- Joined
- Aug 13, 2021
- Messages
- 309
I know, you're right dude.
can't get any worse can it?
I figure if I embarrass myself enough I'll become immune
cheers
It's a Long Way to the Top (If You Wanna Rock 'N' Roll)
- Thread starter Orgasmatron
- Start date
can't get any worse can it?
I figure if I embarrass myself enough I'll become immune
cheers
- Joined
- Jul 20, 2015
- Messages
- 1,532
You know, the best beginners i know of want to get rejected. Because when they get rejected, and then understand why they got rejected...it puts them in a favorable position where they are closer to the next level...the level where they have exciting experiences with women....the type of experiences one remembers for the rest of their lives!
On the other hand, some beginners fear rejection. they can’t face the pain. so they dont even bother to continue trying. They quit and are forever stuck in the washing machine of a boring, sexless life.
- Joined
- Aug 13, 2021
- Messages
- 309
- Joined
- Aug 13, 2021
- Messages
- 309
Tuesday 3rd & Wednesday 4th May 2022
Song of the day - Spanish Caravan by The Doors
I had a bit of a mental meltdown there, sorry about that. I was feeling pretty depressed, doing all the things that make me feel worse and not doing any of the things that make me feel better. So lets dispense with all that nonsense and get back on track.
Also, these things are too long.
Main points
Things I learnt
Other stuff
Song of the day - Spanish Caravan by The Doors
I had a bit of a mental meltdown there, sorry about that. I was feeling pretty depressed, doing all the things that make me feel worse and not doing any of the things that make me feel better. So lets dispense with all that nonsense and get back on track.
Also, these things are too long.
Main points
- Felt like shit
- Coach told me that reason for girl felt uncomfortable was because I was being a nice guy and backtracked on why I was talking to her
- Concentrating on desensitising myself to approaches - so need to approach all hot girls I see, not avoid any, get the first approaches underway quickly
- Went out, did some approaches, was ignored a few times, had 3 good (debateable use of the word 'good' Andrew) interactions, Super hot Spanish girl (way out of my league btw, lol) gave me her number, seemed quite enamoured with me, but came to her senses the next day and cancelled. Coach said could be a shit test to see how much you like her, and weed out the weak, so be consistent. I was. She maintained her position.
- Felt really good after approaching
- Did 2 myself on Wednesday after work - getting a bit more comfortable with doing this now. Still got a long way to go though.
- Coach says after a month I'll notice a huge difference in my interactions - so let's go all in and see
Things I learnt
- Momentum is very important - got to start quickly too, don't avoid them
- You need to approach a whole bunch to find the ones that like you
- Be persistent - you've got nothing to lose
Other stuff
- No smoking today, got nicoteen lonzenges. In a few days I'll be cool.
- Start taking ZMA, Black Maca again
- Start doing kegel exercises again
- Ordered some Nitric Oxide booster supplements - will arrive tomorrow
- Exercise and diet - super important - start doing it again
- Joined
- Aug 13, 2021
- Messages
- 309
Thursday 5th May 2022
Song of the day - Goin' Blind by Kiss - there's a good cover version by The Melvins btw
"Little lady, can't you see. You're so young and so much different than I. I'm 93, you're sixteen. Can't you see I'm goin' blind"
Thought I'd better put the lyrics in so you guys get the reference.
Went out after work for a few hours with Brian Clough coaching from the sidelines again.
Did more approaches than ever before - so that's pretty good.
All except one were completely awful - which is fine, learn from your mistakes and all that.
Still avoiding sets - Brian says that's unacceptable - and he's right.
He sent me a few pics of some girls he'd picked up as motivation - all were stunning. I don't see too many chicks like that around here, so I don't know where he finds them, but apparently, they're just walking about. I would not have even considered approaching any of them if I'm being honest. So that's what we're working towards.
In general, the reactions I get are clear disinterest, and the now, oh so familiar, look of confusion and wishing they were somewhere else, which tbh, does just make you want to give up. Oh brilliant, it's that look again, great.
I did 8 in total, maybe more, some just walked off, so I don't know if they count.
Finished up with three progressively worse rejections in a row, from my very clumsily delivered "I think you look cute" opener
The one good one was with the girl I liked the most, so I guess that's something. Very cute Russian girl, who'd stopped outside her work for a cigarette. I had earlier lapsed in my attempts to quit today as I felt a bit stressed. So I asked her for a light. Lots of eye contact and smiles, seemed to like talking to me, and was pretty engaged in the chat, asked me some stuff, and was encouraging about my failed attempt to quit smoking. Obviously, she had a boyfriend though when I asked if she'd like to go for a drink sometime. They all have boyfriends apparently.
