Observations When girls gets cold because you texting her friends

[trashKENNUT]

I find this quite confusing.

It happens to me in social circles, Not often, but it happens. I get a girl who is flirty, i talk to her, then ask her out. She give me a 50/50 answer. The next thing i know, i met her friend in public events, who told me that she is close with her, said i texted the other girl, flirting with her.

The thing is that her close friend's tone is borderline between cold and warm because she is generally friends with me. Is this kind of like value, social imbalances? if i am not mistaken.

Fill me in people. Anybody have the same experiences?

Zac

 

[trashKENNUT]

Any leads? It will be helpful.

Zac

 

[Chase]

Zac-

It happens to me in social circles, Not often, but it happens. I get a girl who is flirty, i talk to her, then ask her out. She give me a 50/50 answer. The next thing i know, i met her friend in public events, who told me that she is close with her, said i texted the other girl, flirting with her.

If it's a 50/50 answer, that almost always means she's not really all that interested. When she talks to her friend, if she tells her you texted and asked her out, and then tells her friend, "I don't know... MAYBE I'll go out with him. What do you think? I just told him I'd get back to him," or something worse, at that point it comes to their social positions relative to one another.

If you texted a girl who was lower in social position than the friend you ran into, you're usually going to get a cooler reaction - the higher status girl isn't interested in a guy someone lower status than her is on the fence about.

If you text a girl who was HIGHER in social position than the friend you ran into, you can get a reaction that's all over the map - she can be ice cold to you, because she doesn't want to risk being perceived as going after a man the alpha female of the group has more or less called dibs on; she can be cool to you, if she feels like you're beneath both the friend AND her; or she can be warm to you, or even HOT to you, if either she wants you because the friend wants you, or you are just not quite good enough for the friend, BUT you're still good enough for HER... and now you seem eminently more attainable than you did before.

The main things to keep in mind are: 1.) how does the girl you texted really feel about you and what emotion did she convey to the other girl, and 2.) what are the two girls' social statuses relative to one another (e.g., which one leads the other)?

Chase

 

[trashKENNUT]

Chase,

If it's a 50/50 answer, that almost always means she's not really all that interested. When she talks to her friend, if she tells her you texted and asked her out, and then tells her friend, "I don't know... MAYBE I'll go out with him. What do you think? I just told him I'd get back to him," or something worse, at that point it comes to their social positions relative to one another.

If you texted a girl who was lower in social position than the friend you ran into, you're usually going to get a cooler reaction - the higher status girl isn't interested in a guy someone lower status than her is on the fence about.

If you text a girl who was HIGHER in social position than the friend you ran into, you can get a reaction that's all over the map - she can be ice cold to you, because she doesn't want to risk being perceived as going after a man the alpha female of the group has more or less called dibs on; she can be cool to you, if she feels like you're beneath both the friend AND her; or she can be warm to you, or even HOT to you, if either she wants you because the friend wants you, or you are just not quite good enough for the friend, BUT you're still good enough for HER... and now you seem eminently more attainable than you did before.

The main things to keep in mind are: 1.) how does the girl you texted really feel about you and what emotion did she convey to the other girl, and 2.) what are the two girls' social statuses relative to one another (e.g., which one leads the other)?

Finally...... I AM SO HAPPY. I just could not understand it until now. All this years of lost!

Zac