- Joined
- Dec 8, 2013
- Messages
- 58
Hey guys. I just went downtown for the weekend for a friends birthday (its a girl and her friend. I made it a point to not make any more female friends, but im not attracted to them and they provide fun times and social options) and decided to get as much experience and practice from it as I could from the situation. I had series of interactions and a date that worked out on the last day. I have a couple sticking points i'm still working as you can see in the date. I'm really open to any critique or outside perspectives on how I can tighten up my game and deal with certain things better.
Quick Note: One of the things im working on is being more bold about my sexual interest and intentions early on (in a non needy way, hopefully without putting them on a pedestal). Im super bold and dominant once I know that they are interested and there is a 90% chance I wont get rejected, but I struggle with being bold and sexual with girls right from the get go before I know if they feel the same way about me. In the past i've wanted to try this kind of stuff out but I know because im not experienced in this stuff it will probably come off a bit awkward or unsmooth at first, and I will have to deal with some kinds of resistance and responses I have never gotten before. I used to value the outcome if each situation more than getting better which stopped me from doing this. After reading about being unashamed and open about your desires in colts articles, I decided to really push it this weekend and break character.
So before I went down there I made an effort on bringing a girl to the party with me and working things out logistically so it would give me a great opportunity to work a seduction at the end. If it fails then at least ill have other girls to work with. There was this really cute asian girl who worked at the same job that me and birthday girl (we will call her BG) did. She started there just before I quit and was doing all kinds of chasing towards me. This was before I started reading this site and I did not capitalize on it at all. She would make nervous attempts to come talk to me all the time (which I rewarded with positive reinforcement), she always had a flirty vibe towards me and said I was gorgeous to my face once, and said she wanted to party with me. I never got her number (cause I was an idiot) and she added me on facebook shortly after I quit. I thought I would take a long shot at taking her with me to the party cause “why not”. In my experience hitting up an old girl who you used to have a dynamic with you out of nowhere later on is a pretty low percentage thing, but here is how it went. I tried to come off as non needy, spontaneous, and playfully persistent in my vibe, but really focus on leading and defusing any objections she could have. This girl will be referred to as -E-
Me: Hey E. You still work at cantina by any chance?
E: Hey B, no whats up?
Me: Oh, why'd you decide to make the change? And I was asking cause im gonna be up north on friday hanging with some friends, but later on im going to BG's birthday party at her place. If you are looking for something to do and you're still cool with the people there you should come along. We never got to party
E: I'm supposed to babysit all night on Friday but if anything changes I'll let u know!
Me: Great! We should take the kids along with us, im sure they would have an awesome time : )
E: Haha absolutely. But u would have to take care of them while I get drunk lol
E: Btw where do you live now?
Me: Hey, I cant make any promises now. I dont know how wild you get haha. And im going to (school) in (location) right now.
(I wish I said “im not really daddy material” instead of “i dont know how wild you get” but whatever)
E: Cool I go to (school). What yr are you? And I live off of (train stop). Near by the lake
(here I try to avoid getting wrapped up in any long conversation over text conversation)
Me: Thats a nice place to live, you must really enjoy that. And Im a junior right now. Heres the thing. At the moment im busy with a lot of work I got due for tomorrow, but it'd be cool to get to know each other in person like this sometime. I tell you what. Drop me your number and ill give you the details about things on friday. That way if your schedule frees up or if you have a change of heart, us two quitters can go together : )
E: (phone number)
(shes responding to my stuff pretty fast so I send an ice breaker on the phone so she gets my number like 15 minutes later)
Me: it was cool catching up - B
(no response to this)
I was a little nervous when I got into this text conversation (im always nervous at the beginning stages of anything with a girl if im completely initiating) and I could have done a little bit better. Some of my longer massages look SO much longer that hers in the chat bar (worse than it looks on here) and it could have came off a bit overwhelming. Also I could have tried to tease a bit tease investment from her and get a vibe going instead of trying to mechanically force things immediately. I don't know. At least I lead the interaction and tried to move fast and not beat around the bush. I wasn't expecting too much from it though.
I meet up with BG and her friend at this bar for a while and then we head out to go get stuff set up at their place. We are on the way to their house and BG and her friend were asking if I want to invite anyone for later. I casually told them I invited E and they were really surprised by this. They told me how after I left that she didn't get along with everyone there and they fired her for being on her phone too much. I see now why she just kind of ignored the “what decided you to make the change?” question. BG's friend and E had some pretty serious drama. Once we get to the house, it is pretty far from any public trans and is in kind of a Ghetto area (not too bad though). I decide just not to contact E or give her details on the party.
I wrote up what happened at the party, but it was like 5 pages in word single spaced, so i decided to cut it out and get to the important stuff. All that happened was I had a girl who i was doing well with but wasn't that attracted to and would have tanked my reputation in the social circle if i laid her. I politely and kindly missed a lot of windows she threw at me. Also there was this hot latina i was talking to most of the night, but she had a really possesive and confrontational "hood" guy she was "talking to" so it was hard to make any progress. After the two of those girls left i just chilled with friends and got pretty drunk and high.
I don't normally get wild like this and abuse alcohol or drugs but I decided to drink more and have my first edible on top of all the weed I already smoked. I never get too stupid and belligerent when im super under the influence, but at this point im getting a little silly as I am extremely high and drunk at the same time. At the end of the night (like 4 something in the morning) im laying down on a blow up mattress in the living room, I am having a really awesome body high, and I get a message on the phone in my pocket. I look at it and is the asian girl “E” texting me. I chuckle a bit cause I really didn't expect this, especially this late. I know now that I am in the drivers seat and just have to play it cool. I really dont give a fuck about what I say to her at this point and im just pretty flat out and “whatever” with her. I have a lot of trouble hitting in the right fucking keys and typing coherent messages but I kept it together. Here is how it went down.
E: Hey how was the party
Me: good, im kinda messed up. How was the babysitting?
E: Haha someone's having fun ;p it was aight. Nothing too crazy
ME: wow you just got done babysitting at 4 am. What kinda family do you work for?
E: This single mom is kinda crazy she just got back all drunk lol
E: But I only live a couple blocks away from her so it's not too bad
Me: Oh well thats cool, money to chill nextdoor I guess right.
E: yep and I just sip on some wine when the kids go to bed haha
Me: Lol that sounds really chill. Ur a great nanny
E: (blank message)
I wait a little while
Me: What are you doin still up this late?
