Hey guys, Garrett here.
In Chase's post, he talks about how it's good to be picky because you'll be more likely to get better quality service from the people around you; they'll be more inclined to cater to YOUR needs/desires. In another post about making friends, he goes on to say that you should provide value to the person in a way that they would appreciate. For example, say you're in high school and you want to make friends with a jock. You decide to invite them to toss a football around, despite the fact that you aren't very interested in football. How will you befriend this guy if you aren't into football, and you decide to be picky? Isn't being picky detrimental to making new friends and not being willing to engage in what this person loves? Say the person starts talking about their favourite subject, Politics. You hate politics, and because of that you tell them, "Hey Mike, thanks for sharing some info about politics, but I'm not very interested in it man." That's going to hinder your relatability and he won't feel as connected to you if you choose not to hear about his passion. Another example, say your girlfriend has an upcoming ballet recital. You really don't give a crap about ballet, and you'd rather be doing something else. At the same time, you know how important ballet is to this girl... do you tell her you aren't interested in it and not show up, leaving her potentially pissed off/upset with you, or do you go, be supportive, and try to make the best of it, even if you don't like it?
Therefore, I think being pickiness depends on the occasion and the circumstances. I think there are times to be picky, like if a close friend invites you to a car show or a girlfriend invites you over to babysit her younger siblings, you can tell them, "Look bro, I appreciate the invite, but I'm not that into cars." and to the girl, "Hey babe, thanks for thinking of me, but I don't want to babysit your sisters." With that being said, if you know something means a lot to a person, or if you are trying to make a new friend, I think you should set your pickiness aside, but if you know it's not a big deal/won't offend them, you should be picky with the person if you aren't interested. I think it takes experience and a bit of a social intuition to be aware of your limits in these circumstances. Maybe I'm a little off here, but I feel that the examples above demonstrate 'walking down the middle way'. If you have any thoughts, comments, or critiques, I'd be happy to hear them!
Cheers,
Garrett
In Chase's post, he talks about how it's good to be picky because you'll be more likely to get better quality service from the people around you; they'll be more inclined to cater to YOUR needs/desires. In another post about making friends, he goes on to say that you should provide value to the person in a way that they would appreciate. For example, say you're in high school and you want to make friends with a jock. You decide to invite them to toss a football around, despite the fact that you aren't very interested in football. How will you befriend this guy if you aren't into football, and you decide to be picky? Isn't being picky detrimental to making new friends and not being willing to engage in what this person loves? Say the person starts talking about their favourite subject, Politics. You hate politics, and because of that you tell them, "Hey Mike, thanks for sharing some info about politics, but I'm not very interested in it man." That's going to hinder your relatability and he won't feel as connected to you if you choose not to hear about his passion. Another example, say your girlfriend has an upcoming ballet recital. You really don't give a crap about ballet, and you'd rather be doing something else. At the same time, you know how important ballet is to this girl... do you tell her you aren't interested in it and not show up, leaving her potentially pissed off/upset with you, or do you go, be supportive, and try to make the best of it, even if you don't like it?
Therefore, I think being pickiness depends on the occasion and the circumstances. I think there are times to be picky, like if a close friend invites you to a car show or a girlfriend invites you over to babysit her younger siblings, you can tell them, "Look bro, I appreciate the invite, but I'm not that into cars." and to the girl, "Hey babe, thanks for thinking of me, but I don't want to babysit your sisters." With that being said, if you know something means a lot to a person, or if you are trying to make a new friend, I think you should set your pickiness aside, but if you know it's not a big deal/won't offend them, you should be picky with the person if you aren't interested. I think it takes experience and a bit of a social intuition to be aware of your limits in these circumstances. Maybe I'm a little off here, but I feel that the examples above demonstrate 'walking down the middle way'. If you have any thoughts, comments, or critiques, I'd be happy to hear them!
Cheers,
Garrett
