Flames said:
Right read that post and boiling it down your saying I should trust my instincts, but I need to be looking more towards results rather than reactions.
Makes somewhat sense, my instincts are saying she's into me, but I'm wasting a lot of time I could be spending, with easier girls.
Which still isn't helping me
I've worked with a few women like that back when I was in the corporate world.
One was this beautiful 40 year old secretary for the big boss who really knew how to work her sexual powers. Tight body, gorgeous face, and a voice that absolutely purred. She'd always wear these tight, slinky dresses that showed off a lot of skin in an otherwise conservative office environment, and she'd make you feel like she was totally focused on you and interested whenever you talked to her. Laughed at your jokes, touched you a fair amount, but it was never too much, it was always...
almost sincere. She was adept at avoiding men's attempts to pin her down though - even I tried, and I never went for women that much older than me (I was 25 or 26 at the time) - but she was such a sexy minx I had to give it a shot.
Eventually I realized that was just her way with men, and it was how she got what she wanted at work. She was great at taking things
just to the brink with the men around her, finding ways to get relatively one-on-one with them when she did it (dropping by to pass along a note, etc.) and not doing it in front of others, so it always felt special. But she never let herself get trapped by the chasing and desire she inspired in men. She played the men around her like fiddles... she was good.
Well, you could plow time into her, but the better way is to simply air it out and be forthright about it.
Think about it: if she DOES dig you, and you say, "I want us to grab some food or a drink next week - when's good?"
If she really digs you...
Like, HONESTLY...
Is she going to keep evading? Why?
Of course not. Women who like you don't get uncomfortable when you ask them out... they get EXCITED!
That's all you've got to do. Pin her down. Try and get her out. If she's excited and says yes - there's your answer; she digs you, and it was what she was hoping for. If she's uncomfortable and makes up excuses and slip-slides her way out of it -
there's your answer; she liked you right where you were, as an admirer and a flirting buddy, and she's not thrilled you've decided you want to push to be more than that and not content yourself to hang there in awkward "does she or doesn't she?" land until one of you retires.
Pin her down and ask her out. Move things forward with her. If she assents, she likes you as a romantic or sexual partner. If she evades, she likes you... being in her orbit.
Also, bear in mind, women don't necessarily want EVERY man in their orbits. I've had girlfriends who really only flirted with a couple of guys at work, because they found these guys the most handsome / charming / intelligent, and they enjoyed being pursued by men like that. When those guys would start pushing for dates though, these girls would get pretty upset, because the guy didn't seem to know his place. I tried explaining that of COURSE the guy is going to think he can get something when you're flirting with him; they'll just say 1) why can't we just be friends? then later 2) I like that these guys are chasing after me and trying to get me!
Women know what they're doing. They get the highest quality guys they can get to chase them, then keep those guys in orbit.
If you had your pick, who would you rather have chasing after you - fat girls or supermodels? Yeah, sure... the supermodels. Even if you were totally monogamous with your girl, or you don't really dig girls without educations, for instance... it still feels better to have hotties chasing you down than it does the alternative.
Chicks do the same thing. There's the hottie they date, and the hotties they have in orbit.
Ask her out, and you'll know right away which one she sees you as.
Chase
