- Joined
- Dec 8, 2017
- Messages
- 289
I got two ig contacts.
My instincts are telling me to go into collection mode. But I should really be trying to bang tonight.
I'm thinking, collect a bunch of ig's before I go to rehab. That's stupid.
OK, so I went out for a walk. I'm unemployed, I quit my job basically for lack of social skills. It's almost like I do have social skills and I'm just a selfish asshole. I mean, at this point, I know, I Am The Asshole.
Well, I did it while I was high so there's that but I am framing it as quitting my job to become a famous artist. Uh-really I just have to get some art done before I go for a better job. That is, if I can pull it together. I suppose I could go to rehab.
So i walk just to walk. My grandfather says something like i felt like he was hinting to go walk past my highschool crushes house, but looking at the ground.
OK so I go out. And I'm like, oh no, I havent asked out a single girl. I was like, lemme walk to High School crush house. OK, when I got to the edge of the neighborhood, I was like, nah, lemme walk up here towardss the park.
I'm like lemme get some gatorade from CVS. Walked into CVS like, I'm not looking down the aisles for girls. Just went straight for the gatorade. Nodded at the guy who works there, he knows me, he knows my dad well, but I do not like him that much, but I'm trying to be cool... Then paying, the other guy who works there, who has also become frosty for some reason?! Its my fault. He goes, to the lady, customer, something about oh hes not taking time off hes here every day. Maybe Im being paranoid but it felt like a cutting remark about me. Left sighing, thinking if I'd been on the hunt I wouldn't have these little petty annoyances. This is what happens when you don't approach.
I went down and was eavesdropping on people. Looked at the cost of tennis membership. Then I was coming back up and I saw a dude with a super hot chick. I glanced at him and then checked out the girl. She made strong sultry eycontact with me. "tennis" "Basketball" I heard them say as she maintained eye contact. I walked over towards crush's house direction, but then thought, why don't I get high right before going to creep around my crush's house. Genius. Well, it was fine I'm sure, but being high made it nerve racking. Oh, but before I went I sat and smoke my new vape and watched the good looking couple walk back out of the park, now holding hands. I felt like stealing her but I didn't make any moves. Didn't want to feel unabundant.
That was a point where I was like oh, god, I'm not doing any approaches! And I'm just like chill. Walked around the park realizing it was a terrible place to chill. ended up walking out another way and then ending up right where I wanted to be to make a smooth beeline to my crushe's house. So i walked in an L past her house, studying the ground the whole time. But then, right in front of her house, I saw a woman walking up. I glanced. Then as she walked by I glanced again. She was looking away, looking at a house. Could it have been her mom? No I remember her mom now from prom. Anyway, that got my heart pounding.
So I loop back around to where I could go to the same college as yesterday or go back into the center. I want to go take my shoes off by the lake, and I don't want to spam approach the college. So head head back thru the center to go to the lake. On the way I see a cute girl taking selfies at a picnic table. I sit down at a nearby picnic table and fiddle with my vape while checking her out. She looks super young but I walk by and get a closer look and she's pretty cute. I do my question opener.
She is receptive and I sit down across from her, not pulling my feet into the center of the picnic table. (I felt awkard pulling my leg up last time, but that time thte girl was on the same side)
We proceed to have a little conversation. Oh yeah, I was like, well, not right here right now, I forgot my sketchbook, like, I could go buy a sketchbook, I go go get my paints... Oh I was like, do you have a piece of paper? And she looked in her purse. I was like what are you doing here. She's like I just had a hair appointment. I went back to my bob. I was stumbling thte train of thought, going oh, blah blah, oh you used to have long hair? Oh, youre in school? what are you in high school? No she's a senior at the local college. And she asks me if I live around here. I say yeah, I live with my parents.
Oh yeah at the beginning i did put some oressure on her like oh we could go to your place or something and I sared at her eyes while she thought about it. In a way what I said was innocent but I was trying to intentionally put the vibe out. don't recall. I looked away. I shouldve been more aggressive and dominant.
At one point I just threw out, wanna walk to the lake with me, and then she was like I gotta go meet my roomates. Damn that was my chance for the multiple girls. OK so I was like lemme leave this. I was like saying somethingf, and then interrupted myelf, oh i guess I could give you my instagram. Then she eagerly gave me her phone to let me type it in. Like she was getting off on that. We didnt touch in any way. She followed me. Then I tried to keep it going with small talk. At some point I pause and then said oh youre a senior, so wanna get a drink later? I was like I might go this place later. (I don't think I'm gonna go, I'm pretty tired) She was like yeah, but I was like maybe... so hows that. I should force myself to go. HMMM. I should DM her to meet me at the bar tomorrow. I'll dm later. IDK man. I need to rest and take a shower.Its too late today. she got up and left and she said see you later and I was like ok.
HOneslty tired and being at home, I wanna lay low and get pussy while my parents are out during the day.
So I walk to the fucking lake and it's bad, I don;t approach.
I just relax with my shoes off.
I go back home, but then I do a couple detours, end up cutting through the train station and chat up 3 cute chicks, one of which was one I saw earlier. It fizzles out. Walk home and go out of my way to chase a fat ass girl walking in jogging gear, I jog past her and chat her up, get her to follow my instagram and then cut through a shortcut and jog home.
Not bad. I follow requested her but haven't DM'd.