E: I actually just got home
Me: Wow thats crazy
E: What r u doing
me: Trying to stay conscious
me: what are you doing
E: watching modern family
Me: that sounds cool
E: It's the best show. Haha are you going back today?
Me: no im staying down for another day or two
(even though I really dont know what the fuck im doing)
E: whats ur plan for today
me: might meet up with some friend from college
me: You?
E: I have a friends bday party around 11pm but I was hoping to get to see u for a bit!
(nice)
Me: sounds good. When were you thinking?
E: We can do either late lunch or dinner. What do u think
Me: dinners cool
E: ok how about 6?
(a couple more messages working out the details but It was close to her apartment)
Me: K see ya then
E: Ok night!
Me: Night
Im pretty happy as I go to bed because I didn't expect to get this opportunity. Anyway I wake up the next day and I have seriously underestimated how much I drank the last night and the edible I had didn't really help either. I felt terrible like I had an aneurism in the right side of my brain. I threw up all the bile in my stomach 3 separate times the next day like I had food poisoning or something (I never get sick the night of, the morning after is rough though). Im making it a promise to myself to not let this happen again for a long time as it wont help me push myself in seduction at all. I spent most of the day just drinking as much water and laying down, still on the couch in BG's living room. E texts me and asks me to do 7pm now at another bar thats closer to her house (I could use the extra time to recover, and later and closer to her place is always better). I text her thats cool and im not in a rush. I take a shower and im able to fully recover by about 6 pm. Surprisingly I still look pretty good and no one would be able to tell I fucking wrecked myself the night before.
I grab a ride back downtown with BG and her boyfriend who's taking her out to a concert at the house of blues for her birthday. I part ways with them there and walk the rest of the way up to this bar which is a decently long way. I get there on time tho and take a little look around the bar and shes not there yet. So I give E a call. She picks up and I focus on being warm and relaxed right from the start. I tell her I just found the place and she tells me that shes almost there and that we should grab a spot at the bar. I say thats cool. She seems warm and comfortable on the phone and is receptive to the kind of flirty tone im using. I hang up and go grab a spot at the bar for the two of us and I start making some fun small talk with the girl tending the bar so that when E sees me, she gets a better image than me sitting waiting there awkwardly on my phone. After a little while I hear her greet me from behind. I casually turn around and smile. I give her a hug and a response to the first thing she says. I look at her and tell her that she looks great (focusing on trying out being really flirty and direct on this date). She smiles and says thank you. She sits down and asks me how the party went. I honestly tell her that I had a lot to drink and smoked a lot and had an edible for the first time and I got pretty wrecked (I leave out the part about me throwing up the next day and stuff). She asks me if I smoke weed a lot and I honestly tell her that its a very occasional thing for me. She tells me that she never smokes at all (this comes into play later) but likes to drink and stuff. I ask her how the babysitting went and use that as a topic to transition into deep diving. I ask her how she got into babysitting and if she likes kids and stuff (not too seriously like im screening for mother material or anything). This girl was very easy to open up and really got into everything I asked her (I hit most of chases 8 questions). I maintained the 80% her 20% me ratio pretty much exactly.
(Everything below up until the point does not happen in chronological order up until the pull. It all kind of interweaved so i separated it into different categories)
The only thing she really knows about me after the night is over is the basic stuff I tell girls. She knows where I go to school and what I study, and when she asks me about what MY goals are in life I tell her that I value different things than most people. I say that im not all about spending the next 40 years working an office job to amass wealth only so I can buy a better house or a better TV while in the meantime im getting old doing the same thing every day that I dont love. And then when im old and look back I only had one stable stage of my life that lasted 30 years. I would rather travel and live in different locations, become worldly, and have a lot of different stages in my life and grow as a person. And I know that this lifestyle would cause me to live hand to mouth sometimes and would rule out building a family, but its worth it to me. That when im old I look back I know I lived a very rich and full life and taken everything that this world has to offer instead of breaking my back building up a pile of financial wealth when im just going to grown old and die shortly anyway.
Obviously I dont explain it this in depth and look like a try hard. But this is the basic message I try to convey as a way to get her in a spontaneous, live life by the moment mood, while also disqualifying myself from boyfriend material. I made it a point to say during the babysitting thing that im not really a kids guy, its not that I dont like kids or anything. I just don't wanna cuddle them in my arms and treasure them. I just kinda see them as little people and that I dont really see myself being a father. Anyway during the time when I was explaining my view on life she was really smiling and responding positively to this. It seemed to bring her in a better mood and she totally understood my view on things.
About ten minutes in I commented on the clothes she was wearing. This girl had a great sense of style. She was wearing some very mature and professional looking stuff that also showed off her figure and was wearing some very minimal cool jewelry and bracelets. I said she looked very professional and she laughed and told me how to her this is causal wear for her or whatever. I told her she looked cute with a smile. A little bit later she told me how people think she is often older than she is and comes off more mature. I told her I noticed that before and I find that sexy. She laughed and surprisingly responded with a “Oh well... thank you!” while she looked away (Maybe a little too direct? Time to pull it back a bit). She does feed off of this a little later on and asks me “why I decided to get in contact with her” (in a good way though) I responded with “I just felt like it” I told her as she can probably see im a little up front and bold with people. She responds to this positively and goes on to ask me. . “Do you ever just go up to girls and tell them their cute and talk to them” (basically asking me if I do cold approach... interesting). I tell her “Yea, if im in a spontaneous mood and the girl is cute”. I go on to playfully ask her if she ever seduces guys. She says that yea, that she is pretty bold too sometimes with guys and her friends wonder how she can do stuff like that. I say something positive about this.
During this time I was really trying to turn her on and get a spark going with my non-verbals and body language. During the serious deep diving points I connected with her and cooled it a bit. But during the other positive conversation I just stared at her in the left eye and imagined taking off her clothes in my mind and us having sex together (I could multitask and still hold the conversation well enough). My breathing was a little bit faster and a looked down at her lips while she was talking to me a lot. It seemed like she caught my eye and could tell what was going on in my head, but she never responded with the same kind of lustful focus. She didn't seem rejective towards it or give me any shit tests like “why are you looking at me like that” I also had my body turned towards hers and she was turned a bit towards me, and both of our legs were touching each other. When I would make points or be playful with her I would nudge her a little with my leg. I didn't do so much leaning over and touching her with my hands. Besides hugging her I didn't touch her with my hands much at all (should have just done it). She was staying positive though and asked me if I was single and I told her yes. She also at one point went on about herself and how she is now a promo girl for this whiskey company and gets paid 40 dollars an hour to stand around and be friendly. I try to just be chill about it and say “yea, thats pretty good money”. She goes on to tell me how they hired her because she is an asian girl but she does not exactly have an asian body (shes basically trying to tell me to my face that shes so sexy, so thats good I guess). She's right, this little girl has a fucking killer body on her that I want to ravage so badly. She constantly runs and works out, mainly to get away from some emotional pain ill describe below. She goes on to tell me hows she has been groped by creepy guys and shit while shes doing this job and I stay pretty unresponsive to that.
