You affected serious change in your social life in a very short span of time. Very encouraging to read. Reading your opening post on this journal, I can identify with many aspects of your starting situation, so that compelled me to read the rest of the thread. One thing I will take away from this is to be action oriented and try to hold myself accountable by starting to write in my own journal thread with more frequency, and when I do I want to be writing about actual my actual experiences in putting the things I learn hear into practice.
- Joined
- Dec 20, 2012
- Messages
- 798
Thanks man, I haven't really kept this up to date as I would have liked but mainly because things have been going great and I haven't had time... which in itself is sort of a good thing 
You're on the right track man, sounds like you're doing great.
You're on the right track man, sounds like you're doing great.
- Joined
- Dec 20, 2012
- Messages
- 798
Hello world!
Well obviously I totally haven't kept this up to date. However... the upside is: Things are going so awesome I just haven't had time!
Here is my world at present after the goals I set out at the beginning of this journal:
Work/Career: I'd like to have really invested a lot more in this but I wanted to get balanced. I spent as much time as I needed. We've been very busy and things are going great however. After some moves in our team I am now 2nd in command on the team only after our Lead... I just need to keep this on course and it's all roses. Nothing much else to add right now.
Social Life: This was a big one for me. In some ways even more so than just picking up women. I found myself in a position where my social circle had just reached zero. I am living in a foreign country and I made a lot of moves with people I had known since I moved here. Some of them have moved away, some of them have dropped off the planet and settled into relationships and some were just not a healthy influence on my life and I decided to cut them for my own long-term good.
This left me with... well... nothing.
I looked down many routes. I joined some sports leagues, some social events, even some meetup groups. Were they all a raging success? No, I didn't meet lifelong friends at every single one of those, mainly due to the random nature of the people you meet at different events but I DID continue to go out to new events and places and I've made many, many friends. And the best thing is I now have friends from different circles. Some are into nights out, picking up girls, just having parties, some like to go running, play sports, watch sports, etc... some like to hit the city for nice dinners, movies, etc... and I've managed to cross members of some groups with others which in turn has helped me and them alike.
Social Anxieties: Let's face it. I hate labels and self diagnosis but if I had a gun to my head I'd describe myself as an introvert. I read up on it a little though and there's a lot of BS on the web about being introverted. Like we are all socially retarded ad there's no "cure". Totally un-true. I just learned to accept it. Being introverted means I cherish my alone time, it means I am a thinker, I analyse things. It doesn't have to mean I am anti-social however.... I can be the most social guy in the room when I want to be, but if I am just not in the mood or I'd rather have a quiet night in by myself... I've just accepted it... it's perfectly ok. I can stay in tonight, watch some Netflix, eat pizza, relax and I'll hit the town and paint it red tomorrow. I used to have this awful feeling if I sat alone in my apartment on any given night like I am a loser. But I am not... I accept that I need my "me time" and I make sure I use it to rest up and be on my game the next day.
One thing I have noticed recently is this... and I don't even know how this happens: If I go out alone. I will meet new friends. Last weekend I had a busy Saturday and it was too late to hit the town so I just decided to go to my local pub by myself for a drink. Within an hour I was in great conversation with a new group of friends I had met.... I even pulled that night. Never in a million years would I have done that a year ago. How could I pull a girl when I was alone? Same thing happened the previous week. I was out of town for work and went out a few nights. Every single night I just went to a few bars and met people to hang with. I didn't manage to pull any girls to the hotel but I did meet a lot of girls and made out with 2. Again... this was just ME going out ALONE in a city I had NEVER been to before. Amazing!
I don't even know how this happens but it does... on any given night I can go out alone and find people to hang with and use them as social proof to meet women. I am so happy about this.
Pick-up: Here is the big one. I am certainly no Chase Amante, Franco or any of the other top guys on here.... BUT! I made a few realizations this year. Before 2013... I had some girlfriends in my life. I've slept with some girls. But I had never been with more than 1 individual girl in a single calendar year. I was either in a bad relationship or none at all.
