Sex Talk: The Purity Gambit

[Teevster]

Hey. Here is another gambit I have used with great success that can help you set the right frame and talk about sex quickly with women you interact with. It can be used on dates, as well as in night game (even straight after the opener/hook-point). I have not experienced with this in daygame but you are welcome to play around with it (Bacchus???).

I will get more into the benefits of this gambit in a bit. I will present it first. The transition can be done in many ways, but usually I just start things out with a STATEMENT about female purity. However it is advised to bridge into a subject that make the transition smoother. If you are already talking about sex, then this should be very smooth, but other options of subjects to bridge into before making such statement would be:
- Discuss difference about men and women
- Dating
- What most men/women want
- Relationships
- You get the idea - anything related to the above will do the job.

But you may also go in ballsy and out of the blue make a statement about female purity. This is something I do. Of course more risky, but with the right delivery and the right frame-control this should be doable. It also helps if the girl is compliant (you get away with more if the girl is compliant).

The statement I make is "I like/see female purity"

Controversial? Sure. But read on as I demonstrate the gambit.

Me: I really seek purity in a woman... I find purity to be something virtuous, but before you judge this statement, I would suggest you hear my out (last part is optional)
Her: Oh really?/what do you mean?/ what is female purity to you?

Now, by saying this, few things happens:
- First of all, this is about your perception of women, which is something she cares about since she is a woman... so she will get immersed (hooked) into the conversation
- Secondly, you come off as yet another chauvinist and stuck up guy with madonna/whore complexes...

Now, just like my previous gambit (on submission) I start off by giving out a controversial claim, which may trigger some emotions in here (good or bad - does not matter, since women just love getting stimulated, although bad emotions can generate a negative social frame if not done right), only to later deliver an unexpected perspective that she actually is very likely to agree with and even like. Here, the same principle applies. I find this exact thing to be VERY powerful in field.

Anyway let us get back into it:

Me: I really seek purity in a woman... I find purity to be something virtuous, but before you judge this statement, I would suggest you hear my out (last part is optional)
Her: Oh really?/what do you mean?/ what is female purity to you?
Me: Women who are able to embrace their own sexuality, with openess, true lust and confidence to act upon their desires (very powerful sentence here - bunch of commands... this sentence alone would require a whole post)
Her: huuum! I like this.
Me: Well unlike most men who see purity as restraint from pursuing ones lust, I look at it the opposite way, because what is more beautiful than someone, in this case a women, who act ACCORDING to natures plan? Sex is her purpose (if she is sophisticated you may say "sex is her telos" or "sex is here teleological purpose")
Her: I agree!

You can stop it there, but if you want to you can continue with the thematic!

Me: and people do have sex for many different reasons such as vengeance, a desire for status, validation and so on... but what is more pure than a woman who has sex out of PURE lust?! No other intentions, no other plans, no schemes, just pure lust, passion and desire! It all about sex... for sex! Having sex... to get sex! (if she is sophisticated you may say "she has sex for sex - as a Ding an Sich - Sex an Sich!".
Her: True!
Me: what is more pure than than having sex just for the joy of sex! It is clean, honest and pure! Hence the purity!
Her: wow so true.

So why does this work? Here are some of the mechanisms at play:
- It immerses her in - talking about what you as a man seek in women is interesting to her, no matter whether she is into your not. It is key info to her.
- Gets you talking about sex (and get the ball rolling... as in using this to set the scene to talk about other sexual subjects) and set a sexual frame (duh)
- The controversial statement, which may trigger some just to find out that the actual respone was something that she an accept, relate to and love is very stimulating to women (just like the previous gambit I posted the other week). The idea of having a "twist" is the key here. Being unpredictable (the right way) is sexy.
- Most importantly, you display that you are sexually liberated and that you SEEK sexually liberated women. This can impact her in two ways. If there is compliance, she will be willing to comply to this demand... by acting sexually liberated... she will allow herself to act sexually liberated against you, since that's what you communicate to be attractive (I mean you even label it as "true purity" here).
- But it may also generate some SERIOUS compliance by giving her a chance to feel allowed around you. This is a rare thing for women, and it is desirable. What ever you offer that is rare and desirable to women will most likely grant you compliance.

There is more, but that's what I can think of for now!

Ok, some women will comment about "love". In such case, proceed as following:
Her: but what if you have sex out of love, would the be impure?
Me: Well in that case, is it the SEX ITSELF that is pure, or the love? The main drive here is not the sex, but the emotions.
Her: true
Me: that said, having sex for the sake of having sex can oftentimes transform into pure love, and oftentimes when it does, it generates the best kind of love and relationships.

