A
Anonymous
Guest
This is a question about persistence: what's it mean, how far does it go? Let me give you a story....
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I met a girl this summer and had great rapport for 3-4 weeks. She wouldn't to sleep with me (and was resistant even to making out) because she knew I was leaving the city soon (going back to grad school) and saw no long-term potential in this relationship. I couldn't get around this...and I tried (no missed opportunities here!). Still, she kept coming back/going out/sleeping over (3 time - once a week), so I assume she liked me a bit. Neither of us wanted a long-distance relationship, so that was that, but I thought I might move back after I graduate this spring, so I figured keep in touch and keep an option open.
Summer ends, and for the next three months, we're talking every few weeks - text message here, phone call there. Just before the winter holidays, I visit the city where she lives, and we have a great date, where she lets me sleep over, but still resists much of anything physical. That night, I'm pretty tired, and getting bored with being rejected, so I don't try hard either (which may have cooked my goose, as I did a few "weak" things during dinner like not complain when the restaurant messed up my order).
Suddenly, she gets harder to reach - her response pattern changes and gets more reserved. Still, it's Christmas/New Years, I'm busy, so I drop out of touch for a month. After this month, I go visit her city again, text I'm in town, get nothing back. And this past week, I email to say "hi, what's up?", nothing back. That's where things stand.
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So...persistence. I've followed the site for a while, have some experience, and so I think the answer to "what next" should be "walk away". Still, she's a rare one, and I hear how girls love "persistence." In cases like this (where a girl isn't responding to you, but there was a connection), I never know what to do:
(1) What's "persistence" mean? Is the only smart choice here to walk away and be done?
(2) I set out at the start to show "persistence" - was this a dumb idea or could it have worked if I'd "persisted" differently?
v/r
Auric
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I met a girl this summer and had great rapport for 3-4 weeks. She wouldn't to sleep with me (and was resistant even to making out) because she knew I was leaving the city soon (going back to grad school) and saw no long-term potential in this relationship. I couldn't get around this...and I tried (no missed opportunities here!). Still, she kept coming back/going out/sleeping over (3 time - once a week), so I assume she liked me a bit. Neither of us wanted a long-distance relationship, so that was that, but I thought I might move back after I graduate this spring, so I figured keep in touch and keep an option open.
Summer ends, and for the next three months, we're talking every few weeks - text message here, phone call there. Just before the winter holidays, I visit the city where she lives, and we have a great date, where she lets me sleep over, but still resists much of anything physical. That night, I'm pretty tired, and getting bored with being rejected, so I don't try hard either (which may have cooked my goose, as I did a few "weak" things during dinner like not complain when the restaurant messed up my order).
Suddenly, she gets harder to reach - her response pattern changes and gets more reserved. Still, it's Christmas/New Years, I'm busy, so I drop out of touch for a month. After this month, I go visit her city again, text I'm in town, get nothing back. And this past week, I email to say "hi, what's up?", nothing back. That's where things stand.
-----
So...persistence. I've followed the site for a while, have some experience, and so I think the answer to "what next" should be "walk away". Still, she's a rare one, and I hear how girls love "persistence." In cases like this (where a girl isn't responding to you, but there was a connection), I never know what to do:
(1) What's "persistence" mean? Is the only smart choice here to walk away and be done?
(2) I set out at the start to show "persistence" - was this a dumb idea or could it have worked if I'd "persisted" differently?
v/r
Auric