On the deep diving. Like I mentioned before I got this girl to completely open up very easily. She told me about how she was born in Korea and she was sent over here at a really young age. Technically she is an orphan but her family over in Korea still pays for everything for her from over there. The thing is that they barely talk and she can only see her parents once in a long time (last time was like 3 years ago). She tells me that the parents pay for so much of her stuff and spend so much money on her that she doesn't understand why they didn't want to keep her in their life (this is true, this girl lives in the nicest most expensive area of Chicago and has her own apartment by the lake. From living downtown myself, I can tell you that the price of that would be pretty lucrative, especially for a girl her age. I really wanted to join her back at her place to check it out and do other fun activities). She gets pretty emotional about this and goes on to ask me if I ever struggle with depression. I tell her I did a bit when I was younger but shifted it back on her and asked her why shes depressed (chemical, or thought pattern). She tells me its because she gets so lonely. I think that its good the way she is opening up to me but she is getting sad so I make a joke or change the subject to something else (flirty or fun) every now and then but delve back into this soon after.
She goes on talking about her family in Korea and her white family that adopted her in Virginia a bit more. I try not to play therapist to much and be like “it's okay baby ill make you feel better. Instead I try to stay just curious about it and listen to her and not get emotional about it. I tell her that "thats too bad" and that I find her story really fascinating. Here im thinking im making headway and bonding in a way that not a lot of other people do with her. But when I tell her that her story is very interesting she responds with “Yea, so many people say that”. I guess depressed people spill their shit on anyone who will take the time to listen to you to try and ease their pain (I used to be like this when I was depressed). I ask her what makes her the most happy in life. She says she likes to help people and told me this story about how she pushed this lady in a wheel chair around a super market and and some other stuff like that. I ask her if she ever thought of making a living out of this and doing something like being the head of hospitality at a hospital or doing work over in other struggling countries, or charity and stuff like that. She tells me maybe later on in life, but right now shes to busy being young and having fun. She goes on to tell me that everyone in both of her families are super christian and she kind of believes it, but it is something she will rely on later on in life. She says how all of her friends and family think she is such a good girl (I like where this is headed). I playfully ask her “why... are you, not a “good girl” with a sexy smile. She tells me she likes to drink and have fun and party but doesn't hint at anything sexual. This is how most of the deep diving went with some moments in between where she brought up other topics about movies and how she loves comedies and that “nacho libre” is her favorite movie. She brings up other shit like disney movies and I ask her whats her favorite 90s disney movie. I said “little mermaid” cause human ariel has a bangin body. She said “cinderella” or some really weak shit like that. I know this isn't super smooth stuff buts its how I keep conversation going while I try to find another good conversation thread.
At one point she asked me if I told BG who was hanging out yesterday about her and how we are hanging out. I thought this would be a great time to show her I was low key. So I responded by telling her honestly that no, I didn't tell anyone about what I was meeting up with her. I thought this was good because they told me how E got fired and that they all hate her so much. Im surprised when she goes on and doesn't respond well to this. She tells me she doesn't like it with guys in her life don't give details about anything and are very vague about stuff. She tells me how I sound like a “typical guy” I act like she is going off the handle a bit weird and tell her that I don't try to keep secrets from anyone, I just keep most of my life to myself and the people I share experiences with and don't advertise everything to everyone. Maybe this was a competition thing and she wanted BG who she had drama with to know I was hanging with her, I dont know. Then she goes on to tell me how people walk away from her in life (mainly guys). I talk about how I don't understand how some guys are like that and whatever (maybe I was a bit direct and looked like I was qualifying to her).
Anyway all this stuff above happened together at the same time and was kind of wove in together. Its not chronological, I just separated it out into different categories so im not jumping around all over the place. Everything after this is chronological.
So we have both been there for a while and have finished most of our food. The mood is positive at this point. I look at my phone and mention how I have an hour or two until I have to make my train back home. And I decide to run a yes ladder for the first time. So I ask her
Me: So are you having a good time hangin out right now?
Shes says yes with a smile
ME: do you like cinematic adventures (movies)?
shes says yes and is still smiling
ME: how bout we chill and watch a movie together until I have to go leave for my train.
Her face kinda changes and she asks me where we are going to do this
Me: Well do you have a tv at your place. (I try to be very casual and not make this a big deal at all)
shes like oh my place is really messy and im really self conscious about it. I tell her that im not a clean freak myself and im not goin to judge her for it. Its no big deal. She struggles a bit after this and then says that she just doesn't have people over this soon. But then she say that maybe we could do her place next time (ok, not bad... but i live an hour and a half away and i come down here only every so often). I say “so when you say "no"... you really mean “Yes” right?” I say this in a very playful way with a smile. She just smiles and says “...No!” with a little bit of a smart ass tone. Here I just chuckle and try to act like this doesn't affect me at all but I have to work on this a bit more (I think I broke eye contact down and to the right). So I try to just change to a frame where I thinks its kinda weird that shes too afraid to hang out and watch a movie with me for like an hour. I tell her I don't see what the big deal is but if shes really uncomfortable with that then we can go to Starbucks (which she suggested). I figured we could just go there and I would try to make her more comfortable and bring her back to her place. But heres where things start to go poorly.
I can't remember for some reason if this happened before or after the pull. I think the first half happened while she was talking about guys walking away from her. Then went back onto it after the failed pull. It might have all happened after the failed pull, but here is what happened.
