Hey there yall, hope you are having a great day.
Yesterday, I opened GC and this forum to read some good threads and articles on break up (since I got dumped from my now ex-gf)
Last time I posted here was nearly 16 months ago, it was a thread about a random girl from dating app and her behaviour (I checked it and it was 22 September 2023). This of course has nothing to do with my former gf or what this post is about, I just want to thank you all for the responses I got because this community always gave me a great insight.
Fast forward a few days later, on 26 sep. 2023, I met a girl on dating app that I had a mutual crush with, and after a second date we already kissed atop of a hill and on third made out. She was 8 years younger than me, and was still going to high school (Im now 27, she 19). Things went pretty quickly, and after the second date, she already asked me if I wanted to get into relationship (Ive already had few before, and its been a long time since last one), I got really confused - part of me wanted to still be having casual flings with girls, but another part of me was telling me that this girl really completes me well, so I agreed. This girl was actually truthful with me, had a kind heart and beautiful soul. She looked cute and acted in a kind of silly manner, but I enjoyed every second of it. But she was also really submissive, not just with me but also with her parents. And had sometimes low confidence about herself.
I am not gonna write here about the fact that we were madly in love. Nor am I gonna go on a writting spree about everything that went well, even though im mostly optimistic person, I am gonna leave that to my personal diary. What I am going to write here is how our breakup went and what I think went wrong:
1. ) I really think that my problem may have been that I stopped reading articles on GC and Skilled Seducer and became complacent.
When I was just going out meeting new girls, I always used to read some useful article before and improved on daily basis. After I got into a relationship, I though to myself that I wont be needing this anymore. Second thing is that my mistake was that I forgot about my hobbies (guitar, piano, language lessons), the only thing I kept doing was gym. But beside that, my attention went mostly to her, and I guess she noticed that I was becoming lazy in life and that the scales were tipping in her favor. She told me yesterday that one of the reasons she broke up was that I stopped doing what I liked to do.
2.) Her mom: Nah, it isnt what you think it is. Her mother is really psycho (negativistic, hates her job, gives off bad vibes, yells at her daughter, has oneitis on someone who doesnt want her, etc...), and she didnt like me at all. She would always find something bad about me, and I really think that she may have influenced my gfs opinion about me (but, in front of me, she would put on a mask of "good mom"). Because my gfs dad died like a 7 years ago, she was living only with her mom back home. My gf lives in another city but studies in mine, so she would often stay over at my appartment, her mom would think that she could lose her, and when her mom got mad from some little thing, she would go crazy and hang up the phone during conversation (some really weird psycho behavior if you ask me).
Now dont get me wrong, I dont want her back, because I think she chose her side and I believe in "no taksies backsies". If she had courage even with tears in her eyes to tell me to end the relationship, my doors are closed (no writing, no thinking, even though she looks like she could write back anytime soon as I see it). Only reason why I am writing this here is to get some insight on what may have been my mistake and if it could have been caused by someone or something else?
Chase wrote, that the best way to forget about what happened is to write somewhere what went wrong, starting from the fuckup all the way to the good times. I would also like to ask you guys if there is some other coping mechanism I could use to forget about this less painfully? I want to get back to getting some lays to forget about this, but dont know if my personality wouldnt be afected by the fact that it happened just yesterday?
Many thanks,
VinM
Yesterday, I opened GC and this forum to read some good threads and articles on break up (since I got dumped from my now ex-gf)
Last time I posted here was nearly 16 months ago, it was a thread about a random girl from dating app and her behaviour (I checked it and it was 22 September 2023). This of course has nothing to do with my former gf or what this post is about, I just want to thank you all for the responses I got because this community always gave me a great insight.
Fast forward a few days later, on 26 sep. 2023, I met a girl on dating app that I had a mutual crush with, and after a second date we already kissed atop of a hill and on third made out. She was 8 years younger than me, and was still going to high school (Im now 27, she 19). Things went pretty quickly, and after the second date, she already asked me if I wanted to get into relationship (Ive already had few before, and its been a long time since last one), I got really confused - part of me wanted to still be having casual flings with girls, but another part of me was telling me that this girl really completes me well, so I agreed. This girl was actually truthful with me, had a kind heart and beautiful soul. She looked cute and acted in a kind of silly manner, but I enjoyed every second of it. But she was also really submissive, not just with me but also with her parents. And had sometimes low confidence about herself.
I am not gonna write here about the fact that we were madly in love. Nor am I gonna go on a writting spree about everything that went well, even though im mostly optimistic person, I am gonna leave that to my personal diary. What I am going to write here is how our breakup went and what I think went wrong:
1. ) I really think that my problem may have been that I stopped reading articles on GC and Skilled Seducer and became complacent.
When I was just going out meeting new girls, I always used to read some useful article before and improved on daily basis. After I got into a relationship, I though to myself that I wont be needing this anymore. Second thing is that my mistake was that I forgot about my hobbies (guitar, piano, language lessons), the only thing I kept doing was gym. But beside that, my attention went mostly to her, and I guess she noticed that I was becoming lazy in life and that the scales were tipping in her favor. She told me yesterday that one of the reasons she broke up was that I stopped doing what I liked to do.
2.) Her mom: Nah, it isnt what you think it is. Her mother is really psycho (negativistic, hates her job, gives off bad vibes, yells at her daughter, has oneitis on someone who doesnt want her, etc...), and she didnt like me at all. She would always find something bad about me, and I really think that she may have influenced my gfs opinion about me (but, in front of me, she would put on a mask of "good mom"). Because my gfs dad died like a 7 years ago, she was living only with her mom back home. My gf lives in another city but studies in mine, so she would often stay over at my appartment, her mom would think that she could lose her, and when her mom got mad from some little thing, she would go crazy and hang up the phone during conversation (some really weird psycho behavior if you ask me).
Now dont get me wrong, I dont want her back, because I think she chose her side and I believe in "no taksies backsies". If she had courage even with tears in her eyes to tell me to end the relationship, my doors are closed (no writing, no thinking, even though she looks like she could write back anytime soon as I see it). Only reason why I am writing this here is to get some insight on what may have been my mistake and if it could have been caused by someone or something else?
Chase wrote, that the best way to forget about what happened is to write somewhere what went wrong, starting from the fuckup all the way to the good times. I would also like to ask you guys if there is some other coping mechanism I could use to forget about this less painfully? I want to get back to getting some lays to forget about this, but dont know if my personality wouldnt be afected by the fact that it happened just yesterday?
Many thanks,
VinM
