Hi guys I'm new to the forum and I just turned 40 and I like younger women but one of the articles on the girlschase site says not to pay for a date as to not get put in the boyfriend category, does this apply if you're dating a younger woman?
If you're an older guy should you still not pay for a date?
- Thread starter T-Mack
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I pay for the girl if I know the girl is poor and doesn't have money. No need to make it awkard lol.
Lately I'm playing around with getting to girl to pay half for hotels on the first date, haven't had a problem with it yet.
I'd say if you're wealthy and older it'd be harder for you to not pay and don't come off as cheap. It's doable, but is it worth it? One thing I recommend is not taking her to anywhere fancy, just take her for a coffee or a beer and all it'll cost you is $ 20. That way you won't look like a provider.
Elder guys on the forum might have more experience on it though
Lately I'm playing around with getting to girl to pay half for hotels on the first date, haven't had a problem with it yet.
I'd say if you're wealthy and older it'd be harder for you to not pay and don't come off as cheap. It's doable, but is it worth it? One thing I recommend is not taking her to anywhere fancy, just take her for a coffee or a beer and all it'll cost you is $ 20. That way you won't look like a provider.
Elder guys on the forum might have more experience on it though
Jesus, 20 bucks for a coffee and beer?.. what kind of beer and coffee is that
I like the first date to be in a place where we can simply talk, usually after lunch, so some cafe THAT HAS SOFAS SO WE CAN SIT NEXT TO EACH OTHER. This one is a must. Easier to get touchy and invite her home afterwards.
About the bill, my first dates are usually around 5 bucks, so no problem to pay. If she offers to split, I insist I'll pay, if she insists back, we split.
Second date I expect her to offer to pay/split. If she doesn't it's a red flag. But if we are already sleeping together then I may keep it as a sex relationship.
My 2 cent
I like the first date to be in a place where we can simply talk, usually after lunch, so some cafe THAT HAS SOFAS SO WE CAN SIT NEXT TO EACH OTHER. This one is a must. Easier to get touchy and invite her home afterwards.
About the bill, my first dates are usually around 5 bucks, so no problem to pay. If she offers to split, I insist I'll pay, if she insists back, we split.
Second date I expect her to offer to pay/split. If she doesn't it's a red flag. But if we are already sleeping together then I may keep it as a sex relationship.
My 2 cent
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razir110 said:Jesus, 20 bucks for a coffee and beer?.. what kind of beer and coffee is that
Two coffees or two beers^^ I sort of made an educated guess regarding the market value of beer and coffee in US. I'm way off the mark, huh? :d
I look at it as don't put yourself in a position where there is something to pay for.
The idea is you are meeting multiple women often and costs build up. Frugality is a necessity, but you have to avoid looking cheap.
If you lead with a nice dinner and drinks with a woman you don't know, how do you reward her for getting to know you (in the biblical sense).
Last coffee date I had, she arrived before me and already had her coffee. We walked and talked. She brought up a follow up date and I never followed through since that weekend I had a better option.
Other options are events with pair of tickets you have anyway or free tickets but require reservations before hand. "Hey I've got the tickets, you got drinks?"
Make the experience the draw. Watch a sunset, hike to a waterfall, feed the ducks at the park, watch "your nephew's Tball game" , go to the lake to watch the submarine races, etc.
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Once she has demonstrated she is worth having around (your criteria) then you can spend money on her as you see fit.
The idea is you are meeting multiple women often and costs build up. Frugality is a necessity, but you have to avoid looking cheap.
If you lead with a nice dinner and drinks with a woman you don't know, how do you reward her for getting to know you (in the biblical sense).
Last coffee date I had, she arrived before me and already had her coffee. We walked and talked. She brought up a follow up date and I never followed through since that weekend I had a better option.
Other options are events with pair of tickets you have anyway or free tickets but require reservations before hand. "Hey I've got the tickets, you got drinks?"
Make the experience the draw. Watch a sunset, hike to a waterfall, feed the ducks at the park, watch "your nephew's Tball game" , go to the lake to watch the submarine races, etc.
More
more
Once she has demonstrated she is worth having around (your criteria) then you can spend money on her as you see fit.
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I'm in my late career. The girls I date are twenty years younger, in relatively modest jobs. The money I make each month is many, many times more than what they make. It would be very unfair (and cheap!) of me to ask them to split. So I don't have any problem paying for the date.
I have other ways of disqualifying myself as BF candidate.
Cheers,
Seppuku
I have other ways of disqualifying myself as BF candidate.
Cheers,
Seppuku