She won't argue against that. Fixed. This way you:
- Avoid a debate that is not productive
- You let her keep her point while maintaining yours
- And remember that many women seek love (love in female language can be translated into male language as "commitment" - most women seek commitment), so leaving this option hypothetical yet ambiguous may avoid her shutting certain doors, yet without giving her any false hopes since you are being rather ambiguous.

Anyway hope you enjoyed this post.
Questions and comments are welcome,
Alek

 

[Watts]

This would have been a very useful gambit for my set this past Friday.

In the attempt to pull (which failed) she hit me with the "I'm not that type of girl" line.

Truth be told it was a matter of logistics (FR to follow).

But this would be a good response, or even better preemptive frame, to take against the "pure/good girls don't have sex the same night" objection.

Thanks Alek!

 

[Teevster]

In the attempt to pull (which failed) she hit me with the "I'm not that type of girl" line.

Yupp this gambit would have DESTROYED THIS FRAME - it would have prevented it from emerging in the first place.

I follow the advice of Machiavelli - basically:
- Prevent bad shit from happening (fighting against what he calls fortuna)
- And know how to handle bad shit when it happens (having "Virtu" - nothing to do with virtue... virtu is for him the "knowing how" of dealing with situations)

Both these will help leaders to acquire power. For pick up both these will help you succeed and get a high meet to lay ratio. Master the Pro-active (prevent an event) and re-active part (react to an event).

Truth be told it was a matter of logistics (FR to follow).

Maybe - but remember, there is always SOMETHING that will block your interaction (unless you are lucky, but we do not rely on luck - my method is to always assume that wildcards and crap will occur - again a good tip from Machiavelli). So logistics was a blocker. Perhaps you could have solved it, perhaps not, but if you did not have this bad frame occurding ("I am not that type of girl") you would have had more playing room and more chances of handling the logistics block. Now of course, there is no such a thing as a perfect pick up (I am not giving you shit here) - however there is an IDEAL of a perfect pick up that we CONSTANTLY have to strive after.

You can tell I have been doing some academic work today....

But this would be a good response, or even better preemptive frame, to take against the "pure/good girls don't have sex the same night" objection

I comment as I read the comments, apparently you figured it out yourself.

Best,

 

[naturalmikey]

these always appear daunting at first read. and every time i try a pattern i usually fuck it up the first time. but continued use and they really do work in my experience. i do want to try this one. it takes balls and i like that.

when i first found patterns i thought “i don’t wanna memorize all that.” i actually don’t memorize them anymore. i just put them into my own words which makes them more congruent. i relucted using swinggcat’s longer patterns for a long time because i just don’t talk like him. but once i learned it’s not about the exact words being stated verbatim, but rather the underlying meaning of those words i began to understand how to use them. i’ll likely record myself reading this one and listen over and over until i have fully immersed myself in the message and not the words.

 

[Watts]

Yupp this gambit would have DESTROYED THIS FRAME - it would have prevented it from emerging in the first place.

It will absolutely become part of my routines and I'll start implementing it. I'll tell you how it goes.

I follow the advice of Machiavelli - basically:
- Prevent bad shit from happening (fighting against what he calls fortuna)
- And know how to handle bad shit when it happens (having "Virtu" - nothing to do with virtue... virtu is for him the "knowing how" of dealing with situations)

Both these will help leaders to acquire power. For pick up both these will help you succeed and get a high meet to lay ratio. Master the Pro-active (prevent an event) and re-active part (react to an event).

Agree here. I've heard you called a prodigy before. Maybe it'd be more appropriate to say prince?

Maybe - but remember, there is always SOMETHING that will block your interaction (unless you are lucky, but we do not rely on luck - my method is to always assume that wildcards and crap will occur - again a good tip from Machiavelli). So logistics was a blocker. Perhaps you could have solved it, perhaps not, but if you did not have this bad frame occurding ("I am not that type of girl") you would have had more playing room and more chances of handling the logistics block. Now of course, there is no such a thing as a perfect pick up (I am not giving you shit here) - however there is an IDEAL of a perfect pick up that we CONSTANTLY have to strive after.

You are right that without those frames logistics could have possibly overcome (just fuck in the common room, and don't sleep over).

And the goal is to get as close to the ideal as possible, accepting that reality will make that impossible (and also, unknowable in the specific sense i.e. "if I did this instead of that" or "what would they have done in response to that").

We're on the same page there.

You can tell I have been doing some academic work today....

No worries, always appreciate your input in whatever form (overly "academic" or logical or otherwise. I don't shy away from academic style discussions by any means).

