Waste of time? Not sure.

[BigBigBigdaddy]

There is this girl that I have been seeing for the past week and everything seems to be going fine. We have met up 2 times and we have really good conversations. For instance, we can talk about a lot of different stuff and really dive into it. I feel like I know a shit ton about her and she knows a shitton about me. However, I am not able to cross the kissing boundary with her. Like originally during the first date, before she knew too much about me, I tried to invite her to my place but she said "I dont know you well enough" Which I took as I haven't built up enough either sexual/comfort for that to happen. During this time she did mention that she had some type of attack on herself that got pretty bad (like there was a police record apparently and though she didn't say it i'm assuming, reading between the lines, there was some type of sexual assault going on) that happened a year ago.

When the second date happened I tried to get a little more physical and try to escalate things so that it would lead to a kiss. She lets me get away with fairly neutral stuff like shoulders and arm but when I try and be a little risky like putting my arm around her waist she stops me by saying that she doesn't want to do that because "of her assault". Were out in public and I dont know if I should be trying to deep dive into something like that so soon so I ignore it and think "OK she doesn't like to be touched at all so maybe I should try and escalate again but in private." I again invite her to my place pretty causally with some water and snacks (plausible deniability) and she again said "were not close enough". We do hang for more time I even did experiment with some sex talk was able for her to talk about herself in her underwear but again the 2nd date ends with no escalation and no kiss. Keep in mind these dates were like 6 hours per session they were not quick. So at this point im starting to think she is a waste of time.

My reasoning: Its already the second date. Usually if you haven't made it to the second date with at least a kiss you get slotted into boyfriend/male friend area. I didn't set the best of frames with letting her set rules about "how much she hast to see a guy before going back to there place" that I dont really think will change without playing her game of slow seduction. Which I don't know will be the right moment for her and with the rule that attraction expires it feels like I have at max 1-2 more times before not even a boyfriend is a possibility (heck towards the end of the second date it felt like we were both getting less attracted to each other). But I'm not sure how to make that happen because of the whole assault. She seems to be really affected by it and doesn't seem ready for that type of intimacy at least if I was to meet up with her another 1-2 times. So It kinda feels like a situation that maybe is a little too advanced for me to handle at this point in my seduction career. I should probably drop her and move on.

So I wanted to hear to opinions from the seduction community before I make my decision. See if my reasoning is solid or if I am being a little pussy ass bitch, rationalizing too much and just need to do "X". Should I try and break this girls walls with some type of slow seduction or just drop her entirely.

 

[Militarybrat]

She has trust issues with men after her experience. Being alone with a man is going to be difficult for her unless she trusts him completely. The kind of trust she needs is developed over a long period of time. If you want a notch on your buckle I suggest you move on. That said if you are looking for more than that keep seeing her and build that trust while you shag other women. Trying to push through her defenses will get you a ghost.

Brat

 

[Skjöldr]

6 hours x 2 ????????
Bro you're a full time attention giver. You spent as much time on this girl as i spend on cold approaching and dating per week COMBINED. Listen man, in the beginning we tend to way over invest in one girl, the cure is to meet more women. Vaginas don't get wet from crossing boxes off their written checklist, women respond to emotions. She makes these rules to maximize free attention and not letting too many guys off the hook, but when she's around Chad McAlpha, she throws the rulebook into the bin. As @Skills said the other day, your goal is dick in pussy. You have been together for 12 hours now, you have plenty of rapport and comfort to invite her home without that being an issue, so simply disappear from her life, no more investing in her, and if she reaches out to you, invite her to your place for the 3rd date, if she declines, next, if she accepts and she turns down your advances on the meet, next her. Good luck. No more investing in her, you are chasing too hard, time to give her some space to reciprocate.

 

[Skjöldr]

She has trust issues with men after her experience. Being alone with a man is going to be difficult for her unless she trusts him completely. The kind of trust she needs is developed over a long period of time. If you want a notch on your buckle I suggest you move on. That said if you are looking for more than that keep seeing her and build that trust while you shag other women. Trying to push through her defenses will get you a ghost.

Brat

Just realized she had those trust issues aight. This isn't a bad idea. If you want you can try more with this girl, but on one condition: She's not the only girl you're seeing. Personally i have a 2-3 strikes and you're out rule. If she's a 7/10 and down, she has 2 dates to put out, if she's 8/10 and up i will give her a 3rd date chance depending on whether i have time or not.