What to look for when deep diving: VABEs

[TwoNameGame]

Overview
Deep diving can be a powerful tool, but you need to know what to look for.

While studying international management, I was introduced to a cool leadership topic that lent itself to pickup: VABEs.

• Values: What does she consider important?
• Assumptions: What do she take for granted?
• Beliefs: What convictions does she hold?
• Expectations: How does she think things will turn out?

Deep diving is meant to answer these 4 questions. Why? People like those they open up to and you want to know how or if to seduce her. VABEs form the core of other's behaviors and their perception of the world. Combine them to ensure a good seduction.

The article in question has a leadership bent, but I found it helpful in providing a concrete description of how to understand others and lead them towards a desire outcome. After all, men lead the interaction.

So why do VABEs matter?

Spoiler: Answer

People fundamentally hate having their VABEs opposed. If she isn't in tune with you, then the disconnect will grow at a rapid pace. Women trust those who are similar and understand them. This doesn't mean being a clone of her. It means sharing a perspective that satisfies her attempts to make sense of the world.

• Her values may not allign. Maybe she is a "no sex before marriage" type and you will face tons of Last Minute Resistance. Maybe she is spontaneous and complimenting it helps her connect (there is a great forum post I cannot find about how people try to live up to your compliments).
• Her assumptions strengthen her frame. If an HB has options, she will be more selective and you might not get a response even if she seemed interested. If an HB is constantly being chased, then you making her chase builds attraction. This is why pattern interrupts work so well.
• Her beliefs may conflict with yours. Women may feel your attainability is low despite you still thinking you have tons of room to grow. Women may feel you are mysterious enough to take you as a lover despite you not objectively proving you can be a provider.
• She expects something big. Maybe she expects you to be a good boyfriend because of your frame, but you just wanted a one night stand, so she feels used. Maybe she expects you to kiss her and you notice her escalation window, so she feels comfortable going to your place.

Using VABEs

You want to lead the interaction towards your goal. But the best leaders are those we choose to idolize.

Consequently, your best bet is to direct her towards something you want in a way she is receptive to. Ideally, she should agree that this is what she wanted from the start.

Spoiler: In practice

So, here are some tactics.

• Values: Screen her to find values conducive to game (ex. Spontaneous, adventurous, and whatever you like in a set). Avoid problematic women.
• Assumptions: Pattern interrupt to get her interested. "But TwoNameGame, don't people hate having their assumptions opposed?" Well reader, you need to know how to pick these battles. On one had, people will defend their most important frames and lead to difficult, yet winnable, frame battles which can break the interaction. On the other hand, people love pleasant surprises and having solid frame control is attractive. In short, be interesting, distinct, and stand your ground. Know how to rock the boat without ejecting her. Tease her for her habits, don't offend her heritage.
• Beliefs: Actively aim to understand her perspective to make sure she still believes you are attractive. Attraction is based on similarity, attainability (or value), and compliance.
  • Ensure she finds you similar yet mysterious.
  • Ensure she finds you neither too attainable or unattainable.
  • Ensure she actually finds what you offer valuable.
  • Ensure she feels comfortable complying.
    • Deep diving for beliefs will allow you to frame things in a more acceptable way. For example, a feminist would be more open to sex only after you run the Female Submission Gambit whereas it would be "overgaming" with an already submissive girl.
• Expectations: Set the right frame. Use a romantic frame or a sexual frame because you don't want her to see you as a mere friend. Get her open to the idea of being intimate with you. Deep dive to find out what she she expects. Some girls have bad experiences and expect things to end badly, so you need to build trust. Others expect you to fail shit tests, so you use unexpected answers based on what she thinks.

For example, you meet a girl who likes dogs because they are loyal, but you like cats. Clearly, she values loyalty, so showing her that you have longtime friends helps. She might assume you'd just be nice and agreeable, but you instead show your passion for cats. She believes cats aren't loyal, but you talk about how cats are just as loyal as dogs according to a study and your pet cat. You also use kino and sexual innuendo so she expects not to put you in the friendzone.

So if at the meat section of your market you find a timid woman who thinks no one is interested in getting to know her, and you use a direct opener, what are her VABEs so far? What should you do to pull her? What more do you need to know? Would it be a good idea to show her your value as a healthy, considerate vegan?