- Joined
- Nov 24, 2012
- Messages
- 317
Haven't been back in a while but just had an experience where I wish I had! - I made two major mistakes in reading this girl and that put off my usual solid confidence in dealing with LMR and thus missed a chance that was pretty much a done deal otherwise. What was the major mistake here and what can I do to reverse it?
SKIP TO SECOND MISTAKE FOR IMPORTANT PART
Met a girl on tinder, shes a yes+ very pretty, totally natural perfect strawberry blonde, nice skirt, and she's even brought some sexy heels along for later as I suggested. She driven and is earning very good money in a top job for her age (24).
She's quite late and has been generally quite disorganised in the lead up to the meet - Maybe partly because she is unsure about meeting someone from tinder (I'm her first). In the first nice bar I take her we connect well, shes quickly comfortable with hand touch and my arm around the back of the bench we are sitting on. Things are smooth - she's playing the game chasing very nicely, trying to not act like a fool - she is quite inexperienced clearly.... this is a walk in the park so far!
FIRST MISTAKE:
I tell her its fine shes late as she can buy the first drink (I like to see girls invest first - then generally I pay everything after that), she appears to playfully go along with that when I say it. BUT when we go to leave and I say "so you're getting this" theres a SUDDEN big change - she says really? Body language changes. She hesitates. Then seeing I did mean it - pays.... She says she almost walked off right then, she's never had to pay before and if a guy brings you somewhere its fair he pays.... - cue cold body language - not letting me hold her anymore to guide her etc - keeps space between us... generally her playfulness and chasing stops... I should have read her better and realised she would react this way - also she didn't seem to realise I was going to pay everything else - hadn't thought to mention it though I had implied it.
She warms up quite quickly int eh next bar, we sit in candlelight she really likes it - we get close again - shes more talkative now and playing again... we go and lie down outside shes totally fine about the drink now I kiss her gently and pull back.
SECOND MISTAKE:
As with all my other dates I suggest we go for pool - we have to get a train there and it happens to be where I live - usually this is sufficient to imply we are going to my place since I mention I have the table for it. She is initially resistant to getting on the train out of town (mainly because I for the first time also wasn't conviced she was down and it was a good idea).Well I plough on... we get in a taxi at the other end to go for pool
As we get to my place she realises its not a pool bar but my place and starts to get very upset - I say thats no problem lets go back, tell the taxi to turn around - damage is already done she FLIPS THE FUCK OUT (this is the first time i've had this reaction to exactly the same date on plenty of occasions - the only important variable i can see here is shes older than the average girl I date and she has a serious job). She orders a taxi to go home tell s me to leave her alone that I've ruined her night and deceived her leaving her in the middle of nowhere...
Against crazy odds i get her to take a bus back to the centre with me it was TOUGH....I try and explain I didnt mean to deceive her - but its a loosing battle initially her: "thats such a student thing to do - I'm not a student" - I feel bad and try to be nice - maybe OVERDO it- i tell her that I would be upset for months if I thought I'd ruined someones night - (its never happened to me and I pride myself on 100% happy dates so it would !)
I actually go over board and when she says actually she's enjoyed herself I say it almost makes me cry hearing her say that (Ok maybe I need to drink more when not on dates lol). Anyway all the bars are closed so she orders a cab to her place - surprised - I dont even ask. She pours me a drink we watch a film in her living room (she shares) I escalate very gently -, i get her simulating sex on top of me with her skirt hiked up - she gets super turned on, I flip her over and spank her she loves it, finger her through her thong get her to beg for me inside her and she does tells me "I desperately want you inside me but I'm a good girl, no matter how much I want to I wont" she tells me repeatedly she needs to go to sleep, I suggest I join her she says she wont be able to sleep with someone else there - basically NO - I could have probalbly broken this but after the earlier mistakes I decide to not seem desperate and leave without a fight (3rd mistake - I know what to do here!).. we walk out to wait for the taxi I finger her while we are waiting outside and put the fingers in her mouth as it arrives - she LOVES it make her tell me she wants it again but leave...
We text, also next day she sends me a breakfast pic. She says she's been signed up to a marathon I say:
I'll be super proud of you if you make it! Didn't realise you'd try to get so fit for me so quickly!
this was after she'd just asked why exercise was so important to me. - SHE HASNT REPLIED since i sent it SAT - I tried calling a few days later (we had called previously quite frequently) no pickup.... Ive left it since. Was I too cheeky? I'm guessing its something bigger - maybe she feels she can't date a "student" (even if I'm a grad student with a job that was out of school before returning)?