She tells me she has a question for me. Im like “sure okay”. She then goes on to spill to me about this older guy she is “talking to” right now and how he said he wasn't ready for something serious right now because he just dumped his old girlfriend. But him and E have been seeing each other. She tells me how she made him wait for a while but now he has slept over with her like 4 or 5 times. Im like (oh fuck!... not this agaaaain) in my head. But I just try to act like my attention is drifting and I dont really care. The thing is she goes on and on and on about it. She asks me if hes going to commit and what is going on with him right now. I know playing mister advice giver is not the way into a girls pants. Eventually I just say “do you want me to be your life coach now” with a chuckle and a smile. I then say “I can't tell you what to do with your life, do what makes you happy”. She cools it a little and we are walking to starbucks and she brings up another guy “mike” from our old work. Mike is an amazing natural and I enjoy seeing him in action. She tells me now how mike came home with her one night and they smoked weed together (I thought she said that she doesn't take anyone home right away or smoke weed... this is what I find so interesting about naturals). Anyway she was telling me how he tried to fuck her while she was really drunk and she got so mad at him about it. Im assuming he probably did fuck her if she let him do the other stuff. And that she is mad because he got played. She seems to be bringing this up in a way like “you better not be trying to do this to me” I try to just look very uninterested while she is going on about this but she wont stop. So I just say in a surprised way “wow... you are very open about this stuff”. She then shuts down and tells me maybe she shouldn't have said that stuff. I tell her that I don't judge her for it.
This is a problem I get pretty often, and the pattern goes like this. Cute girl likes me and shows me a ton of attraction signs and asks ME out most of the time. We go on the date and I run things similar like you read above just deep diving, creating a spark, and trying to do a casual pull at the end of the night. The whole time they are responding well and things are going decently well, but after I try to pull or at a transition point, or even before the pull out of nowhere sometimes, they tell me how they are “talking to” or basically fucking this 30 something year old restaurant owner, night club staff guy, lawyer, business man, or just how they are dealing with some really good, older natural who is fucking them right now. This has gotten pretty annoying the more ive encountered it. I can't exactly fuck girls a decade younger than me because then I would be fucking 11 year olds and I would go to jail. Hell at my age I couldn't even do high school girls without looking like a creep or getting thrown in jail. I guess I welcome it as a challenge and I have to turn myself into fucking top tier lover material. I just don't understand where its coming from as they show all kinds of interest and ask ME out usually, especially when the date seems to be going fairly well (im no master yet but i feel i do well and devour all the information on this site and utilize it).
Anyway we get to Starbucks and the sexual mood is killed. I see now that it is brighter in here that she is wearing a fucking see through shirt and I definitely would have called her out on putting that on for me earlier in the night... but now, not so much. She goes to the bathroom, gets her tea and sits down with me. Now im just chilling and she is carrying the converstion. But she is showing me pictures of her white Virginia siblings on the phone talking about her gay bff's and how the boys behind me have cute hair. Im just chilling trying to look unaffected. After a while she says how shes going to take a nap before she goes out for her friends bday at the club later that night. I say something about how I have the best dreams when I nap. She goes on and talks about a recurring dream she has where her korean mother leaves her alone on a bus and that she thinks its because of the way her family life is going. She gets really into this and almost starts crying, I decide to lighten the mood a bit by telling her about the only recurring dream I had when I was younger where I get attacked by a vampire in a blockbuster video store (thought this would fit in with her nacho libre humor). Her face lights up and she has a really good laugh at this and it puts her in much happier mood. The conversation goes a bit better for the rest of the time but its still pretty platonic. I tell her that that its about time for me to go and we both head out and I hug her good bye. She seems like she is expecting me to walk with her for a bit but I tell her im going the other way to grab a cab. Im afraid hanging around with her and doing shit with her right now will just further place me in the friends zone.
Anyway I was upset with how things turned out at the end and things definitely didn't end on a good note. I wanted to text her to get some positve vibes going to give her a better last impression to think of. I knew that I couldnt say anything sexual in this case, and saying some shit about how I had I good time would be weak. So I sent something I thought would remind her of a time where she really laughed and had fun, and remind her about how much she opened up to me. I sent this to her almost an hour later
Me: I can't believe I opened up and told you about my blockbuster vampire dream. I feel so vulnerable right now haha
Her: Haha no worries. I had fun!
(think the sarcasm might have went over her head a bit)
Me: Good : )
(some girls used this one me and I felt it provided positive vibes without being too needy. But now I look back it might be positive reinforcement for her being platonic. I dont know)
if you saw from my last FR++, I really want to get more experience tackling hard LMR. But unfortunately I didn't get to do that this time. This girl was pretty sexy and I wanted to bang too.
Things I learned and could have done different/ what you guys can teach me on
1. First thing I have to do is when a girl brings up other guys I have to try and just obliterate it immediately. From now on when is see this stuff im going to immediately put on a big smile and chuckle as I say “Did you ask me out just so you could get my relationship advice?” or something like that. Ill experiment with my words. What would be good to do here guys?
2. I really over estimate my value and get too confident when hot girls show me great signs. I think I can just play it cool and just easily sweep them off their feet. These girls get hit on a whole lot and you really have to stand out from the pack of guys who are attracted to them (all guys) because high value girls are really selective about their mates. Usually all girls want to date up and I have to set myself a little above them and bit a bit more challenging. This girl was fucking all over me at work, but once i told her how sexy she was at the date and gave her obvious signs, she didnt invest in me as much. I should have done more teasing and trying to get her to chase. If I could go back I would tell her (without it being to harsh) that BG told me she got fired from the job and that she had a lot of drama with most of the people there. This would immediately put me in a superior position and she would have to explain to me why she is not a lazy worker who got fired, and why she is not a bad person who most people hate. This would have also made it harder for her to challenge me and say no to me if I maintained this frame.
3. Lastly this girl obviously is going through a lot of emotional hardship and depression, and she is really emotionally needy. Because of this shes not down for 1 night stands and is always looking for guys to commit and she gets really bitter and upset when they don't. She seemed really sensitive and was really fast to bring up her guard at the end. From now on, if the girl is not very sexually liberated or down for a hook up, im really going to try to fly under the radar and combine that with step 2. hopefully if I get them chasing and investing in me, and my fundamentals are good and im only doing the lightest teasing but more focusing on having a fun time... hopefully when I try to pull or move things to a seduction location, they will be down because they are investing in ME, and they don't think im going to try and fuck them. Then once I get there alone, I build sexual tension, kiss them, and just try to chip away to see if I can lay them. Then if its going well but they aren't ready for sex, ill try to do it on another day when they will be a bit more comfortable. At least this way I got out of the platonic friend zone the first time, and I don't fail going for sex early and fuck everything up.
What do you guys think? Should I try to hit up this girl again the next time im downtown and try to apply this stuff?
