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Date Analysis-what's next?

rulesofloaded

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Dec 1, 2019
Messages
14
First of all, hi everyone! I am new to the forums,and for some time I have sought to improve myself in many ways(fitness,personality,dating).

I made a test for myself to see if I can get a girl I used to like and were close friends for a long time (as you may imagine, I used to be deep in the friendzone).

For the past 2 or so years in which I improved myself as much as I could,I cut off almost all contact with her.Not long ago,I texted her again.
We texted for 2 weeks before the date(she would always text first this time).I suggested a time to meet and she told me she was busy,to which I replied that I didn't know when I was free again.She agreed to meet me in the end.

This time around,there no longer was a needy,friendly,white-knightly me.I had an abundance mindset,a sexy vibe,a good body and good fashion.We actually talked quite a bit about sex through texting,even though she has no experience whatsoever.

She was a bit late for the date,but I didn't let it affect me.Since I wasn't around the parking lot we agreed to meet,she was looking for me.
When I got there,we hugged(quite some time) and I also noticed she had makeup on(she rarely puts on makeup).

The date was rather short,and it was totally obvious she was very nervous(hands in pockets,filler words during conversation,lack of eye contact,overall awkwardness).I made her a few compliments and touched her(caressing the hands,face,and playing with her hair.Years ago, she would never let me touch her like this).I told her we should sit on a nearby bench,to which she didn't agree(maybe I should have persisted?) so we continued walking.

At the end,I let a little silence build and grabbed her chin as to manhandle her(I did not kiss her however).Her head was slightly lowered(a sign of submission?) and we were staring into each other's eyes.The situation turned awkward soon,and I think I messed up by not kissing her at this point.2 hours after the date,I sent her a message telling her I loved seeing her,to which she responded "me too:)".

That was two days ago.Considering I want to bed this girl,what would be the best course of action?Have I messed up by not closing properly?
Just to clarify,this is no longer a case of oneitis and I am no longer crazy for this girl.

Thanks in advance.

EDIT:I also told this girl I would be meeting some other girl after.That was a big mistake..did I ruin attainability with this one?
 
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Grand Pooba

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Dec 6, 2012
Messages
1,458
EDIT:I also told this girl I would be meeting some other girl after.That was a big mistake..did I ruin attainability with this one?

Generally not a good move, lol. Don't tell girls you're leaving a date to go see another girl. But you can instead say you have plans later and let her imagine it instead.

At the end,I let a little silence build and grabbed her chin as to manhandle her(I did not kiss her however).Her head was slightly lowered(a sign of submission?) and we were staring into each other's eyes.The situation turned awkward soon,and I think I messed up by not kissing her at this point.2 hours after the date,I sent her a message telling her I loved seeing her,to which she responded "me too:)".

Based on how this date ended it seems like she had fun and is still in play. You can try now inviting her out for a second date, and since you've already spent quite a bit of time on Date 1 getting to know her, I'd suggest going for an at home date. Try inviting her out to cook with you - meet her at a grocery store and then come home and cook a basic meal. Then you can watch a movie together and escalate to sex.

Sounds like she's into you, though!
 

rulesofloaded

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Dec 1, 2019
Messages
14
Thanks for the input. I'll try to set up the date location at her home,so I'll be able to build comfort more easily.
 

Cody Lyans

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Mar 8, 2019
Messages
140
Eek... Not to judge, but trrry not to go after this girl like it's a grudge match. That's where you are making the mistakes.

So for example you told her about another girl rather crudely because you are still a bit butt hurt and wanted to flex.
Maybe not, maybe you were just following advice you read, but it's the same thing, a lack of composure leading to a slip up that is a bit callus.

Look, with this girl, just treat her like a new person, and treat yourself like a new person too.
I would just admit to her that I was hoping to develop things differently than the last time, and that I was thinking too much. Then offer to just grab a drink.
At the drink, just be sensual and open about things, and touch her. But don't get nervous or awkward around sexuality with her, just kiss her cheeks, rub her hands, and let the kiss happen.

She is liiiikely to withdraw at some point to reassess so make it clear through your actions you aren't holding a grudge and you are treating her like a totally different person who you can appreciate as a woman
 
you miss 100% of the shots you don't take

rulesofloaded

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Dec 1, 2019
Messages
14
Thanks for the advice, Cody.I mentioned meeting another girl in an attempt to build social proof,but it was too much and totally unnecessary.
 

Tony D

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Jul 26, 2018
Messages
434
If she's letting you touch her face on the last date, and she agrees to have a second date, then it's on. You say she's got no experience? You mean she's a virgin? If so, then when you do get her alone, in a bed, you'll have to go through deflowering her, which kinda sucks. So make sure you ask her if she wants to go there, otherwise you may be having twelve dates before she sleeps with you.
 

rulesofloaded

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Dec 1, 2019
Messages
14
Update:
Second date was absolute trash,if you can even call it a date.

On the first scheduling,she flaked.I reacted with something like ''ok''

The second time I gave her a choice of times.She texted me when she was outside.I go out,nobody there for like 5 minutes.
I go back in. 5 minutes later,she sends a message asking where I am.
I go out.I spend 10 minutes with her,during which she pretty much avoid all touch,proximity and eye contact.Every time I'd take a step towards her she'd make a step back and even mentioned ''it's good this way''.She did say we should grab some hot chocolate,and I threw the ball in her court saying ''you'll tell me when''.
The girl said we'd keep in contact,asking which I prefer: she texts first or I text first.I told her I'd rather have her text me first since I'm quite busy.
I have no intention on answering any other messages from this one.I barely got a hug out of her,somehow.
Oh well.Onto the next one.
 
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