If i send her a post-date text it will be me triple-texting her

[Skjöldr]

Hey guys
So i went on a date with a girl today. Almost thought she was gonna flake. I sit in my car, parked and watching where we are gonna meet up. HB walks past me so i say fuck it, if she's gonna flake (it was already 5-10 minutes over and she didn't reply to my text that day) i might as well get my mack on for fresh chicks and when i step out i thiiink i see who it is and loe and behold it is, so i don't approach the fresh HB to go to the meeting place. Date was alright. There was a time constraint with her having to meet her friend for dinner and a movie, so i cut the date to under an hour, ended it on my terms and didn't try for a pull or a kiss but did seed the idea of my place.

Anyways, on to my issue. Here's the texting:

Spoiler: Texting

...
Me Thursday 09.48: Hey, hope you are doing good, i'll see you tomorrow
Her Thursday 17.26: Thank you - long day.. see you
Me Thursday 17.48: Then it's good when you get a smile on tomorrow and can let go of the stress before the weekend!
Me Friday 11.42: I'll meet you at the ice cream house

So since i already double texted her on the day, i'll be TRIPLE texting her when i shoot her my post-date text tomorrow. Just something simple like "Hey HB, thank you for a nice day yesterday!"

The alternative is betting that she will text me eventually... low odds... What are your thoughts?

 

[topcat]

Hey dude,

You're overthinking it a tad. Pay attention to the context. The last texts you sent were in reference to the date. That thread ended when you guys went on the date. The post-date text a day later, opens a new thread. So you're good. Go ahead and send the text.

IMO triple or double texting is problematic simply because you're trying to force a thread unnaturally (an example on this forum would be you making a second and third post in response to your initial post, just because forum members hadn't replied promptly enough and you got anxious - needy right?).

Best.

 

[Skjöldr]

Hey dude,

You're overthinking it a tad. Pay attention to the context. The last texts you sent were in reference to the date. That thread ended when you guys went on the date. The post-date text a day later, opens a new thread. So you're good. Go ahead and send the text.

IMO triple or double texting is problematic simply because you're trying to force a thread unnaturally (an example on this forum would be you making a second and third post in response to your initial post, just because forum members hadn't replied promptly enough and you got anxious - needy right?).

Best.

yeah makes sense, thought this too, still doesn't look good on the display when she sees 3 messages from me without any replies in between, but it is what it is.

 

[PalmaSailor]

I’m guessing the date was “meh” really

did you know about the time constraints before you went or did she spring that on you?

these days I don’t even go on a date unless I have both time and logistics to escalate.

 

[Glow]

if girls or guys dont answer i used to just copy paste send the same text.

its a low effort clear indication shes being rude. Most women will come back apologising.

If she doesnt answer i dont show up cause i consider her rough on comms or not interested enough. I know there could be more but ive just decided not to spend too much fuzz on "bad leads".

Next.

 

[Yaxir]

if girls or guys dont answer i used to just copy paste send the same text.

its a low effort clear indication shes being rude. Most women will come back apologising.

If she doesnt answer i dont show up cause i consider her rough on comms or not interested enough. I know there could be more but ive just decided not to spend too much fuzz on "bad leads".

Next.

copy pasting the same text .. sounds risky, no ?

and a bit needy too ?

i like the approach of quickly disregarding an uninvested girl as a 'bad lead', which i think is a strong reflection of the abundance mentality

i'd just like some discussion on this

P.S : i am an absolute beginner and just joined at the start of this month. I am just speculating and discussing to learn from you guys. For context, i don't have any dates/approaches under my belt yet. btw, Hi and Nice to meet you

 

[Yaxir]

these days I don’t even go on a date unless I have both time and logistics to escalate.

i need this kind of confidence in the dating arena

 

[Skjöldr]

I’m guessing the date was “meh” really

did you know about the time constraints before you went or did she spring that on you?

these days I don’t even go on a date unless I have both time and logistics to escalate.

i screen for time frame quick to decide whether im going for a pull and escalation or im gonna focus on having a good time with open loops and unended threads etc to set up a date 2

 

[Skjöldr]

if girls or guys dont answer i used to just copy paste send the same text.

its a low effort clear indication shes being rude. Most women will come back apologising.

If she doesnt answer i dont show up cause i consider her rough on comms or not interested enough. I know there could be more but ive just decided not to spend too much fuzz on "bad leads".

Next.

