Approached girl in gym, she said she doesn't give her number to strangers.

[razir110]

Hi everyone!

So there is this cute girl that is ALWAYS staring at me in the gym. Btw I am pretty ok with talking to women and I am not really intimidated to approach.

She always comes with some dude, but I just assumed fk him, I'll approach anyway. 2 days ago I just passed next to her and said hi, she replied and that was it, just to build a little connection there... Today she was on some machines away from me, but then she came to a machine right next to me when she saw me there. Well for me that was the green light.

I said I love her hair and she ended up being a hair dresser. So we had a 3-4 min talk then I went back to workout. Then a few minutes later I was leaving, I approached her gain and said we should meet for a coffee. She said she didn't give her number to random guys, so I said something like I get her cause girls are asking my number all the time so I know the feeling, well I was trying to go round her defense, but with no success. She said she's not giving it, and she needs more time to get to know someone before she goes on a date with the guy. Well I went to my car and I saw her staring at me from the gym window (the walls are glass) so guys...

two questions:

one: how to approach a girl in a situation when..... it's kinda difficult to talk to her for like 10-15 min? It's the gym people are working out so the conversation gets interrupted all the time. Or should I just stay there next to her talking as nothing was happening and fk her workout, just be "annoying"? What about a waitress for example? How would you go round the fact that you can't talk for long?

two: What should I do now? Just talk to her next time we see each other, stay there for few mins to build rapport and then ask her out again? I just feel she is more in control now because I approached her but then couldn't pass her defenses, so I am not in a chaser position, but I don't feel on top.

 

[Space]

I said I love her hair and she ended up being a hair dresser. So we had a 3-4 min talk then I went back to workout. Then a few minutes later I was leaving, I approached her gain and said we should meet for a coffee.

razir110,

I missed some vital information from your report. Such as did you introduce yourself to her as soon as you physically could do so with a handshake, in which she pulled out her hand first? Subtle magic.

 

[foggy]

I said I love her hair and she ended up being a hair dresser. So we had a 3-4 min talk then I went back to workout.

Why not get her number here?

Then a few minutes later I was leaving, I approached her gain and said we should meet for a coffee.

The fact that you split up the interaction into two like this was probably a little weird, and your second approach was likely a little too abrupt for her. If you didnt ask her to coffee by using a yes ladder to build up compliance, along with a qualifier, then it was extremely easy for her to object.

She said she didn't give her number to random guys, so I said something like I get her cause girls are asking my number all the time so I know the feeling, well I was trying to go round her defense, but with no success.

You were trying to build similarity with her, which was the wrong strategy - you should have focused on addressing the underlying emotion that was causing her to object, which was related to this:

she needs more time to get to know someone before she goes on a date with the guy

She framed it as a date, and what you should have done was frame it as a no-pressure hangout where the two of you could get to know each other a little better.

how to approach a girl in a situation when..... it's kinda difficult to talk to her for like 10-15 min?

In environments where there's not a lot of time to talk, base your interaction off chemistry, not time.

It's the gym people are working out so the conversation gets interrupted all the time. Or should I just stay there next to her talking as nothing was happening and fk her workout, just be "annoying"?

I would put my workout on hold if a hot girl was talking to me, wouldn't you?

What should I do now?

Where would you say your attainability is at with her?