I know that I was very long and descriptive, but hopefully you can see really clearly how I run things and how things went. Any of you guys see any things that I can work on or do better? How can I tighten up my game and where do you guys think some of these struggles come from?
And do you agree with the lessons I learned and how i'm adapting?
Quick Note: One of the things im working on is being more bold about my sexual interest and intentions early on (in a non needy way, hopefully without putting them on a pedestal). Im super bold and dominant once I know that they are interested and there is a 90% chance I wont get rejected, but I struggle with being bold and sexual with girls right from the get go before I know if they feel the same way about me. In the past i've wanted to try this kind of stuff out but I know because im not experienced in this stuff it will probably come off a bit awkward or unsmooth at first, and I will have to deal with some kinds of resistance and responses I have never gotten before. I used to value the outcome if each situation more than getting better which stopped me from doing this. After reading about being unashamed and open about your desires in colts articles, I decided to really push it this weekend and break character.
So before I went down there I made an effort on bringing a girl to the party with me and working things out logistically so it would give me a great opportunity to work a seduction at the end. If it fails then at least ill have other girls to work with. There was this really cute asian girl who worked at the same job that me and birthday girl (we will call her BG) did. She started there just before I quit and was doing all kinds of chasing towards me. This was before I started reading this site and I did not capitalize on it at all. She would make nervous attempts to come talk to me all the time (which I rewarded with positive reinforcement), she always had a flirty vibe towards me and said I was gorgeous to my face once, and said she wanted to party with me. I never got her number (cause I was an idiot) and she added me on facebook shortly after I quit. I thought I would take a long shot at taking her with me to the party cause “why not”. In my experience hitting up an old girl who you used to have a dynamic with you out of nowhere later on is a pretty low percentage thing, but here is how it went. I tried to come off as non needy, spontaneous, and playfully persistent in my vibe, but really focus on leading and defusing any objections she could have. This girl will be referred to as -E-
Me: Hey E. You still work at cantina by any chance?
E: Hey B, no whats up?
Me: Oh, why'd you decide to make the change? And I was asking cause im gonna be up north on friday hanging with some friends, but later on im going to BG's birthday party at her place. If you are looking for something to do and you're still cool with the people there you should come along. We never got to party
E: I'm supposed to babysit all night on Friday but if anything changes I'll let u know!
Me: Great! We should take the kids along with us, im sure they would have an awesome time : )
E: Haha absolutely. But u would have to take care of them while I get drunk lol
E: Btw where do you live now?
Me: Hey, I cant make any promises now. I dont know how wild you get haha. And im going to (school) in (location) right now.
(I wish I said “im not really daddy material” instead of “i dont know how wild you get” but whatever)
E: Cool I go to (school). What yr are you? And I live off of (train stop). Near by the lake
(here I try to avoid getting wrapped up in any long conversation over text conversation)
Me: Thats a nice place to live, you must really enjoy that. And Im a junior right now. Heres the thing. At the moment im busy with a lot of work I got due for tomorrow, but it'd be cool to get to know each other in person like this sometime. I tell you what. Drop me your number and ill give you the details about things on friday. That way if your schedule frees up or if you have a change of heart, us two quitters can go together : )
E: (phone number)
(shes responding to my stuff pretty fast so I send an ice breaker on the phone so she gets my number like 15 minutes later)
Me: it was cool catching up - B
(no response to this)
I was a little nervous when I got into this text conversation (im always nervous at the beginning stages of anything with a girl if im completely initiating) and I could have done a little bit better. Some of my longer massages look SO much longer that hers in the chat bar (worse than it looks on here) and it could have came off a bit overwhelming. Also I could have tried to tease a bit tease investment from her and get a vibe going instead of trying to mechanically force things immediately. I don't know. At least I lead the interaction and tried to move fast and not beat around the bush. I wasn't expecting too much from it though.
I meet up with BG and her friend at this bar for a while and then we head out to go get stuff set up at their place. We are on the way to their house and BG and her friend were asking if I want to invite anyone for later. I casually told them I invited E and they were really surprised by this. They told me how after I left that she didn't get along with everyone there and they fired her for being on her phone too much. I see now why she just kind of ignored the “what decided you to make the change?” question. BG's friend and E had some pretty serious drama. Once we get to the house, it is pretty far from any public trans and is in kind of a Ghetto area (not too bad though). I decide just not to contact E or give her details on the party.
I wrote up what happened at the party, but it was like 5 pages in word single spaced, so i decided to cut it out and get to the important stuff. All that happened was I had a girl who i was doing well with but wasn't that attracted to and would have tanked my reputation in the social circle if i laid her. I politely and kindly missed a lot of windows she threw at me. Also there was this hot latina i was talking to most of the night, but she had a really possesive and confrontational "hood" guy she was "talking to" so it was hard to make any progress. After the two of those girls left i just chilled with friends and got pretty drunk and high.
I don't normally get wild like this and abuse alcohol or drugs but I decided to drink more and have my first edible on top of all the weed I already smoked. I never get too stupid and belligerent when im super under the influence, but at this point im getting a little silly as I am extremely high and drunk at the same time. At the end of the night (like 4 something in the morning) im laying down on a blow up mattress in the living room, I am having a really awesome body high, and I get a message on the phone in my pocket. I look at it and is the asian girl “E” texting me. I chuckle a bit cause I really didn't expect this, especially this late. I know now that I am in the drivers seat and just have to play it cool. I really dont give a fuck about what I say to her at this point and im just pretty flat out and “whatever” with her. I have a lot of trouble hitting in the right fucking keys and typing coherent messages but I kept it together. Here is how it went down.
E: Hey how was the party
Me: good, im kinda messed up. How was the babysitting?
E: Haha someone's having fun ;p it was aight. Nothing too crazy
ME: wow you just got done babysitting at 4 am. What kinda family do you work for?
E: This single mom is kinda crazy she just got back all drunk lol
E: But I only live a couple blocks away from her so it's not too bad
Me: Oh well thats cool, money to chill nextdoor I guess right.
E: yep and I just sip on some wine when the kids go to bed haha
Me: Lol that sounds really chill. Ur a great nanny
E: (blank message)
I wait a little while
Me: What are you doin still up this late?
E: I actually just got home
Me: Wow thats crazy
E: What r u doing
me: Trying to stay conscious
me: what are you doing
E: watching modern family
Me: that sounds cool
E: It's the best show. Haha are you going back today?
