- Joined
- Nov 21, 2012
- Messages
- 16
Hey y'all Nick here,
*Note if you're reading this and having trouble understanding my train of thought, its ok, I realize my writing is all over the place and its mostly because of my state of mind right now... you'll read about it in a second.*
A little background on me, I'm 19 and in my second semester of college. I've had moderate success most of my life with pretty girls, but they always seemed to find me and "just happen." I've also always been a little different than most people, never quite part of the in-crowd. I like to think I'm a nomad when it comes to social hierarchy, and I enjoy being like that, I just want to be more flexible and have great social mobility. Ever since I came to college I realized the girls I was hooking up with were rather detrimental to my overall value. I realized that even though I've been told most of my life that I'm "handsome" or "cute" I have low self esteem and as a result I tend to attract low self esteem girls with a whole slew of problems. I didn't seem to mind at first because most of them have been cute/hot, but now I understand the importance of being with a girl who has a good/positive personality. Anyway, I'm into pick up because I want to have more control over my life.
So for the past week and a half I've been out and about on my college campus for hours a day literally approaching everyone. Not just girls, but just people who seem interesting.
Any who, I'm pretty confident that I've overcome a lot of my approach anxiety, which is great because just a month ago I was literally crippled when I tried to approach very hot girls. But now I have some new problems.
First problem, I can approach a cute girl and get her number rather quickly and easily, (Its actually A LOT easier than I expected) but I can't seem to follow up. When I set up dates the girls flake. I don't blame them, I know that I'm not getting them invested in me. Personally, I feel like I'm overwhelming the girl into giving me her number. I like to think I'm a pretty good looking kid who dresses well, so when I approach girls during the day (I only use direct approach, I tell them straight up that I think their cute) I feel its like a spur of the moment thing for them. (Funny side note, my favorite is when they tell me they they have a boyfriend, to which I reply "Its ok, phone numbers don't hurt" and then they give it to me anyway! I mean, it doesn't work all the time, but it has about a 50% success rate.) I don't know, I can just tell by my writing right now that my thoughts are erratic and all over place. Pretty much I need some help figuring our exactly where I AM and what I need to do to move FORWARD.
My second problem is definitely related to the first in a number of ways, but it has to do with my inner game. Ever since I started doing hardcore day game I get more and more of a feeling of isolation and weirdness about myself. I mean I already felt this way coming to college and I thought that if I do this approaching stuff it would help with it, but honestly when I'm out all day doing this I only feel more weird and lonely. The loneliness thing isn't too bad, I've always been a loner and I actually enjoy it to an extent, but I've also been out more talking to people and making friends so I'm not too worried about it. What I am worried about is my feeling of "weirdness." I've become socially savvy enough to understand that the way people feel on the inside is often projected onto other people, so I'm REALLY trying to shake this weird vibe off. Like I said, I've always been a little off and eccentric, and once again, I take pride in it, but this weirdness that I'm feeling is deep and psychological. I can tell, I can't concentrate on school work, I don't sleep my well and my dreams are absurd and disturbing.
I guess what it comes down to is I'm looking for people to "understand me" I know this is a very common thing for a teenager to be feeling, but its getting to the point where its seriously affecting my day to day life. Maybe its my age? My hormones? My lifestyle?
Anyway, if you made it this far and you feel like you have good advice for me I would really love some! I love this board and everyone's opinions so feel free to comment and critique!
Thanks!
-Nick
*Note if you're reading this and having trouble understanding my train of thought, its ok, I realize my writing is all over the place and its mostly because of my state of mind right now... you'll read about it in a second.*
A little background on me, I'm 19 and in my second semester of college. I've had moderate success most of my life with pretty girls, but they always seemed to find me and "just happen." I've also always been a little different than most people, never quite part of the in-crowd. I like to think I'm a nomad when it comes to social hierarchy, and I enjoy being like that, I just want to be more flexible and have great social mobility. Ever since I came to college I realized the girls I was hooking up with were rather detrimental to my overall value. I realized that even though I've been told most of my life that I'm "handsome" or "cute" I have low self esteem and as a result I tend to attract low self esteem girls with a whole slew of problems. I didn't seem to mind at first because most of them have been cute/hot, but now I understand the importance of being with a girl who has a good/positive personality. Anyway, I'm into pick up because I want to have more control over my life.
So for the past week and a half I've been out and about on my college campus for hours a day literally approaching everyone. Not just girls, but just people who seem interesting.
Any who, I'm pretty confident that I've overcome a lot of my approach anxiety, which is great because just a month ago I was literally crippled when I tried to approach very hot girls. But now I have some new problems.
First problem, I can approach a cute girl and get her number rather quickly and easily, (Its actually A LOT easier than I expected) but I can't seem to follow up. When I set up dates the girls flake. I don't blame them, I know that I'm not getting them invested in me. Personally, I feel like I'm overwhelming the girl into giving me her number. I like to think I'm a pretty good looking kid who dresses well, so when I approach girls during the day (I only use direct approach, I tell them straight up that I think their cute) I feel its like a spur of the moment thing for them. (Funny side note, my favorite is when they tell me they they have a boyfriend, to which I reply "Its ok, phone numbers don't hurt" and then they give it to me anyway! I mean, it doesn't work all the time, but it has about a 50% success rate.) I don't know, I can just tell by my writing right now that my thoughts are erratic and all over place. Pretty much I need some help figuring our exactly where I AM and what I need to do to move FORWARD.
My second problem is definitely related to the first in a number of ways, but it has to do with my inner game. Ever since I started doing hardcore day game I get more and more of a feeling of isolation and weirdness about myself. I mean I already felt this way coming to college and I thought that if I do this approaching stuff it would help with it, but honestly when I'm out all day doing this I only feel more weird and lonely. The loneliness thing isn't too bad, I've always been a loner and I actually enjoy it to an extent, but I've also been out more talking to people and making friends so I'm not too worried about it. What I am worried about is my feeling of "weirdness." I've become socially savvy enough to understand that the way people feel on the inside is often projected onto other people, so I'm REALLY trying to shake this weird vibe off. Like I said, I've always been a little off and eccentric, and once again, I take pride in it, but this weirdness that I'm feeling is deep and psychological. I can tell, I can't concentrate on school work, I don't sleep my well and my dreams are absurd and disturbing.
I guess what it comes down to is I'm looking for people to "understand me" I know this is a very common thing for a teenager to be feeling, but its getting to the point where its seriously affecting my day to day life. Maybe its my age? My hormones? My lifestyle?
Anyway, if you made it this far and you feel like you have good advice for me I would really love some! I love this board and everyone's opinions so feel free to comment and critique!
Thanks!
-Nick