SKIP TO SECOND MISTAKE FOR IMPORTANT PART
Met a girl on tinder, shes a yes+ very pretty, totally natural perfect strawberry blonde, nice skirt, and she's even brought some sexy heels along for later as I suggested. She driven and is earning very good money in a top job for her age (24).
She's quite late and has been generally quite disorganised in the lead up to the meet - Maybe partly because she is unsure about meeting someone from tinder (I'm her first). In the first nice bar I take her we connect well, shes quickly comfortable with hand touch and my arm around the back of the bench we are sitting on. Things are smooth - she's playing the game chasing very nicely, trying to not act like a fool - she is quite inexperienced clearly.... this is a walk in the park so far!
FIRST MISTAKE:
I tell her its fine shes late as she can buy the first drink (I like to see girls invest first - then generally I pay everything after that), she appears to playfully go along with that when I say it. BUT when we go to leave and I say "so you're getting this" theres a SUDDEN big change - she says really? Body language changes. She hesitates. Then seeing I did mean it - pays.... She says she almost walked off right then, she's never had to pay before and if a guy brings you somewhere its fair he pays.... - cue cold body language - not letting me hold her anymore to guide her etc - keeps space between us... generally her playfulness and chasing stops... I should have read her better and realised she would react this way - also she didn't seem to realise I was going to pay everything else - hadn't thought to mention it though I had implied it.
She warms up quite quickly int eh next bar, we sit in candlelight she really likes it - we get close again - shes more talkative now and playing again... we go and lie down outside shes totally fine about the drink now I kiss her gently and pull back.
SECOND MISTAKE:
As with all my other dates I suggest we go for pool - we have to get a train there and it happens to be where I live - usually this is sufficient to imply we are going to my place since I mention I have the table for it. She is initially resistant to getting on the train out of town (mainly because I for the first time also wasn't conviced she was down and it was a good idea).Well I plough on... we get in a taxi at the other end to go for pool
As we get to my place she realises its not a pool bar but my place and starts to get very upset - I say thats no problem lets go back, tell the taxi to turn around - damage is already done she FLIPS THE FUCK OUT (this is the first time i've had this reaction to exactly the same date on plenty of occasions - the only important variable i can see here is shes older than the average girl I date and she has a serious job). She orders a taxi to go home tell s me to leave her alone that I've ruined her night and deceived her leaving her in the middle of nowhere...
Against crazy odds i get her to take a bus back to the centre with me it was TOUGH....I try and explain I didnt mean to deceive her - but its a loosing battle initially her: "thats such a student thing to do - I'm not a student" - I feel bad and try to be nice - maybe OVERDO it- i tell her that I would be upset for months if I thought I'd ruined someones night - (its never happened to me and I pride myself on 100% happy dates so it would !)
I actually go over board and when she says actually she's enjoyed herself I say it almost makes me cry hearing her say that (Ok maybe I need to drink more when not on dates lol). Anyway all the bars are closed so she orders a cab to her place - surprised - I dont even ask. She pours me a drink we watch a film in her living room (she shares) I escalate very gently -, i get her simulating sex on top of me with her skirt hiked up - she gets super turned on, I flip her over and spank her she loves it, finger her through her thong get her to beg for me inside her and she does tells me "I desperately want you inside me but I'm a good girl, no matter how much I want to I wont" she tells me repeatedly she needs to go to sleep, I suggest I join her she says she wont be able to sleep with someone else there - basically NO - I could have probalbly broken this but after the earlier mistakes I decide to not seem desperate and leave without a fight (3rd mistake - I know what to do here!).. we walk out to wait for the taxi I finger her while we are waiting outside and put the fingers in her mouth as it arrives - she LOVES it make her tell me she wants it again but leave...
We text, also next day she sends me a breakfast pic. She says she's been signed up to a marathon I say:
I'll be super proud of you if you make it! Didn't realise you'd try to get so fit for me so quickly!
this was after she'd just asked why exercise was so important to me. - SHE HASNT REPLIED since i sent it SAT - I tried calling a few days later (we had called previously quite frequently) no pickup.... Ive left it since. Was I too cheeky? I'm guessing its something bigger - maybe she feels she can't date a "student" (even if I'm a grad student with a job that was out of school before returning)?