How many girls in rotation?

[ulrich]

Hi guys, I’m just curious on how many girls you keep in rotation.
Specially for advanced guys.

When I am single and not in a heavy workload phase of my life, I usually juggle about 4 girls between open relationships, girls I’m dating and maybe a prospective girlfriend.

I’ve tried to juggle up to 7 before but at that point it became unmanageable. I started mixing who said what with funny results

Now I’m starting to have much more free time and I wonder if I should stay with 4 or try with more.

 

[Fluxcapacitor]

@uriel dude! This is a question without an answer, only what people have experienced but this won't reflect to your reality. I have an extremely busy schedule at the moment and only have 2 in rotation (possibly about to become 1) about 8 month ago I had 7 but this was unmanageable with my time frame and quickly became 3, this became unmanageable and became 1 who wanted a relationship that I couldn't give her. This became 0. She came back about 6 weeks later...

If you have time and want another one in rotation do it, if it falls apart that's fine. You know your limits. If it's easy add to it. If you can constantly keep 4 in rotation your doing a lot better than most guys who even struggle to talk to a girl nevermind keep them in rotation. The whole idea is to get good and meet more girls and if that means swapping some out of rotation or seeing one or two less frequently that's fine dude.

There was a post a few months back, I think by Grand Pooba about being busy helps with momentum, but he did say he had a girl he was sleeping with. If you already have girls your less outcome dependant because it doesn't matter. This is more a matter of what you want than what other guys do dude!

 

[BigPapa]

The guys with 4 in rotation I am curious how they manage to do it . More than 2 in the same time i find it kinda difficult to manage haha

 

[Grand Pooba]

I wrote about this - rotation and capacity - in this article:

How to Build a Harem, Pt.4: Tiers of Girlfriends and a Man’s Capacity

When your multiple-relationship lifestyle fills beyond capacity, one or more aspects will suffer. This advice will help you minimize heartbreak and stay on track. Welcome back to the How to Build a Harem series, aimed at making you proficient in the art of dating several women long term...

www.girlschase.com

Right now I have:
1 local mLTR
1 local FB (used to be 2 until Jan 2020)
1 international mLTR
2 international FBs

Total of 5; this doesn't count traveling girls that have stayed in touch and would be down to hook up again.

 

[ulrich]

The guys with 4 in rotation I am curious how they manage to do it . More than 2 in the same time i find it kinda difficult to manage haha

Hahahah.
Well, sometime you just hit it off with girls that end up being your friend with benefits for a very very long time.

There’s a couple of girls I’ve been banging for over two years.
Of course this comes and goes. They are not open to fuck always. If they enter a relationship, you have to get out of the picture.

Over time of doing it once and again you find a couple of these ones.

 

[BigPapa]

@uriel i guess it depends on how she perceives you , I had a couple of fbs at some point that we’re dating rich guys so they came for the sex and some spiritual and philosophical talk as they were better off in the relationships with those guys than with me .

usually the girls will try to make me commit and then will hate me for not committing so I get a lot of drama and that is mainly the reason I can not deal with more than 2-3 girls in the same time . Even after years of practice when I get drama out of nowhere it still affects my mood and also kinda feel bad for them as I am quite emphatic

 

[ulrich]

@uriel i guess it depends on how she perceives you , I had a couple of fbs at some point that we’re dating rich guys so they came for the sex and some spiritual and philosophical talk as they were better off in the relationships with those guys than with me .

usually the girls will try to make me commit and then will hate me for not committing so I get a lot of drama and that is mainly the reason I can not deal with more than 2-3 girls in the same time . Even after years of practice when I get drama out of nowhere it still affects my mood and also kinda feel bad for them as I am quite emphatic

I may be wrong but this sounds to me like it's not necessarily you, rather it's the girls you date.

I have a lot of troubles dating girls in relationships. It's practically impossible to me.
On the good side, my FBs are almost always single, unattached and open minded.

What is your niche?

 

[ulrich]

I wrote about this - rotation and capacity - in this article:

How to Build a Harem, Pt.4: Tiers of Girlfriends and a Man’s Capacity

When your multiple-relationship lifestyle fills beyond capacity, one or more aspects will suffer. This advice will help you minimize heartbreak and stay on track. Welcome back to the How to Build a Harem series, aimed at making you proficient in the art of dating several women long term...

www.girlschase.com

Right now I have:
1 local mLTR
1 local FB (used to be 2 until Jan 2020)
1 international mLTR
2 international FBs

Total of 5; this doesn't count traveling girls that have stayed in touch and would be down to hook up again.