Pretty sure the vibe I'm giving off is awful, and I don't really know what to say.
Brian helps with what to say, but my delivery is pretty bad and the rabbit in the headlights look I'm surely emitting is evidently not a turn on for the girls.
Apparently, I need to pause, and let her answer, rather than trying to keep talking and filling in the conversation space. I talk too fast and not low enough (I'm seeking rapport)
Still need to not be tied to the outcome and not care about how it goes.
Also, need to stop avoiding sets.
Resolution for tomorrow - don't avoid talking to any girls I like the look of - I've got nothing to lose and the next day all I'll have is the action I took the day before, which I can be proud of, the rejections won't matter.
We're going to do a call to get to the root of my AA - so, hopefully, that will help.
It's pretty brutal, I'm way out of my comfort zone, and I have no clue what I'm doing.
Apparently, it will get easier and I will improve. I just need to keep taking action. We shall see.
Song of the day - Goin' Blind by Kiss - there's a good cover version by The Melvins btw
"Little lady, can't you see. You're so young and so much different than I. I'm 93, you're sixteen. Can't you see I'm goin' blind"
Thought I'd better put the lyrics in so you guys get the reference.
Went out after work for a few hours with Brian Clough coaching from the sidelines again.
Did more approaches than ever before - so that's pretty good.
All except one were completely awful - which is fine, learn from your mistakes and all that.
Still avoiding sets - Brian says that's unacceptable - and he's right.
He sent me a few pics of some girls he'd picked up as motivation - all were stunning. I don't see too many chicks like that around here, so I don't know where he finds them, but apparently, they're just walking about. I would not have even considered approaching any of them if I'm being honest. So that's what we're working towards.
In general, the reactions I get are clear disinterest, and the now, oh so familiar, look of confusion and wishing they were somewhere else, which tbh, does just make you want to give up. Oh brilliant, it's that look again, great.
I did 8 in total, maybe more, some just walked off, so I don't know if they count.
Finished up with three progressively worse rejections in a row, from my very clumsily delivered "I think you look cute" opener
- Smiled, was a bit embarrassed then - I have boyfriend
- Looked very confused at first, followed by mild fear, then - I'm not looking for a date
- Stopped and took off headphones then - I'm 16! - and stormed off
The one good one was with the girl I liked the most, so I guess that's something. Very cute Russian girl, who'd stopped outside her work for a cigarette. I had earlier lapsed in my attempts to quit today as I felt a bit stressed. So I asked her for a light. Lots of eye contact and smiles, seemed to like talking to me, and was pretty engaged in the chat, asked me some stuff, and was encouraging about my failed attempt to quit smoking. Obviously, she had a boyfriend though when I asked if she'd like to go for a drink sometime. They all have boyfriends apparently.
Pretty sure the vibe I'm giving off is awful, and I don't really know what to say.
Brian helps with what to say, but my delivery is pretty bad and the rabbit in the headlights look I'm surely emitting is evidently not a turn on for the girls.
Apparently, I need to pause, and let her answer, rather than trying to keep talking and filling in the conversation space. I talk too fast and not low enough (I'm seeking rapport)
Still need to not be tied to the outcome and not care about how it goes.
Also, need to stop avoiding sets.
Resolution for tomorrow - don't avoid talking to any girls I like the look of - I've got nothing to lose and the next day all I'll have is the action I took the day before, which I can be proud of, the rejections won't matter.
We're going to do a call to get to the root of my AA - so, hopefully, that will help.
It's pretty brutal, I'm way out of my comfort zone, and I have no clue what I'm doing.
Apparently, it will get easier and I will improve. I just need to keep taking action. We shall see.
- Joined
- Aug 13, 2021
- Messages
- 309
Friday 6th May 2022
Song of the day - Suspicious Minds by Elvis Presley
I did 3 approaches today. I was out for 5 hours and did 3 - go me, lol.
Obviously, there was lots of avoidance, and they were barely approaches, tbh
Tried to go out at lunch, and avoided 2 hot girls.
I actually thought "I hope I don't see any hot girls, because then I'll have to approach them." Great eh? That's the attitude.
