What's new

Cold approaching in cultures where "no one" does it

Black

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
May 15, 2014
Messages
102
I'm in a very small city in a rather backwards part of Europe; but most specifically in a place where people basically keep their distance from strangers and strictly stick to their social circles. Local men are infamous for being cold, formal and distant (and never approaching).

Anyway, online sucks here (too few people), social circle is. . . well. . . mostly white collar foreigners who think street-approach videos are staged and never throw any crazy parties just in case, very few attractive girls.

. . .so I'm moving to cold approach a way or the other. Actually, I've already started in bars and clubs. Not enough yet. . . but it's there, I've began; comparatively, I wasn't doing sh*t before.

I'm thinking about day game too; lot's of pretty girls during my commute (for one), a lot of time idling around bus stops and the like.

I've already read some comments here that is kind of special to day game in places like this; in a positive way i.e. no other guy does it.
On the other hand, when the situation arrives - I feel terribly out of place and my blood freezes.
Where I come from, bystanders maybe would/could laugh at you if anything, but it was accepted. But here?

So what are the caveats to day gaming in a rigid society like this? If any. . .
. . or is it 100% upside?
 

kalyan

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Feb 11, 2016
Messages
137
You already got a good reply from another member but I want to add a point.
Seems like you have the fear of what OTHER people will think when you approach: what if a guy, old lady, group of friends think when they see you? A few things to consider.
First of all, people are going to admire your bravery, and feel a little uneasy. You know why? Because they know they can't do what you did. They'd be like "woah, this guy's got some balls talking to her" some guys might poke fun at you, say something like "who the fuck does he think he is p, talking to a random chick like that." But the fact is no different: they're nervous they can't do the same, and they're jealous.
Even if a girl completely shut you down, even if she told you she didn't talk to you, you're reaction would be what people judge you on. I was once with a group of friends, and I approached two women way older than us, and they rejected me. You know what I told my friends? I was laughing on my way back, and told them "it's so funny, turns out they're married!".
Finally, 3 other things to consider:
- most people won't notice that you approached. If they do, most people don't care.
- it doesn't matter what they say, because they're going to forget about you. They'll probably forget your face after a week. Plus, I don't think anyone is going to remember that time a few months ago where they noticed a guy hit on a girl on the bus and got rejected/ had a conversation with her/ took her number.
- as long as you get what you want (increasing your skill with women), then, really, to hell what people think. After 5 years, they'll be the same, whereas you'll have a ton of approaches in your history books and a lot better technique
 

lao che

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Apr 21, 2013
Messages
492
cold approaching is just talking. it isn't a circus act - a performance that you announce to everybody in the vicinity. saying you're in a place where "no-one cold approaches" is like saying you live in a place where no-one talks.
most people don't know what's going on anyway. it's not like you'll draw a crowd of people staring and pointing. because you dared to talk to an unknown young lady. no-one will know that she wasn't already a friend of yours. and even if they can tell, they are not gonna know that you didn't really only need directions or whatever, and even if they do, they will probably be quite impressed. but they are eventualities that probably don't matter. no one is paying attention to you, except, hopefully, the girl you just stopped to compliment her on her colorful hat
sorry didn't read other replies. just my initial reaction
 

Black

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
May 15, 2014
Messages
102
Thank you - all three.

I was hoping I'd come back with some lay report from cold approach. . . but anyway. . . I'm hooking up with this girl who lives in one of these cities I hang out at; she tells me of all these guys cold approaching her at the restaurant, on the street, on public transport.
So that - and other small things - totally eliminates any doubts I had. It might not be PUA-land (luckily for me) but it's definitely happening.
It's just the social circle I was hanging out these last months that thinks that I'm crazy and that "someone will call the police", blah blah blah

On with the work. . .
 
the right date makes getting her back home a piece of cake
Top