FR SuppleCheeks

[Marty]

I cold-approached a girl on a park bench in her lunch-break, sat down next to her, went direct. I told her she had the loveliest brunette hair... it really was. We built rapport for maybe 5 min. I asked her on a date, she declined. She said she had a BF and it "wouldn't be appropriate, though I'd have loved to otherwise". I persisted, told her I was also attached and there needn't be any serious expectations, we'd just see how things played out.

She said okay, give me your contact details. No way am I falling for that one, I get out my phone and ask her how long she's been dating. She says a year and a half. I hand her my phone and tell her to punch in her number.

There is a lot of fiddling around, I begin to wonder what's going on. Eventually she pings her finger off the screen in a "that's it!" gesture and hands back the phone.

She's saved her number with first name and even company name, as she points out when I remark on her efforts. No doubt so I won't confuse her with all the other girls I've approached by the same name;-) I've never had any girl do this before.

We say goodbye and she moves to hug me, but as you may know I don't tolerate hugging when I have romantic interest in a woman; I cheek-kiss her instead. When she sees this coming, she gives a little "Oh!" of surprise but proffers her cheek willingly.

I've sent an icebreaker... no response. When I text in an attempt to set up the date, I might write "you have the softest, most supple cheek I've ever kissed". (It's true.) Or would that be supplicatory?

 

[Gentle_Phrases]

Heyyyy Marty Friedman!

I don't see where you're getting all this time to game girls. You should be selling out stadiums and flicking your tongue at young groupies..

Anyhoo, I feel as though sending her a text like one of these:

"I want to kiss the bottom of your shoe."

or

"Piss on me!"

would be far more "supplicative." Maybe your text could easily work, considering that you so nonchalantly swiped away her boyfriend objection and then she complied with follow up information and a desperate lunge for your manly torso: she's expecting you to be rather bold is my best guess. Besides she might enjoy a little Casanova flair so she has a more juicy story to tell when she inevitably shares with her friends every graphic detail.

You might want to add "p.s. newly homeless" for that added sexy loser effect, just in case.

Kidding.

Honestly, I don't know anything, mate. Im a spacemonkey. At least this will now be bumped up so someone else might answer for your future reference. Also, please update if you did send that response or something like it ...I'm interested to hear how it all goes down (pinky promise I wont gossip).

G.

 

[Marty]

Gentle Phrases:

1. I don't take my handle from Marty Friedman, but from Marty Estel, crime boss in one of Raymond Chandler's novels. But you knew that, of course. ;-)

2. I am renowned for my lack of sense of humor. I don't mean disapproval, High Court judge-style; nor do I mean I can't make people laugh, on the contrary people generally laugh appreciatively at my jokes. No, I mean I actually often don't get other people's jokes and can't always tell whether they're joking or serious!

I get the sense that there's a combination of lightheartedness and sincerity in your response, but in view of my failing as outlined above, you might wish to consider rewriting it in the style you would normally use for, say, a visitor from afar with limited grasp of English stylistic humor, and I might have a sporting chance at getting your drift. You dig?

Thanks,
Marty