Me: no im staying down for another day or two
(even though I really dont know what the fuck im doing)
E: whats ur plan for today
me: might meet up with some friend from college
me: You?
E: I have a friends bday party around 11pm but I was hoping to get to see u for a bit!
(nice)
Me: sounds good. When were you thinking?
E: We can do either late lunch or dinner. What do u think
Me: dinners cool
E: ok how about 6?
(a couple more messages working out the details but It was close to her apartment)
Me: K see ya then
E: Ok night!
Me: Night
Im pretty happy as I go to bed because I didn't expect to get this opportunity. Anyway I wake up the next day and I have seriously underestimated how much I drank the last night and the edible I had didn't really help either. I felt terrible like I had an aneurism in the right side of my brain. I threw up all the bile in my stomach 3 separate times the next day like I had food poisoning or something (I never get sick the night of, the morning after is rough though). Im making it a promise to myself to not let this happen again for a long time as it wont help me push myself in seduction at all. I spent most of the day just drinking as much water and laying down, still on the couch in BG's living room. E texts me and asks me to do 7pm now at another bar thats closer to her house (I could use the extra time to recover, and later and closer to her place is always better). I text her thats cool and im not in a rush. I take a shower and im able to fully recover by about 6 pm. Surprisingly I still look pretty good and no one would be able to tell I fucking wrecked myself the night before.
I grab a ride back downtown with BG and her boyfriend who's taking her out to a concert at the house of blues for her birthday. I part ways with them there and walk the rest of the way up to this bar which is a decently long way. I get there on time tho and take a little look around the bar and shes not there yet. So I give E a call. She picks up and I focus on being warm and relaxed right from the start. I tell her I just found the place and she tells me that shes almost there and that we should grab a spot at the bar. I say thats cool. She seems warm and comfortable on the phone and is receptive to the kind of flirty tone im using. I hang up and go grab a spot at the bar for the two of us and I start making some fun small talk with the girl tending the bar so that when E sees me, she gets a better image than me sitting waiting there awkwardly on my phone. After a little while I hear her greet me from behind. I casually turn around and smile. I give her a hug and a response to the first thing she says. I look at her and tell her that she looks great (focusing on trying out being really flirty and direct on this date). She smiles and says thank you. She sits down and asks me how the party went. I honestly tell her that I had a lot to drink and smoked a lot and had an edible for the first time and I got pretty wrecked (I leave out the part about me throwing up the next day and stuff). She asks me if I smoke weed a lot and I honestly tell her that its a very occasional thing for me. She tells me that she never smokes at all (this comes into play later) but likes to drink and stuff. I ask her how the babysitting went and use that as a topic to transition into deep diving. I ask her how she got into babysitting and if she likes kids and stuff (not too seriously like im screening for mother material or anything). This girl was very easy to open up and really got into everything I asked her (I hit most of chases 8 questions). I maintained the 80% her 20% me ratio pretty much exactly.
(Everything below up until the point does not happen in chronological order up until the pull. It all kind of interweaved so i separated it into different categories)
The only thing she really knows about me after the night is over is the basic stuff I tell girls. She knows where I go to school and what I study, and when she asks me about what MY goals are in life I tell her that I value different things than most people. I say that im not all about spending the next 40 years working an office job to amass wealth only so I can buy a better house or a better TV while in the meantime im getting old doing the same thing every day that I dont love. And then when im old and look back I only had one stable stage of my life that lasted 30 years. I would rather travel and live in different locations, become worldly, and have a lot of different stages in my life and grow as a person. And I know that this lifestyle would cause me to live hand to mouth sometimes and would rule out building a family, but its worth it to me. That when im old I look back I know I lived a very rich and full life and taken everything that this world has to offer instead of breaking my back building up a pile of financial wealth when im just going to grown old and die shortly anyway.
Obviously I dont explain it this in depth and look like a try hard. But this is the basic message I try to convey as a way to get her in a spontaneous, live life by the moment mood, while also disqualifying myself from boyfriend material. I made it a point to say during the babysitting thing that im not really a kids guy, its not that I dont like kids or anything. I just don't wanna cuddle them in my arms and treasure them. I just kinda see them as little people and that I dont really see myself being a father. Anyway during the time when I was explaining my view on life she was really smiling and responding positively to this. It seemed to bring her in a better mood and she totally understood my view on things.
About ten minutes in I commented on the clothes she was wearing. This girl had a great sense of style. She was wearing some very mature and professional looking stuff that also showed off her figure and was wearing some very minimal cool jewelry and bracelets. I said she looked very professional and she laughed and told me how to her this is causal wear for her or whatever. I told her she looked cute with a smile. A little bit later she told me how people think she is often older than she is and comes off more mature. I told her I noticed that before and I find that sexy. She laughed and surprisingly responded with a “Oh well... thank you!” while she looked away (Maybe a little too direct? Time to pull it back a bit). She does feed off of this a little later on and asks me “why I decided to get in contact with her” (in a good way though) I responded with “I just felt like it” I told her as she can probably see im a little up front and bold with people. She responds to this positively and goes on to ask me. . “Do you ever just go up to girls and tell them their cute and talk to them” (basically asking me if I do cold approach... interesting). I tell her “Yea, if im in a spontaneous mood and the girl is cute”. I go on to playfully ask her if she ever seduces guys. She says that yea, that she is pretty bold too sometimes with guys and her friends wonder how she can do stuff like that. I say something positive about this.
During this time I was really trying to turn her on and get a spark going with my non-verbals and body language. During the serious deep diving points I connected with her and cooled it a bit. But during the other positive conversation I just stared at her in the left eye and imagined taking off her clothes in my mind and us having sex together (I could multitask and still hold the conversation well enough). My breathing was a little bit faster and a looked down at her lips while she was talking to me a lot. It seemed like she caught my eye and could tell what was going on in my head, but she never responded with the same kind of lustful focus. She didn't seem rejective towards it or give me any shit tests like “why are you looking at me like that” I also had my body turned towards hers and she was turned a bit towards me, and both of our legs were touching each other. When I would make points or be playful with her I would nudge her a little with my leg. I didn't do so much leaning over and touching her with my hands. Besides hugging her I didn't touch her with my hands much at all (should have just done it). She was staying positive though and asked me if I was single and I told her yes. She also at one point went on about herself and how she is now a promo girl for this whiskey company and gets paid 40 dollars an hour to stand around and be friendly. I try to just be chill about it and say “yea, thats pretty good money”. She goes on to tell me how they hired her because she is an asian girl but she does not exactly have an asian body (shes basically trying to tell me to my face that shes so sexy, so thats good I guess). She's right, this little girl has a fucking killer body on her that I want to ravage so badly. She constantly runs and works out, mainly to get away from some emotional pain ill describe below. She goes on to tell me hows she has been groped by creepy guys and shit while shes doing this job and I stay pretty unresponsive to that.