To me, the only time the word academic is negative, is when it's meant to mean theoretical discussions that have strayed too far from practical use (generally or from the topic at hand).

I comment as I read the comments, apparently you figured it out yourself.

Haha, still, it was enjoyable to read your response!

 

[Lotus]

Love this. I'm going to incorporate this as well, but some modifications will be made with verbiage to make it congruent for myself. Spitting it out word for word will sound rehearsed.

Yupp this gambit would have DESTROYED THIS FRAME - it would have prevented it from emerging in the first place.

I follow the advice of Machiavelli - basically:
- Prevent bad shit from happening (fighting against what he calls fortuna)
- And know how to handle bad shit when it happens (having "Virtu" - nothing to do with virtue... virtu is for him the "knowing how" of dealing with situations)

Both these will help leaders to acquire power. For pick up both these will help you succeed and get a high meet to lay ratio. Master the Pro-active (prevent an event) and re-active part (react to an event).

This is too true and could probably be it's own post. Being proactive in the corporate world has been a game changer for my career. Preemptively considering how co-workers and bosses will react to conflict..... I have a VP who is relentless and maintains frames like the hulk. When you go into meetings with him and are not 5 steps ahead, he will tear you apart.

I have an interview with him coming up and the outcome depends on how well I can address what I know he will ask before he asks, as well as handling the numerous follow up questions.

Fortuna/proactivity is something all should look to integrate into daily life.

Great post!

Lotus

 

[Glow]

After reading the post, Ive been talking a bit around about purity to get a sense of peoples frame of mind around it. And its a super loaded topic for both guys and girls. Maybe even still a discursive nodal point for people - meaning its a widespread thing that significantly affect and drive a big group of peoples meaning around areas - here sexual behavior.

Loads of guys have the wanting of a more pure girl - the shaming ho perceptance is real in their mind, some arguing girls who sleep around cant really pair bond. Huge red flags for them. Like seriously.

Quite a few girls are tense and scared around the topic, go super attentive when i slide it into convo as a statement. Moves forward. stop what theyre doing. I sense a mesh of perceptions but that it grabs their attention a lot.I dont have a clear idea of dominants perceptances of it yet. I wouldnt call it chick crack as such but def. an attention grabber on the level of a topic like racism to bring up.

Just found these observations interesting and useful.

 

[naturalmikey]

After reading the post, Ive been talking a bit around about purity to get a sense of peoples frame of mind around it. And its a super loaded topic for both guys and girls. Maybe even still a discursive nodal point for people - meaning its a widespread thing that significantly affect and drive a big group of peoples meaning around areas - here sexual behavior.

Loads of guys have the wanting of a more pure girl - the shaming ho perceptance is real in their mind, some arguing girls who sleep around cant really pair bond. Huge red flags for them. Like seriously.

Quite a few girls are tense and scared around the topic, go super attentive when i slide it into convo as a statement. Moves forward. stop what theyre doing. I sense a mesh of perceptions but that it grabs their attention a lot.I dont have a clear idea of dominants perceptances of it yet. I wouldnt call it chick crack as such but def. an attention grabber on the level of a topic like racism to bring up.

Just found these observations interesting and useful.

i’d day this pattern is unnecessary like 95% of the time and you’re probably gonna fuck it up until you can tailor it to work for you. so unless you’re somewhat advanced i would say it would be counterproductive. if you are fairly advanced a 5% increase in closing rate would be awesome. i’ll take any 1% i can get even if i pay for it early in practice.

 

[Teevster]

i’d day this pattern is unnecessary like 95% of the time and you’re probably gonna fuck it up until you can tailor it to work for you. so unless you’re somewhat advanced i would say it would be counterproductive. if you are fairly advanced a 5% increase in closing rate would be awesome. i’ll take any 1% i can get even if i pay for it early in practice.

Nice bait allmyfriendsaredead.

 

[naturalmikey]

bait?

 

[Teevster]

i’d day this pattern is unnecessary like 95% of the time and you’re probably gonna fuck it up until you can tailor it to work for you. so unless you’re somewhat advanced i would say it would be counterproductive. if you are fairly advanced a 5% increase in closing rate would be awesome. i’ll take any 1% i can get even if i pay for it early in practice.

allmyfriendsaredead,

Flagged as trolling.

This comment would have been accepted if one was totally new to pick up who did not know better. But that's not you right? And if it was, then it would have been classified as KJ (since you make assumptions not based on field experience - cuz you are rookie).

Or...

