Can She Still Fall In Love? ...

[JDM]

I have a question I suspect you have deep insight into ...
(beyond the obvious, "she's not into you", "move on", "time will tell", etc.)

Here is the quick version:

If somebody hasn't "fallen" in love with you in 5 months, can they fall in love with you after 7 months?

If they are worried they won't fall in love with you (though she says not too worried), is that still a flag she never will?


Here is my longer version:

What do you do with somebody who ...
Says she really, REALLY likes you (and shows it touches you, thinks of you, texts you, misses you)
Can't stand to go a day without seeing you
Feels good when she sees you
Misses you when you are not there
And says if you were gone, it would break her heart ...

BUT
Also says, she's afraid she won't fall in love with you.

If it hasn't happened already, why should it happen in the future?
Or has it happened already, and she just doesn't realize it?

I asked her what it was like when she was in love before ...
She said she wanted to be with him all the time
She said she thought about him all the time
She said it didn't matter what they did, it didn't matter whether they talked or not.

I did notice when she got done saying this, and realizing that's how she says it's like with me ...
She asked me if I thought she was already in love with me?
I told her only she knows that and only she can answer that.

But the fact she's still worried whether she'll fall in love with me sure seems like one big giant flag.

Related, about 3 months ago, it feels like I asked her the same questions and got the same responses ..
How do you feel when you see me? "I feel good"
How do you feel when I'm not there? "I miss you"
How would you feel if I were gone? "It would break my heart"

So it seems to go nowhere ... fast.

Some say she's already in love, but doesn't realize it.
Some say she's stuck and won't move forward.
Some say give it time.
Some say if it was gonna happen, it already would have.

Side Note -
She says I'm cute and handsome.
She knows I have hot friends that are girls and has seen them (social proof, pre-selection, etc.)
She thinks I'm smart, confident, attractive, fun.
She thinks I create a better life for her

 

[Seppuku]

Hey JDM,

It is all in the mindset.

I used to think that girls needed to be in love with me before I can take them to bed. At that time, I took 6 girls to bed in five years. Last year, I started thinking that I need to take girls to bed before they can be in love with me. I took 27 girls to bed in the last twelve months. I have currently three girlfriends in another country, plus four in this country. There is no question that my new mindset is just much more efficient.

Don't let her dance, because she will dance forever. Stop giving her so much attention because as a man you're above her, not below. Stop spending so much time looking for signs she likes you. And just stop worrying whether she's in love or not and give her the good fuck that she needs. Once you have done that a couple of times, she will be in love with you.

Girls don't *need* to be in love. They need to be fucked, but just cannot make it easy for you. It is a very simple truth but we tend to forget about it way too often.

Cheers,
Seppuku
PS. The more you wait, the harder it will be. It's already been 5 months. You have no time to lose man!

 

[JDM]

Good stuff ... I like the mindset.

I was wondering if it's simply all about the horizontal mambo.

I'm a fan of efficiency and effectiveness, so I like the attitude and approach.

JD

 

[Seppuku]

She's looking for a man that can make her submit sexually. Believe me, the horizontal mambo makes a major difference

 

[JDM]

I like that angle.

What's a quick rundown of your best techniques, mindset, and approach to do just that?

 

[WayOfHand]

Totally agree with Seppuku here. Would like to add that if the person under question here is relatively young the concept of "love" might be a bit difficult. Hell I think its difficult for anyone. But anyways its easy to compare everything into the intense feelings that you get at the start of relationships and think they are the love. Then when relationships mature the feelings get milder.

What love really is? Its very subjective question. I think I like Seppukus take on this and focus on the things I can control, like her orgasm

 

[Seppuku]

Hey JDM,

I used to think that girls needed to be in love with me before I can take them to bed. At that time, I took 6 girls to bed in five years. Last year, I started thinking that I need to take girls to bed before they can be in love with me. I took 27 girls to bed in the last twelve months. I have currently three girlfriends in another country, plus four in this country. There is no question that my new mindset is just much more efficient.

Don't let her dance, because she will dance forever. Stop giving her so much attention because as a man you're above her, not below. Stop spending so much time looking for signs she likes you. And just stop worrying whether she's in love or not and give her the good fuck that she needs. Once you have done that a couple of times, she will be in love with you.

Girls don't *need* to be in love. They need to be fucked, but just cannot make it easy for you. It is a very simple truth but we tend to forget about it way too often.

That pretty much summarizes the right mindset. It is very well in agreement with what is being taught on this website. If you can really internalize this way of thinking and make it yours, you will have no problems with girls moving forward. But it takes some time and many trials and errors before you can integrate this mindset.

About the techniques, here many guys have different styles. It is about finding the style best suited to you. But since you ask me, what I do in a nutshell is:

• * contact online (I'm a bit specialized in online dating)
  * first date in a cozy lounge with drinks and snacks
  * Make her comfortable with me. This is (1) make her talk a lot about herself, and (2) touch her a lot
  * If the vibe is right and she follows my lead, I take her home after about two hours of face time, under any pretext e.g. "let's listen to some latin music at my place"
  * at home, I serve her a glass of wine, make her comfortable, and escalate

It has worked pretty well for me. It's not the only style possible, other guys do well with different styles.

Cheers,
Seppuku
PS. Another note. The above works best for a girl you just met. If you've been around her for months, it will be harder. But it's no excuse not to try anyway!

 

[lordkai5]

Leave her for a while
Because at this rate, you're getting nowhere.


The problem is, you're always there when she needs you, therefore you don't seem as valuable.
Cutting off connections would give her some time to reflect how much you mean to her.
After a month or two, be direct with her. Always be straightforward, its good no matter what. Either have her take the relationship or not.

 

[Hector Papi Castillo]

You should be the one who is doubting whether or not he can commit/fall in love. It should not be her. That means you're the one-down.

Man is darkness. Woman is light. She should be trying to show him the light of love, acceptance, compassion, etc. If you're on the other side, you need to find the darkness within you.

Jump into the abyss. It will do you good.

Hector