On the deep diving. Like I mentioned before I got this girl to completely open up very easily. She told me about how she was born in Korea and she was sent over here at a really young age. Technically she is an orphan but her family over in Korea still pays for everything for her from over there. The thing is that they barely talk and she can only see her parents once in a long time (last time was like 3 years ago). She tells me that the parents pay for so much of her stuff and spend so much money on her that she doesn't understand why they didn't want to keep her in their life (this is true, this girl lives in the nicest most expensive area of Chicago and has her own apartment by the lake. From living downtown myself, I can tell you that the price of that would be pretty lucrative, especially for a girl her age. I really wanted to join her back at her place to check it out and do other fun activities). She gets pretty emotional about this and goes on to ask me if I ever struggle with depression. I tell her I did a bit when I was younger but shifted it back on her and asked her why shes depressed (chemical, or thought pattern). She tells me its because she gets so lonely. I think that its good the way she is opening up to me but she is getting sad so I make a joke or change the subject to something else (flirty or fun) every now and then but delve back into this soon after.
She goes on talking about her family in Korea and her white family that adopted her in Virginia a bit more. I try not to play therapist to much and be like “it's okay baby ill make you feel better. Instead I try to stay just curious about it and listen to her and not get emotional about it. I tell her that "thats too bad" and that I find her story really fascinating. Here im thinking im making headway and bonding in a way that not a lot of other people do with her. But when I tell her that her story is very interesting she responds with “Yea, so many people say that”. I guess depressed people spill their shit on anyone who will take the time to listen to you to try and ease their pain (I used to be like this when I was depressed). I ask her what makes her the most happy in life. She says she likes to help people and told me this story about how she pushed this lady in a wheel chair around a super market and and some other stuff like that. I ask her if she ever thought of making a living out of this and doing something like being the head of hospitality at a hospital or doing work over in other struggling countries, or charity and stuff like that. She tells me maybe later on in life, but right now shes to busy being young and having fun. She goes on to tell me that everyone in both of her families are super christian and she kind of believes it, but it is something she will rely on later on in life. She says how all of her friends and family think she is such a good girl (I like where this is headed). I playfully ask her “why... are you, not a “good girl” with a sexy smile. She tells me she likes to drink and have fun and party but doesn't hint at anything sexual. This is how most of the deep diving went with some moments in between where she brought up other topics about movies and how she loves comedies and that “nacho libre” is her favorite movie. She brings up other shit like disney movies and I ask her whats her favorite 90s disney movie. I said “little mermaid” cause human ariel has a bangin body. She said “cinderella” or some really weak shit like that. I know this isn't super smooth stuff buts its how I keep conversation going while I try to find another good conversation thread.
At one point she asked me if I told BG who was hanging out yesterday about her and how we are hanging out. I thought this would be a great time to show her I was low key. So I responded by telling her honestly that no, I didn't tell anyone about what I was meeting up with her. I thought this was good because they told me how E got fired and that they all hate her so much. Im surprised when she goes on and doesn't respond well to this. She tells me she doesn't like it with guys in her life don't give details about anything and are very vague about stuff. She tells me how I sound like a “typical guy” I act like she is going off the handle a bit weird and tell her that I don't try to keep secrets from anyone, I just keep most of my life to myself and the people I share experiences with and don't advertise everything to everyone. Maybe this was a competition thing and she wanted BG who she had drama with to know I was hanging with her, I dont know. Then she goes on to tell me how people walk away from her in life (mainly guys). I talk about how I don't understand how some guys are like that and whatever (maybe I was a bit direct and looked like I was qualifying to her).
Anyway all this stuff above happened together at the same time and was kind of wove in together. Its not chronological, I just separated it out into different categories so im not jumping around all over the place. Everything after this is chronological.
So we have both been there for a while and have finished most of our food. The mood is positive at this point. I look at my phone and mention how I have an hour or two until I have to make my train back home. And I decide to run a yes ladder for the first time. So I ask her
Me: So are you having a good time hangin out right now?
Shes says yes with a smile
ME: do you like cinematic adventures (movies)?
shes says yes and is still smiling
ME: how bout we chill and watch a movie together until I have to go leave for my train.
Her face kinda changes and she asks me where we are going to do this
Me: Well do you have a tv at your place. (I try to be very casual and not make this a big deal at all)
shes like oh my place is really messy and im really self conscious about it. I tell her that im not a clean freak myself and im not goin to judge her for it. Its no big deal. She struggles a bit after this and then says that she just doesn't have people over this soon. But then she say that maybe we could do her place next time (ok, not bad... but i live an hour and a half away and i come down here only every so often). I say “so when you say "no"... you really mean “Yes” right?” I say this in a very playful way with a smile. She just smiles and says “...No!” with a little bit of a smart ass tone. Here I just chuckle and try to act like this doesn't affect me at all but I have to work on this a bit more (I think I broke eye contact down and to the right). So I try to just change to a frame where I thinks its kinda weird that shes too afraid to hang out and watch a movie with me for like an hour. I tell her I don't see what the big deal is but if shes really uncomfortable with that then we can go to Starbucks (which she suggested). I figured we could just go there and I would try to make her more comfortable and bring her back to her place. But heres where things start to go poorly.
I can't remember for some reason if this happened before or after the pull. I think the first half happened while she was talking about guys walking away from her. Then went back onto it after the failed pull. It might have all happened after the failed pull, but here is what happened.
