- Joined
- Dec 22, 2024
- Messages
- 14
Hi all,
I'm following this interesting recent thread about a coworker, and I would have a follow-up question.
I understand that sleeping with coworkers can result in a lot of bad outcomes. What about bad outcomes when you don't sleep with them?
I suppose that coworkers in auto-rejection can also do nasty things to you. Do you have some bad experiences to share here? And tips how to deal with it?
I have one bad experience. A few years ago a cute coworker of mine was showing interests in me. Over the course of seven months, we got a bit closer, there was a kind of attraction peak around month 5, then a slow burnout in months 6 and 7, and then she entered in auto-rejection. Over the next two months, she started acting rebellious towards me and trying to boycott my work. This peaked when, a week before the winter holidays, I managed to crack an important problem, but could not fully implement the solution, and just shared my ideas with her and other colleagues, and left a presentation. When I came back from holidays, I discovered from my boss that she was claiming to have solved the problem, and that she didn't even read my presentation because it was not clear. Thus she was clearly trying to steal the solution from me.
The girl was way younger than me, and she was actually very good at her job. If I tried to finger-point her directly, it would be "an experienced male employee finger-pointing a younger female employee with a lot of potential", which would certainly look bad for me. The best that I managed to do was to persist around the problem and assist her in solving it. She did make a few mistakes when solving it, so I could jump in, help solving it, and still get some credit.
ps: two months later my boss invited me to substitute him because he was leaving for another project, the girl was very impressed and started flirting with me again, but anyway that situation should have never occurred...
I'm following this interesting recent thread about a coworker, and I would have a follow-up question.
I understand that sleeping with coworkers can result in a lot of bad outcomes. What about bad outcomes when you don't sleep with them?
I suppose that coworkers in auto-rejection can also do nasty things to you. Do you have some bad experiences to share here? And tips how to deal with it?
I have one bad experience. A few years ago a cute coworker of mine was showing interests in me. Over the course of seven months, we got a bit closer, there was a kind of attraction peak around month 5, then a slow burnout in months 6 and 7, and then she entered in auto-rejection. Over the next two months, she started acting rebellious towards me and trying to boycott my work. This peaked when, a week before the winter holidays, I managed to crack an important problem, but could not fully implement the solution, and just shared my ideas with her and other colleagues, and left a presentation. When I came back from holidays, I discovered from my boss that she was claiming to have solved the problem, and that she didn't even read my presentation because it was not clear. Thus she was clearly trying to steal the solution from me.
The girl was way younger than me, and she was actually very good at her job. If I tried to finger-point her directly, it would be "an experienced male employee finger-pointing a younger female employee with a lot of potential", which would certainly look bad for me. The best that I managed to do was to persist around the problem and assist her in solving it. She did make a few mistakes when solving it, so I could jump in, help solving it, and still get some credit.
ps: two months later my boss invited me to substitute him because he was leaving for another project, the girl was very impressed and started flirting with me again, but anyway that situation should have never occurred...
