Dating as a (too grown up) student

[Ameno11]

Hello everybody,
I'm new to this forum, but not to the site. I already read several articles on girlschase and I found most of them eyeopening, so thank you to all the authors for the works they did.
I want to start posting on this forum with a question that I was asking myself for a while and for which I couldn't find a satisfying answer. But first, I would like to make a little premise, English is not my mother language and although I'm trying to do my best to make this post as clear as possible, some mistake will be unavoidable.

Now to the question...

I'm a 27 years old man from Switzerland, and still a student. I'm doing my last year of master degree in Tokyo after which I plan to get a job. For this reason I am also very tight with my budget.

The problem is that most of the women around my age are already working, and the ones I prefer tend to have a good career as well. I previously had women telling me things such as "other people tell me that I'm stupid to date a student" or "you are just a student you will understand once you get a job" or "you are a kid to me" and other similar things that suggest that they aren't taking me seriously even though I don't act plainly immature. Moreover I didn't have an easy life when I was younger, so I know how difficult it can be at times.

Some people suggested to me that I should date other younger students and while I know there are a lot of cute girls in university, most of them seem too childish for my tastes (especially in Japan). So my question concern dating women specifically around my age, 24-30 years old.

Is there something I can do to improve my situation? I feel completely stuck and I don't know how to turn around my situation.

 

[Fuck This]

I think they are looking to see if you can share their "REAL WORLD" experience of having a full time job. Can you? What sort of shared experiences can you refer to?

I think you need to point out that you still have to earn money for school and that you are well aware of the economic realities of being an adult. and instead of just putting those years of formal education behind you as fast as possible, you explored the world to get a different perspective on life before you bogged yourself down in the daily grind. You are a passionate man whose passion is to live a full and varied life in the brief time we have here on Earth. Even after finishing your education you will still be a student of life, and you hope she will be also. For learning to always be learning is a noble pursuit.

Deliver that while gazing deep into her eyes with all the conviction you can muster. You are demonstrating that you are driving the ship and that you have your priorities and you are going after them on the path you choose.

 

[Ameno11]

Thank you for your reply, I really appreciate your effort
Honestly, when I was thinking by myself I also had a similar perspective, but don't know why I've never put that out this way when talking to a woman (might be because of stress?).
I'll try to be more mindful of that in my future dates and see if something changes.

 

[trashKENNUT]

Ameno11,

Girls who don't like you, will try to shame you or use Asian values, when it comes to your age. It happens in Asia too. Kind of like the marriage shaming thing. Women are like that. Cunt like that.

Anyway.... i just have something pop out from my head. That's why i say it.
Not really nice things.

Zac

 

[Space]

Girls who don't like you, will try to shame you or use Asian values, when it comes to your age.

Asian values? What's that?

 

[Ameno11]

Ameno11,

Girls who don't like you, will try to shame you or use Asian values, when it comes to your age. It happens in Asia too. Kind of like the marriage shaming thing. Women are like that. Cunt like that.

Well I can't agree with you, because first I'm sure that in one case she liked me and she were keeping testing, secondly I wouldn't generalize and talking about "Asian values" like if every single woman in Asia share exactly the same values. Moreover the women I mostly dated here were grown up outside Asia or in an international environment (I find them more appealing), so they don't fit the stereotype in any case.

 

[trashKENNUT]

Space,

Asian values? What's that?

In this context, it's more of like i am a "good girl", or virtue signalling of some sort.

secondly I wouldn't generalize and talking about "Asian values" like if every single woman in Asia share exactly the same values. Moreover the women I mostly dated here were grown up outside Asia or in an international environment (I find them more appealing), so they don't fit the stereotype in any case.

You taking things too literal. Problem of most guys btw. There's a difference between imply and fact/statement. Perhaps we on the internet, i might have come off as the latter.



Zac

 

[Space]

Space,

Asian values? What's that?

In this context, it's more of like i am a "good girl", or virtue signalling of some sort.

