What's new

Where did I go wrong?

EternalStudent

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
May 21, 2021
Messages
19
Got friendzoned by this one chick back in February. We didn't cross paths again until last week.
Caught her across the street on my way to the gym and said hi. She crossed over the other side of the street to give me a tight hug while we caught up. She offered me a ride since where she was going was on the way to where I was going.
Did some more catching up at the store we went to (with prolonged eye contact, starting up conversations when they began to fizzle out, etc) since I wasn't in a hurry to head to the gym, which was a building away. As we left and began to head out separate ways, she asked me to take down her number since she was carrying supplies and gave me a super tight hug before she took off.
I sent an icebreaker text about a minute later, worked out and went about my day. Didn't get back to her until about 6 days later with the following text:

what's good (her name), my bad for the radio silence; I've been swamped with projects, exams, and training
anyway, I hope the holidays treated you well

what's your schedule look like this week so we can grab a bite or coffee?


it's been radio silence from her end since. it's been about a week.

I was confused as to whether she changed her mind about how she felt about me. But I don't think a female platonic friend would act the way she did throughout the interaction. Plus, what else was I expected to do with that number? Also, the fact that she wasn't comfortable with the idea of us being alone (in a public place might I add) said enough. I ended up deleting her number and unadding her on social media since ghosting in a deal-breaker for me.

If anyone can give some insight as to where I went wrong so I don't repeat this in the future, I'd appreciate it. will give more context if needed.
 
Last edited:

ferrero

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Oct 5, 2021
Messages
38
I'm hesitant to give advice but I'll tag @Skills here, he can probably better answer your thread....

But, since I saw this on my phone and had to comment... six days is a long time to wait before responding, specially for such a brief interaction... you did good with a quick icebreaker text but then you let the momentum die down. I'm wondering if you could have / should have tried for an insta date.

Further, here's a good breakdown of why that icebreaker text isn't the best (of course the text you sent can work, but there are higher odds icebreakers to send)

You seem to have a decent handle on the interaction side of things by the look of it, but I suggest you read up on these short texting guides by @Skills to round out your skills (no pun intended).

Edit: why did you delete her number? She could have come back around...
 

Skills

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Nov 11, 2019
Messages
5,075
I'm hesitant to give advice but I'll tag @Skills here, he can probably better answer your thread....

But, since I saw this on my phone and had to comment... six days is a long time to wait before responding, specially for such a brief interaction... you did good with a quick icebreaker text but then you let the momentum die down. I'm wondering if you could have / should have tried for an insta date.

Further, here's a good breakdown of why that icebreaker text isn't the best (of course the text you sent can work, but there are higher odds icebreakers to send)

You seem to have a decent handle on the interaction side of things by the look of it, but I suggest you read up on these short texting guides by @Skills to round out your skills (no pun intended).

Edit: why did you delete her number? She could have come back around...

yeah there he can find the answers in those links... good job timo with the diagnosis, also curious, about the ice breaker text, since he did not get a reply either...
 
you miss 100% of the shots you don't take

EternalStudent

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
May 21, 2021
Messages
19
I'm hesitant to give advice but I'll tag @Skills here, he can probably better answer your thread....

But, since I saw this on my phone and had to comment... six days is a long time to wait before responding, specially for such a brief interaction... you did good with a quick icebreaker text but then you let the momentum die down. I'm wondering if you could have / should have tried for an insta date.

Further, here's a good breakdown of why that icebreaker text isn't the best (of course the text you sent can work, but there are higher odds icebreakers to send)

You seem to have a decent handle on the interaction side of things by the look of it, but I suggest you read up on these short texting guides by @Skills to round out your skills (no pun intended).

Edit: why did you delete her number? She could have come back around...
Well, I saw how active she was on social media a few days after my text so I took that as a lack of interest. I lose interest when a woman loses interest, so I didn't see a point in keeping her number at the time.

These texting guides do seem useful though. I'll make good use of it later, thanks.
 

EternalStudent

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
May 21, 2021
Messages
19
(late) Update: she messaged me on Christmas saying that she's sorry for not getting back to me, then wishing me Merry Christmas.

I wished it back to her but I took her not giving a counteroffer as a sign of lack of interest. Perhaps this is overreacting or misjudgment on my part, but I took her behavior listed in the original post as a test, just to see if I was still interested.
Thoughts?
 
Top