A
Anonymous
Guest
Hi – I would love to get your perspective on my email below… Thanks much!
About three years ago I started to notice this stunning blond at my church. We go to a big church of more than 20,000 in TX. Soon after that, I started to see her on a regular basis (in the halls/passing/etc). On a few occasions, I caught her taking good looks at me. The tough thing is that even though we are both single, we have a significant other – and kids.
18 months ago, this girl ends up joining the very same service group I am on (about six people - my girlfriend is on the same group). Over that time, we developed good energy. I have also been getting many signs (plays with hair, eyes dilate, singed her emails as “me”, gets gitty, calls me by name often, laughs at my jokes, called her and she said it made her day, talks to me afterwards to the point of being late for church, etc.).
We only got together once (informal) but it was good. We un-expectantly talked for three hours (I know she had a good time). That night she said we should get together again but it hasn’t happened. I tried to set something up but she pushed back with “I can’t fit it in” (does have three kids who have tons of activities – always on the go). But recently she said (several times) that she was hoping to run into me (accidentally) outside of church. Then she proceeded to give me the directions to her house.
At times, there is coy/hard-to-get behavior coming from her - and push/pull from me (being SUPER heavy on the teasing – been working her hard since the start). The other week things got heated. Our whole conversation seemed loaded with romantic tension and I was teasing her pretty good. I wanted to be a bit more direct and said “maybe I think you are the best - but just maybe” in push-pull style. She sort of acknowledged that she knew, but stopped, leaned close into me, looked me right in the eyes and said “If that’s true, why do you tease me so much?” I responded “because you love it” (push-pull again). She responded “no I don’t” in a sort-of laugh and headed off for the service to meet her fam. Never saw this from her before – it looked like subdued anger.
Maybe too much push/pull has her thinking I am just playing with her and keeping it from going deeper (or that because I get lots of female attention I am not that into her…..not sure why this girl is grabbing me either)? Or maybe she is just a flirt – but have never seen her flirt with anyone else.
I find myself over-thinking it. My gut tells me she is interested but something is holding her back.
So: #1 - Am I reading this correctly, #2 – What action do you suggest?
Appreciation!
About three years ago I started to notice this stunning blond at my church. We go to a big church of more than 20,000 in TX. Soon after that, I started to see her on a regular basis (in the halls/passing/etc). On a few occasions, I caught her taking good looks at me. The tough thing is that even though we are both single, we have a significant other – and kids.
18 months ago, this girl ends up joining the very same service group I am on (about six people - my girlfriend is on the same group). Over that time, we developed good energy. I have also been getting many signs (plays with hair, eyes dilate, singed her emails as “me”, gets gitty, calls me by name often, laughs at my jokes, called her and she said it made her day, talks to me afterwards to the point of being late for church, etc.).
We only got together once (informal) but it was good. We un-expectantly talked for three hours (I know she had a good time). That night she said we should get together again but it hasn’t happened. I tried to set something up but she pushed back with “I can’t fit it in” (does have three kids who have tons of activities – always on the go). But recently she said (several times) that she was hoping to run into me (accidentally) outside of church. Then she proceeded to give me the directions to her house.
At times, there is coy/hard-to-get behavior coming from her - and push/pull from me (being SUPER heavy on the teasing – been working her hard since the start). The other week things got heated. Our whole conversation seemed loaded with romantic tension and I was teasing her pretty good. I wanted to be a bit more direct and said “maybe I think you are the best - but just maybe” in push-pull style. She sort of acknowledged that she knew, but stopped, leaned close into me, looked me right in the eyes and said “If that’s true, why do you tease me so much?” I responded “because you love it” (push-pull again). She responded “no I don’t” in a sort-of laugh and headed off for the service to meet her fam. Never saw this from her before – it looked like subdued anger.
Maybe too much push/pull has her thinking I am just playing with her and keeping it from going deeper (or that because I get lots of female attention I am not that into her…..not sure why this girl is grabbing me either)? Or maybe she is just a flirt – but have never seen her flirt with anyone else.
I find myself over-thinking it. My gut tells me she is interested but something is holding her back.
So: #1 - Am I reading this correctly, #2 – What action do you suggest?
Appreciation!