Really? And did you check my link for more information on the phenomenon as well? Disclaimer: I haven't been to East Asia. I only know about the region from books and movies. And a lot of Asian tourists come to the West. And I've heard a really good anecdote about this. A guy wrote when he visited Asia first, he could able to distinguish the beautiful Asian girls. Which makes me wonder if this yellow fever thing might be true? That you have actually go to Asia first to be able to appreciate Asian ladies.

 

[Ameno11]

You taking things too literal. Problem of most guys btw. There's a difference between imply and fact/statement. Perhaps we on the internet, i might have come off as the latter.

I just expressed my disagreement, not a big deal anyway

 

[trashKENNUT]

Space,

Really? And did you check my link for more information on the phenomenon as well? Disclaimer: I haven't been to East Asia. I only know about the region from books and movies. And a lot of Asian tourists come to the West. And I've heard a really good anecdote about this. A guy wrote when he visited Asia first, he could able to distinguish the beautiful Asian girls. Which makes me wonder if this yellow fever thing might be true? That you have actually go to Asia first to be able to appreciate Asian ladies.

What's your point?

i leave a passing remark and then you ask me to explain something that is about demographic, than it is about dating. This is why i am saying that you are taking things too literally.

There's context. There's also dating. This is dating question. You asking a demographic question.

My explanation went over your head when i say "In this context, it's more of like i am a "good girl", or virtue signalling of some sort."


Are you purposefully being an idiot because you want more knowledge or ideas thrown around? or do you genuinely can't distinguish 2 completely different things?

Zac

 

[trashKENNUT]

Some people suggested to me that I should date other younger students and while I know there are a lot of cute girls in university, most of them seem too childish for my tastes (especially in Japan). So my question concern dating women specifically around my age, 24-30 years old.

and I'm ASIAN btw.

And i know what you talking about, And yes, they are childish in a sense, more so today's first world girls in the Asia because you don't need dick when you have animae.

That's one society problem

Zac

 

[Space]

Zac,

Important disclaimer here: I've registered here for about a week ago. I realized that in real time, even though Chase claims this is the most popular (most popular, or just most visited? these are two, different categories) dating advice site on the planet, the forum is not so lively, only a few people are contributing. I've raised about five issues of my interest, none of them generated a single reply yet. So I got a little bored and I thought at least as I registered here, I contribute to other people's topics to start any interaction.

From your answer I'm still not sure if you've clicked on the Amazon link for the book, Black Passenger Yellow Cabs I shared above. Which is about a lots of interesting things including dating, sex, and culture. So you are Asian? Cool. In case you are ever interested in an outsider's view on your culture, here's an interesting read you might want to pick up some time.

What's your point?

i leave a passing remark and then you ask me to explain something that is about demographic, than it is about dating. This is why i am saying that you are taking things too literally.

There's context. There's also dating. This is dating question. You asking a demographic question.

My explanation went over your head when i say "In this context, it's more of like i am a "good girl", or virtue signalling of some sort."


Are you purposefully being an idiot because you want more knowledge or ideas thrown around? or do you genuinely can't distinguish 2 completely different things?

Zac

I have a little hard time connecting the dots here. But the best definition I ever came up for Asian values is that it means different things to different people. Hence, the linked book as a response was intended to be understood in a snarky-humorous fashion. I'm not the OP. I'm not really married to this topic. Just giving my 2 cents while being a little bored as a new member of the forum, hopefully giving some value to some along the lines.

 

[trashKENNUT]

Space,

this is the most popular

This is also the most NON PC dating website, ever. *Trump's voice*.

the forum is not so lively, only a few people are contributing. I've raised about five issues of my interest, none of them generated a single reply yet. So I got a little bored and I thought at least as I registered here, I contribute to other people's topics to start any interaction.

There's 2 forums. One is the Onedate forum, the paid forum. They likely active there.

Which is about a lots of interesting things including dating, sex, and culture. So you are Asian? Cool. In case you are ever interested in an outsider's view on your culture, here's an interesting read you might want to pick up some time.

