- Joined
- Aug 12, 2024
- Messages
- 141
Texting is uncharted territory for me. I am treating this as a learning experience; I refuse to give up on her without testing tactics or trying to fix mistakes.
I used the "Good morning
" recommended by @Skills and @Bob Z and got a convo going for about an hour. Y'all saved me from the harmful PUA texting mentality.
She goes quiet everytime I indicate we meet up. This time, she didn't even reply to my ping. I feel out of my element when I can't see nonverbals.
Since she didn't respond to my "Good morning" on Friday, I intend to message her again for maybe the last time on Sunday to arrange a meet-up when I come back to campus on Monday.
The Setup
Tuesday: I got a number from cold approaching for the first time.
Long story short: We met on campus (both students, not classmates). She wanted me to text her immediately to ensure I wrote her number correctly. I asked her to text me when she got home, and she complied and we texted. I then sent an uncalibrated soft close that someone said conveyed "Let's fuck". No reply.
Wednesday: No reply.
Thursday: Thanks to Skills, I got a conversation with her over text.
Tuesday: I got a number from cold approaching for the first time.
Long story short: We met on campus (both students, not classmates). She wanted me to text her immediately to ensure I wrote her number correctly. I asked her to text me when she got home, and she complied and we texted. I then sent an uncalibrated soft close that someone said conveyed "Let's fuck". No reply.
Wednesday: No reply.
Thursday: Thanks to Skills, I got a conversation with her over text.
I used the "Good morning
" recommended by @Skills and @Bob Z and got a convo going for about an hour. Y'all saved me from the harmful PUA texting mentality.Our conversation went like:
- I woke up tired and sent the text without much hope.
- She responded 3 minutes later. In fact, she kept responding quickly. It took me about twice as long to respond to her at any point, but my responses were longer.
- Granted she always moved the conversation and we texted almost the same in total.
- I didn't use emojis beyond the opener. I had perfect grammar and spelling.
She goes quiet everytime I indicate we meet up. This time, she didn't even reply to my ping. I feel out of my element when I can't see nonverbals.
What we said:
- Opening ping: "Good morning "
- Started Raw: I asked about her second week ever at the university and asked if she broke any rules. She said "surprisingly not yet" and her week was shitty.
- I forgot something she said: I asked if it was because art class was full of snobs (we kept joking about that in our first encounter), forgetting that the class wasn't this semester. I apologize and circle back to her constantly sketching, then switched the subject to the school's foam sword fighting club.
- I show her something unique: She 'played along' not knowing it was real despite being "a little shy around strangers" but how she'd do it "in a heartbeat if [my] friends were involved". I asked if this was her way of asking me to go with her, but she instead excitedly asked about the club meetings after realizing it was real.
- High note: I joke about her stress management class scamming her if they didn’t tell her about that club, then suggested she give me the tuition money instead. She laugh and considered it, then said, "well i was hoping to check out some other clubs </3". I said if she was brave enough to talk to a random handsome stranger who approached her, she was brave enough to join any club that involved getting stabbed (with foam). She once again brought up logistics because she questioned her ability to commit to commuting that long for that club.
- Good times end: I asked if her weeks were that exhausting and she vented with a wall of text. I just expressed sympathy and tried cheering her up with a joke.
- Uh-oh: I asked if anything positive happened, she mentioned good food and friends.
- FU: I guess I got freaked out by her mentioning friends, so I hesitate a couple minutes then soft close, "We should celebrate the good times."
- Time to move on?: No response for 8 minutes so I excuse myself, "I gotta head back to work. Talk to you later?" Not sure why I said "head back" as I hadn't left home before opening. She wished me luck and I teased, "That means something coming from the girl with the worst luck this week so far."
- Over one hour of texting.
Since she didn't respond to my "Good morning
" on Friday, I intend to message her again for maybe the last time on Sunday to arrange a meet-up when I come back to campus on Monday.Questions:
1. Am I moving too slow now and mossing escalation windows?
2. Am I missing opportunities to flirt and let this enter a friendly frame?
3. How's my style, is it too stiff? I've always presented myself as the 'mature intellectual' type since I was a kid but a friend recommended I abbreviate and reply with '
' more often.
4. Am I headed to the friendzone? Why do my soft closes keep failing?
1. Am I moving too slow now and mossing escalation windows?
2. Am I missing opportunities to flirt and let this enter a friendly frame?
3. How's my style, is it too stiff? I've always presented myself as the 'mature intellectual' type since I was a kid but a friend recommended I abbreviate and reply with '
' more often.4. Am I headed to the friendzone? Why do my soft closes keep failing?