I think I'm getting there though.
The 'approaches' - No Brian Clough today so unassisted
2 German girls in the park taking photographs. I selflessly offered to take some of them both, what a gent. Bit of eye contact, but they were off soon enough. It was a start though.
There was a long wait until the next one. Got a bit sick of my reverse-game tactic of letting them come to me. So decided I'll just talk to any girls I see. I was outside the concert hall as people were coming out, and asked 2 girls what the concert was - Star wars classical concert - sounded pretty good actually. They were off home soon, and probably a bit young, but again, it was a start. All was fine - no horrified looks so far today.
Walked around the corner - Blonde girl, pretty, 30ish, in a nice dress smoking outside a pub. I said "nice dress" and she was all happy and nice. From Dublin, well I'm from Belfast so we're almost neighbours. We bonded over Irishness. Anyway, chatting away, lots of eye contact, smiling, asking me stuff too (yay for Irish girls!) and this guy walks past and says "nice dress" lol. Then said "it's not a pickup line" And I'm thinking "yes it is!". Apparently, her boyfriend doesn't like it though. He's obviously an idiot. Anyway, not to worry, she's Irish, so it's all cool
Stayed out a bit longer and did some more avoiding.
Online development and weirdness
So, was talking to a girl on Hinge yesterday. 34, looks good in some pics, not as much in others, but I don't photograph well myself. Bonus though, I'm not concerned about her perhaps being a bit larger (girl last week could lose a few pounds and I was a bit suspicious of the photo angles. Maybe that was part of the problem - let's say yes, it was). We're going out tomorrow night. She's quite good at the banter, so should be a laugh anyway. I'm pretty sure I can pull her. She's not bothered about my lack of commitment to commitment and didn't raise any objections to meeting at a bar round the corner from my flat, so seems up for it. I am a bit concerned about my ability to perform however after last week's debacle, but I need to push through and if i can manage this I'll feel a lot better in that department.
Anyway, I think I've learnt from last week. 2 drinks max, not planning on being out that long anyway - Comfort, escalate and lead. Eye contact and touch to build the sexual tension. Already set a sexual frame on the apps, bot f flirting and all that. I'll maybe suggest 'a walk' and go for the kiss. I think that can be my modus operandi - so let's see.
Got another girl , 38, quite attractive actually from the pics. Wants to meet for coffee. Think she's a bit more reserved and might be a harder nut to crack. Hs only really done long term relationships before. Hopefully, I can introduce her to some new experiences and expand her horizons a bit. Won't give her number out until she's been on a few dates and wants a coffee date to start. Fair enough, there's a lot of weirdos out there. Also, good at the banter. Bonus - Doesn't like to text a lot and would prefer to get to the meet. I couldn't agree more.
And the third one - I'm quite suspicious of. 29, very attractive, East Asian. Was pretty reserved to start until I build up some comfort and now she's super keen. She got straight in with the what are you looking for on here question and wanted to get onto Whattsapp quick. I contacted my buddy on the PWF Facebook group - he said it looked fine, She facetimed me - she's not a dude, so that's a start and looks pretty nice, just like in the pics. She's actually pretty hot, and seems to like me quite a bit - Says she was very shy to be on camera, but she was very excited to see my face, lots of smiley heart emojis and thinks I'm a gentleman.
I don't know if this is just an Asian girl thing. Could be, now I think about it. But I am super wary of loveboming, so I'm not sure if I'm getting BPD vibes (I already ghosted another girl because she seemed a bit clingy before we'd even met) or if I'm just a bit over-cautious.
I'm not going to encourage her too much, but I'll give her the benefit of the doubt because she's pretty hot and it might just be a cultural thing.
Tomorrow I'm going to go do some more unassisted daygame approaches.
I've done 19 so far this week and I guess they are getting better.
Brian wants me to do 10 to 20 on Sunday - wow
I'm going to try for 10 tomorrow myself - I want to have done 100 by the end of the month
So I guess score-wise for the month of May so far, I'm at:
19 approaches
1 number and date agreed, despite it falling through the next day. Incidentally, it was from the hottest one of the lot. And the second-best interaction was from the second hottest girl - hmmmmm, food for thought Andrew!
Online - 3 dates agreed to
Actually, that's quite encouraging.
So, tomorrow's plan
Exercise
Meditate
10 approaches - do not avoid and definitely speak to the hot ones!!!