You are just trolling, because you know very well that:
- Such subjects are immersive - women love talking about such subjects (now it may be your subject of choice, and that's fine).
- Leading the conversation onto sex is always helpful since it sets a sexual frame - sexual frames are useful
- Setting a non-judgemental frame, as well as a frame of acceptance that communicates the she is allowed to be dirty and sexual (with you) as long as she feels like it, reduces potential resistance.

These are not controversial claims. And they do make up way more than 5-1% of a pick up. Those numbers are just insane and is just a way to tell a poster (me) that the material is BS and useless. You have the right to do so, but then you have to provide reasons. Which you do not. And if you did, you would have done a lot more work to do than just posting yet another post empty of content. In fact, debating against known facts is doable, but hard work - hard work you do not provide.

So, KJ or troll? I will assume just troll. But if you insist, we can go for the KJ label.

PS: Frames make up more than 1-5% of an interaction. That is pretty much universally acceptable. Additionally, this routines does more than just set frames, but I will leave that from the equation for now.

PSS: this is not nextasf allmyfriendsaredead.

 

[Teevster]

It will absolutely become part of my routines and I'll start implementing it. I'll tell you how it goes.



Agree here. I've heard you called a prodigy before. Maybe it'd be more appropriate to say prince?

I'd love read your next report, especially if this or any other more fancy gambits have been used.

I like the term prince, although I prefer being called "the Wizard" like my friends in this community call me. Me and pablo have been labelled "the warrior and the wizard".

You are right that without those frames logistics could have possibly overcome (just fuck in the common room, and don't sleep over).

We already discussed this too death but yeah...

And the goal is to get as close to the ideal as possible, accepting that reality will make that impossible (and also, unknowable in the specific sense i.e. "if I did this instead of that" or "what would they have done in response to that").

Well, as long as we have an ideal to strive for, it can motivate us. Accepting that we won't ever get there, may make it easier for us to accept that we can get there. It makes us realistic. Yet, we know we can always get better, which itself is a good frame of mind.

To me, the only time the word academic is negative, is when it's meant to mean theoretical discussions that have strayed too far from practical use (generally or from the topic at hand).

Ah, like the most popular threads on pick up forums, haha.


Best,

 

[Teevster]

Love this. I'm going to incorporate this as well, but some modifications will be made with verbiage to make it congruent for myself. Spitting it out word for word will sound rehearsed.

I agree. Just make sure you talk about the same themes and set the same frames, follow a somewhat similar progression. Honestly, It is not like I know these by heart. Every time I head out, I will most likely deliver it a bit different than the previous time and so on.

This is too true and could probably be it's own post. Being proactive in the corporate world has been a game changer for my career. Preemptively considering how co-workers and bosses will react to conflict..... I have a VP who is relentless and maintains frames like the hulk. When you go into meetings with him and are not 5 steps ahead, he will tear you apart.

Yeah. There is actually a great lecture on Machiavelli applied to business here delivered by a top professor on the subject.

have an interview with him coming up and the outcome depends on how well I can address what I know he will ask before he asks, as well as handling the numerous follow up questions.

Fortuna/proactivity is something all should look to integrate into daily life.

Great post!

Lotus

Thanks and good luck with your interview.

Best,

 

[Teevster]

After reading the post, Ive been talking a bit around about purity to get a sense of peoples frame of mind around it. And its a super loaded topic for both guys and girls.

YES! Exactly, and that's the immersive nature of this gambit - because it is a loaded topic.

Maybe even still a discursive nodal point for people - meaning its a widespread thing that significantly affect and drive a big group of peoples meaning around areas - here sexual behavior.

Exactly.

Loads of guys have the wanting of a more pure girl - the shaming ho perceptance is real in their mind, some arguing girls who sleep around cant really pair bond. Huge red flags for them. Like seriously.

Yup, and this is why, this frame presented here is so powerful, because it is libarating to women, who usually experiences the prudish frame presented by most guys.

And this is also a way to amog - i.e. discussing purity, and let the guy display bad frames (without him knowing he is doing so) while you share yours. A typical way of amogging that I like.

Quite a few girls are tense and scared around the topic, go super attentive when i slide it into convo as a statement. Moves forward. stop what theyre doing. I sense a mesh of perceptions but that it grabs their attention a lot.

Yes! it grabs the attention, and girls tense up when you bring it up. But then you give them a major release when you deliver that liberated frame. It is like a pure emotional rollercoaster. and we know how women feel about those.

I dont have a clear idea of dominants perceptances of it yet. I wouldnt call it chick crack as such but def. an attention grabber on the level of a topic like racism to bring up.