She tells me she has a question for me. Im like “sure okay”. She then goes on to spill to me about this older guy she is “talking to” right now and how he said he wasn't ready for something serious right now because he just dumped his old girlfriend. But him and E have been seeing each other. She tells me how she made him wait for a while but now he has slept over with her like 4 or 5 times. Im like (oh fuck!... not this agaaaain) in my head. But I just try to act like my attention is drifting and I dont really care. The thing is she goes on and on and on about it. She asks me if hes going to commit and what is going on with him right now. I know playing mister advice giver is not the way into a girls pants. Eventually I just say “do you want me to be your life coach now” with a chuckle and a smile. I then say “I can't tell you what to do with your life, do what makes you happy”. She cools it a little and we are walking to starbucks and she brings up another guy “mike” from our old work. Mike is an amazing natural and I enjoy seeing him in action. She tells me now how mike came home with her one night and they smoked weed together (I thought she said that she doesn't take anyone home right away or smoke weed... this is what I find so interesting about naturals). Anyway she was telling me how he tried to fuck her while she was really drunk and she got so mad at him about it. Im assuming he probably did fuck her if she let him do the other stuff. And that she is mad because he got played. She seems to be bringing this up in a way like “you better not be trying to do this to me” I try to just look very uninterested while she is going on about this but she wont stop. So I just say in a surprised way “wow... you are very open about this stuff”. She then shuts down and tells me maybe she shouldn't have said that stuff. I tell her that I don't judge her for it.
This is a problem I get pretty often, and the pattern goes like this. Cute girl likes me and shows me a ton of attraction signs and asks ME out most of the time. We go on the date and I run things similar like you read above just deep diving, creating a spark, and trying to do a casual pull at the end of the night. The whole time they are responding well and things are going decently well, but after I try to pull or at a transition point, or even before the pull out of nowhere sometimes, they tell me how they are “talking to” or basically fucking this 30 something year old restaurant owner, night club staff guy, lawyer, business man, or just how they are dealing with some really good, older natural who is fucking them right now. This has gotten pretty annoying the more ive encountered it. I can't exactly fuck girls a decade younger than me because then I would be fucking 11 year olds and I would go to jail. Hell at my age I couldn't even do high school girls without looking like a creep or getting thrown in jail. I guess I welcome it as a challenge and I have to turn myself into fucking top tier lover material. I just don't understand where its coming from as they show all kinds of interest and ask ME out usually, especially when the date seems to be going fairly well (im no master yet but i feel i do well and devour all the information on this site and utilize it).
Anyway we get to Starbucks and the sexual mood is killed. I see now that it is brighter in here that she is wearing a fucking see through shirt and I definitely would have called her out on putting that on for me earlier in the night... but now, not so much. She goes to the bathroom, gets her tea and sits down with me. Now im just chilling and she is carrying the converstion. But she is showing me pictures of her white Virginia siblings on the phone talking about her gay bff's and how the boys behind me have cute hair. Im just chilling trying to look unaffected. After a while she says how shes going to take a nap before she goes out for her friends bday at the club later that night. I say something about how I have the best dreams when I nap. She goes on and talks about a recurring dream she has where her korean mother leaves her alone on a bus and that she thinks its because of the way her family life is going. She gets really into this and almost starts crying, I decide to lighten the mood a bit by telling her about the only recurring dream I had when I was younger where I get attacked by a vampire in a blockbuster video store (thought this would fit in with her nacho libre humor). Her face lights up and she has a really good laugh at this and it puts her in much happier mood. The conversation goes a bit better for the rest of the time but its still pretty platonic. I tell her that that its about time for me to go and we both head out and I hug her good bye. She seems like she is expecting me to walk with her for a bit but I tell her im going the other way to grab a cab. Im afraid hanging around with her and doing shit with her right now will just further place me in the friends zone.
Anyway I was upset with how things turned out at the end and things definitely didn't end on a good note. I wanted to text her to get some positve vibes going to give her a better last impression to think of. I knew that I couldnt say anything sexual in this case, and saying some shit about how I had I good time would be weak. So I sent something I thought would remind her of a time where she really laughed and had fun, and remind her about how much she opened up to me. I sent this to her almost an hour later
Me: I can't believe I opened up and told you about my blockbuster vampire dream. I feel so vulnerable right now haha
Her: Haha no worries. I had fun!
(think the sarcasm might have went over her head a bit)
Me: Good : )
(some girls used this one me and I felt it provided positive vibes without being too needy. But now I look back it might be positive reinforcement for her being platonic. I dont know)
if you saw from my last FR++, I really want to get more experience tackling hard LMR. But unfortunately I didn't get to do that this time. This girl was pretty sexy and I wanted to bang too.
Things I learned and could have done different/ what you guys can teach me on
1. First thing I have to do is when a girl brings up other guys I have to try and just obliterate it immediately. From now on when is see this stuff im going to immediately put on a big smile and chuckle as I say “Did you ask me out just so you could get my relationship advice?” or something like that. Ill experiment with my words. What would be good to do here guys?
2. I really over estimate my value and get too confident when hot girls show me great signs. I think I can just play it cool and just easily sweep them off their feet. These girls get hit on a whole lot and you really have to stand out from the pack of guys who are attracted to them (all guys) because high value girls are really selective about their mates. Usually all girls want to date up and I have to set myself a little above them and bit a bit more challenging. This girl was fucking all over me at work, but once i told her how sexy she was at the date and gave her obvious signs, she didnt invest in me as much. I should have done more teasing and trying to get her to chase. If I could go back I would tell her (without it being to harsh) that BG told me she got fired from the job and that she had a lot of drama with most of the people there. This would immediately put me in a superior position and she would have to explain to me why she is not a lazy worker who got fired, and why she is not a bad person who most people hate. This would have also made it harder for her to challenge me and say no to me if I maintained this frame.
3. Lastly this girl obviously is going through a lot of emotional hardship and depression, and she is really emotionally needy. Because of this shes not down for 1 night stands and is always looking for guys to commit and she gets really bitter and upset when they don't. She seemed really sensitive and was really fast to bring up her guard at the end. From now on, if the girl is not very sexually liberated or down for a hook up, im really going to try to fly under the radar and combine that with step 2. hopefully if I get them chasing and investing in me, and my fundamentals are good and im only doing the lightest teasing but more focusing on having a fun time... hopefully when I try to pull or move things to a seduction location, they will be down because they are investing in ME, and they don't think im going to try and fuck them. Then once I get there alone, I build sexual tension, kiss them, and just try to chip away to see if I can lay them. Then if its going well but they aren't ready for sex, ill try to do it on another day when they will be a bit more comfortable. At least this way I got out of the platonic friend zone the first time, and I don't fail going for sex early and fuck everything up.
What do you guys think? Should I try to hit up this girl again the next time im downtown and try to apply this stuff?
I know that I was very long and descriptive, but hopefully you can see really clearly how I run things and how things went. Any of you guys see any things that I can work on or do better? How can I tighten up my game and where do you guys think some of these struggles come from?
And do you agree with the lessons I learned and how i'm adapting?
