should meet up for drinks that night.. she said alright. I went out with my friends anyway and ran into her at the popular college bar. She saw me and was all over me that night. After that i was reminded how great she really is and how i screwed up. Anyways so we planned to hang out, she flaked. No problem, rescheduled and flaked again. played it cool and we hung out a few days later. We hit it off but there was no sex cause she had a friend with her who basically dragged her out before i could close.
Heres the problem...I realized after that night i was the one chasing. Roles flipped. Realizing i need to get a hold of my balls back, I didn't talk to her for a few days. Then i told her i was going to one of the college bars with a friend and she should join. She said alright and she would see me there. She showed up around 1230 with a friend and when i went to go say hi she acted like she barely knew me. This was all new to me so I said fuck it i'll just go talk to other girls if she wasn't feelin it. She left like 30 minutes after she got there and started messaging me that she was sorry and that she "didn't like hanging out when i've been drinking" and i said "right back at ya" cause this is second time she's acted distant at a bar. She sent 2 long messages basically cause she was mad and i just didn't respond. Thinking she was gone and pissed (didn't really show it) cause she was either trying to play games with me or mind fuck me, I picked up a girl from the bar and took her home. SHE SHOWED UP randomly again literally as i was walking out the door with a girl so i blow by her out the door like i didn't see her and acted like i wasn't with the girl either(girl i picked up follows behind me).
Next day i read her messages and told her to call me so we could talk about what she wants cause i didn't want more games. I basically told her i liked her and wanted to be with her and that i knew i screwed up first time around. She tells me she likes me and everything about me but she isn't ready for a relationship....WHAT I SHOULD HAVE DONE IS SAID LETS KEEP IT CASUAL THEN and acted cool. But i just said alright and stopped talking to her, but also didn't act mad, just that i was moving on.
What should i do to get her back... or better yet... how should i flip the roles back so that if i do have a chance with her, i've got the power. Being the chaser is no bueno and what i'm against. But she is great so....
Thanks ahead of time and sorry for the long post.
