Women and Facebook...

[daviddreamer]

I get really bothered for some reason when my girlfriend acts "strangely" on facebook or skype or any other way we connect. (In a long distance right now).

First one - We had a good picture of us on skype and then she changed it to just herself
Second one- She made a post about me saying "He always knows the right thing to say! I love him so much" with me tagged in it....I saw this in my email and I was thinking oh that's sweet but then when I went to see the post it was gone so she had deleted it?

Question 1
1.) Are these bad signs?
2.) Is this stuff pretty irrelevant and should I just drop it and never bring it up or should I call her out on it?

 

[Little Jester]

Funny, I got on this morning and had some messages on FB to get back on and there I noticed in my feed the same thing: GF changed profile pic from me and her to just my girl... Something in the weather?

Seriously though, I'm not stressing it and I think you shouldn't too. She probably just likes to change her profile picture every now and then. The good one of the both of you was nice at the time, but has gotten old. Plus, she already displayed you (which was a good thing) and now she changes it up for now. Not a big deal. Besides.. It's just FB. It's all superficial. Maybe she thinks she looks more cute in her new solo pic than the one of the two of you. She most likely tends to want to look her best towards her family and friends. Doesn't nearly everyone on FB? Especially with girls, with their everyday big time investments in makeup, hair and clothes... Looks on FB is a big deal to them and what may look good to you, might be an awful picture to them. (my gf goes crazy about pics where her eyes are slightly different height. So she avoids using pics of her solo, or pics of us together, that I personally think and verbally state to her that she looks amazingly hot on, but she doesn't use'em because of this eyes thing. Weirdness)

Same with the comment. Maybe she'd think it would look cheesy in front of her friends and deleted it again... Who knows.. Normally I'd talk openly about everything with my GF, but if this one really got to you, I still wouldn't call her out directly asking her why she deleted it. I'd just honestly state to her like you did here, but with warmth and a smile, that you got the e-mail and you thought it was sweet and then you clicked it and then FB couldn't find it anymore... And that's it. See what her reaction is. Keep it light. She'll most likely be cool about it and tell you she deleted it and why. If she doesn't respond, move on (cause she thinks it's not a big deal). Only if she is starting to act nervous about it, then that might indicate a problem, but let's not go there.

 

[Thedoctor]

David,

This is just one more reason why I don't have Facebook. Even in long distance scenarios there are a ton of other ways to stay in touch. But...I'm well aware that a lot of people are going to keep their FB page so that's probably not the answer you're looking for.

Here it is: Do not say anything to her about this. Any acknowledgement to anything pertaining this way to FB is going to make you appear insecure. If there is something wrong in the relationship, you'd know in other ways, not just little things in FB:

-Maybe she's distant
-Maybe she's really busy all of a sudden
-Maybe her behavior has become cold towards you etc.

If nothing else has changed recently between the two of you, then you're overreacting about nothing. If things have changed and she is using FB to get a rise out of you, then the last thing you want to do is address it. That is very passive-aggressive behaviour and you should never reward it by giving attention to it.

If everything in your relationship is fine, then do absolutely nothing and stop stressing.

-John

 

[daviddreamer]

Thanks guys very good posts and put my mind at ease.