Went to a bar with friends ended up putting no effort

[Starboy]

So last night I went to a bar with a couple friends of mine with the intention of approaching at least 5 girls,but I ended up not doing it. The first bar we originally wanted to go to was closed and that was a college bar. We went to this other bar as a backup and there was some women that I thought were attractive,but I never approached them because I psyched myself out by waiting too long. I told myself first I would eat my food,finish my drink,use the bathroom and then approach,but I never did it. There was this one woman who I especially was attracted to white,with a pink dress, big boobs and ass by herself in the corner,but I just never did it. I think my excuse was not knowing the right opener to use and how would I follow up and how would I transition to a conversation afterwards and a bunch of bullshit.She looked bored most of the night and was talking to this swole black dude and these two other white guys. Later on she looked like she was having a good time talking to these people and got hooked to the black dude.Eventually her and the black dude left the bar together which got me annoyed cuz I had so many chances to make a move,but didnt. Meanwhile as i'm trying to process what I want to do during the night my friends and this one girl that my friend invited kept asking me if i was good and why I wasn't ordering another drink. Eventually I asked for more drinks just so they would stop bothering me and after a while I thought there was no point on trying to talk to girls.I had no momentum,nothing to push me.I didnt approach because I didnt know how do you interrupt a girl thats talking with another guy or her girlfriend and I built that excuse up in my head to the point where I realize I ended up doing nothing.My friends distracted me too much and one of my friends was arguing with this girl he brought cuz he was being too aggressive with her and she didnt like it. I realize if I want to get better I have to do it the hard way and go to bars by myself without any distractions and actually approach girls. One of my friends discouraged me from doing this,but that's only cuz he's a loser who's terrible with women and pretty much only gets girls through luck and randomness. The other friend is a natural who has slept with over 100 women,but he's very manipulative and sometimes he brings me down by mentioning some girls and saying I don't have a chance with them. Overall I was pissed at myself and thinking about it on the train ride home and I hope that the next time I go out I will take action and put effort

 

[ElderPrice]

Meh, I wouldn't feel too bad about it. Sounds like basic approach anxiety. You said your goal for the night was to approach 5 girls. Well then, really the only reason you should be nervous is if you had a DIFFERENT goal in mind and just aren't being entirely honest with yourself. Next time, try a modification of the newbie assignment. Approach those girls (and guys too if it helps) with ZERO intention of pulling them, and instead just introduce yourself and make conversation. If you need to make a game of it, try making the rounds like a politician and say hi and introduce yourself to everyone in the bar. Do this to complete your stated goal, then the next time try going a step further. Again, basically the newbie assignment haha.

 

[Forger_38]

This. So much this. Don't set yourself "production" goals like you're at a factory shift. It only makes it harder. Go at the bar to have fun, see a great looking girl? Try to engage a discussion with her, it works, jackpot, it doesn't work, eh, nothing terrible, you didn't come here for that, just try to talk with your friends if you came with them or get yourself something good to drink (don't go for the cheap beer, try to go to a bar in which you'll find things that are actually pleasant to drink. Plus, hell, just ordering something uncommon or going to an unusual bar could be a chat opener!), and try again if you feel like it.

If you set yourself an objective and go only for that, you'll fail, because no plan survives the first 5 minutes of reality. Go in without a plan and see what happens.