Haha i like that, it's ballsy. Idk, worth field testing
In this case there wasn't enough time for me to follow up with the same text, it would be sort of out of place but i can think of some situations where it is more appropriate and i wanna try it out

 

[Skjöldr]

Update:
I texted her eventually
Me: Thanks for yesterday it was fun Did you make some delicious pizzas? (She was having a movie night with her friend after date)
Her: Super delicious (She didn't say "you too" or anything, very low investment)
Me: What did you put on?
Her: Mozzarella, parma ham and parmesan
Me: Sounds dry (Tried to do a little pulling and also show less investment. Reason i said it sounds dry is that she didn't mention putting pizza sauce on)

That text was sent yesterday. Was thinking about waiting until tomorrow and just asking her how her week is going so far and then working my way to setting up a new meet. Do you think there's a better course of action?

 

[topcat]

Hey bruv.

Couple things,

One. I wouldn't have thanked her for the date. A simple "Had a great time with you yesterday " would suffice. If anybody is giving thanks it should be her.

Two. Opening that thread about delicious pizza was unnecessary. It can easily lead to a quagmire of pointless small talk that leads to no place good. If you're going to do that you should have some end goal in mind, to either boost her state or lead to a second meet up.

You dropped that ball when you told her the delicious pizza she made sounded dry...
Not only did you ask her to give you value by engaging her in conversation, you rejected that value immediately.
If she hasn't autorejected you after this consider yourself lucky.

Better would have been to overtly tease her (use emojis for emphasis) about her lack of pizza sauce (which she obviously used..) and have her banter back at you. Then follow this up by asking her schedule and setting up a date.

Easier still, leave her with the "had a great time" text. Then follow up later in the week and set a date, or immediately if her response is positive.

I used to text just like you. It's only after tons of girls going cold on me that I've learned to switch it up.

Keep pushing man.

 

[Skjöldr]

@topcat
What i like to do is after a date i send her a "Hey, thank you for today, it was fun!" or something (i see the difference in framing between saying "Thank you for today" vs "I had fun with you today". First one you are thanking her, second one you are stating you had fun with her, not because of her). Idk man i just like qualifying girls, but i can see how it can sometimes conflict with making her chase you and viewing you as the prize.

Besides the thank you i will follow up on something we talked about during the date or she said she was gonna do afterwards, not to pointless small talk, but to break the ice and quickly set up the next date. I like to move fast and strike iron while it's hot.

 

[Skjöldr]

Easier still, leave her with the "had a great time" text. Then follow up later in the week and set a date, or immediately if her response is positive.

What would a good follow up text be later in the week?

 

[topcat]

What would a good follow up text be later in the week?

“hey [name] hope your days going well (i sometimes omit this) thinking we should grab another drink soon. how’s your week looking?”

In this particular case I’d push for her to come straight to yours. Seed it as wine and a movie. Or something equally chill and cozy..

Lower odds but you waste less time if she isn’t on it.

 

[Fuck This]

Can your cook?

If you have a specialty dinner you can rock, send a picture of it . "I'm making Chicken Parmigiana Friday night. I've got enough for two. All you need to do is bring your favorite wine."

 

[Skjöldr]

“hey [name] hope your days going well (i sometimes omit this) thinking we should grab another drink soon. how’s your week looking?”

Yess but isn't that going straight to the close i used to text like this but i switched it up. Isn't it better to soft-close/increase her buying temperature first? @Skills basic text guide gave me sort of an epiphany.

 

[topcat]

Yess but isn't that going straight to the close i used to text like this but i switched it up. Isn't it better to soft-close/increase her buying temperature first? @Skills basic text guide gave me sort of an epiphany.

You’ve already been on a date with her. She knows if she likes you or not.

If she does make it easy for her.. and do it quickly. If she doesn’t the issue was on the date.

Increasing buying temp I believe is more for girls off the first approach. Am I wrong?

 

[Skjöldr]

Can your cook?

If you have a specialty dinner you can rock, send a picture of it . "I'm making Chicken Parmigiana Friday night. I've got enough for two. All you need to do is bring your favorite wine."

Yeah man i have sent some texts out like this regarding my pancake saying how we should share them or how i have a bottle of wine and it is too much for me i need someone to share with. But usually i don't name a day before i get her schedule first to make sure she's free that night.

 

[Fuck This]

If she is interested she may counter with another day. You can either accept it and keep the menu the same on the new day or joke that that is Baloney Sandwich night ....

Remember "you do what you feel like and she has a chance to join you" is your mindset.

 

[Skills]

Update:
I texted her eventually
Me: Thanks for yesterday it was fun Did you make some delicious pizzas? (She was having a movie night with her friend after date)
Her: Super delicious (She didn't say "you too" or anything, very low investment)
Me: What did you put on?
Her: Mozzarella, parma ham and parmesan

Yess but isn't that going straight to the close i used to text like this but i switched it up. Isn't it better to soft-close/increase her buying temperature first? @Skills basic text guide gave me sort of an epiphany.

Topcat was correct in the 130 entry, that conversational thread was awful, but you are correct, you need to soft close when she is given you something, in a high note. Topcat come on low odds unless after 3 lays when she is locked in