I cold approach her while she was waiting bus with her friend. They came to my country for travelling.
For texting, I say that "her eyes are cute, did anyone say so to you" to try to set a man-woman frame, but she kinda make the interaction friendly by talking normal things without related to man-woman. I invited her for coffee and she agreed.
Nice try but the standard eyes compliment escalation is quite standard romanticised - afc style as we call it. Its not a cool way to indicate your interest. There are many better ways outlined across the forum.
Response Cue: Shes not ready atm.
Analysis: you know where she is. you need to work her to get her into a flirty fun loving mood.
Study text game. study game. Study verbal escalation.
For the date, we sit opposite of each other. I talked about normal topic, then after 30 minutes try to escalate by talking about relationship. So far she seems receptive to these topics. Finally, when I try to escalate to sexual topics by asking when is her first kiss
and how's her last sexual life, she seemed uncomfortable and shocked. I tone down a bit by going back to normal topics.
This is way too much to ask into for most girls. You need to read about transferring into sexual topics. one way could be to provide a safe environment as a guy for her eg via sexual frames for example. Look it up. Its obvious you have little understanding here which is fine but then understand that this ask is directly into her sexual life which is a huge thing for a girl to share. To not know this is quite ignorant from the girls side and eye widening as you saw. Fine. Learn from it.
Study sex talk and eg. transfers between topic types eg riker. Or look for articles here on GC on the matter i think there are a few,
Initially I tried to bring her to see the city view, since I think that I didn't do well on escalating and needed more time on that. However, that day was raining, and considering that she will be flying back to her home country two days later. I have no choice but to push this date to the limit by bringing her back to my place.
Fine w a view bounce and fine to aim to get to your place but its a risky move to take her there from the level you outline shes at.
I exited the cafe and drive my car to the entrance of the cafe while she was waiting there. At first she opened the back door and try to sit at the back. I was a bit surprized since all the girls I invited out will sit in front with me. So I told her to just sit in front. Now that when I think about it, her action of trying to sit at back was a bit rude to me, since it subcommunicate that I am her "driver". She then sit at the front, then asked if I know her place (hotel). Here, I was thinking the date was failed since she expect me to send her back to her hotel (she stay at the hotel with her friend). But I just ignored it by saying "yeah", and then continue my drive toward my place while continue some normal topics in the car.
like wtf. you bring her to your place without her agreeing to it? even her indicating she thinks youre going to her hotel?? TALK with her and get her to agree before taking her to your place. Im surprised she came in. This is an absolute no go.
Doing this when she thinks youre taking her to her hotel which she indicates is a sign youre socially odd and could be a signal youre dangerous for a girl. And with good reason - it is odd and unethical behavior. This is a key to stop doing
immediately.
When we arrive at my place, she seems a bit surprised by saying "Oh, so you bring me to your place". We then talking for a while, then I escalate by touching her hair and she seemed okay, but her expression looked moody. I asked why she was moody, she said because of period and today was a busy day for her. After some talking, I tried build tension by looking into her eyes. She then said "I know what you are trying to do. I am not in the mood right now, I have period." I dismissed by saying we are just chilling. She then asked "So you approach girls and try to bring them home? How many girls you bring back home so far?". I said a few but I don't really count, just enjoy the moment with the girls. She then asked if I use Tinder. I said long time ago, but not now since I prefer approach and interacting with the girl. I then asked if she went to any guys home (since she asked about Tinder, so I assumed she slept with guys before). She said she had one-night stand before, but not today since she has period. Her looks were also a bit moody/gloomy. She asked if she can have a cup of warm water. I then gave her warm water. She then asked if I read books, I said yeah I read non-fiction. We then talked for a while.
Ofcourse shes gloomy. you brought her there without normal consent and you then escalate physically.
youre coming suspiciously across as potentially dangerous
Shes just parading w the period.
This sorta action can lead to rape-type accusations fyi so correct yourself here immediately.
After a few failed attempt at escalating, I said I need to fetch her back to her hotel. She said yeah, and suddenly her expression become bright again, since she is able to go home now. She said "Are you disappointed tonight?". I said no I just go with the flow. I then drop her at her hotel.
the analysis is simple - see above.
You need to
- Correct your behavior as outlined right away. Dont bring girls home without consent especially when its obvious shes expecting something else. You really need to take this SERIOUSLY as its a total no-go to do this both legally and ethically.
- Learn game - youre honestly not ready for sex talk of sexual topics at the moment. Start learning verbal game if thats where your focus is. But learn the basics first. Ive outlined topics you can LOOK INTO yourself. You need to do the work cause its not a quick do this instead thing.
i assume youre either young or inexperienced. Just really try to understand the girls, basic social appropriateness and treat them well and safely.