I should push myself to get pussy. We'll see. shower and chill now.
My instincts are telling me to go into collection mode. But I should really be trying to bang tonight.
I'm thinking, collect a bunch of ig's before I go to rehab. That's stupid.
OK, so I went out for a walk. I'm unemployed, I quit my job basically for lack of social skills. It's almost like I do have social skills and I'm just a selfish asshole. I mean, at this point, I know, I Am The Asshole.
Well, I did it while I was high so there's that but I am framing it as quitting my job to become a famous artist. Uh-really I just have to get some art done before I go for a better job. That is, if I can pull it together. I suppose I could go to rehab.
So i walk just to walk. My grandfather says something like i felt like he was hinting to go walk past my highschool crushes house, but looking at the ground.
OK so I go out. And I'm like, oh no, I havent asked out a single girl. I was like, lemme walk to High School crush house. OK, when I got to the edge of the neighborhood, I was like, nah, lemme walk up here towardss the park.
I'm like lemme get some gatorade from CVS. Walked into CVS like, I'm not looking down the aisles for girls. Just went straight for the gatorade. Nodded at the guy who works there, he knows me, he knows my dad well, but I do not like him that much, but I'm trying to be cool... Then paying, the other guy who works there, who has also become frosty for some reason?! Its my fault. He goes, to the lady, customer, something about oh hes not taking time off hes here every day. Maybe Im being paranoid but it felt like a cutting remark about me. Left sighing, thinking if I'd been on the hunt I wouldn't have these little petty annoyances. This is what happens when you don't approach.
I went down and was eavesdropping on people. Looked at the cost of tennis membership. Then I was coming back up and I saw a dude with a super hot chick. I glanced at him and then checked out the girl. She made strong sultry eycontact with me. "tennis" "Basketball" I heard them say as she maintained eye contact. I walked over towards crush's house direction, but then thought, why don't I get high right before going to creep around my crush's house. Genius. Well, it was fine I'm sure, but being high made it nerve racking. Oh, but before I went I sat and smoke my new vape and watched the good looking couple walk back out of the park, now holding hands. I felt like stealing her but I didn't make any moves. Didn't want to feel unabundant.
That was a point where I was like oh, god, I'm not doing any approaches! And I'm just like chill. Walked around the park realizing it was a terrible place to chill. ended up walking out another way and then ending up right where I wanted to be to make a smooth beeline to my crushe's house. So i walked in an L past her house, studying the ground the whole time. But then, right in front of her house, I saw a woman walking up. I glanced. Then as she walked by I glanced again. She was looking away, looking at a house. Could it have been her mom? No I remember her mom now from prom. Anyway, that got my heart pounding.
So I loop back around to where I could go to the same college as yesterday or go back into the center. I want to go take my shoes off by the lake, and I don't want to spam approach the college. So head head back thru the center to go to the lake. On the way I see a cute girl taking selfies at a picnic table. I sit down at a nearby picnic table and fiddle with my vape while checking her out. She looks super young but I walk by and get a closer look and she's pretty cute. I do my question opener.
She is receptive and I sit down across from her, not pulling my feet into the center of the picnic table. (I felt awkard pulling my leg up last time, but that time thte girl was on the same side)
We proceed to have a little conversation. Oh yeah, I was like, well, not right here right now, I forgot my sketchbook, like, I could go buy a sketchbook, I go go get my paints... Oh I was like, do you have a piece of paper? And she looked in her purse. I was like what are you doing here. She's like I just had a hair appointment. I went back to my bob. I was stumbling thte train of thought, going oh, blah blah, oh you used to have long hair? Oh, youre in school? what are you in high school? No she's a senior at the local college. And she asks me if I live around here. I say yeah, I live with my parents.
Oh yeah at the beginning i did put some oressure on her like oh we could go to your place or something and I sared at her eyes while she thought about it. In a way what I said was innocent but I was trying to intentionally put the vibe out. don't recall. I looked away. I shouldve been more aggressive and dominant.
At one point I just threw out, wanna walk to the lake with me, and then she was like I gotta go meet my roomates. Damn that was my chance for the multiple girls. OK so I was like lemme leave this. I was like saying somethingf, and then interrupted myelf, oh i guess I could give you my instagram. Then she eagerly gave me her phone to let me type it in. Like she was getting off on that. We didnt touch in any way. She followed me. Then I tried to keep it going with small talk. At some point I pause and then said oh youre a senior, so wanna get a drink later? I was like I might go this place later. (I don't think I'm gonna go, I'm pretty tired) She was like yeah, but I was like maybe... so hows that. I should force myself to go. HMMM. I should DM her to meet me at the bar tomorrow. I'll dm later. IDK man. I need to rest and take a shower.Its too late today. she got up and left and she said see you later and I was like ok.
HOneslty tired and being at home, I wanna lay low and get pussy while my parents are out during the day.
So I walk to the fucking lake and it's bad, I don;t approach.
I just relax with my shoes off.
I go back home, but then I do a couple detours, end up cutting through the train station and chat up 3 cute chicks, one of which was one I saw earlier. It fizzles out. Walk home and go out of my way to chase a fat ass girl walking in jogging gear, I jog past her and chat her up, get her to follow my instagram and then cut through a shortcut and jog home.
Not bad. I follow requested her but haven't DM'd.
I should push myself to get pussy. We'll see. shower and chill now.
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