Yeah problem is that the topic of racism always gets overly political....

Best,

 

[Watts]

I'd love read your next report, especially if this or any other more fancy gambits have been used.

And I'd love to have your read my report!

Going out this weekend, hopefully will have a juicy interaction to mine for it (or even better, a lay!).

I wrote down another sexual frame, a story about an experience I had which is kind of funny / not really bragging, but shows some good frames i.e.

"I like to please my lover, I like to eat pussy (with conditions sexy and clean), I can take or leave sex, I will walk away from sex that isn't enthusiastic "

But I really like this purity one, and since I in particular seem to have to fight against the "BF/GF" frame, it's probably going to be very helpful to me.

I like the term prince, although I prefer being called "the Wizard" like my friends in this community call me. Me and pablo have been labelled "the warrior and the wizard".

Hell of a combo!

But no "King" or "Lover"? You're missing two to round out a Jungian quartet!

Well, as long as we have an ideal to strive for, it can motivate us. Accepting that we won't ever get there, may make it easier for us to accept that we can get there. It makes us realistic. Yet, we know we can always get better, which itself is a good frame of mind.

Agreed!

Ah, like the most popular threads on pick up forums, haha.

Sometimes people think they can theorize their way to the perfect pickup, with no risk of failure, instead of getting their hands dirty and burning some sets in service of the mission (consciously, or unconsciously).

I've been guilty of it too (in other domains as well). It's something to always watch for.

Truth is you gotta keep grinding out the sets! That's the only way forward!

 

[Watts]

Yup, and this is why, this frame presented here is so powerful, because it is libarating to women, who usually experiences the prudish frame presented by most guys.

And this is also a way to amog - i.e. discussing purity, and let the guy display bad frames (without him knowing he is doing so) while you share yours. A typical way of amogging that I like.

Have done this before. Can attest to it's power.

One example: A guy who was meeting my target (probably in the boyfriend interview funnel, from what I gathered) and when her friends alluded to something slutty she did and he showed interest, I said

"I don't believe in judging anything like that, what you did before you met me is none of my business. And I certainly wouldn't judge you for wanting to have a good time."

he insisted though, with a slightly judgemental attitude, and I saw a slight shift in my favor.

 

[naturalmikey]

that one pattern is unnecessary probably 95% of the time. using it i perhaps may have increased my results by 5%. i’ve never used it and have gotten really good results. therefore it is unnecessary.

i then went on to explain how patterns can be difficult to use because not everyone is advanced. a lot of the time people forget that people reading these posts have no experience delivering material like this and will likely fuck it up. i don’t understand how this would be a kj post or a troll post. just trying to simplify it for people who may not have used anything more than lines or natural game.

i actually think that using patterns in general are unnecessary. sexual frames in my opinion are necessary to get anything more than lucky. i never said otherwise.

 

[naturalmikey]

i agree with smma that all three keys: sexual, social, and emotional must be fulfilled rather explicitly or inadvertently for a woman to sleep with a man. i also believe that all three can be fulfilled inadvertently if a girl thinks you’re hot and you don’t bore the shit out of her. that’s rare so it’s best to set sexual frames, consciously emotionally stimulate, and control the social frame (although this is not always necessary if you are inherently socially acceptable which is normally the case for a lot of guys. in this case the social frame is already set and trying to control it can seem try hard)

 

[naturalmikey]

oh an i am allmyfriends are dead. i was notasaprocky on rsdnation. my name is field. i’m 37 years old. i live in venice ca and i hang out on abbott kinney and main street. nothing to hide.

 

[Velasco]

i actually think that using patterns in general are unnecessary. sexual frames in my opinion are necessary to get anything more than lucky. i never said otherwise.

You said his pattern (a gambit he shared to show guys how to talk about sex pretty early in your interactions via a smooth transition (I'd include asking her first what she looks for in a guy so that she'll return the question back to you) saying something controversial that will allow him to explain what he means by seeking female purity (not something your average joe would answer to "what do you look for in a girl"). Which any guy looking to set sexual frames (which we all agree are necessary to get anything more than lucky) very early on in their interactions (rather than spending 30-40 minutes with her fluff talking before doing so (which by that point usually happens by accident)) can learn how to do)) is unnecessary and counterproductive. And pulled this 5% increase in your closing rate out of your ass (setting a sexual frame very early on VS late in the interaction does not result in a 5% increase that you will close any girl). Which is why he accused you of KJ.

If you've got a gambit/pattern that you use to set a sexual + nonjudgemental frame very early on in your interactions. Then feel free to share. This is his way of doing so.