Date
Song of the day - Suspicious Minds by Elvis Presley
I did 3 approaches today. I was out for 5 hours and did 3 - go me, lol.
Obviously, there was lots of avoidance, and they were barely approaches, tbh
Tried to go out at lunch, and avoided 2 hot girls.
I actually thought "I hope I don't see any hot girls, because then I'll have to approach them." Great eh? That's the attitude.
I think I'm getting there though.
The 'approaches' - No Brian Clough today so unassisted
2 German girls in the park taking photographs. I selflessly offered to take some of them both, what a gent. Bit of eye contact, but they were off soon enough. It was a start though.
There was a long wait until the next one. Got a bit sick of my reverse-game tactic of letting them come to me. So decided I'll just talk to any girls I see. I was outside the concert hall as people were coming out, and asked 2 girls what the concert was - Star wars classical concert - sounded pretty good actually. They were off home soon, and probably a bit young, but again, it was a start. All was fine - no horrified looks so far today.
Walked around the corner - Blonde girl, pretty, 30ish, in a nice dress smoking outside a pub. I said "nice dress" and she was all happy and nice. From Dublin, well I'm from Belfast so we're almost neighbours. We bonded over Irishness. Anyway, chatting away, lots of eye contact, smiling, asking me stuff too (yay for Irish girls!) and this guy walks past and says "nice dress" lol. Then said "it's not a pickup line" And I'm thinking "yes it is!". Apparently, her boyfriend doesn't like it though. He's obviously an idiot. Anyway, not to worry, she's Irish, so it's all cool
Stayed out a bit longer and did some more avoiding.
Online development and weirdness
So, was talking to a girl on Hinge yesterday. 34, looks good in some pics, not as much in others, but I don't photograph well myself. Bonus though, I'm not concerned about her perhaps being a bit larger (girl last week could lose a few pounds and I was a bit suspicious of the photo angles. Maybe that was part of the problem - let's say yes, it was). We're going out tomorrow night. She's quite good at the banter, so should be a laugh anyway. I'm pretty sure I can pull her. She's not bothered about my lack of commitment to commitment and didn't raise any objections to meeting at a bar round the corner from my flat, so seems up for it. I am a bit concerned about my ability to perform however after last week's debacle, but I need to push through and if i can manage this I'll feel a lot better in that department.
Anyway, I think I've learnt from last week. 2 drinks max, not planning on being out that long anyway - Comfort, escalate and lead. Eye contact and touch to build the sexual tension. Already set a sexual frame on the apps, bot f flirting and all that. I'll maybe suggest 'a walk' and go for the kiss. I think that can be my modus operandi - so let's see.
Got another girl , 38, quite attractive actually from the pics. Wants to meet for coffee. Think she's a bit more reserved and might be a harder nut to crack. Hs only really done long term relationships before. Hopefully, I can introduce her to some new experiences and expand her horizons a bit. Won't give her number out until she's been on a few dates and wants a coffee date to start. Fair enough, there's a lot of weirdos out there. Also, good at the banter. Bonus - Doesn't like to text a lot and would prefer to get to the meet. I couldn't agree more.
And the third one - I'm quite suspicious of. 29, very attractive, East Asian. Was pretty reserved to start until I build up some comfort and now she's super keen. She got straight in with the what are you looking for on here question and wanted to get onto Whattsapp quick. I contacted my buddy on the PWF Facebook group - he said it looked fine, She facetimed me - she's not a dude, so that's a start and looks pretty nice, just like in the pics. She's actually pretty hot, and seems to like me quite a bit - Says she was very shy to be on camera, but she was very excited to see my face, lots of smiley heart emojis and thinks I'm a gentleman.
I don't know if this is just an Asian girl thing. Could be, now I think about it. But I am super wary of loveboming, so I'm not sure if I'm getting BPD vibes (I already ghosted another girl because she seemed a bit clingy before we'd even met) or if I'm just a bit over-cautious.
I'm not going to encourage her too much, but I'll give her the benefit of the doubt because she's pretty hot and it might just be a cultural thing.
Tomorrow I'm going to go do some more unassisted daygame approaches.
I've done 19 so far this week and I guess they are getting better.
Brian wants me to do 10 to 20 on Sunday - wow
I'm going to try for 10 tomorrow myself - I want to have done 100 by the end of the month
So I guess score-wise for the month of May so far, I'm at:
19 approaches
1 number and date agreed, despite it falling through the next day. Incidentally, it was from the hottest one of the lot. And the second-best interaction was from the second hottest girl - hmmmmm, food for thought Andrew!
