FR What to do with number?

[Dern]

*A post taken from my journal...

August 9

Today was an interesting day...

I went downtown today and did around 10 approaches. Pretty much got rejected on all of them right after the opener.

1. Felt that my vibe was way off today (was tired from hockey last night and tired from sleeping too late)

2. Need to work on light bantering / flirting / teasing right after the opener before I proceed to deep dive and ask her to stop walking

3. Need to work on fundamentals like: voice, fashion, facial hair, and hair (today I went downtown with a white t-shirt, the sleeves almost reached my elbow, meaning it was a bit too big for me, and I was wearing black and grey plaid shorts that reached my kneecap along with grey and blue nikes.

So, I was walking home pretty disappointed, once again. I mean, to be honest, I didn't really expect anything of today in the first place. I know things like my fundamentals are sort of iffy, but I went out anyways, so I gotta give myself props for that. So, I'm almost home, when... I see a pretty blonde girl walking, with no one near by. Ahh fuck it... I thought in my head.
Me: "Hey, I just thought you were cute *pregnant pause* (she said thanks here), and I wanted to come say hi."
Me: "Hi, I'm Darren."
She introduces herself.
I ask how her day's going
She says shes going to a friends house
Me: "I notice you have an accent."
Her: "New zealand."
Me: "Wow, that's quite far away. What do you think is different about Vancouver?" (placed my palms out like I was presenting our surroundings/ Vancouver)
Her: "A lot of things."
Me: "Like what?"
Her: "Well, for one, the homeless problem."
Me: "Yeah, that's a real big problem here. There's homeless people everything downtown and stuff."
Her: "Yeah."
Me: "What else is different?"
Her: "You guys call coins loonies and toonies, I think thats so weird."
Me: "Well, what do you call it back in New zealand?"
Her: "We just call it one dollar and two dollar."
*I forgot what I said in response, something like: "haha thats pretty funny..." (should've said something like: "Yeah, I agree with you, I don't know why people had to go and complicate things")
Me: "Lets stop right here for just a few minutes."
Me: "So, what made you come all the way here?"
Her: "I like travelling."
Me: "Hmm. You like travellling?" (sort of surprised here lol, dunno why, oh I know why - because she told me this without me having to ask)
Her: "Yeah."
Me: "Where's the coolest place you've gone?"
Her: "Hmm... *pause for a few seconds* thats a hard question... probably... (said where but I forgot)
Me: "Why there?"
Her: *told me but I forgot what she said*
Me: *positioned myself a bit closer to her and said: "And all the handsome men huh?" (said slowly and with a nudge on her upper arm)
Her: *fake laugh I think*
Tried to close
She said yeah, but I have to go right now
So I was like: "Yeah, just give me your number and we'll figure something out..." (halfway through the sentence I was reaching into my pocket to grab my phone, I had a feeling that she wasn't gonna resist - dunno if this was a good idea though, should slow down my movements and seem like I'm not waiting for her reaction)
She gave me her number!
And I sent her an icebreaker text two hours later. Will text her tomorrow to schedule a date!

Note on logistics: She said she was a traveller. Hopefully that means she has her own spot! Then I will just have to worry about going to her place. What would be a good way to figure out if she lives with roomates, friends, or parents? Without making it sound obvious.

Pros:
was in the last 5% and decided, "hey, what do I have to lose."
deep dived
used chase framing at the end to lighten up conversation and proceed to close
got her to stop before closing = investment
felt that the conversation was short and to the point - probably like 3 minutes
slowly spoken opener and tried to maintain slowness throughout conversation

Cons:
fashion off
exhausted and disappointed
weak vibe before I talked to her
reached for my phone before she said yes to date
had to move to her side and nudge her while setting chase frame
should've said something about the loonies and toonies thing lol

Okay so I want your guys thought's on the interaction. What were the pros and cons of it?

Also, I met her yesterday (Friday @ 5 pm). And so I called her today @ 3 pm (Saturday). She said she was at work and couldn't talk. So I said: "Okay, I'll just call you another time. Bye."

So my question is... now what? I can't call her tonight because it's Saturday night. So should i call her tomorrow? (Sunday, between 11 am and 2 pm, just like what Chase's article, "Making the first phone call to a girl" says). I just don't want to call her tomorrow and then have her be like: "I'm at work." I was just thinking of sending her a text tomorrow saying: Hey _____. What's your schedule looking like for the upcoming week? Was thinking we should grab some coffee, pronto! Tell me what you think

But what do you guys think? Should I just try calling her again tomorrow afternoon? After all, I am a beginner, and I shouldn't be texting, I should be calling and getting used to it. But I feel that in this situation, texting would be more to the point and would get her out faster...rather than making the phone call, bantering, then asking her out 3 days later. Isn't that moving too slow? Plus, I really want to get her out by Monday or Tuesday, because my house is free then. But then again, maybe she has her own place. Please tell me what you think. I really appreciate it.

 

[ProblemSolving]

Haha D,

You just stumbled upon one of my Jedi Mind Tricks by taking out your phone before she said yes to the date. Here's how I number close. At a high point in the conversation I take out my phone and start typing her name in it, asking her to spell it while doing so. Then I point the phone directly at her chest and say, "Put my number in my phone and we'll grab a coffee sometime this week."

This technique puts so much social pressure on them that they give you their number without really having to think about it, since you've already made the decision for them. Provided you're sexy and made them feel comfortable during the approach, they WILL want to see you again.

Once you have the number, don't bother calling. Just send out a text like, "Hey J! Let's grab a coffee soon. What's your schedule like for the week?"

 

[Pato]

Hey Dern!

I agree with ProblemSolving that calling isn't really necessary and that just a text is fine. Something like "Hey ___! Nice meeting you today. Save my number -Dern" a couple hours afterwards. Within the next couple days syou could ask for her schedule and try to set up a date then (something like what ProblemSolving suggested). I'm not very experienced but I feel like this would work best.

I just feel that in general texting is better and easier than calling, and it let's her respond whenever she can. When you call her, there's always a chance she doesn't answer or can't talk at the time, and texting can get rid of this problem. I also think that if you call her too many times when she can't talk or doesn't pick up then it could feel like you are chasing her.

As for getting the number, I think that pulling the phone out either before or midway through is a good idea. ProblemSolving's idea should work well and I'll have to try that one out.

-Pato

 

[Dern]

Thanks for the advice guys!

I am definitely going to text her tomorrow afternoon then. Way more simpler than calling her, gets right to logistics, and if she's at work, she'll see it after and make her decision then.

 

[Dern]

Okay, I texted her two hours ago. No response. If she doesn't respond by the end of the night, what should I do? Worst comes to worst, I was thinking of calling her 2-3 days later (Tuesday or Wednesday). What do you guys think? Should I even move faster, and call her tomorrow? Or would that just label me as annoying?

 

[Pato]

Honestly, I usually try to stay away from calling in general, and also in situations like this. Especially since you already called her and sent her a text, it would feel like you are chasing her. Just give her some time to respond, and if she doesn't then I'd maybe send another text in a couple days. If she doesn't respond to that second text then you might want to cross her out and move on. If you do want to call her, then I'd suggest waiting a few days, and make sure you call her at a good time. I'd recommend reading https://www.girlschase.com/content/what-do-when-girl-doesnt-text-back, and that should give you some ideas. Hope I helped, and good luck!