Thanks @Grand Pooba.

Reading your article gives me a very down to earth perspective.
For what you write it seems that 5 is more or less a reasonable number of relationships one man can hold.

Thanks!!

 

[Grand Pooba]

For what you write it seems that 5 is more or less a reasonable number of relationships one man can hold.

5 is manageable with many FBs (i.e 1 mLTR, 4 FBs; or 2 mLTRs, 3 FBs; or 3 mLTRs, 2 FBs), but once you hit 4 mLTRs, all your time gets spent managing them. You can't really have 5 mLTRs, that's just too much, unless you're not working or doing anything else I suppose.
1-2 mLTRs and 3-4 FBs basically equates to sex 4-5 nights a week.

 

[DoWhatWorks]

Hi guys, I’m just curious on how many girls you keep in rotation.
Specially for advanced guys.

When I am single and not in a heavy workload phase of my life, I usually juggle about 4 girls between open relationships, girls I’m dating and maybe a prospective girlfriend.

I’ve tried to juggle up to 7 before but at that point it became unmanageable. I started mixing who said what with funny results

Now I’m starting to have much more free time and I wonder if I should stay with 4 or try with more.

All depends on what works for you and what your priorities are man. For me the sweet spot is 1 MLTR & 2 FB’s. Means I get laid 2-3 times every week & if I have a date with a potential new girl I’ll push a regular one week to accommodate.

If I had more time I could ramp it up but it would be for experiments sake. Seems to have diminishing returns to be sleeping with 6/7 different girls every week (for me) & I’d rather go to the gym or work on personal projects.

 

[ulrich]

Thanks guys!! I really appreciate your comments.

 

[BigPapa]

Don”t have a niche anymore , I like them in all sizes haha

what I noticed lately though is that somehow I like approaching medics as I find them very difficult to deal with since they are quite arrogant . They are smart but wired in the same time and feels good when you crack their armor . I do not really find them good for for fb or mltr or ltr because they are quite narcissistic and with a fake self esteem that is mainly pumped by their profession and sense of what they do is the most important thing in the world

 

[FunGuy]

I feel discriminated against because my number isn't an option, I have 0 lol.

How exactly do you guys go about framing these fb relationships? Do you let it be known from the start or do you guys just wing it and go by feel?

 

[ulrich]

Don”t have a niche anymore , I like them in all sizes haha

what I noticed lately though is that somehow I like approaching medics as I find them very difficult to deal with since they are quite arrogant . They are smart but wired in the same time and feels good when you crack their armor . I do not really find them good for for fb or mltr or ltr because they are quite narcissistic and with a fake self esteem that is mainly pumped by their profession and sense of what they do is the most important thing in the world

Well, maybe trying to get different girls from other sources will get you girls that will be more open to you not commiting.

On the other hand, I remember Chase saying once that how long a FBs relationship lasts is directly related to the value difference between you and the girl.
If the girl feels you are somewhat unreachable, she will take FBs for a long time. Girls that are “at your level” will be much less patient, ask you for commitment much sooner and leave if you don’t commit.

Having girls not be open to FBs could also be a sign that you are dating quite valuable women.

FBs are way easier if you are “dating down” in case you are interested.

 

[ulrich]

I feel discriminated against because my number isn't an option, I have 0 lol.

How exactly do you guys go about framing these fb relationships? Do you let it be known from the start or do you guys just wing it and go by feel?

In my case, it really depends on the girl.
I’m very ambiguous about what I want and I make a strong point on not doing boyfriend stuff (going to the movies, buying flowers, going to parties)... only date her in private and date her with at least 10 days in between.
Most girls get the message.

If some girl starts asking for a serious relationship, I say that I am not looking for one right now, I’m having a lot of fun but I could be open.

Some girls will stop accepting your invitations but it’s surprisingly a minority of them.

I’m pretty sure I read a great article by Chase about that. Totally worth it to look for it.

 

[BigPapa]

Well, maybe trying to get different girls from other sources will get you girls that will be more open to you not commiting.

On the other hand, I remember Chase saying once that how long a FBs relationship lasts is directly related to the value difference between you and the girl.
If the girl feels you are somewhat unreachable, she will take FBs for a long time. Girls that are “at your level” will be much less patient, ask you for commitment much sooner and leave if you don’t commit.

Having girls not be open to FBs could also be a sign that you are dating quite valuable women.

FBs are way easier if you are “dating down” in case you are interested.

Never really thought at things from this perspective and kinda makes sense what you are saying . Thanks for sharing your thoughts