Since January I have lost count of the women I have met. I have even lost count of the amount of women I have kissed or made out with and even fooled around with... I DID however keep a rough count of the number of girls I've slept with and I've shocked myself. I've slept with WAY more women in the first 9 months of this year than I have in the previous 27 years of my life combined.
I won't go into all the things I've learned. I would go on forever. However, it's amazing. I knew about pickup for years. I read all the eBooks, all the hardbacks, watched all the YouTube videos but for whatever reason it always seemed like a pipe-dream. I WANTED the life... but I could never see myself doing or something the things I read and saw. For some reason it just wasn't ME. But this site has given me all the tools I need. It's a much more "real" approach to things. Instead of scripted lines or routines, funny hats and goggles or silly games... this site taught me to be me. But an incredible me. The ME that was always there but locked inside and didn't know what he needed to do. I don't feel like the things I do or say or weird or gamey. They are just me letting my inner self out and people like it!
As I said, there is always lots to improve on... always a long way to go, but just this year alone the leaps and bounds have been amazing... long may it continue.
Some recent success's:
- Went out alone and made out with 2 girls.
- Went out alone and pulled a girl home just this weekend.
- Set up a casual relationship with someone in my social circle and successfully set myself up as a non-boyfriend... zero drama, zero problems, lots of good fun for both of us.
- Went out (and am still working on things with) a gorgeous fashion model... I could have only looked and dreamed at such a girl before.
- Turned things around completely with some flaky girls: Could see her being difficult... set some chase frames then stopped initiating contact... guess what? She asked ME out
- Several Same night lays
- Just make-outs? Sure, I didn't pull them home or get things to go further in seeing some of them again but it was all part of the learning process: Moving fast. A make-out isn't even something I put a lot of mass in anymore, whereas some time ago, just a peck on the cheek would have seemed like such a big deal.
- For the first time in my life, I can genuinely say: I am happy being single. Sure, I'd love a relationship still with that awesome women. However, I won't let myself into a relationship until I find her... and there are lots of girls out there. When single in the past I always felt lonely and desperate. I'd end up getting into a relationship because I felt I lacked any options.
That's just a few things.
Things are going great. I'm enjoying life. Things are good
-
Well obviously I totally haven't kept this up to date. However... the upside is: Things are going so awesome I just haven't had time!
Here is my world at present after the goals I set out at the beginning of this journal:
Work/Career: I'd like to have really invested a lot more in this but I wanted to get balanced. I spent as much time as I needed. We've been very busy and things are going great however. After some moves in our team I am now 2nd in command on the team only after our Lead... I just need to keep this on course and it's all roses. Nothing much else to add right now.
Social Life: This was a big one for me. In some ways even more so than just picking up women. I found myself in a position where my social circle had just reached zero. I am living in a foreign country and I made a lot of moves with people I had known since I moved here. Some of them have moved away, some of them have dropped off the planet and settled into relationships and some were just not a healthy influence on my life and I decided to cut them for my own long-term good.
This left me with... well... nothing.
I looked down many routes. I joined some sports leagues, some social events, even some meetup groups. Were they all a raging success? No, I didn't meet lifelong friends at every single one of those, mainly due to the random nature of the people you meet at different events but I DID continue to go out to new events and places and I've made many, many friends. And the best thing is I now have friends from different circles. Some are into nights out, picking up girls, just having parties, some like to go running, play sports, watch sports, etc... some like to hit the city for nice dinners, movies, etc... and I've managed to cross members of some groups with others which in turn has helped me and them alike.
