Recurring strange problem on Tinder

[jackoftades819]

So in a previous post I put up a conversation with a Tinder match to get feedback on it: viewtopic.php?f=25&t=15800. As I expected, she flaked on me. When I matched with her, she was over 100 miles away and wouldn't return nearby for another week so I was willing to wait. But another match a few months ago did the same exact thing and another match just today did the same thing! Another thing to mention is that all my matches are kind of on the chubby side and being the desperate guy that I am, I didn't care as long as I got a date. But I haven't been on a date in over a year! And only had 3 matches in the past few weeks! So what the hell is going on in Tinder? Why do I keep matching with fat girls when they are 100 miles away? Or are they just screwing with me so they can have a texting buddy? Is it my pics? I have no idea and I need some advice on this because I'm willing to give up on Tinder for about the fifth time already.

 

[Seppuku]

Hey JOT,

First of all, to get more matches, you need to tweak something about your pictures. With Tinder and other online match sites, it is first and foremost about the pictures. And the pictures that work best are not always the ones you think. Get many other pictures, with different styles, different angles, different look and feel, different vibes. And try them out. You may be surprised to discover which pics work and which don't.

Second, you may have to work on your mindset. There is a big winner effect in seduction... meaning that the guy who believes he will win has a better chance to win. And the guy who expects to be losing has a harder time. Something about your mindset transcribes into your texting, and also into your body language when face to face. A sort of self fulfilling prophecy. I don't know much about you but there are a few pointers in your text: "As I expected, she flaked on me" "being the desperate guy I am". You need a more winner mentality.

A few other hints:

• * Not sure how you text the girls into a date, but your invitation needs to be low key, like not a very big deal. No desperation here.
  * Having many girls on text at the same time helps, because you don't care as much about one particular girl (and therefore more low key and less neediness)
  * When you're eventually face to face with her, remember that she's here because she needs to be fucked by you. And you're here to make it happen.

Ok man, don't give up.

Cheers,
Seppuku