No other fast decision makers here, huh? Well, maybe
@orkie123 is.
As far as I can tell, there are two approaches people take to decision making:
- SLOW TYPE: start from a state of uncertainty, then gradually, over time and careful, judicious trust building, arrive at a state of increasing certainty.
- FAST TYPE: start with strong initial instincts about something, then rapidly dig, probe, research, and screen to find out if your instincts are correct or were a false positive.
The oneitis AFCs who wife girls up in scarcity are generally slow types who wouldn’t do this if they had any choice, but the girl is demanding it and they feel like they have to to not lose her.
If you’re a fast type, you wife girls up exclusive to you fast after heavy initial screening (though not necessarily you exclusive back to them… if you are running one-sided monogamy, for instance. It is still more work than keeping them non-exclusive though; once they are exclusive to you, they have many of the demands and expectations of an exclusive girlfriend, they just do not ask as many questions).
I’m a fast type. I know the instant I first see a girl if she’s LTR material or not. It’s like a bolt from the blue. Then I just screen the shit out of her to see if she REALLY is or that’s just my boner talking. 80% of the time it’s the boner, lol. But that’s why I’ve written more on screening than probably any other guy in seduction or anywhere else. I just screen the ever-loving shit out of girls during the seduction (deep diving is more than just a technique; it is deep screening, when done right), in bed after sex, and over the first several weeks. By about 3-4 weeks in I know who she is 100% (or if she is the reserved type that hides stuff, she will be screened out by the end of that time period. Not a compatible personality type for me). I don’t think I’ve ever had anything happen with a girl past the 3-4 week mark that made me go, “Oh my God, I would never have expected…!”
But I do this with all kinds of things, not just girls. The speed with which I make most major life decisions would probably make most guys puke. That said, while it looks cavalier, I usually do a ton of deep research and deliberation, discussion, etc. I just do it all really fast. (the times I have skipped this step have led to mixed results though, I will admit. These incidents have learned me my lesson several times over. Yet I survive!)
That being said, I avoid putting anything about this or suggesting guys make big decisions super fast, etc., into my advice, since I know I’m an extreme outlier here.
Wouldn’t have it any other way, though…
Side note: I talk about decisiveness in this article:
There it is: the Big Decision. On the one hand, you've got Road #1. And it is a tempting choice. It seems like a great path to go down... maybe everything you want. Except you're not 100% sure it'll work out. And if it doesn't, you'll have lost all that time going down it. Then, on the other...
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