“I really don't feel comfortable going on an adventure with a stranger”

[readjusting]

Background: I met this girl on the train, she asked for my phone number, so I put my number in hers and used her phone there

Her (as I put in): Hey sexy!
It's Simmone
Me (next morning): Hey, Simmone. Let's go on that adventure this week. When you free?
Her (afternoon): Hi Tanmay. I don't know you like that at all and I really don't feel comfortable going on an adventure with a stranger

How would you respond?

 

[Richard]

Tip for the future; when you're texting a girl to meet up with her, send like 2-4 text messages to remind her of who you are OR get her comfortable and THEN ask her when she's free. When you just go for the gusto and ask her out upfront that early then 1) she likely doesn't remember exactly who you are and 2) it makes you seem desperate or a little clumsy.

If it were me, I'd probably go with something a little bit fun since she seems really cautious about you now. Something like:

Me: "Guess we'll have to work our way up to skydiving with great white sharks What do you say to catching a movie as a first step?"

My play is to make it easygoing and make it fun for her. I guess the other play is you could tease her for not being adventurous with a stranger (I think stuff like that is floating around the main site or Boards, actually) but I don't vibe with things like that over text message! =P

-Richard

 

[readjusting]

Richard, thanks a lot! I used the line, maybe something good will come out of it =P
Imma try out 2-4 texts to build more comfort before going for the close

Oh, by the way, she just responded. Super quick, isn’t it?
“I'd like to keep talking to you first before I decide to catch a movie with you”

What would you suggest? A bonding phone call, probably

 

[Richard]

Interesting. Texting back super quick (fairly normal when a girl is interested in you) but still hesitant.

"I find texting to be an unreliable way to really get to know someone. I'd be down for a phone call or casual lunch though "

-Richard

 

[readjusting]

This girl was a yellow light case.

Last text was:
“Okay, a phone call sounds cool. Not right now though I'm at work”
Calling a few hours later, no answer, she texted:
“I'm doing homework right now I'll call you later”

At this point I think attraction probably is dead.
I’ll just try a bunch of stuff, for education purpose.
Gotta pay my due to be the sex god.

 

[Richard]

IC,

Yeah, my fault, I forgot to mention that should she decide on the phone call (which I figured she would) and that you gotta leave it up to her to call you. With this breakdown where you were too eager to ask her out AND now too eager to call her she's probably not feeling it anymore.

Keep in mind in the future to send a few texts (2-4) with a girl before asking her out or setting up date details.

-Richard

 

[readjusting]

Richard,

That’s fine mate. I can always get a new one!

 

[Average]

Richard,

That’s fine mate. I can always get a new one!

Fist-pump!

 

[Michal]

Interesting. Texting back super quick (fairly normal when a girl is interested in you) but still hesitant.

-Richard

To me, it seems as if she understood "catch a movie" as "bang in my place". That might explain the hesitation.

 

[Fuck This]

You can text back something to the effect of:

"Well I'll be holding a one on one question and answer period at the Starbucks on the corner of 5th and Broadway. Admission is free to all who RSVP in the next 5 minutes."

If she responds after 5 minutes,

"Well the free offer has expired, but I suppose you could buy me a coffee"

If that doesn't make her laugh, then she's not into you and meeting her would have been a waste of time anyway. Next............