Online - 3 dates agreed to
Actually, that's quite encouraging.
So, tomorrow's plan
Exercise
Meditate
10 approaches - do not avoid and definitely speak to the hot ones!!!
Date
- Joined
- Aug 13, 2021
- Messages
- 309
Saturday 7th May 2022
Song of the day - Won't Get Fooled Again by The Who
Daygame - 2 approaches - Cute glasses girl in card shop, and stunning Brazilian tourist who couldn't speak much English.
Nothing much to report. Logistics for both were unfavourable. But definitely need to talk to more girls and stop avoiding the hot ones.
Sticking points
Also, don't ask where they're from, try to guess. It doesn't matter if you're right or not, but guessing is way better.
Need to do lots more approaches, like loads!
Date
In some senses, a win - got laid
In other senses, not so much - Girl from the internet, not as attractive as I'd hoped. Pictures are not the truth.
She was cool and all, thought about not doing it, but she was very clearly keen to get fucked, so I obliged. Not exactly proud of myself, but I did get back on the horse, despite there being a bit of performance anxiety and still alcohol is a problem. 3 pints of Guinness is too much.
Considering going teetotal - Can drink non-alcoholic beer
Also, will stop smoking. Monday is the start of that. New week and everything. Exercise, good diet, and healthy lifestyle from here on in!
If I'm going to do online, then I need to do way more screening and be super picky.
This was a small bar, there were maybe 40 people in it and I counted 12 pretty hot girls there that I'd much rather have been with.
Anyway learning all the time, lol.
So, took a few goes to be able to get it up. Really wasn't keen on sleeping with her but felt I needed to get one under my belt after last week's lack of performance. Pull was super easy. She was talking about sex stuff a lot, and clearly wanted the D.
Incidentally, she was much better at blowjobs than last week's girl.
Realised after I shagged her that the condom had managed to come off.
Found it.
It appeared to be empty.
I was a bit worried about the potential implications of this.
Mentioned it a bit later.
She's on the pill.
Thank fuck.
Some takeaways
Big push on approaches today
Song of the day - Won't Get Fooled Again by The Who
Daygame - 2 approaches - Cute glasses girl in card shop, and stunning Brazilian tourist who couldn't speak much English.
Nothing much to report. Logistics for both were unfavourable. But definitely need to talk to more girls and stop avoiding the hot ones.
Sticking points
- Talking to fast
- Offering too many compliments (3 with hot Brazillian way too many)
- Seeking rapport
- Not making intent clear
Also, don't ask where they're from, try to guess. It doesn't matter if you're right or not, but guessing is way better.
Need to do lots more approaches, like loads!
Date
In some senses, a win - got laid
In other senses, not so much - Girl from the internet, not as attractive as I'd hoped. Pictures are not the truth.
She was cool and all, thought about not doing it, but she was very clearly keen to get fucked, so I obliged. Not exactly proud of myself, but I did get back on the horse, despite there being a bit of performance anxiety and still alcohol is a problem. 3 pints of Guinness is too much.
Considering going teetotal - Can drink non-alcoholic beer
Also, will stop smoking. Monday is the start of that. New week and everything. Exercise, good diet, and healthy lifestyle from here on in!
If I'm going to do online, then I need to do way more screening and be super picky.
This was a small bar, there were maybe 40 people in it and I counted 12 pretty hot girls there that I'd much rather have been with.
Anyway learning all the time, lol.
So, took a few goes to be able to get it up. Really wasn't keen on sleeping with her but felt I needed to get one under my belt after last week's lack of performance. Pull was super easy. She was talking about sex stuff a lot, and clearly wanted the D.
Incidentally, she was much better at blowjobs than last week's girl.
Realised after I shagged her that the condom had managed to come off.
Found it.
It appeared to be empty.
I was a bit worried about the potential implications of this.
Mentioned it a bit later.
She's on the pill.
Thank fuck.
Some takeaways
- got good feedback on my foreplay skills.
- the sex didn't last very long - prob need to work on that
- I now understand that daygame is the way to go - quality issue problem is evidently much less of a problem when you can see someone IRL and not have to rely on the pics they've put up to present themselves in the best possible light
- Bar near my home has lots of hot girls in it
Big push on approaches today