From what i can understand, the sypnosis

it is that a foreigner who cleans up girls overseas, and then you wonder why you are not the same. Well, most foreigners don't clean up with girls just as much as many foreigners inflate the asian girls they sleep with.

That's the fact that you must see past the veil, first.

Zac

 

[theonlinedatingpua]

I think you just need to work on expanding your social circle to include more of the kinds of women that you are interested in. Perhaps join grad student social groups, or look for opportunities outside of the university. The stuff you quoted that girls said to you are just shit tests for the most part. If they liked you enough they won't care if you're a broke student. Work on being fun, and building social value when in a group. If anything they might be sensing that it's an issue for you, and responding as you would expect.

 

[Space]

[Last time I had the sense that no one is engaging with my content, now I have the opposite problem; I suddenly became involved with too many interactions back and forth I can't keep up with. But I try. Baby steps.]

Zac,

Space,

this is the most popular

This is also the most NON PC dating website, ever. *Trump's voice*.

Personally I don't care about political correctness or the lack of, but I value a positive environment and a valuable resource, a good community, and results.

the forum is not so lively, only a few people are contributing. I've raised about five issues of my interest, none of them generated a single reply yet. So I got a little bored and I thought at least as I registered here, I contribute to other people's topics to start any interaction.

There's 2 forums. One is the Onedate forum, the paid forum. They likely active there.

That's probably a good idea for Chase to focus on paying customers, but my marketing mind still can't figure out what's the basic marketing funnel utilized here go gently convert free users to paying ones. I find the choice of free stuff to be already overwhelmingly confusing here, I can't even figure out with which of the available free roads most new users are supposed to start with. But more on that later.

Which is about a lots of interesting things including dating, sex, and culture. So you are Asian? Cool. In case you are ever interested in an outsider's view on your culture, here's an interesting read you might want to pick up some time.

From what i can understand, the sypnosis

it is that a foreigner who cleans up girls overseas, and then you wonder why you are not the same. Well, most foreigners don't clean up with girls just as much as many foreigners inflate the asian girls they sleep with.

The point of the book is not whether the black protagonist cleans up with Asian ladies or not. Nor is the reason I brought it to the conversation.

I'm not the OP. I'm not really married to this topic.

That's the fact that you must see past the veil, first.

I don't understand what do you want to say here. I've had the sense that you may have constructed one identity out of me and the thread starter, Ameno11 and talking to said constructed identity. I certainly have no idea what veil do you think I need to see past. Does anyone understand what is going on here and how Zac's veil thing has anything to do with what I've said in this thread before? I've certainly lost the line on this one.

I find it possible that you put words in my mouth I didn't say. Not a biggie. It seem to me that it have happened to Hector as well. (My best understanding. Hector: I answer you later! That would take a little longer. Thanks for your understanding!)

 

[trashKENNUT]

Space,

but my marketing mind still can't figure out what's the basic marketing funnel utilized here go gently convert free users to paying ones. I find the choice of free stuff to be already overwhelmingly confusing here, I can't even figure out with which of the available free roads most new users are supposed to start with. But more on that later.

Content marketing. Content marketing is not always straight forward. It's messy.

The point of the book is not whether the black protagonist cleans up with Asian ladies or not. Nor is the reason I brought it to the conversation.

Ok, you want me to consider reading it. Ok whatever.

I've had the sense that you may have constructed one identity out of me and the thread starter

Yes, of course. I need to address you in some fashion, right?

First image, you give me the idea that you are a guy who have problems when girls tell you that they don't date you. Well, that's the bullshit they trying to sell.

Second image of you, you think that every foreigner is impregnating everyone and you not one of them. Errr no? that's not true

Zac

 

[Space]

Does anyone understand what is going on here and how Zac's veil thing has anything to do with what I've said in this thread before?

I've truly and honestly lost the line with Zac on this one. In fact, not just on this one. If anyone could give his third person perspective, I'd truly appreciate it!