Social Anxieties: Let's face it. I hate labels and self diagnosis but if I had a gun to my head I'd describe myself as an introvert. I read up on it a little though and there's a lot of BS on the web about being introverted. Like we are all socially retarded ad there's no "cure". Totally un-true. I just learned to accept it. Being introverted means I cherish my alone time, it means I am a thinker, I analyse things. It doesn't have to mean I am anti-social however.... I can be the most social guy in the room when I want to be, but if I am just not in the mood or I'd rather have a quiet night in by myself... I've just accepted it... it's perfectly ok. I can stay in tonight, watch some Netflix, eat pizza, relax and I'll hit the town and paint it red tomorrow. I used to have this awful feeling if I sat alone in my apartment on any given night like I am a loser. But I am not... I accept that I need my "me time" and I make sure I use it to rest up and be on my game the next day.
One thing I have noticed recently is this... and I don't even know how this happens: If I go out alone. I will meet new friends. Last weekend I had a busy Saturday and it was too late to hit the town so I just decided to go to my local pub by myself for a drink. Within an hour I was in great conversation with a new group of friends I had met.... I even pulled that night. Never in a million years would I have done that a year ago. How could I pull a girl when I was alone? Same thing happened the previous week. I was out of town for work and went out a few nights. Every single night I just went to a few bars and met people to hang with. I didn't manage to pull any girls to the hotel but I did meet a lot of girls and made out with 2. Again... this was just ME going out ALONE in a city I had NEVER been to before. Amazing!
I don't even know how this happens but it does... on any given night I can go out alone and find people to hang with and use them as social proof to meet women. I am so happy about this.
Pick-up: Here is the big one. I am certainly no Chase Amante, Franco or any of the other top guys on here.... BUT! I made a few realizations this year. Before 2013... I had some girlfriends in my life. I've slept with some girls. But I had never been with more than 1 individual girl in a single calendar year. I was either in a bad relationship or none at all.
Since January I have lost count of the women I have met. I have even lost count of the amount of women I have kissed or made out with and even fooled around with... I DID however keep a rough count of the number of girls I've slept with and I've shocked myself. I've slept with WAY more women in the first 9 months of this year than I have in the previous 27 years of my life combined.
I won't go into all the things I've learned. I would go on forever. However, it's amazing. I knew about pickup for years. I read all the eBooks, all the hardbacks, watched all the YouTube videos but for whatever reason it always seemed like a pipe-dream. I WANTED the life... but I could never see myself doing or something the things I read and saw. For some reason it just wasn't ME. But this site has given me all the tools I need. It's a much more "real" approach to things. Instead of scripted lines or routines, funny hats and goggles or silly games... this site taught me to be me. But an incredible me. The ME that was always there but locked inside and didn't know what he needed to do. I don't feel like the things I do or say or weird or gamey. They are just me letting my inner self out and people like it!
As I said, there is always lots to improve on... always a long way to go, but just this year alone the leaps and bounds have been amazing... long may it continue.
Some recent success's:
- Went out alone and made out with 2 girls.
- Went out alone and pulled a girl home just this weekend.
- Set up a casual relationship with someone in my social circle and successfully set myself up as a non-boyfriend... zero drama, zero problems, lots of good fun for both of us.
- Went out (and am still working on things with) a gorgeous fashion model... I could have only looked and dreamed at such a girl before.
- Turned things around completely with some flaky girls: Could see her being difficult... set some chase frames then stopped initiating contact... guess what? She asked ME out
- Several Same night lays
- Just make-outs? Sure, I didn't pull them home or get things to go further in seeing some of them again but it was all part of the learning process: Moving fast. A make-out isn't even something I put a lot of mass in anymore, whereas some time ago, just a peck on the cheek would have seemed like such a big deal.
- For the first time in my life, I can genuinely say: I am happy being single. Sure, I'd love a relationship still with that awesome women. However, I won't let myself into a relationship until I find her... and there are lots of girls out there. When single in the past I always felt lonely and desperate. I'd end up getting into a relationship because I felt I lacked any options.
That's just a few things.
Things are going great. I'm enjoying life. Things are good
-
- Joined
- Jul 17, 2013
- Messages
- 1,496
Estate, I can say without exaggeration that this is a true inspiration for me. Over the next year, if I can replicate even half the achievements you've listed, I'll be shocked at myself. Thanks for showing what is possible! -Marty