Question-- Asking girls out in a classroom (group/social context)

[ElChe]

Hey everyone,

I had a quick question about calibrating when you ask a girl out... but you both are in a situation where you don't want it to be obvious that you're asking her out.

Recently I was chilling in a classroom and charging my laptop, then a cute girl walks in and we start chatting. The conversation and connection/attraction was great and I'm sure if I would've asked her out she would've said yes.

But... by the time I would've asked her, like 4 other girls had entered the classroom. I wasn't in that class, but she was.

What is the best way to maneuver that situation and still get the date/number?

My friend suggested I ask her if she wanted to study (which I COULD do, but we weren't in the same major).

I also could've just not cared and asked her to coffee or whatever.

It's weird. Like I don't care too much if she rejects me, but if other people see, then I get kinda "hmm maybe I'll just sneak my way outta this". It kind of spooks me actually

Appreciate any thoughts or advice.

 

[ElChe]

Honestly? I think I have a fear of just showing attraction for a girl in a group setting . Spooks the hell out of me. But when I'm with her alone I give way less shits.

I think I will get super good at "under-the-radar" approaching and flirting (and asking her out out)...

 

[TwoNameGame]

My friend suggested I ask her if she wanted to study (which I COULD do, but we weren't in the same major).

Studying is good because being a good study budy doesn't depend on major. It also demonstrates value and authority. As a professional, I typically mix pickup with studying to great success. It is also surprisingly easy.

Decent study tips are often enough for any subject. My advice is either approach it Socraticaly or stick to study tools of you are completely clueless. Incidentally, the Socratic method is much like deep diving. I'll explain below since anyone could use these tips.

Spoiler: Socratic Study

This works if you aren't clueless about the subject. Not a high bar, yet strongly effective in any setting. Like a deep dive, these questions are surprisingly helpful at getting to know a study buddy.

Basically, ask questions to foster understanding. Such as:

• What does this mean to you (in your own words)?
• Provide and explain an example.
• Walk me through your process.
• What is the connection between these 2 concepts?
• Why does this matter? How would you use this (academically or in practice)?

Feel free to have the book/ her notes in front of you. Trust me, these are some of the best ways to study anyways in my professional opinion.

Spoiler: Study Tools

If you are completely lost on the subject, here are tools/activities you can suggest. These help generate compliance, but try not to over invest in her yourself. My favorites:

• Flashcards. Make it into a game (no pun intended) so everyone has fun. Not only is fun good for attraction, it helps with learning.
• Mindmaps. Get close to her physically to help with the drawing. Perspective is key to make these as helpful as possible, so you have an excuse to get close and maybe guide her.
• Examples. Find interesting stories that exemplify concepts and lend themselves to conversations. I could take about funny court cases all day and still get the point across.
• Kinesthetic. Yes, movement helps you learn, look it up. Use this as an oppurtunity to farm compliance or move her. Take a break to get up and get water together. Make her do yoga. Get her heart rate up to loosen tension and build attraction.
• Libraries. By this I mean compiling a list of resources, such as teaching her to read the book, finding good YouTube channels, and finding on campus services. Use this as an excuse to escalate. Offer to walk her to tutoring, schedule a time to watch videos, or use it to establish some similarity.

You'd be surprised how often I recite/implement Girls Chase articles in a tutoring setting and get praised for my insights by framing them as 'communications' or 'leadership' seminars.

Other than that, either try inviting her to campus events that may interest her (ex. Festivals, clubs, or resources) or go for the number anyways as very few classmates speak to each other from my experience. Campuses have some cool stuff that few people know of.