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Approach Anxiety

nexus321

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Jun 1, 2014
Messages
63
I keep getting approach anxiety. For 2 weekends I've been going out and I can't make myself talk to women. I keep thinking I'm bothering them or they'll be mean and try to hurt my feelings. Lame right. I am also following Neil Strauss's rules of the game and I was supposed to do the exercises in the book. Like today I was supposed to ask 5 women where I could find trendy clothes but I couldn't even do that. I walked into a 7/11 and asked when the mall closed.

Sigh, I just don't know how to stop thinking so much and just start talking. How can I beat AA??????
 
the right date makes getting her back home a piece of cake

Sub-Zero

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Sep 6, 2014
Messages
836
Only thing you can do is to do it.

There really is no other way bro.

I've been on this site for a while, most of my approaches are from clubs, social circle, hired guns. Day game is still extremely hard for me and I have read the approach anxiety articles countless times. Nothing.

I feel just like you, it feels weird, if a girl wanted to talk to us she'd let it be known. I go through the same exact thought process, it's been years.

And by the looks of it you been on here too for awhile.

Don't let time pass you by man, just keep going out until you can do it, just keep going out until you feel the strength to do it.

That was something I wish I did; if you keep going out no matter what, even if you don't approach for weeks, maybe months, you'll say fuck it sooner or later.

I'm going to work on day game as well.
 

nexus321

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Jun 1, 2014
Messages
63
Sub-Zero said:
Only thing you can do is to do it.

There really is no other way bro.

I've been on this site for a while, most of my approaches are from clubs, social circle, hired guns. Day game is still extremely hard for me and I have read the approach anxiety articles countless times. Nothing.

I feel just like you, it feels weird, if a girl wanted to talk to us she'd let it be known. I go through the same exact thought process, it's been years.

And by the looks of it you been on here too for awhile.

Don't let time pass you by man, just keep going out until you can do it, just keep going out until you feel the strength to do it.

That was something I wish I did; if you keep going out no matter what, even if you don't approach for weeks, maybe months, you'll say fuck it sooner or later.

I'm going to work on day game as well.


Hey thanks for the advice man. You seem like a cool guy, what city are you in?
 

Sub-Zero

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Sep 6, 2014
Messages
836
I'm in Florida bro. What about you ?


nexus321 said:
Sub-Zero said:
Only thing you can do is to do it.

There really is no other way bro.

I've been on this site for a while, most of my approaches are from clubs, social circle, hired guns. Day game is still extremely hard for me and I have read the approach anxiety articles countless times. Nothing.

I feel just like you, it feels weird, if a girl wanted to talk to us she'd let it be known. I go through the same exact thought process, it's been years.

And by the looks of it you been on here too for awhile.

Don't let time pass you by man, just keep going out until you can do it, just keep going out until you feel the strength to do it.

That was something I wish I did; if you keep going out no matter what, even if you don't approach for weeks, maybe months, you'll say fuck it sooner or later.

I'm going to work on day game as well.


Hey thanks for the advice man. You seem like a cool guy, what city are you in?
 

nexus321

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Jun 1, 2014
Messages
63
Sub-Zero said:
I'm in Florida bro. What about you ?


nexus321 said:
Sub-Zero said:
Only thing you can do is to do it.

There really is no other way bro.

I've been on this site for a while, most of my approaches are from clubs, social circle, hired guns. Day game is still extremely hard for me and I have read the approach anxiety articles countless times. Nothing.

I feel just like you, it feels weird, if a girl wanted to talk to us she'd let it be known. I go through the same exact thought process, it's been years.

And by the looks of it you been on here too for awhile.

Don't let time pass you by man, just keep going out until you can do it, just keep going out until you feel the strength to do it.

That was something I wish I did; if you keep going out no matter what, even if you don't approach for weeks, maybe months, you'll say fuck it sooner or later.

I'm going to work on day game as well.


Hey thanks for the advice man. You seem like a cool guy, what city are you in?

I'm in Bergen Norway but I'll be studying in LA this winter.
 

NotJamesBond

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Jul 25, 2015
Messages
91
Hey homie, was about to make this same thread under a different title. Had the exact same thing happen. Saw a fine waitress at Chili's while I was getting dinner with a married couple I know (we're all 24) and I commented on how fine she was, and when we left they said I should go back in and ask her and I was so close to doing it but I just couldn't. I've been beating myself up ever since, haha. It isn't even that I care if she said no, I would still have the high of the fact I asked. It's just the approach itself. I was just going to go in, ask if she was single, but I couldn't. The encouragement from my newlywed friends certainly helped and will cement that it is acceptable to randomly ask, which is good. Whatever "defeat" emotion I got from this was because I just didn't do it versus if she said no. If she said no, I'd still have endorphins because there's plenty of fish and whatnot. It's just the principle of the thing but I am 100% there with you, man. As the other guy said, the only way to do it is to DO IT. Which means when you are IN THE MOMENT, you have to consciously stop thinking of the 1,000 things you could think about, and just go in. I don't know about you but I'm a pretty natural conversationalist otherwise. I don't think through or elaborately plan out what I say before I say it to random people or friends, so why should I do it to approach women? Applying this is very tough and you're not alone. Thanks for making me feel a little better as a matter of fact :p We really are like a drill sergeant to ourselves.

P.S. I'm going back to that Chili's next week with different people to try again lol, I'm mad at myself despite how detached you're supposed to be from how the interaction was "supposed" to go
 
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