The Slob

[foggy]

I want to share with you guys a thought process I use that motivates me to push past my comfort zone with women.

We’ve all seen a guy who was unconfident, embarrassingly unattractive and socially awkward. A guy who was covered in acne, had poor posture and an atrocious $10 haircut, walked in this super weird way, and was wearing clothes that were 4 times too big for him. You could just tell he was a virgin and would rather eat hot shards of glass than risk getting rejected by a woman. I call him The Slob.

I bet it would PISS YOU OFF if someone said you acted the same way as The Slob. You’re not even remotely close to him in any way, shape or form…right?

Well…not so fast. I am here to tell you that you might be behaving like The Slob. Let me explain.

Let’s say you’ve just spotted this gorgeous woman and you were planning to walk up to her and say hello, but now you’re second guessing yourself. Approach anxiety is getting in the way.

When this happens, stop what you’re doing, visualize The Slob, and think this:

Would The Slob go up to this woman and say hello?

NO, he wouldn’t.

This means that if you don't open this woman then you’re doing the exact same thing The Slob would do in this situation. You’re behaving like The Slob!

But you don’t want to behave like The Slob, right? Right. So go say hello. Still can’t muster up the guts? You’re no better than The Slob, till the next woman you approach at least.

 

[readjusting]

Interesting.
My thought is quite the opposite:
"Would the gift for women behave that way? Hell no."
So I visualize the Casanova rather than the Slob

 

[Bboy100]

First of all, this is false. Lots of guys who are otherwise socially adept and overall attractive have a difficult time opening random girls and do plenty of other things which a slob might also do. As such, there are plenty of behaviors which not limited to just this "slob" character. Hell, I'm sure even Casanova and slobs share certain character traits. This is like saying "Oh shit, I'm eating food! I better not do that cause a slob would do that!" Obviously, this I ridiculous.

More importantly, associating your behavior with someone you don't want to be/don't see in a positive light is not a very psychologically healthy strategy. Great way to decrease self-esteem and create a variety of other problems. I wouldn't recommend this strategy for everyone

But hey, experience is the best, most accurate teacher. So if this has been working for you so far, keep at it!