Inner game "Newbie Assignment".

[TheRuralJuror]

Hey guys!

I think I've come to the realization of what my problem is when it comes to women, my inner game. Now my understanding of what inner game is, is depending on how you feel inside, your thought process, negative/positive thoughts about people, Your thoughts about yourself, basically how you view the world. If I'm wrong PLEASE correct me.

So with that being said, I've realized this when I wanted to go out and approach women (at work for example) and "my inner game" wasn't right, meaning I wasn't feeling all that good, I couldn't move a muscle! I wouldn't speak unless spoken to! And I'm a cashier! Smh.
But when I'm feeling good, I can talk to customer, whether attractive or unattractive. I even had the guts to tell a lady her eyes were beautiful. Even though she was Spanish and didn't understand a word I said! It was awkward, but I did it! And I know that's small, but give me a break! I'm learning. Haha. But like everyone says, that's just a feeling, and it goes away obviously. (Very quickly sometimes).
I can keep giving examples of my failures to approach, but I don't have the time right now. Haha
I think I'm just tired of feeling this way. Waking up every morning, feeling helpless and feeling like the whole world is moving forward, seeing girls pass by and I'm just standing still. I mean I'm 21 going on 22, and I feel I haven't lived. People my age, friends I went to high school with are living it up! Partying, drinking, going away, shit like that! And I'm just staying home. And these are kids I've seen on a regular basis growing up. Now I'm not much of a drinker, but damn! If they are enjoying their lives, so can I! One of the best examples is you guys. Don't get me wrong,I'm happy you guys are succeeding! But you guys are moving forward, learning/failing, and I'm just standing here reading about it! Although it is entertaining. .
So my question or suggestion if there isn't anything like this up already is, what would be a newbie assignment type deal with inner game? Like day 1 : "mediate" day 2: "write goals" etc...
If there is anything up, then great! If not, then this would be an interesting post! Maybe chase or another write can make this an article sometime!
Basically I'm just trying to work inside/out. Get my inner game fundamentals down before I work on my "outer game" fundamentals. Just trying to figure something out that works forever, not just a temporary fix!
Btw sorry, but I needed to vent some of this. Haha
Thanks, TheRuralJuror

 

[Inbocca]

Have you tried the Diagnostic quiz? It gives you a free e-book that has a 30-day plan with articles and goals based on your level.

Overcoming some of these mental gaps is difficult to do outside of the moment. You spend a good amount of time of getting hyped up, filling your head with material and positive visualizations, and then you go out to the field and... it all falls flat once you choke up on that first approach. I think Chase called it overgaming or something like that. Personally, I think the Newbie Assignment is a good place to start in general. Combined with the Diagnostic quiz guide, it starts off slow enough and gives you a great foundation that can help overcome some of those harmful mindsets.

 

[Ambiance]

^Seconded

Chase will have everything you need if you want to see some results. I would personally empthasize getting very familiar with having a Process- one of the biggest things that helped me when I was starting out. When you're sitting back looking at all these other schmucks having fun and bewailing fate for not making you one of those schmucks, you're trapped. Go find a girl you like, pre-open her, direct open her, talk to her a bit, get a number on a high note, and exit strongly. Repeat 20 times.

It will be grueling at first, and you probably won't even get close to 20. My first time going out cold approaching I talked to one girl right away and then walked around for 90 minutes doing nothing and feeling like an idiot. But I kept trying.

So pick a day of the week that you can dedicate x amount of time to, EVERY WEEK, and have some fun giving the site's material some trys, and report back.

Onwards and Upwards,

Ambiance

 

[TheRuralJuror]

@Inbocca
Hey! I actually tried the quiz like you said, this morning. And I'm a beginner (obviously) haha. But yeah you are right, it gave me the Ebook to download, which I did. So I'm on day one. Which is too read the articles, some of which I've read already. But it's a fresh start. So thank you for that!

@Ambiance
Hey! You said something about how you have/had a process starting out. What was some of the things you did that helped?
Or was it the 20 times thing?

 

[Ambiance]

So when I was a beginner I didn't know what I was doing, and only vaguely knew what I wanted. Having a process changed that. For example, at speech and debate meets I went to, I wrote down a list that went something like this:
1. Wear suit, put on cologne, style hair, brush teeth, wash face
2. Once there talk to teammates/friends to get social
3. Start meeting other people
4. Find a girl you want to talk to
5. Introduce yourself
6. Move her to your table after talking for a bit
7. Hang out and play cards
8. Get her number
9. Keep hanging out during the day

Nowadays I look back on this first, somewhat flawed attempt and kind of laugh at myself, but it got the gears turning back then. I got a lot of numbers, and from there got the experience I needed to begin working on the next thing and formulate what I was going after. So figure out where you are going to meet girls (in this case it was at speech meets), and fine tune a process that gets you to a certain goal (in this case: phone number and rapport). These days I have processes for getting laid at parties and picking up girls through day game, and phone numbers, which used to be this huge objective, are now just a trivial and often unnecesary step in getting a girl in bed with me (<- my new objective)

You can also have processes for learning seduction overall, which I mostly encompassed in the first post. For me, I would set time aside 3 days a week to cold approach, and would go to parties during the weekend, and any time I saw a girl I just had to meet or it would be super easy and convenient, I'd approach. I gradually got a lot better.

Hope that helps! Lmk if you have more questions

A

 

[Mr.Rob]

RuralJuror,

Once you do all this meditation, goal writing, and positive affirmations and lets also say you are successful in changing 2-3 core mindsets you're currently lacking. Do you believe this will unlock the hidden courage you're currently saying you are lacking that will enable you to go out and life the life you actually want to live?

-Rob